


you, more and more

by redsyub



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Explicit Sexual Content, Falling In Love, False Identity, Fate & Destiny, Flashbacks, Fluff, Getting Together, Holidays, Intense Emotions, M/M, POV Alternating, Past Drug Use, Romance, Sexual Tension, Some Humor, Strangers to Lovers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-29
Updated: 2020-11-12
Packaged: 2021-03-02 03:41:13
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 108,247
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23908642
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/redsyub/pseuds/redsyub
Summary: Junhui wants to know the taste of freedom and learn how to be alone. And Mingyu? He just wants to run away from the ghosts of his past.However, Junhui ends up not being alone and Mingyu is haunted by someone yet again.(Alternatively titled: The Argentinian Holiday)
Relationships: Kim Mingyu/Wen Jun Hui | Jun
Comments: 108
Kudos: 161





	1. Prologue

The screams of the crowd leave a euphoric buzz flowing in his veins as he stands backstage, jumping up and down to release the pent up tension from his limbs. His fans call out his name and Mingyu feels like he’s the _king_ of the world, ready to take over the throne and _rule_ the bloody planet. His bandmates pat his shoulder and they all perform their pre-stage ritual of huddling close and cheering for a great show. 

After he separates from the group, he walks and situates himself behind a wing, gauging the size of the crowd. Seven years ago, if Mingyu were to perform in front of thousands of people, he would’ve probably fainted. But Mingyu is 23 years old and already a veteran rockstar, whose albums have sold millions of copies all over the world. 

Now as he sees thousands of people lining up to get a glimpse of his face, he feels the _rush_ and without giving anybody a proper heads up, he struts towards the middle of the stage. The crowd _roars_ and Mingyu grabs the mic stand placed on the stage. He growls into the mic imitating a lion who wants to show his power. 

“Eh yo, New York! Are you ready to have a good night?” Mingyu yells and the crowd echoes their affirmation. Mingyu is just getting pumped for the night.

The concert is a rush of adrenaline and excitement. He sings and strums his electric guitar, playing the role of his audience’s fantasies. Mingyu feels himself as he loses himself to the music. His hair is wet and the sweat trickles down his face. He growls when the notes go low and bends his body near the edge of the stage, making his fans go crazy. 

A bra comes flying towards him and he barely manages to catch it. He looks at it and then gives his crowd a coy smile as he brings the bra near his face and sticks his tongue out. He’s just playing the role, he tells himself mentally as he licks the fabric, right where a nipple is supposed to be. The crowd goes crazy and Mingyu _absorbs_ their energy like magic.

By the end of the concert, everyone is chanting his name. His stage name, _Jade,_ echoes in the stadium along with his bandmates’ names. It’s an overwhelming feeling to have thousands of people scream your name. 

Once upon a time, Mingyu was _exhilarated_ with intense emotions for being loved by thousands. 

Now, he just wants to run away and disappear for a while. To a place where he could just be Mingyu and not Jade, the lead singer and guitarist of _SVT._

After the show, he sits in a room with other staff and managers. Everyone is discussing a huge celebration as the tour has officially ended. He tries to hide by sitting in the corner, but sometimes, he is too tall and broad for his own good. 

His manager, Minghao, walks toward him and takes a seat next to him.

“Good show.”

“Thanks for your hard work,” Mingyu says without any emotion in his voice. Nowadays, if Mingyu is not on the stage or practising, his voice usually sounds dull and mechanical. He is _tired_ of even keeping up with some kind of pretence.

In the past three years, his band has released two full-length albums and an EP, back to back, while touring around the world constantly. Three years ago, he was a rising star with so much potential to take over the crown of the music market.

Now, he is a star with too many scandals surrounding him and too many detractors trying to bring his empire down. 

“We need to talk,” Minghao says, but there is no sense of urgency in his voice. 

“What is it about?” 

“Your wish has been granted by the company.”

Mingyu whips his head towards Minghao, his eyes are wide and his jaw feels heavy. 

“Are you _serious?”_ Mingyu speaks a little loudly. Minghao hisses at his volume.

“Not here. Later.” 

“No, tell me now!” Mingyu stands up on his toes as he looks at Minghao expectantly. He has been dreaming about this for months. It’s hard to believe that somehow, it’s going to become a reality. 

All eyes in the room turn towards him, but Mingyu is least bothered about nosy people. He has waited for so long, but if he has to wait for another minute, he might explode. 

Minghao releases an annoyed sigh before looking up at him.

“There are some conditions that you _need_ to adhere to and you will constantly stay in touch with me. Other than that, you’re free to travel to any country on your own.”

Mingyu feels like a huge weight has finally been lifted off his chest. He picks up the shorter man and engulfs his body to celebrate the brilliant news. 

  
  


~•~

  
  


There are days when Junhui wishes he could just blend in with the crowd. But he only wishes these things because he _knows_ that it will never happen. He’s always surrounded by people, no matter where he goes. It’s not like he hates the people who always stay by his side. He loves them and is thankful for their existence and constant love. But there is a _feeling of independence_ that Junhui _craves_ to experience.

He looks at his batchmates, all excited to finally graduate and start a new life. According to quite a lot of them, it feels like the _end of an era._ Junhui wonders what it would feel like to not see their faces anymore. Junhui is popular. Everyone knows who he is. It’s kind of hard to miss a man like him, according to his best friend, Jeon Wonwoo. Everyone seems to gravitate towards him, like a moth drawn to a flame. 

Junhui doesn’t understand what’s so special about him. He’s just a regular foreign kid _trying_ to call Seoul his home. He’s fairly above average when it comes to academics and his family happens to live in one of the richer neighbourhoods of the city. But then, Wonwoo comes from the same neighbourhood and he's in the top 2% of the country. He’s the typical _model student_ that everyone should be swooning for. 

“Junnie!” 

Think of the devil and Junhui turns around to find Wonwoo jogging towards him. His face is flushed and he has a dishevelled appearance. Junhui won’t be surprised to know that the other man overslept and rushed his way to the university.

“You’re a sight for sore eyes,” Junhui says with a teasing glint in his eyes. Wonwoo hits his arm which makes him guffaw. Junhui tries to fix the appearance of the star student.

They make their way to the auditorium where the graduation ceremony takes place. People congratulate them and Junhui feels awkward because he’s getting unwanted attention again and should be congratulating them in return as well. He manages to softly speak a few words and return kind smiles.

After the ceremony, Wonwoo drives Junhui home. On their way back, Junhui faces the dreaded conversation with Wonwoo.

“You know, I can still book my tickets and accompany you,” Wonwoo says. There is an _urgency_ in his voice even when his eyes are fixed at the road and his face looks impassive. 

“That will defeat the purpose of this trip, Wonwoo,” Junhui tells him after a heavy pause. 

“But Junnie–” 

“Wonwoo, _please._ I am about to turn 24 years old next month. We both have masters degrees now and you’re bound to enlist sooner than later. It’s high time that I learn to face the world on my own. Don’t you have faith in me?” Junhui asks desperately because he is _tired_ of having this conversation with people – his parents, relatives, friends and even his parents’ friends. This might be the fourth time he’s having this particular discussion with Wonwoo.

“I don’t.” Wonwoo deadpans and Junhui feels _betrayed,_ but he doesn’t argue any further and they both stay quiet for a while.

“Promise me that you’ll call every day,” Wonwoo says out of the blue.

“It’s only for a week,”

_“Junnie.”_ There is no escape when Wonwoo calls his name in a stern tone.

“I promise.” 

After a few minutes, Wonwoo parks the car in front of Junhui’s house. Junhui is bound to leave the country in two days. He would be lying if he said that he isn’t scared at all. In fact, he’s _terrified_ to travel alone to a foreign country. But this is the _exact_ reason why he has decided to travel alone in the first place. He’s trying to face his fears and learn to be more independent.

“You can’t even speak Spanish,” Wonwoo practically complains as one last resort to make Junhui change his mind. 

“Neither can you,” Before Wonwoo can argue any further, Junhui continues, _“I’ll be fine!_ Stop worrying. I’ll see you tomorrow, okay? I love you. Bye-bye!” Junhui flings himself out of the car and runs towards his house. 

Junhui really loves Wonwoo and appreciates the man’s concern, but he can’t be around people who try to change his mind, just a couple of days before his flight takes off, at the moment.

  
  


~•~

  
  


“I think the last time I saw your hair coloured black was probably 2015 when I got the job to become your manager,” Minghao comments as he watches Mingyu fix his hairstyle. He is sitting on a plush chair placed beside one of the windows of Mingyu’s bedroom. 

The two men are gathered in Mingyu’s SoHo apartment that overlooks the Hudson River. The apartment looks spotless, mostly because Mingyu rarely ever gets the chance to come back home and rest. It’s not even his _proper home._ It’s a house that hasn’t been lived in long enough to call it a home. If he isn’t on tour, he most likely stays in one of the hotels in Los Angeles for recording and collabs. 

“Yeah, natural hair might help me stay lowkey,” Mingyu says while walking towards his closet and finishing up with his packing. 

“Instead of travelling to Buenos Aires, why aren’t you visiting your family in Seattle? Don’t you miss them?” Minghao asks while he arranges all the travel related documents on the small table placed in between the two chairs. Mingyu barks out a sarcastic laugh and clenches his fist to rein in the anger simmering deep inside of him.

“Of course, I _miss_ them! But what am I supposed to tell them when they ask me about my life?” Mingyu fires back a rhetorical question. When Minghao gives him no response, he says the obvious answer, “Oh, my life has been amazing. It’s filled with meaningless sex and drugs. You know, the usual.” Mingyu modulates his voice so that he sounds like the ideal son. The irony in his voice just exaggerates the _ridiculousness_ behind Minghao’s suggestion. But there is no point in ridiculing Minghao. So, he lets his body sag and takes a deep breath.

“It’s better if I avoid them for a while. My name has been linked with quite a few scandals already.” And this is how Mingyu finds himself _haunted_ by the ghosts of his past. Once, he enjoyed _dancing with the devils._ Now, he badly craves for some kind of _exorcism_ to cleanse his soul and get rid of all his sins. Maybe this trip would help him forget his past for a while. 

“I thought you enjoyed that life,” Minghao says in a snarky tone. Mingyu knows he’s mocking him. Minghao had _always_ tried to steer Mingyu away from every single wrong direction that he took. But Mingyu was so addicted to the rush he experienced when he lost himself mindlessly to feeble pleasures. He tried to justify his actions by reassuring himself that it helped him write and compose better. 

“I never enjoyed it. It just fit the persona that the label wanted to present to the fans. I hate it.” Mingyu replies meekly. He takes a deep breath and tries to dismiss the dark thoughts slowly creeping inside his head. 

Mingyu hasn’t had time to himself in years. After the tour ended, his label expected him to step inside the recording studio again to record the next album. Thankfully, Mingyu’s bandmate Jihoon, who usually is the main songwriter and composer of all their songs, demanded a break and told their management that they were all _burned out_ and just needed some time to themselves. The management definitely showed their reluctance, but after some mind-numbing meetings, the band finally won the argument. 

As soon as the news of their break was spread, Mingyu knew he needed to run away from everything. But being a popular musician has its drawbacks. He couldn’t just walk out of his house without being bombarded by his fans and paparazzi. _Privacy_ and _anonymity_ is a privilege that Mingyu lost years ago. He randomly chose to travel to Argentina as he learnt that his popularity in the country was negligible which _actually_ made him very happy.

Minghao stands up from his place and dusts off his coat laying on the bed. He wears the big outerwear that drapes over his slim body and runs his lithe fingers through his silky black hair. 

“Just remember to keep in touch. And don’t make a fool out of yourself. _Comprende?”_ Minghao shoots his eyebrows up and gives Mingyu a questioning look.

“Yeah, I understand.” Mingyu rubs his eyes and picks up his luggage. Minghao stores the documents in Mingyu’s backpack and carries it with himself. They both make their way out of the apartment and head to the airport. 

Mingyu is happy to finally get away from all the chaos. His heart and mind are finally at _peace._


	2. Day 1

Junhui is nervous and scared, but he _can’t_ let those emotions surface on his face. He practically spent more than a day lounging in an airplane, just to reach his destination. When he arrives at the Airbnb that he’s rented out for the week, he abandons his luggage in the living area and makes a beeline towards the bedroom. The moment his body makes an _impact_ with the soft bed, he passes out and _ascends_ to the dreamland. 

After several hours of recuperation, Junhui wakes up to the morning light. In a way, he’s glad he slept for almost 17 hours and woke up at a reasonable hour. He wants to wake up and finally explore the house he’s going to live in for a week but groans into the bed as the growling sounds coming from his stomach grow louder and louder. In his dishevelled state, he makes his way to the kitchen and opens the fridge. He’s happy that the kitchen is stocked and mentally blesses the host of the place. 

After appeasing his stomach, he _finally_ observes the place. The house is designed to accommodate the bohemian style, fitting with the theme of the neighbourhood it is in, San Telmo. It is in one of the oldest parts of Buenos Aires and he’s already in love with the place. The colourful ambience is such a stark contrast when compared to his own house in Seoul which has a minimalist design. The beautiful colours throw a sense of artistic expression in Junhui’s thoughts and he loves it.

After taking a shower and wearing fresh clothes, Junhui makes his way out of the house. He is _determined_ to walk the streets of the neighbourhood all by himself. He feels like a _new man_ already with his freshly bleached, honey blonde hair. Obviously, Wonwoo had mocked his choice, but the good thing is that Wonwoo isn’t here to chastise every single one of his moves anymore. He is a free man and he feels a little more _alive_ with the scent of _independence_ surrounding his being. 

The murals lining up the streets fascinate him and the pictures in his photo gallery keep on increasing. When he turns on a corner, he finds the most _adorable_ mural of a big black cat on the shutter of a shop. He wants to click the photo and send it to Wonwoo. Their shared love of cats keeps them together. It’s also an inside joke between them as the whole world keeps comparing the two men to cats. 

After clicking the photo, he checks it, but something doesn’t feel _right._ He decides it would be much better if he were in the frame as well. But when he tries to take a selfie, he can’t seem to fit the cat in the frame properly. It’s a frustrating feeling, but Junhui doesn’t want to give up on it just because he’s _alone._ Surely, he can always ask someone to help him and have them click a picture of him.

His luck chimes in when he notices a man walking towards him. He’s wearing a beige straw hat and a camera is dangling from his neck. Junhui concludes that he might be a tourist as well. 

“Um, excuse me! Do you speak English?” Junhui calls out as the man attempts to pass him. Junhui notices that the man flinches at his attempt to ask for help and he’s already trying to pass him while keeping his head low. But Wen Junhui is a _persistent_ man.

“I just need you to click a photo of me with this mural and then you can go on your way, sir!” That makes the stranger stop in his tracks. He turns around and Junhui finally gets to see his face. 

_‘Oh, dear.’_

The rude stranger is apparently a _good looking_ man and Junhui finds his annoyance melting away. He’s both tall (taller than Junhui) and broad. But he has a kind face with soft features and gentle curves. His dark eyes look even kinder and something about the man has him _transfixed_ to his place. 

Suddenly, Junhui feels like his mouth is _drying_ up and he needs to focus on his _breathing._ He tries to gather his bearings by licking his lips and following it by taking a huge gulp of his own saliva to alleviate the dryness. The man’s eyes _follow_ his actions. 

Thankfully, the man nods his head and extends his hand towards Junhui. Something about the way the man reacts makes Junhui smile. He doesn’t know the man standing in front of him, but he finds him endearing. 

Junhui hands him his phone and walks towards the mural. He raises his right hand and makes the peace sign while giving a tight-lipped smile towards the stranger. His phone is silent, but he is sure that the stranger has clicked quite a few photos, so he relaxes his body. He reaches for his phone, but can’t help and notice that the stranger seems _lost._ His eyes are transfixed on Junhui. More like he’s staring particularly at his _lips._

Junhui is all alone and this is the exact reason why he wants to be a little bolder. Although, a rational part of his mind tells him to thank the stranger and just leave. But rationality is _boring._ Something possesses him and he just wants to tease the stranger for shamelessly ogling him. 

“Is there something on my face?” Junhui asks with his head cocked to one side. 

The stranger is taken aback by the question and it’s like he finally realises what he’s doing. Junhui watches quietly as the man’s flawless sun-kissed face turns into a faint red in a matter of seconds. 

“I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to! It’s just you have moles on top of your lips.” The stranger splutters words and Junhui realises his English is quite good. He might be a native speaker for all he knows. His voice is low and there is a bit of roughness in his tone. But it’s strong and there is smokiness in his voice. Junhui is strangely reminded of _whisky._

“And what about them?” Junhui presses further.

“They’re just nice to look at.” The man relents and looks down at his shoes. The redness has already reached his ears.

“Just _nice?”_

“I don’t know what words I can use to describe them. I’m not trying to sexually harass you.” The stranger confesses in a small voice. Junhui finally loses it. He ditches his act and laughs freely. His body is bent and his palm supports his face. The stranger stands awkwardly and Junhui schools in his laughter.

“I’m sorry, but I think you’re funny,” Junhui says as he straightens his body. He points towards his phone and continues. “Anyway, thank you for clicking my picture! Have a nice day!” Junhui smiles and starts to walk past the stranger. 

There is a feeling running _deep_ inside Junhui. It feels like smoke is filling inside a vessel that is Junhui’s body. For some _odd_ reason, he wants the stranger to stop him from walking away. It's wishful thinking, but a part of him wants to talk more and learn about him. It already feels like he has imposed on him and he can’t do anything more than just wait for him to do something, _anything._

“Excuse me!” He hears the stranger pacing towards him. A smile _blooms_ on his face, but he tries to look oblivious as he turns around to face him again.

“Yes?”

“Are you travelling alone?” The strangers ask in a rush. Junhui is actually caught _off guard_ as he didn’t expect the man to be so straightforward. 

“Are you trying to _suggest_ something?” Junhui asks in an offended manner.

“Actually, yes,” He scratches the back of his neck and Junhui gathers that the man is nervous. “You see, I am alone and I’ve heard so much about _parrilla_ and it’s almost lunchtime. If you don’t mind, would you like to join me? It would be convenient for both of us if we eat together. That way, we can order more variety.”

Junhui is _baffled,_ to say the least. He was under the assumption that the stranger was attracted to him, but this is definitely taking the piss. Although, the request is quite reasonable and even Junhui is fond of eating food. It would be nice to eat a variety of dishes in one sitting. Also, he hasn’t had proper food in the last 24 hours and the offer is quite _tempting._

“What’s parrilla?” Junhui asks to make sure what has been put on the table. The stranger’s eyes go wide as a saucer.

“You don’t know?” Junhui just shrugs in return.

“You’re a tourist, right?” The stranger tries to confirm. Junhui nods because he suddenly feels like an _idiot_ and he doesn’t want to come off as a bigger one with his voiced words.

“Well, it’s Argentinian grilled meat. Come on, you should really join me,” The stranger nods his head towards the direction he was supposed to be walking in. Junhui hesitates. Even when he wants to know the man, he dreads that something awful will happen to him. He shouldn’t trust just any tall, tan and handsome man who walks his way. “I promise I’m _not_ going to harm you. You’re free to go your way after we have food.” The stranger smiles to assure Junhui. 

Junhui watches the man and the more he looks, the _more_ he craves for something he can’t quite understand yet.

“Okay, lead the way.”

  
  


~•~

  
  


It is fascinating how Mingyu finds himself attracted to a man on the _first_ day of his vacation. It’s so typical of him. But something about the man he’s walking with at the moment evokes a feeling _deep_ inside his chest. 

Maybe it’s the way he speaks. He’s not a native English speaker, Mingyu notices, but the confidence with which he speaks is striking. His voice has an essence of fruitiness in it and a part of him wants to _taste_ the sweetness behind it. And then, there are those two moles right above his Cupid’s bow. They are bloody _sinful._ Does this man even grasp the fact that his lips are created to be appreciated, adored and maybe kissed on a regular basis? Mingyu wants to look away, but his eyes unintentionally land on his lips. 

But the most interesting fact that has Mingyu wanting to stick to the person is that this stranger has _no idea_ who he really is. His face shows no recognition and for the first time in years, Mingyu is excited to meet a stranger. Usually, when he meets a new person, they are already well versed with his life story while he ends up with a blank slate for the other.

He is thanking all the stars in the universe that the stranger bought his lame attempt at trying to hangout for a longer time. He can’t just let him go. He needs a lot of things in life. Getting to know the stranger is on the _top_ of his list.

They are walking side by side and the afternoon sun is _brutally hot_ even when it’s supposed to be the autumn season in Argentina. Mingyu still somehow craves for the _warmth_ of the other man and tries to shift closer to him after every cut they make.

“What’s your name?” The stranger asks. Mingyu instantly tenses up. He wants to hold onto his anonymity for as long as possible. He can’t reveal just yet that he is _technically_ a very famous rockstar.

“Gyu.” He settles with the shortened version of his real name.

_“Q?”_ The stranger asks in a confused manner. Mingyu tries to repeat to rectify his pronunciation, but as he turns around to look at the stranger, his eyes land on his lips and it’s a lost battle, to begin with.

“Mingyu.” He finally gives up and thinks that the man still has no clue who he is and it shouldn’t matter. 

“Mingyu?” He watches his lips curl around the vowels of his name. He concludes that he is truly and royally _fucked._

“Are you Korean?” He hears the stranger ask, weirdly enough, in Korean. His grasp of words is stronger and it feels like he’s more comfortable speaking Korean than English. Mingyu didn’t see this coming. The stranger is supposed to be Korean?

“Yes. But I was born and raised in America.” Mingyu replies in Korean as well. It is his mother tongue after all, and even if he has no problem conversing in English, there is something authentic about speaking Korean. Plus, he feels that the stranger isn’t very comfortable speaking English.

“Nice. In that case, I’m Junhwi or Jun if you like,” Mingyu doesn’t know what his name means, but it somehow seems to suit him. “I was raised in South Korea.” 

“Only raised?” 

“Yeah, I’m Chinese. Junhwi is my Korean name. If you want my Chinese one, it’s Junhui. My father moved to Seoul when I was a toddler. I’ve been living there ever since,” Junhui rambles off and Mingyu needs to focus better to keep up with him. He strangely finds himself becoming fond of the other man.

Junhui suddenly stops speaking and slaps his hand against his mouth. Mingyu looks at him with knitted brows. He was really enjoying himself while he listened to Junhui’s sweet voice. He wishes the other man continues speaking.

“I’m sorry. We’re strangers and I’m probably oversharing. I sincerely apologise.” Junhui looks down at his shoes as he walks. Mingyu wants a lot of things. But currently, he just wants Junhui to treat him like an old friend. Like they’ve known each other for years.

“It’s alright. I’m a good listener,” Mingyu is a terrible listener, but he’s willing to change his ways for Junhui. And suddenly he finds himself asking a couple of questions. What is happening to him? Why does he feel this way? “I really don’t mind. Truth be told, I’m actually really interested in getting to know you.” Mingyu confesses and he feels just a little bit exposed. He hasn’t tried to initiate companionship with someone else in so long.

“Really?” Junhui asks and his eyes twinkle again.

“Really.”

He watches a smile bloom on Junhui’s face and he finds himself smiling involuntarily. It’s automatic. There’s a _rush_ and he feels _electricity_ buzzing around them. 

They finally reach the steakhouse and find a table inside the place. He wishes it’s at the corner of the restaurant and the table gives them the benefit of privacy. Kim Mingyu obviously has the worst of luck. It’s right in the middle of the place and he feels exposed. They sit across each other and Mingyu feels like eleven pairs of eyes are on him. He prays that nobody in here recognises who he is. 

“So, Mingyu? Tell me about yourself.” Junhui asks him after they’ve placed their order and are waiting for the meat to arrive. Mingyu hates the question. Every single cell in his body _compels_ him to lie to Junhui. He has to lie. It doesn’t matter how loudly his heart _screams_ inside, he can’t reveal his identity. It is risky at the moment. 

He fidgets with his phone and pretends to check something. The truth is he’s trying to come up with an excuse. He sneaks a glance at the other man and he’s baffled by the fact that Junhui keeps getting prettier and prettier as the time passes by. A _fire_ has been ignited and something simmers deep inside Mingyu’s stomach. He takes a deep gulp and tries to extinguish the flames.

“I work in the service industry and provide goods to people,” In a way, it’s not a complete lie. He does provide songs to people. Although he’s also involved with the manufacturing process of it and chooses to omit the technicalities for now. Hopefully, Junhui doesn’t persist on it for too long.

“Interesting.” Junhui drawls with an animated smile. Mingyu finds it amusing.

“You can say it’s boring. I won’t be offended,” He counters. After all, how can he get offended over something he doesn’t do in the first place?

“As long as you get by, who am I to judge?” Junhui shrugs and picks up the glass of water. He drinks it messily and a few drops of water trickle down his lips, down his neck, over the prominent lump on his neck and disappears under the collar of his shirt. The _fire_ starts to spread a little.

“I guess. What about you?” Mingyu throws the question towards Junhui. 

“I graduated with a masters degree last week. I’m trying to take a little break before corporate life hits me hard, you know?” Junhui replies with an air of indifference like he can’t be bothered with his choices. 

“Wait, _masters?_ How old are you?” Mingyu asks.

“I’ll be 24 in June. I feel like you’re younger than me and you should address me as hyung,” A smirk forms on Junhui’s face as he replies.

“Why do you think I’m younger?”

“I don’t know, there is an air of immaturity surrounding you. I don’t mean to offend you and I’m sure you’ve experienced a lot of things, but I just have this _hunch_ where my heart, I mean my _mind_ says I need to look out for you.” Junhui fumbles through some words, panic colouring his face, but Mingyu’s interest piques.

“Yeah, hyung. I am younger than you by a year. So are you going to pay for our lunch?” Mingyu throws a shit-eating grin towards Junhui. 

“Of course, Mingyu-yah!” There is a huge smile on Junhui’s face and Mingyu knows it’s a fake smile and sarcasm is dripping from it. But fondness peeks through it and Mingyu feels like he’s been graced by an angel. His heart beats a little faster after hearing his name being called so fondly by Junhui. 

The server brings lamb chinchulines and goat mollejas for starters. The smoke wafts in between them from the freshly grilled meat. The tantalising smell of the ambrosial food makes Mingyu’s mouth salivate. He watches as Junhui grabs the knife and fork and starts cutting the meat. He then places a huge chunk of meat in Mingyu’s plate before helping himself.

“Thanks.” Mingyu tries to compose himself and not coo at the man’s thoughtfulness.

After a few bites, Mingyu suggests that they order beer and Junhui returns a positive nod. 

“How long is your trip supposed to be?” Mingyu asks in between mouthful of bites. 

“A week.”

“Wow, same! Do you have any fixed plan for what you want to do for the week?” 

Junhui takes his time replying as he is busy enjoying the food. Mingyu thinks his _karma_ is coming to him in full force. He has always been the man who seduces his fans by throwing suggestive looks and writing lewd lyrics. And now here he sits, in an Argentinian grill house with absolutely delicious food, and watches a very handsome man _moan_ around every bite. Mingyu thinks it should be _illegal_ for a man like Junhui to enjoy his food in the public.

His rose pink lips are glossed over by grease and his cheeks are full because of the tasty meat. Mingyu imagines a scene where Junhui can make the same face while enjoying _another kind_ of meat. He adjusts his legs and rubs his eyes. He really needs to get a hold of himself and also get his head out of the gutter in the process.

“Mhmm, not really. Why? Are you trying to suggest something?” Junhui asks and his eyes glint again. _Déjà vu._ Mingyu sees a lot of scenarios running through his mind and he’s certain about one thing. He wants to spend the whole week with Junhui. He doesn’t care in what context they stay together. As long as he’s beside Junhui, he thinks he’ll be fine.

“Actually, yes,” Mingyu leans forward but is interrupted by the server who brings them bife de chorizo and some delectable special cuts. Junhui thanks the server, and Mingyu waits for him to leave them alone. “We are both alone. Wouldn’t it be better if we stick together and explore the city?” Mingyu suggests and looks at Junhui while biting his lips. He is nervous and is afraid of rejection. He feels exposed and is scared of crying in a public place. 

“It would be convenient to stick together,” Junhui muses loudly while looking at the food and avoiding Mingyu’s eyes.

“You can say no. I don’t want to force this arrangement on you, hyung.” Mingyu tries to take back his suggestion halfway. He watches as Junhui struggles to come up with an answer for a while. Mingyu feels dejected at the thought of his imminent rejection but tries to stay quiet and continue with his lunch. He wishes he hadn’t spoken a word because the air surrounding them feels _suffocating._

“Where are you staying?” Junhui asks suddenly. Mingyu panics because he can’t outright say that he’s staying in a suite of a five-star hotel in Puerto Madero which has a lovely river view. It will show his privileges and lead to questions regarding his actual status and identity.

So like the _liar_ that the music industry has raised him up to be, he says the first thing that comes up in his mind, “I’m staying at a hostel in Palermo,” 

“Oh? I rented out an Airbnb here in San Telmo itself,” Junhui says while cutting up his portion of meat. Mingyu watches him as he thinks about something and hesitates. “It’s big enough and if you feel like join–oh my god, what am I saying?” Junhui mutters the last few words to himself, but Mingyu hears them anyway. 

Something wakes inside him. He wants so much from life, but at the moment, he just wants to be near Junhui. The hope that Junhui is even considering living together for the rest of the trip is good enough. Their whole situation is bizarre and Mingyu shouldn’t deny the foreignness between them even when they speak the same language. But a voice in his head says that Junhui is somehow _familiar._ The voice is repeating itself _over_ and _over._

Their encounter feels like a _stroke of serendipity._

“Are you offering me a place, hyung?” Mingyu asks politely, almost whispering because it all feels too good to be true. 

“I guess I am,” Junhui sounds a bit lost. A grimace falls on his face and he looks almost pensive. “I mean, I know it sounds _crazy_ and we barely know each other, but I feel this connection. Maybe it’s because of the familiarity of language in a foreign place or maybe something else. But even when I don’t know a lot about you, I can’t seem to comprehend the fact that we are mere strangers. I just–”

Mingyu interrupts Junhui by moving his hand forward and placing it above Junhui’s still hand on the table. This is the first time they have touched each other physically and Mingyu feels a _current._ It’s electric and Mingyu takes it as a sign. Junhui feels the current as well because he flinches and looks at Mingyu with apprehensive eyes. 

Mingyu stares into his eyes and realises that their meeting was meant to be. 

“Hyung, I know how you feel. I feel the same way.” Mingyu squeezes Junhui’s hands and the warmth spreads inside his being and _melts_ his soul. It makes him smile and Junhui smiles in return. 

  
  


~•~

  
  


Junhui understands why Wonwoo was so worried about him. It wasn’t about the fact that Junhui was travelling alone. It was actually about the fact that Junhui _can’t_ physically stay alone. One way or another, he finds someone to keep him company. And the worrying part is that it is not always necessary that his companion should turn out to be a nice person. 

Junhui is probably an emotional fool. But this time, he really can’t help it. Mingyu is a force to be reckoned with. He has no clue about the man’s identity or status and he isn’t even sure if Mingyu is his real name. But he feels something akin to _belongingness_ with Mingyu. 

He feels as if every single star and planet in the universe conspired to have them meet in a foreign land, away from familiarity.

“Junhwi hyung! Tell you what? I’ll go to my hot-hostel and get my stuff and then meet you at your place. How does that sound?” Mingyu informs Junhui about his plan. 

They are finished with their scrumptious lunch. Junhui didn’t really learn a lot about the other man. He only knows that his name is Mingyu, he probably works a boring service-based job, he’s technically American, but his lineage is Korean and he wanted an escape from his overbearing life so he travelled to Buenos Aires all alone. 

After only knowing the bare minimum about the man, Junhui, being the pure and innocent idiot, offered him a place at his accommodation. Isn’t that a lovely story? Maybe Junhui watched a crime documentary with the same premise, but it’s not like life has to always imitate art. 

“Sounds good. Are you sure you don’t want me to accompany you? I don’t have anything important to do at the moment. I won’t mind.” Junhui tries to change Mingyu’s mind. 

“No!” Mingyu rejects his idea vehemently. Then he shakes his head and tries to speak in a civilised manner. “What I’m _trying_ to say is I don’t want to burden you and take more advantage of your kindness. You are already offering me a better place to stay! I can’t have you handling the logistics of my luggage as well.” 

“You haven’t even seen the place and you’re calling it a better place,” Junhui scoffs. He wants to trust Mingyu, but the younger man keeps giving him reasons to grow suspicious. He understands that Mingyu doesn’t want him to follow. Junhui can practically hear the telltale ring of the _first warning_ bell. Although the sound turns out to be of a bus passing by them. But the metaphorical bell ringing persists.

“My heart says it is a better place.” Mingyu winks at Junhui and shows his blinding smile. He has pronounced canines and Junhui instantly associates him to a very big, but adorable dog. And Junhui has a _weakness_ for animals and people who resemble animals. Jeon Wonwoo is a very big example of this inherent weakness. 

He is baffled by the knowledge that after years of trying to avoid any sort of serious commitment, he’s standing at the edge of the precipice. One careless move and he will fall deep into the bottomless pit of love and the pain that it comes along with. It is a _horrible void_ and Junhui doesn’t want to even imagine the possibility. 

He stares deep into Mingyu’s eyes and tries to find something. He desperately searches for some kind of a crack that will help him peer inside his soul. His eyes are dark and gentle. They feel like someone is singing him a _lullaby at midnight._ Junhui feels dizzy and lost, but he also knows that it’s okay because he’s in a safe space. 

“Go on then. I’ll see you later.” Junhui says in a light tone. At least he hopes he sounds unbothered. 

“I hope this address is yours and you are not trolling me,” Mingyu waves the piece of paper in the air comically before folding it and keeping it safely in his pocket. “I’ll see you soon, Jun hyung!” 

And with that, Mingyu walks away in the opposite direction. Junhui stands still and watches him walk away, till the man climbs into the Uber he had booked earlier and the car drives off. Only a mirage of his figment remains in Junhui’s periphery. 

He turns around and walks back to his apartment with his head hung low. The guilt is eating him up. It sits on his chest like a snake, waiting for its prey to make another wrong move so that it can sting him and have its poison pump through his veins. 

When he finally arrives back in the apartment, he takes a cold shower. He lets the cold droplets of water spray down his heated body. It feels like his body has been burning for so long. Mingyu’s gaze is gentle, but it leaves a _fiery_ sensation all over Junhui’s body. He _knows_ that Mingyu wants to be more than just a travel companion. Anybody with eyes can see that. Nobody stares at another person’s lips constantly unless they wish to cover them with their own.

But deep inside, Junhui knows that what he’s feeling is so much greater than just casual lust. It’s a _yearning_ he’s willing to live with forever. Maybe he’s thinking like a romantic fool, but he’s out and about in a beautiful city where the romance still reigns. Just this once, he can allow himself to fall in deep. 

Mingyu arrives at his apartment about an hour later. He’s got a big suitcase and a backpack. He isn’t wearing the straw hat anymore and his charcoal black hair looks soft and fluffy. Junhui’s fingers itch. He wants to run his fingers through Mingyu’s hair, maybe rest his palm on his cheek and tilt his chin down. It would be so easy to just lean in and take something and also give something the other has wanted for so long. But this isn’t a romantic movie and Junhui needs to be responsible. 

“Wow! This is such a pretty place, hyung. It feels like a bohemian paradise.” Mingyu says as he walks slowly, taking in the beauty of the old warehouse which has been converted into a house. The place is filled with potted plants. Some are placed on the table, some on the floor and some hang off from the ceiling. 

Junhui guides Mingyu towards the bedroom to place his luggage. Mingyu graciously accepts Junhui’s hospitality, but later on, argues that he’ll sleep on the couch. Junhui is a little surprised that the younger man isn’t advancing on him, but he accepts it and is somewhat glad.

After getting ready for the evening, they both head out to explore the city. Mingyu looks like a vision, dressed in a mint green polo shirt and jeans accompanied with white sneakers. Junhui has a very hard time believing that Mingyu is just a common man and not already famous for his handsome looks. The evening sun hits his _beautiful honey skin_ and makes him look like a god among the mortals. Junhui also has a hard time trying to compose his thoughts and act normally around him. 

Junhui chooses to wear a casual white shirt and blue jeans. They decide to visit the National Museum of Fine Arts in Recoleta. The Uber ride is quiet. They both choose to use their phones instead of filling the ride with conversations. They exchange a little information here and there, but mostly, the ride feels formal. 

When they finally reach the museum, Junhui thinks it’s an idyllic excursion for a first date. Surrounded by works of the European masters from pre-Renaissance days to the present, Junhui finds himself getting inspired for a craft he isn’t used to. He sees masterpieces of Van Gogh, El Greco, Monet and Picasso, but strangely finds himself loving Argentinian art more. He also sneaks glances at Mingyu from time to time. It feels like the man _belongs_ in a museum like this. His beauty is on another level and if it were up to Junhui, he would _showcase_ Mingyu in every single museum in the world. 

Mingyu clicks a lot of photographs with his camera. Sometimes, Junhui catches him stealing some clicks of his own profile. Junhui feels conscious, but the sense of delight he gets is undeniable. He tries to not let his feelings crawl over his face and teases Mingyu for his inability to be sneaky. 

“I’m not trying to be sneaky. You are way more beautiful than most of these works, hyung.” Junhui feels like his breath has been knocked out of his chest. Mingyu’s tone suggests that he is admitting the _simplest truth_ in this world. It leaves Junhui in a constant state of perplexity.

They both stand in front of a sculpture of an embracing nude couple. The plaque reads _‘The Kiss, Rodin’._

“Hyung? Do you know the story behind this sculpture?” Mingyu asks. Junhui shakes his head. He knows about the artist, but he has never really paid attention to the history of his works.

“Well, there was this Italian noblewoman and she fell in love with her husband’s younger brother. Obviously, her husband found out about their love affair and killed them both. If you look closely, you’ll see that their lips aren’t touching. The experts suggest that they both were killed without their lips ever having touched.” Mingyu recites the story with a thoughtful look on his face.

“I think it’s so tragic. Love is not something we can control. It happens when you least expect it. Take this couple for instance. The woman never planned on cheating on her husband and the man never wished to betray his own brother. But even when they fell in love, the outside forces didn’t allow them to stay together. They died together, but at what cost? Love is such a _helpless_ thing.” Mingyu finishes and turns towards Junhui. 

It feels like Junhui sees his own helplessness reflected in Mingyu’s eyes. He’s right. Love is something that they can’t control. It happens when a person least expects it. Junhui wonders if what he feels for Mingyu at the moment could be compared with the beginning of what people like to term as _love._

“What about that book the man is holding?” Junhui points towards the sculpture.

“They fell in love while reading about the tales of courtly love. Their death was supposed to represent some poetic justice.” Mingyu replies while rubbing his nose.

“I think their story _bleeds_ the pure emotions of romantic and physical love,” Junhui comments after a while of observation. 

“Youthful passion,” Mingyu adds. Then he looks behind Junhui and his expression drops from thoughtful to annoyed. 

“There is this woman who has been stalking you for quite a while. She’s standing a little further behind you.” Mingyu informs Junhui. It makes him smile a little. Only because the situation is rather ridiculous. He doesn’t even turn around to look at the woman. 

“Too bad for her. I’m gay.” Junhui comments while moving past Mingyu to observe other pieces. He does manage to notice Mingyu’s eyes go wide before the realisation hits him. Mingyu follows him like a puppy. For a man so big, he’s too cute.

“I didn’t know. I’m gay, too!” Mingyu hurries after him and stands close to him. His eyes have a different spark now. Maybe the lack of knowledge of Junhui’s sexuality was stopping him from something before, but there is no inhibition now. 

“I have known that from the moment we met, Mingyu,” Junhui says it in the most neutral tone possible. 

Mingyu doesn’t seem offended by that knowledge. If anything, a grin appears on his perfect face. Junhui’s eyes land on the mole on his cheek. The freckles are really strange imperfections on a human body, Junhui wonders. They have these hypnotic powers that make a human powerless. Junhui’s body is a canvas filled with such hypnotic freckles. He catches Mingyu staring at his lips again. Junhui wants something and he’s starting to see exactly what it is.

“I feel like this is the _perfect place_ where two people start _falling in love_ while talking about the tales of tragic love.” 

Junhui realises he has finally made that careless move. He is now _falling_ into the bottomless pit. 

  
  


~•~

  
  


Mingyu sees the light at the end of the tunnel. Earlier, he was preparing himself to be content with just Junhui’s existence by his side. Now, he’s craving for the _full course meal._ He wants to know everything there is to know about Junhui. He wants to hold the man tight in his embrace. He wants to feel those lips slot against his own. He wants, he wants, _he wants_ so much more than he has ever wanted before. 

“What do you want to do now?” Junhui asks as they exit the museum. The sun has set and the streetlights flood the city. Junhui looks breathtaking even under the artificial fluorescent lights, being the only real thing in Mingyu’s eyes. He focuses his camera and takes another photo of the other man. 

“Let’s go to a microbrewery and try the locally crafted beer,” Mingyu suggests.

“It better be a place with good food or else I’m bailing,” Junhui says haughtily with pouty lips and narrowed eyes. Mingyu fondly looks at the other man, _dreaming_ of a far off reality.

“I will only take you to the best places, hyung!” Mingyu replies with a cheeky grin. Junhui punches him lightly on the shoulder and turns around to walk in the other direction. Mingyu catches a shy smile blooming on his face and he decides if his cheesy flirting will make Junhui smile like that, then so be it. 

The place they arrive at is a very famous brewery and they are lucky that they are here early and the place hasn't become crowded yet. They both find two empty stools at the bar and make themselves comfortable. 

A very handsome bartender with a sharp nose and jaw stands before them and gives them a blinding smile.

“Hello! Are you both Korean?” He asks in Spanish. Mingyu wordlessly nods and smiles. 

“Oh, good! I was right when I thought you both spoke Korean. It’s been a while since I met my countrymen. Hello, I’m Seokmin and I’ll be serving you today!” The bartender–Seokmin replies in Korean. He hands them both the menu.

“It’s all written in Spanish.” Junhui deadpans. 

“It’s okay, I can recommend you the good ones. Do you have any specific preference?” Seokmin asks Junhui. The older man looks at Mingyu for some help. His big nut-brown eyes have confusion written over them.

“Don’t you normally drink beer?” Mingyu asks while trying to hold himself back from teasing Junhui. The man is just too adorable at times.

“I _drink_ beer! But I haven’t done a PhD in it. I just drink whatever is available, you know?” Junhui replies and it makes sense. Some people just drink alcohol for the sake of it. For them, it isn’t about the taste. It’s just about drinking with people and letting themselves get intoxicated. In his process of thinking, Mingyu gets flashbacks of his own life.

  
  


_He’s drinking whatever is shoved in front of him. A faceless person comes to him and whispers sweet nothings in his ear. They coax him into swallowing a pill, promising them that it would make him feel better. Mingyu doesn’t care about anything and swallows the pill along with his drink. Mingyu’s head feels light and voices start to echo around him. They all start to sound like indistinct whispers. The world starts spinning or maybe it’s his head that’s actually spinning. The bass from the music booms in his ear and bodies clash in front of him. Someone’s lips are on his ears and then they meet his own lips._

_Mingyu can’t comprehend what’s happening. The pretty neon lights vary rapidly in brightness and blind his eyes. Then someone is making him drink again. Someone’s weight is on his lap and Mingyu feels trapped. He wants to go home, but someone’s tongue is down his throat. He tries to push away, but a switch clicks inside him and he pins that person down on the couch and ravishes them, trying to take everything from them. It’s a mess and someone else joins as well. Bodies rub together and Mingyu’s nose is overwhelmed by the combination of strong perfume and sweat. Everything starts to blur to nothingness._

_“Mingyu?” A voice penetrates his ears. The voice is so soft, gentleness curved around its edges._

  
  


“Mingyu!”

“Huh?” Mingyu comes back to reality and watches Junhui’s face. It is filled with so much concern.

“Are you alright?” Junhui’s voice drips with so much regard for his well-being. Mingyu wants to kneel down and cry. This man has no idea who he is. Yet, he is worried about him. Mingyu _doesn’t_ deserve the goodness of this man. He knows this very well. But his heart wants what it wants. 

“I’m sorry,” Mingyu tries to shove the hazy memories down and focus on the only man who’s real at the moment. “I think you’ll like the honey beer, hyung. It will be sweet just like you.” He finishes with a wink. A pretty blush blooms on Junhui’s cheeks. Mingyu hears a new melody ringing inside his head. 

“God, you two are literal couple goals!” Seokmin comments from the side. Junhui, who had been staring at Mingyu as well, is affected by his words. It feels like someone threw cold water over his head. He turns to Seokmin and vehemently shakes his head.

“We _aren’t_ together!” Junhui chokes on his own words. His eyes are wide with panic and something tugs inside Mingyu’s heart. Mostly, the question rings loudly around him - _why aren’t they together?_

“Really?” Seokmin looks equally shocked.

“Yeah, we only met each other today.” Mingyu supplies a better picture of their situation. 

Seokmin looks positively baffled. It looks like he’s offended that Mingyu and Junhui aren’t together. A hope flickers inside Mingyu’s chest. Maybe this is how it happens. Maybe this is how Mingyu finds himself walking on the path of redemption. _Through Junhui._

“I am sorry for offending you in any way! I just thought–” Seokmin looks away and tries to regain his thought process. “Beer! Do you have any preference?” 

“Something strong and intense, but also sweet and lively,” Mingyu says after thinking for a bit. He thinks he hears Junhui whisper _‘like me?’,_ but turns around to see him observing the bottles on the shelves. 

“Okay! Barley wine it is! I’ll be back.” Seokmin leaves to get them their drinks. 

Mingyu looks at Junhui, who is lost in his own world, humming some song without a care for his surroundings. 

“Hyung! I feel like this is going to be the best week of my life.” He says with an excited grin. Junhui just looks at him with an amused look of his own and nods. 

Mingyu can’t seem to comprehend how time passes by. They drink more beer and order hamburgers. As the minutes go by, the place gets more crowded and Seokmin gets busier with his bartender duties which completely works for Mingyu as he gets Junhui’s complete attention. He learns about his favourite colour, his preference in music, his hobbies, his education, his family, but most importantly, what made him come to Buenos Aires alone.

“For once, I just wanted to do something all by myself. I’ve always been, I don’t know how to word it, _sheltered,_ I guess. I needed to be alone.” Junhui says with so much thought in his words. It tugs something inside Mingyu’s chest. 

“But you’re not alone right now,” Seokmin says as he walks towards them while drying a beer glass with a cloth. It makes Junhui bark a dry laugh. 

“My friend is right. I’m incapable of being alone.” Junhui admits meekly. 

The way Junhui speaks his mind, it feels like he’s trying to lighten up a heavy topic. The sense of freedom is very important to Junhui and he might have struggled his whole life to even achieve this little trip. Mingyu’s heart aches for the older man. If it were up to him, he would let Junhui run free. If only he could make Junhui his, he would let him live the way he wants and deserves. 

“You know, technically you’re doing all this alone. I mean, you met me by your own fate. You didn’t meet me through someone else. It’s you, hyung. _All you.”_ Mingyu tries to reassure Junhui. The latter nods wordlessly. His mouth is set in a grim line. 

“You know what? We’ve been out for long. Let’s go back and rest, okay?” Mingyu suggests because he can’t handle the stuffy atmosphere anymore. Junhui just nods again. Mingyu hates his stiff reactions.

“Hey! You’re leaving?” Seokmin rushes towards them when Mingyu calls for the bill. 

“Yeah, it’s been a long day,” Mingyu replies.

“I understand. You know, I know it’s sudden, but I like you guys and would like to hangout with you when I’m not working!” Seokmin’s smile comes off easy and Mingyu realises that maybe the world isn’t filled with selfish people. “My friend dropped off tickets for a football match. It’s on Monday. You can have two of them,” Seokmin hands Mingyu two tickets. Everything is in Spanish, but Mingyu can read _‘Super Clasico’_ written in bold over it.

“I hope you can make it!” A server comes to them with their bill. Mingyu watches Junhui place some bills inside. 

Mingyu exchanges numbers with Seokmin as Junhui steps outside and tells him he has to make a call back home. 

“You really like him, don’t you?” Seokmin asks, but he’s not looking for an answer he already knows. Mingyu just sighs dreamily. 

“You know, don’t take this the wrong way, but I recognised you a while back. You’re Jade,” Seokmin says with a careful tone. Mingyu flinches, but before he can deny that, Seokmin continues. “It’s okay. Your secret is _safe_ with me.” There is a pause in his speech. “From what I can gather, Jun hyung is taking a big leap of faith in trusting you. If you see this ending badly, then don’t pursue it.” 

It feels strange. Seokmin sounds like his voice of reason. Mingyu completely agrees with Seokmin, who at the end is just another stranger. He knows he should be honest with Junhui. But a bigger part of him wants Junhui to fall for Mingyu, _not_ Jade of SVT. 

“Don’t worry. I haven’t known him for even a day, but I know that I won’t be able to live with myself if I end up hurting him. I’m not a very big believer, but meeting him feels like serendipity,” Mingyu confesses as he watches a couple sitting a few tables across from him. They look completely lost in each other and Mingyu wants what they have with Junhui. He wants, he wants, _he wants_ so much more than he has.

He walks out of the establishment and watches Junhui talk a little animatedly on the phone. It is so amusing, but comforting at the same time to watch the man act natural. Mingyu knows he was the one who suggested calling it an end of the day, but he hopes they can still talk once they reach the apartment.

After Junhui finishes his call and they get into an Uber to take them home, Mingyu tries bargaining for more time.

“Hyung? If I asked you how daring you were, on a scale of 1 to 10, what would you give yourself?”

“Hmm, probably 6 or 7,” Junhui turns to look at him. “What is going through your mind?” 

“I saw a kiosk near the apartment. Let’s buy some beer bottles and the first one to pass out has to dye their hair!” Mingyu challenges. He looks at Junhui eagerly, hoping the latter will indulge him. He will dye his hair if that is what it takes. He just wants to find an excuse to spend more time with him and not just sleep as they reach the apartment. Junhui eyes him suspiciously for a long time until he relents.

“You’re on.”

They buy a crate of beer and red hair colour. They run towards the apartment and settle down in the living room, their laughs echoing in the autumn wind. Instead of sitting on the sofa, they sit on the plush carpet, surrounded by beers and chips. 

“Okay, I don’t want to sound generic, but ‘never have I ever’ is a good way to get drunk,” Mingyu says with a teasing grin.

“Fine by me, although I don’t understand why you want me to get drunk. I don’t think your intentions are nice, Mingyu-sshi.” Junhui states in a tight voice. Mingyu panics because he doesn’t want to come off as some kind of sexual predator again. 

“Have a little faith in me, hyung,” Mingyu whines and pouts and looks at Junhui with puppy eyes. He watches the latter melt instantly.

“Okay, I get it! Now ask your question.” Junhui gestures with his hand.

Mingyu thinks for a question, but then he realises, he doesn’t want to play it seriously. He wants to uncover Junhui’s darkest secrets, but he is willing to be patient at the moment. 

“Never have I ever had sex.”

Junhui gives him a dead look.

“Are you kidding me? Are we 16 year old boys or something? Is the topic of sex supposed to be scandalous for us? This is stupid!” Junhui complains with furrowed brows. 

“You either drink or not, hyung. It’s simple.” 

“Fuck you!” Junhui takes a large gulp from his bottle. Junhui licks his upper lip to get the spilt drink and Mingyu forgets who he is for the moment. 

“Right! Never have I ever drank beer.” 

“Hyung, that’s ridiculous! Where is your creativity?” 

“Oh, sorry, are you saying something because I can’t hear anything,” Junhui replies airily while rolling his eyes. Mingyu takes a long swig of his drink after eyeing Junhui bitterly. 

“Never have I ever had a threesome.” 

Junhui doesn’t reply straight away. He looks at Mingyu like he has said the most scandalous thing he’s ever heard of. 

_“No?”_ It sounds like he’s questioning the weight of that word. He pauses, then looks at Mingyu as if he’s seen a ghost. “Wait, have you?”

Mingyu coughs a little and tries to not think about the unwanted ghosts plaguing his memories.

“You can’t repeat a question, hyung. Your turn.” 

Junhui takes a while to come back to his senses and drinks water instead of beer to calm his nerves. 

“Never have I ever been in love.”

Mingyu thinks about it hard. Has he ever felt strongly for another person that he could word it as love? He’s written a lot of songs about love, suffering and longing, but has he truly _experienced_ any of it?

“I don’t think,” Mingyu sounds like he’s choosing his words carefully, although it’s more like he’s trying to understand how that is really possible. “No, I haven’t.”

“It’s not a bad thing, Mingyu-yah. You’re young. Nobody’s opinion should change you. You shouldn’t feel guilty.” Junhui tells him so lightly and Mingyu thinks he’s right. It’s so easy being with Junhui. Everything just comes naturally, like they are meant to understand each other. It’s like they are two different rivers and they are meeting together to form a confluence. And they look so magnificent, flowing together side by side in harmony. 

“I don’t think you’re drunk,” Mingyu comments as he gets up and walks to the kitchen to fetch two big glasses. 

“Neither are you,” Junhui says as he leans back on the foot of the sofa. Mingyu pours his and Junhui’s remaining beer in two glasses and hands one to Junhui. 

“Whoever finishes last dyes their hair. Bottoms up?” Mingyu raises his glass in the air.

Junhui gingerly reaches for his glass and looks at Mingyu with a blank look. Mingyu feels like he is _drowning_ in the depth of his eyes. They are dark and full of secrets that Mingyu wishes to uncover. 

“Bottoms up.” Junhui pushes his glass forward in the air. Mingyu follows his action and clinks their glasses together. Mingyu brings the glass to his lips and tilts it upwards. He lets the smooth beer coat the inside of his throat and gulps it rapidly, trying to breathe through the nose simultaneously. There is a horrible burn inside his stomach and he grimaces through the after-effects.

He slams the glass on the table and looks at Junhui. The latter hasn’t even had a single sip of his drink. In fact, he has this _fond smile_ on his face as he watches Mingyu struggle with the horrible feeling kicking his brain. He places his unfinished glass on the table and gives Mingyu a cocky grin.

“Oops. I guess I lost,” Junhui sings as he gets up to help Mingyu stand up. He guides Mingyu towards the bedroom and the latter wants to protest that he can sleep on the sofa instead. But everything starts to turn a little hazy and Mingyu realises he is about to lose consciousness. 

Before he truly succumbs to sleep, he wonders if he really won or lost the whole game.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> all kinds of feedback and kudos are treasured!  
> if you have any questions, you can always hit me up on [twitter](https://twitter.com/redsyub) or [curiouscat](https://curiouscat.me/redsyub)! <3


	3. Day 2

Junhui stirs awake with a horrible crick in his neck. He sits upright and curses himself for sleeping on the sofa. It would have been better if he slept on the carpet instead. The morning sun is gentle and kisses his skin warmly. Even if his body aches because of his poor sleeping posture and there is mild soreness in his tendons, he is content with his situation. 

The feeling that he has inside his chest, it’s electrifying. It burns through his skin and bones and leaves behind a pleasant tingling that makes him feel alive. He _freezes_ without Mingyu’s presence and then under his burning gaze, he _melts_ like an ice. He feels like there is no air to breathe and he is _drowning_ in passion.

Junhui feels like he is the golden and barren _desert_ who has been thirsty for so long. And Mingyu is the big blue _ocean_ and he wants the younger man to enclasp him. 

He stands up and grabs the hair colour and walks towards the bathroom. Mingyu is sleeping soundly and he lets him have the needed sleep. 

It’s a good thing that he bleached his hair last week. But the process of dyeing the hair is enervating. Junhui readily lost last night because Mingyu has black hair and it wouldn’t have come out nicely on his hair. Plus, he wanted the younger to win because he was so eager and cute. 

After an hour of dyeing and showering, Junhui leaves the apartment to get some breakfast. Before heading out, he fetches his medicine kit and places the painkillers beside Mingyu. If the latter were to wake up with a splitting headache, he hopes they might help him.

He sticks to buying simple medialunas and coffee from the nearby cafe and walks back to the apartment. He comes back to find Mingyu somnolent, struggling to keep his eyes open. But as soon as his eyes land on Junhui, he’s wide awake. Junhui tries to school his amusement and places breakfast on the kitchen counter. He knows Mingyu must be affected by the new look he is sporting. Junhui never knew that the cherry red hair could actually suit him so well. 

Mingyu trudges towards him in a daze and cards his fingers through Junhui’s hair. The latter is caught off guard and he gasps because of Mingyu’s daring action.

“Hyung. You did it. Fuck, I’m–” Mingyu is left stupefied by Junhui’s visuals. 

Junhui stands still as Mingyu combs his fingers through Junhui’s hair. After appreciating his hair, Mingyu’s eyes fall down on his face. Their eyes meet and Junhui’s breath hitches. All he can hear is the rapid beating of his heart. It is so _loud_ that he is sure Mingyu can hear it too. Mingyu’s eyes travel downwards and land on Junhui’s lips. Junhui can see the _fire_ reflected in Mingyu’s eyes. They are standing so close and it would be so easy to just lean forward and give Mingyu the thing he’s been _craving_ since yesterday. He’s not sure, but it does feel like Mingyu is slowly inching closer to him. Junhui panics because it doesn’t matter if he wants it or not. He can hear Wonwoo’s voice from last night, chastising him for taking things too fast. He needs to take a step back.

“I think we should have breakfast now,” Junhui whispers. Mingyu freezes and Junhui can see the utter panic creeping upon his face. It’s at that moment that he realises that they _both_ are idiots. 

“Ye-yes. I’ll just come back in a few minutes.” Mingyu says and then runs towards the bathroom. 

Junhui takes a few deep breaths and composes himself. The hour hand on the clock hasn’t even crossed 12 in the day and he has already managed to fuck up somehow. He needs to reevaluate his decisions and choices in life. 

Mingyu comes back out with a more composed state of mind and they have breakfast together. 

“You know, tango originated here in Buenos Aires, so I guess we should pay tribute to that fact and go for a dance class. Only if _you_ want,” Mingyu phrases his suggestion in a way that feels like a question. Like he’s thrown the ball towards Junhui’s court and it’s up to him whether he wants to hit it back or not. 

“I mean, I don’t mind.” Two men performing the dance of sexuality and expression. What could possibly go wrong?

“Okay, so first, let’s go and hangout in La Boca, make our way back to San Telmo and join a dance class and then go to Recoleta and end the night there. Sounds good?” 

Junhui can only nod. It’s not like he has any better ideas for the day. Plus, he likes to indulge Mingyu as much as possible. 

La Boca looks like it came out from an artist's vision. With its picturesque and colourful streets, Mingyu’s hands are glued to his camera. Junhui thinks that photography could be his passion, a profession that he couldn’t pursue because of his job. He doesn’t know much about cameras, but staying with Wonwoo taught him about a thing or two. Junhui is sure that _Leica_ is an expensive brand and a common person will _only_ invest so much in a thing if they have a true passion for it. But then, he isn’t so sure if Mingyu earns well or not. In retrospect, he _doesn’t_ know much about Mingyu at all. 

Mingyu also clicks a lot of Junhui’s solo shots. The latter has completely given up on the urge of denying the younger man and now presents Mingyu with different poses to keep the man satisfied. 

“Should I click your picture as well?” Junhui asks. Mingyu lets the camera hang off his neck and looks at Junhui thoughtfully. He’s wearing a simple black boho shirt and cream trousers. Along with his sunglasses, Mingyu looks like he _belongs_ in a place like this. Junhui doesn’t even know if he could pull off the bohemian fashion, but Mingyu makes it look so easy. 

“Sure! Here, I’ll teach you.” Mingyu says as he removes the camera’s strap from around his neck and hands it to Junhui. The latter carefully inspects the device before he feels Mingyu’s hand snaking around his shoulder. Junhui’s breath hitches before he realises that Mingyu is trying to teach him to use the camera and there is no other intention behind the closeness. But he still _feels_ so much more.

“Here, I’ve clicked the automatic setting, so you don’t need to worry about it. Just look through the viewfinder and if you like the shot, then click this button. Easy?” Mingyu says. Because of their position, all the words are delivered directly to Junhui’s ear and the husky voice makes butterflies flutter inside his stomach. He can only take a huge gulp and nod. 

Turns out, clicking a picture is easier than Junhui expected and his pictures come out nicely.

“Wow, hyung! You’re good.” Mingyu pulls away and Junhui misses the warmth which is _ironic_ because it is a hot day. 

“This is fun!” Junhui declares. Mingyu poses against the art surrounding them and looks almost like a professional. It’s like Mingyu has been modelling for a very long time and all of this comes _naturally_ to him.

Suddenly, a scrumptious aroma wafts through the air and Junhui turns his head to find its source. He sees a vendor making the famous beef empanadas in one of the stalls lined up beside the street. Junhui can’t properly appreciate the art and beauty of the city, but he can surely appreciate the delicious food with the flavour bursting inside his mouth and filling his heart to the brim.

“Enough photography, it’s food time now!” Junhui says as he pulls Mingyu by his arm towards the stalls. 

  
  


~•~

  
  


Their lunch basically consisted of trying as many small-bite local specialities as possible. The food was delicious, but Mingyu was content by just watching Junhui enjoying himself. They walked beside each other while absorbing the vibrant art surrounding them. 

Mingyu knows that his fate is playing a cruel joke on him by torturing him to stay near Junhui _without_ really having him. Maybe he should thank the burning sun and the bustling atmosphere around them that is hiding his impatience. He is sweating a bit and his eyes are moderately hidden by sunglasses. If Junhui were to really pay attention to him, the elder would realise that Mingyu’s eyes are dark with desire and constantly fixed on him. The major cause behind Mingyu’s perspiration is the struggle to hold back his yearning for the other man. Their hands knock against each other from time to time and Mingyu _yearns_ to just grab the other man’s hand and intertwine their fingers. It would be warm and clammy, but Mingyu _wants_ that.

Another cruel joke that fate decides to play on him is having to witness spontaneous tango flash mob dance in front of him, not just once, but _twice._ The worst part of it all is that Mingyu is finally facing the reality that he is about to perform such intimate moves with Junhui in a very short time. Mingyu is about to combust from the anticipation of getting to hold Junhui close. And, he won’t be even crossing any lines because the other man is _aware_ of what’s about to happen. They both are diving into it with knowledge and consent. Mingyu is so happy that he thinks he could shed a few tears.

Funnily enough, his happiness doesn’t last for a long time. He takes out his phone to check for directions and notices a few message notifications popping up from none other than his manager and friend, Xu Minghao. 

  
  


**Minghao Xu**

** Minghao Xu [14:13]: **

So I checked with your hotel and guess what they told me?

** Minghao Xu [14:46]: **

I’ll cut to the chase Mingyu

I really don’t care what you do there as long as you remain inconspicuous

But we had a deal and you were supposed to keep me in loop

I am giving you exactly 12 hours

If I don’t receive a response then I’m informing the company that you are missing

Don’t blame me later if your name comes up in the headlines and then American and Argentinian police along with the INTERPOL is on the lookout for you

  
  


He knew Minghao was going to contact him soon once his manager realised that he had checked out the hotel without informing him. He chooses to ignore the messages for now, but he knows that he’ll have to respond to them by the end of the day. He just hopes Minghao understands his reasons and doesn’t start _psychoanalysing_ his relationship with Junhui. 

They go back to their neighbourhood and find the dance studio. It’s a queer tango demo class and thankfully, other than Mingyu and Junhui, only another gay couple and two lesbian couples are joining the class. It’s a good thing because Mingyu is absolutely sure he would embarrass himself one way or another and he wants a very small audience to witness it.

Mingyu isn’t necessarily a bad dancer. He can dance if someone asks him to dance, but there is a reason why he’s a musician and not a dancer. 

“Hyung? Do you dance often?” Junhui tilts his head up a little to face Mingyu. Their eyes meet and Mingyu vaguely clocks that the lights of the studio _flicker._

“I used to when I was an undergraduate. But I’m no professional.” Junhui replies with the same smile that Mingyu knows has some mischief _hidden_ behind it. He hopes he’ll be alive by the end of the class.

“Alright, everybody! Hello! My name is Dominic and this is my partner Hernan. Is everyone comfortable with English?” The instructor asks and everyone replies positively. They both are dark-haired, but Dominic is taller and Hernan has curly hair. The participants are asked to stand in pairs and follow the lead of the instructors.

“Tango embodies _sexuality_ and _expression._ It generally follows a leader-follower pattern where the leader gives the direction and the follower responds to it. Let’s start with some distance. You need to be familiarised with your partner's leg movements before you let your instincts guide you in the close embrace.” Dominic says.

“Have you all decided who’s gonna take the lead?”

“You lead,” Junhui whispers.

“Are you sure?”

“Are you scared that you won't be able to handle me?” Junhui challenges with a smirk.

“We’ve decided,” Mingyu yells his answer towards the instructor while maintaining eye contact with Junhui. 

“Good! Now first, face your partner and bend your elbows with your palms held outwards. Connect your palms and let there be a gap in between. Now, watch our leg movements.” Dominic says as he stands in the appropriate position with Hernan. He sees them move their feet forward and back while keeping their hands joined together. 

“The follower mirrors the movement of the leader. Easy? Let’s give it a try!” 

Mingyu takes a deep breath and holds out his hands in front of him. Junhui follows him and joins their hand. Mingyu takes another breath to compose himself because they are finally _touching_ and the electricity is travelling through his nerves. He tries moving his feet back and Junhui moves his feet towards him. As Dominic said, it’s like mirroring each other’s movement. There is a considerable gap between them and Mingyu thinks this is fine. As they increase their pace, their legs clash and Mingyu almost trips back. Thankfully, Junhui pulls him on time. Mingyu’s body twitches in Junhui’s hold and he quickly tries to find some distance between them by jerking back. _Distance._ He needs distance to function properly and not do something ridiculous.

“Thanks.”

“Be careful, Mingyu-yah.”

Mingyu ignores the butterflies in his stomach and continues moving his feet. When Dominic deems that all his students are partially used to their partner’s movement, he beckons them to move closer.

“Now, the follower will place their palms flat on the leader’s chest in a crisscross pattern, like this, yeah?” Hernan places his hand and it’s like he’s trying to push Dominic away. “This way, we have increased the closeness. We’ll repeat the leg movements now, on the count of three,”

Junhui places his hands the way he’s instructed to. They are closer and Mingyu gets to see Junhui’s pristine face up close. His face is dotted with moles at these perfect little places and makes him look so beautiful. Mingyu believes that Junhui just keeps getting prettier and prettier as time passes by. Even though Junhui is trying to keep some distance between them, the _pull_ is stronger than ever and Mingyu wants more.

Mingyu’s heart beats faster and he can’t even hide behind his pretentious expressions anymore. Even if Junhui can’t hear the beating of his heart, he can surely _feel_ it. He feels exposed like he’s getting cut by a knife and all his layers are starting to shed one by one. Mingyu hopes this makes the other man _realise_ the effect he has on Mingyu and probably do something about it. 

They both move around and it’s more difficult than before as they have to depend more on their instincts rather than eyes. They both step on each other multiple times and Junhui just laughs it off. His unrestrained laugh is precious and Mingyu can’t help, but join him even if internally, he’s dying from embarrassment.

“Good, good! You’re all learning well. Now, let’s move on to stage three.” Stage three consists of holding each other’s upper arm. There is a distance between them, but it’s almost _negligible._ As Dominic instructs them to move again, Mingyu’s eyes meet Junhui’s. They are glassy and dark and his lips are slightly parted. He also notices a faint blush on Junhui’s cheeks and ears. One might think it’s because of the overbearing heat, but the air conditioning of the studio is ideal and pleasant cool air surrounds them. 

_Good,_ Mingyu thinks. They both are equally screwed because their combined desire is _overflowing_ in a public space. Why did he ever think that Tango, _a sensual dance,_ would be a good activity for them?

The movement of Junhui’s feet is easier to gauge now that Mingyu is used to the routine and they barely trip over each other. Hernan, for a change, starts to spew some stuff about sensuality and chemistry and Mingyu feels like he’s digging his own grave.

“Okay, I think you’re all ready now. Hold your partner in a close embrace and let the magic of tango sweep you off your feet.” 

Mingyu gingerly places his right hand on the back of Junhui’s waist, tacitly _asking_ for permission. Junhui swings his arm over Mingyu’s shoulder and tightens his grip, silently _giving_ permission. Junhui’s right hand meets Mingyu’s left hand and they both interlock their hands. As Mingyu thought, it’s warm and clammy, but it’s _exactly_ what he wants. The warmth is balmy and thaws his soul.

“Mingyu-yah, focus.” Junhui chides and Mingyu comes back to the earth.

The instructor tells them that it’s okay if the couple wants to dance in an open embrace for starters. But Junhui has plastered his body against Mingyu’s and the latter does not wish to part away from him. They move, but it’s mostly Mingyu’s feet moving on autopilot. Hernan suggests that if the follower is comfortable enough, they can raise their leg up at the end of a routine, but he does not push it. People aren’t supposed to naturally have amazing flexibility according to him and that is completely fine. 

Mingyu sees a _flame_ reflected in Junhui’s orbs and by the end of their current routine, the elder flicks his leg up, till his foot is raised above his head. His knee does not even bend and Mingyu sees a _vision_ of Junhui’s flexibility being used in another scenario that gets a reaction from his dick. He hears someone whistling appreciatively from behind him. Something takes over him as a _green_ feeling settles deep inside his stomach. As Junhui lowers his leg with grace, Mingyu tightens his grip and turns them around, so he can shoot daggers at everyone who dares to even approach Junhui after this. 

After things tame down a bit, they both start to enjoy the dance and ignore everybody else. There is something about gazing deeply into another’s eyes while letting the tantalising music guide you. Junhui is like a _cat,_ luring Mingyu into the darkest of alleys in the middle of the night and the younger man knows about the danger and risks, but instead of running away, he gets _more excited_ for the unknown. It’s a chase. Junhui follows Mingyu’s directions. Mingyu follows every single shift in Junhui’s body.

Junhui is an exquisite creature and Mingyu decides the moment he has the elder pressed to his body, his heavy breathing sounding like a seductive melody that he wants to _keep_ him. By the end of their session, they are sweating, yet Mingyu’s body feels energetic. 

He’s danced with hundreds of people before, but nobody has been able to make him forget his own identity. Mingyu can only concentrate on Junhui at the moment. His broad shoulders, his tiny waist, his cherry-red hair, wet from sweat, his perfectly sculpted face, his eyes that somehow hold the galaxy, his flexible body, his gentle touch, his caring nature, his lips that Mingyu desperately wants to taste. 

Mingyu imagines how it would feel if his lips were cushioned by Junhui’s lips, moving lightly against each other in harmony while a silent conversation from one spirit to another transpires. Mingyu _wants_ to taste. 

“Mingyu?” 

Mingyu flinches and comes back to reality. The class is dispersing and Junhui looks at him with a blank expression. Mingyu fears Junhui’s poker face the most because he can never understand what is going on in the other man’s mind.

“Yes?”

“Click a picture of my lips. It’ll last longer.” Junhui suggests airily. It makes Mingyu blush furiously. He does not want to answer and incriminate himself further because he already has almost twenty five shots of just Junhui’s lips in his camera roll. 

When Mingyu stays silent, Junhui says, “You already have,” It’s not a question, more of a statement. Apparently, Junhui can read his mind now or maybe Mingyu really can’t hide his feelings in front of Junhui anymore. 

A notion floats around Mingyu’s head. It’s comical now that he thinks about it. He wanted to run away from all the ghosts of his past because they were ruining his sanity and destroying him from within. But he ended up meeting Junhui. Every single thought of the man is _consuming_ him. Although he feels like walking towards the path of redemption, the thought of losing Junhui sets his whole world on fire. He finds himself _haunted_ yet again.

  
  


~•~

  
  


“Ah, Mingyu-sshi? Cemeteries aren’t exactly an ideal romantic date place.” Junhui says as they navigate their way towards La Recoleta Cemetery. Unsurprisingly, Mingyu freezes.

“D-date?” Mingyu’s eyes are wide and his cheeks are faintly flushed. Junhui would think it’s the heat, but he knows it’s the _insinuation_ behind his words that dusks the younger’s face in peachy hues. 

“Relax. I’m just teasing you.” Junhui retracts his statement although a voice in his head screams that this is exactly how two prospective lovers hangout. Junhui will never willingly do the tango with one of his _‘bros’._ He can still feel Mingyu’s hands on his waist. Even with his clothes on, his touch left a _burning_ sensation behind. His fingers itch to hold back Mingyu’s hands. He wants to feel every single atom in his body jump for him. 

They turn the corner towards Vicente Lopez street and Junhui sees a really big brick wall. He knows that the cemetery lies behind the walls. Truth be told, Junhui knows a lot more about the country than he wants Mingyu to believe. He is not some oblivious idiot who decided to travel all the way to Argentina on his own without researching the place first. But it is gratifying to see Mingyu taking on responsibility and steering the wheel. Mingyu is clearly trying his best to make this whole experience a memorable one for Junhui. And whenever he compliments Mingyu or lets him know how grateful he is to have met the other man, he gets this _glow_ on Mingyu’s face that reminds Junhui of a very beautiful lamp or the sun. But the sun is a little unrealistic and people have always died trying to chase it so he’ll stick with the pretty lamp. 

That glow on Mingyu’s face leaves Junhui wanting for _more._ So much more than he has ever wanted before. He wants to keep him for as long as possible, or until the end of this trip where he can pretend to escape real life and play this make-believe with Mingyu.

“What if I want to think this is a date?” Junhui hears Mingyu almost whispering his words. Junhui has to turn his face to gauge Mingyu’s expression. The latter is already staring at him with earnest eyes. 

“Then make me feel special.” Junhui knows he’s spewing bullshit because Mingyu has already been making him feel so special since the moment they met. And with his comment, he is just making Mingyu fluster, but the younger looks at him with a determined look. Before Junhui knows what’s happening, Mingyu reaches for his hand and folds them over. His fingers lace with Junhui’s and their palms _kiss._ The way their hands easily fit together, like they are two halves of a whole, is so surreal. 

“Is this okay?” Mingyu asks apprehensively. Junhui looks into Mingyu’s dark brown eyes. There is a flame burning in his eyes.

“Yes.” Junhui is at a loss of formulating a witty reply because his heart is beating erratically. Mingyu grins happily in response and his kind eyes turn softer. Junhui thinks he’s _achieved_ something monumental. 

The moment they step inside the massive wrought-iron gates of the cemetery, it feels like they have entered a whole another place. The locals call it _‘City of the Dead’_ and Junhui finally understands why. There are city blocks, tree-lined main avenues branching into smaller streets and narrow alleyways. The tombs show a great variety of architectural styles and he is left in awe. The place is filled with intricate statues that have some kind of deep symbolism behind them.

Mingyu focuses on getting good shots through his camera while holding some sense of decency and respect for the dead. He also keeps informing Junhui about the history of some significant mausoleums, reading the information from his phone. Junhui hums and nods, barely paying attention to his words. In reality, his thoughts are all over the place. 

There are many mausoleums that are in great shape and well-maintained. Junhui can enjoy the beauty and appreciate the work put in constructing the magnificent structures. But then there are some that have fallen in disrepair. There are broken glasses lying around and with the passage of time, some coffins lay exposed. The horrifying thing is Junhui _unintentionally_ catches glimpses of what remains of the decayed corpses. 

A Latin phrase he read a few years ago rings in his mind. It also rings because he read it etched on a few mausoleums. _Memento mori –_ Remember that you will die. A sense of morbidness surrounds him as he walks slowly, following Mingyu. The other man hasn’t noticed the shift in his mood and Junhui is glad. It sounds a bit silly, but Junhui has always been better at handling himself alone. 

Junhui has never had many opportunities to do activities alone. Since the time he could remember, he has always had someone standing beside him. His wealthy background never really helped him in trying to seek the _freedom_ he desperately desired. So whenever his mood takes a drastic change from the norm, he locks himself in his room and contemplates till he feels like he can function as a normal human being again. 

Still, he manages to detect a sensation of grandness and peace in the sacred place and he feels like paying his respect to every corpse buried there, telling them that they will always be remembered, even after their death. 

“Let's get out of this place,” Mingyu announces out of the blue.

“But we haven’t checked out the whole cemetery,” Junhui argues back. 

“Yes, but I think we’ve seen enough,” Mingyu reaches for Junhui’s elbow and starts pulling him towards the main avenue. Junhui thinks that Mingyu might have seen his grim expression and decided to bail out of the place. He plants the balls of his feet to the ground and in the process, Mingyu jerks back and halts his steps as well.

“If you’re doing this on my account, then don’t. I’m fine.” Junhui says. Mingyu wrinkles his nose and looks at Junhui with guilt.

“Hyung, promise you won’t make fun of me,” Mingyu speaks as he walks closer to Junhui. 

“But what if it is something that _needs_ to be made fun of?” Junhui immediately questions back. Mingyu gives him a dead look. When Junhui doesn’t react, Mingyu’s eyes droop and he starts pouting. And Junhui somehow succumbs to this new _weakness_ he has acquired and begrudgingly promises that he will not tease him.

“The sun is about to set and now that I think about it, I won’t be able to sleep if we explore more,” Mingyu admits shyly. 

“Are you scared?”

“You promised!” Mingyu practically whines. 

“No, it's a genuine question,” Junhui raises his hand to prove his intentions. “Let’s get out, okay?” Junhui grabs Mingyu’s hands and just like before, their hands fit perfectly together. He leads the way until they both are out of the cemetery. Junhui stops a little further away from the cemetery and looks down at his shoes. 

He wants to _voice_ out a lot of things. They mainly include things such as: how by just looking at Mingyu, he feels as if he is filled with air and floating from the exhilaration he feels. How he constantly thinks about little things that he learns about the other, even when the said man is beside him. How he willingly tries out new things to make the other man happy (he dyed his hair because he wanted to watch the other man happy from winning the bet, for crying out loud). How he already feels some kind of intense emotional union with Mingyu which is something Junhui has never felt with anybody else before. And he has no control over these feelings whatsoever. 

He knows it’s way too fast to be realistic, but at this point, he has accepted that this attraction towards Mingyu is biological. It isn’t about what he wants anymore. He _needs_ to have Mingyu as soon as possible. The thought of being with Mingyu is driving him crazy and he needs more and _more._

“Stay with me and you won’t be scared, I promise.” Junhui murmurs. In a way, he knows his words will be delivered in a way that sounds like Junhui means it for the week, but somewhere between those lines, Junhui actually means for a long time. He hopes Mingyu reads in between the lines and isn’t disgusted by the prospect. 

Mingyu squeezes his hands in return and Junhui _yearns_ for something more than just handholding. 

“Wanna walk around a bit before we grab dinner?” Mingyu asks. Junhui nods back and so, they walk the streets of Recoleta. He takes in the rich architecture of the place, a fusion between neoclassicism, gothic and renaissance, and enjoys the pleasant evening weather. 

“Mingyu? Do you remember anything from last night?” 

“Why? Did I do something?” There is a stutter in Mingyu’s voice. 

“Do you think you could’ve done something wrong?” Junhui counters.

“Hyung.” Mingyu implores and Junhui gets to the point.

“I haven’t been able to get past the fact that you had threesomes. Like I’m not disgusted. I’m just wondering that I don’t really know much about you.” Junhui confesses. Mingyu knows almost everything there is to know about Junhui. Or at least the basic information about his education and family background. Junhui is only aware that Mingyu has some kind of job and he only ever finished high school and he has a younger sister who he dearly adores, but fears that he might somehow corrupt her, so he stays away from her. Junhui cannot ignore the possibility that Mingyu might be some dangerous man even when he’s making him feel safer in a foreign country.

His _rationality_ is trying to seek for the right answers, but his _emotions_ are guiding him towards ambiguity.

A sly grin forms on Mingyu’s handsome face. “Are you imagining me naked?” Junhui breaks into a laughing fit in the middle of the street. People give him weird looks, but he can’t help it. Even though it's true that Junhui has imagined Mingyu in more steamy scenarios, the way the younger phrased his question is so funny. It sounds accusing when Mingyu is _equally_ guilty.

“You say it like _you_ haven’t already done that in your head!” Junhui accuses. Mingyu is taken by surprise and he looks down at his shoes. His ears are bright red. Junhui reaches for his face and pinches his cheeks to make him look up. 

“I’m not mad. I’m curious. Tell me about your job.” Junhui presses. 

Suddenly, Mingyu grabs his wrist and pulls him closer, crowding his space. The younger man looks at him with serious eyes. Junhui’s breath hitches, but he tries to rein in his emotions because he does not wish to participate in public indecency. 

“You’re not mad? You are a dangerous man, _Junhwi._ Do you even understand the things you do?” Mingyu is standing so close and he is practically growling in Junhui’s ears. The latter realises that this is the _first time_ Mingyu called out his name. His name sounds strange, but his name also sounds beautiful coming out of Mingyu’s lips. Like it _belongs_ there. Junhui wants to hear more. 

“You’re digressing and not answering my question, Mingyu.” As expected, Mingyu’s body sags and he sighs. He slowly pulls back his arms and body. Junhui didn’t realise he was clenching his own fists until Mingyu vacated his space. 

“I don’t like to tell people about my job because they always try to reap benefits off me,” Mingyu finally relents. 

“So you agree that I’m just one of the many people you meet on a daily basis?” Junhui counters with a raised eyebrow. 

Mingyu instantly panics and practically yells, “No!” Junhui just shrugs and waits for Mingyu to continue. 

“I am a manager,” Junhui expected some _groundbreaking_ reveal of a profession like a top-secret spy or even a model. He had all the rights to keep his expectations high after experiencing Mingyu’s suspiciously evasive behaviour. Junhui is sorely disappointed, to say the least. He wants to turn around and walk away because of the ridiculousness of the whole situation. Mingyu beats him to it.

“Of a fairly famous band. I’ve always been surrounded by this infamous musician lifestyle, that’s why I’ve done things. That’s why I know people around the world. That’s why–”

“Which band?” Junhui takes out his phone to search for them. Junhui is the least bit interested in listening to western musicians. He is guilty of being clueless about the trending artists. He is content with listening to Korean and Chinese artists and the occasional classical music. But he needs to know who this famous band is. If they have decent information about them, then he’ll let Mingyu have a pass and try to understand the difficulties he faced in his life. If they are not, he’ll _still_ try to understand, but first, he’ll try to stir up some drama and tease Mingyu a bit. 

Mingyu groans, but finally says, “Scarlet King.” Junhui quickly searches the band and finds out that they are quite popular. Mingyu is forgiven for now. 

“The bassist looks hot,” Junhui comments. Mingyu snatches the phone and keeps it in his own pant’s pocket. 

“Okay, this was also the reason why I didn’t want to tell you,” Mingyu mutters, but the suffocating atmosphere has dissipated and they both get back to the easy exchange of conversation. They walk and talk and Junhui learns how Mingyu has suffered a lot because of his toxic company. 

After an hour of walking aimlessly, they stop by a restaurant and eat the famous pizza which has a very thick and spongy base and is dripping in cheese that has crusted at the bottom as it is cooked in a pan. It is so heavy that they can only manage two slices each and pair it up with a bottle of Quilmes. 

Junhui is physically tired by the time they finish up and call for an Uber. It’s their second night together and Junhui _craves_ for a dramatic turn of events in their relationship. 

Junhui wonders what he has to lose anyway. Worst case scenario, Mingyu turns out to be one of the biggest mistakes of his life. He can easily cut him off by the end of this holiday and he’ll never have to see his face again. 

_Another_ worst case scenario, Junhui ends up falling irrevocably in love with Mingyu and by the end of this holiday, he wouldn’t know what to do with his life. 

He does not want to think about it at the moment. Not when he doesn’t even know what Mingyu tastes like. Though, he absolutely intends to _change_ that fact by the end of the night. 

  
  


~•~

  
  


When they finally get back to the apartment, Mingyu is physically tired. He is so tired that he instantly flops over the sofa and hugs the cushion. He lets his body sink to the soft material and enjoys the blissful release of tension from his muscles. Then he remembers everything that happened. He reaches for his camera and looks through the gallery to find the shots that Junhui took earlier in the day. Some of them are hazy, some of them lack focus, but most of them are remarkable and Mingyu sees himself through Junhui’s eyes. It feels too _intimate_ to see himself through the elder’s eyes. Mingyu puts away his camera.

Junhui walks out of the bedroom in a plain black T-shirt and track pants and he already looks like a vision. They wordlessly communicate and Mingyu stands up to change for the night as well. 

While splashing water over his face, Mingyu thinks a lot about the events that happened throughout the day. His heart sinks deep inside his chest when he thinks about how he _knows_ what it feels like to have Junhui in his arms, hold his hands, know his inherent scent, to feel him so close, but not truly have him. Mingyu has never _yearned_ for someone so terribly. It’s a novel experience that Mingyu does not want to have. Every single flighty word of Junhui leaves a deep metaphorical gash on Mingyu’s body. 

It is so easy for Junhui to carelessly say things like _‘stay with me’_ and _‘make me feel special’_ and he doesn't even care about how Mingyu feels. Maybe he shouldn’t care. They are bound to get separated by the end of this vacation anyway. Junhui might just be looking for a summer (even though it’s autumn in Argentina) romance and Mingyu just happens to be the perfect candidate. But Mingyu is a _fool_ and he would volunteer to be that candidate for Junhui in every single scenario. Mingyu is very deep in his feelings. Maybe all of this is just madness taking control.

As he finishes up and steps out of the bathroom, he hears the faint sound of piano echoing from the main hall. It’s a familiar piece and Mingyu has heard it before. He faintly remembers spotting an upright piano at the corner of the main hall. But he was under the impression that it didn’t work as vines were growing over it and it was placed just for aesthetic purposes. 

Mingyu drops everything and rushes towards the hall. In the corner, beside the big window, Junhui sits on the duet piano stool and plays the piano with his deft hands. Junhui looks _grand_ while sitting in a regal posture and pressing the keys like it’s child’s play. Mingyu hears the piece and tries to dig into his memory for the name of the song.

“Marriage d’amour.” Junhui speaks as he halts his playing and turns around to look at Mingyu.

“Huh?” Mingyu is still trying to recover from the knowledge that Junhui is a talented pianist. It’s truly _fate_ that brought them together. They fit perfectly together – _a guitarist and a pianist._

“The name of this piece. Do you know anything about classical music?” Junhui asks with an amused expression. Mingyu believes there is no harm in telling the truth about his love for music. He walks towards Junhui and asks if he can sit on the stool by pointing at the space beside Junhui. Junhui scoots towards his right and Mingyu takes a seat, facing opposite the piano, and looks at the rest of the apartment.

“I was a guitarist in the Studio Band in high school. I guess it’s safe to say I know my classical music sheets.” Mingyu quips and turns his head towards the left to look at Junhui. 

“Then can you play the piano?”

“I can play the chords, but I can’t play like you. _Guitar,_ on the other hand, is a part of me.” 

Junhui starts playing the piano again. Mingyu instantly recognises the piece, ‘Liebesträume no. 3’, which is a song about unconditional mature love. The music flows in the room and Mingyu’s fatigue is replaced by serenity. 

“Hyung, your fingers create magic on the piano.” Mingyu muses absently, lost in another world. Junhui chuckles silently and his fingers falter, but it doesn’t ruin the atmosphere and he continues playing. 

“When I was in school, my friend and I wanted to start our own band. He decided to learn guitar and I asked for a grand piano for my birthday. We both diligently practised for almost a year. But when it really came to starting the band, we got busy with college entrance exams and then it kind of became a lost dream.” Junhui’s fingers reach the keys for the lower register and his arm brushes with Mingyu’s body. But Mingyu is at _peace_ and he doesn’t feel the persistent feeling of lust taking over him. 

“I didn’t know this piano worked,” Mingyu says. He is lost in the music and not thinking straight, so he leans his head sideways and places it on Junhui’s broad shoulders. His shoulder is softer than the bed and Mingyu instantly feels so comfortable and safe.

“Neither did I. Thankfully, someone had put up string covers so it hasn’t rusted much and is in decent shape.” Junhui stops playing, then starts playing another piece, ‘River flows in you’.

“You’re very talented and know a lot about music. You’re like a _dream_ that I don’t ever want to wake up from.” Mingyu has no filter over his words and doesn’t realise what he has said until Junhui stops playing again. When the realisation _dawns_ upon him, he panics but doesn’t move his head from Junhui’s shoulder because this way, he can hide his face which has surely turned red from embarrassment.

“I think you should kiss me now.” 

They both don’t move for a few moments. Junhui is sitting still with his fingers resting on the keys. Mingyu is leaning on Junhui trying to analyse if Junhui is being serious or teasing him again. The room is silent and the lights are dim. But his heartbeat is so _loud_ and it’s all that he can hear until the static in his bones becomes louder and the white noise numbs his sanity. 

“Wait, _what?”_ Mingyu jerks back up and turns his head to look at Junhui while the latter does the same thing. There is not an iota of amusement on his face. He looks deadly serious. 

“I know you want to.” 

If only Junhui knew that Mingyu wants so much _more_ than just a kiss. 

“No!” Mingyu protests and instantly regret it because Junhui’s face withers and he starts getting up. Mingyu places his hand on his shoulder and pushes him back down. Junhui’s eyebrows bunch together and he glares at him. 

“I mean, I want to hyung. But I don’t want you to feel obligated to me,” 

“You think I don’t want this?” Junhui’s silvery voice echoes in the room. 

“Hyung–” Junhui doesn’t let him finish and interrupts him.

“Mingyu? You either kiss me or let me go.” 

After that, Mingyu doesn’t think. He straight up dives for the thing that has him possessed from the beginning of their encounter. The lips that are meant to be _kissed._

It’s a rush of adrenaline as Mingyu leans in while one of his hands wraps in front of Junhui’s stomach, trying to hold on to something. Junhui is soft. Softer than velvet. He wants to know if his lips are softer than his body. 

Junhui is looking at him with his big eyes and Mingyu can see his desire reflected back in the elder’s eyes. Mingyu raises his right hand and gently strokes Junhui’s jaw, eliciting a sensual gasp from him. Mingyu wants so much, but he needs to ask one last time.

“Hyung,” Mingyu is whispering. They are so close and it feels so intimate. Mingyu has never felt this way before. “I’m going to kiss you now.”

Instead of replying, Junhui wraps both his hands around Mingyu’s neck and pulls him in. 

Their lips press together and Mingyu literally feels a metaphorical _firework_ going off behind him. His lips are firm, but soft at the same time. Mingyu moves his lips and kisses Junhui, feels him, drinks him in and kisses him again. 

Mingyu wants to hold Junhui completely. He wants Junhui to crush him into dust and then have the elder cover his body completely with every single particle of Mingyu’s essence. But at the moment, he’ll be satisfied with Junhui’s weight _grounding_ him. So he starts tugging him in which makes Junhui break off the kiss and look at him quizzically.

“Come here,” Mingyu’s voice is hoarse. He is ruined. Junhui quickly understands his intentions and stands up, only to clamber onto Mingyu’s lap making the latter groan from the weight. Mingyu wraps his left arm around Junhui’s waist and moves his other hand backwards to grip the piano for support which makes the low notes _echo_ in the room. 

Junhui is warm and Mingyu is unbothered by the temperature outside because he likes this warmth. It feels like he’s yearned for this _warmth_ all his life.

“You are good with your lips. I want more, Mingyu-yah,” Junhui’s voice is like the sweetest melody Mingyu has ever heard. The melody from the previous night at the bar plays again in his head. Mingyu wastes no time and pushes Junhui’s body closer to him. 

Junhui is kind to him even with his kisses. He wraps his arms around Mingyu’s shoulders and holds the younger one down by his body weight. But he lets Mingyu do most of the work while he leisurely moves his lips against Mingyu’s. Mingyu is more than eager to just feel Junhui, get used to this wonderful closeness. It’s soft and moist, just their lips moving against each other until Junhui pokes his tongue out and licks across Mingyu’s lips. 

Mingyu opens up, their tongues meet and Mingyu feels a second metaphorical _firework_ going off behind him. Their tongues twist together and Mingyu licks in everything that Junhui gives. With his tongue, he can feel more, taste more, drink in more and Mingyu is drunk. _Drunk off Junhui._

Mingyu’s back is killing him. He wants to savour Junhui, but he can’t do that if he is bothered by the unease of his own physical presence. So he dares a little and places his hands on either side of Junhui’s thighs. Unlike his whole body, his thighs are well-fleshed and beautifully muscular. Mingyu already loves them. He dips his fingers into the meat of the elder’s thighs and Junhui lets out a low whine. An animal _roars_ inside Mingyu.

“Hyung, I’m gonna pick you up,” Mingyu announces because he wants the other man to be prepared. Junhui instantly leans back and shakes his head, trying to shun Mingyu’s plan and get off his lap. 

“No, I’m heavy. I’ll mov–” Junhui never gets to finish his train of thoughts and he lets out a _squeal_ which honestly, sounds adorable to Mingyu. The latter stands up while trying to grip the elder’s thighs tightly and Junhui braces himself while laying his head on Mingyu’s chest, trying to hold on to Mingyu’s shoulders with his arms. 

Mingyu has only one thing on his mind and that is to manoeuvre around the apartment without dropping Junhui on the floor. His _tunnel vision_ helps and he safely drops Junhui on the bed. The latter falls with a groan and looks at Mingyu with hooded eyes. Mingyu looks at his slicked lips which are _blooming_ because of Mingyu’s caress. Mingyu spots the two moles and all reasons are lost.

He leans down and plants his left arm above Junhui’s head while he brushes his fingers against the elder’s jaw lightly. He is trying to calm himself, but he also wants to calm Junhui because they are both breathing harshly and their faces adorn shades of red. Mingyu rests his forehead on Junhui’s and closes his eyes. He feels so much and he wants more, but this time, he doesn’t hesitate to voice it.

_“More,”_

Junhui’s right hand snakes around Mingyu’s neck and he readily connects their lips again. Sweet and moist, sweet and moist, sweet and moist. Mingyu is addicted and he can’t let go. The chemicals are bursting inside his nerves, taking the message to his brain and telling him that _this_ feels so good. With this closeness, Mingyu finally has the freedom to take in the rich scent of Junhui. Honey, musk and patchouli. 

“Junhwi, you’re so gorgeous, it’s unreal,” Mingyu says as he breaks the kiss to breathe and fill in his lungs with the air that Junhui breathes. He _breathes_ in Junhui. He’s at peace even when his body is swimming in chaos. 

“My name. Say it again, Mingyu,”

Mingyu gives in so easily. He breaks the kiss and maps all the moles on Junhui’s face and neck with his lips while simultaneously calling out his name. Junhui’s name comes off his lips and it feels as if he's _known_ this name all his life. Studied, practised and memorised it. _Junhwi._

Junhui’s moans drive Mingyu crazy and his legs twitch uncontrollably. Mingyu pulls up one of the elder’s thighs and kisses him again. Lost in the clouds of pleasure, he doesn’t even realise he’s grinding his hips down until Junhui pushes on his chest and makes him break the kiss.

“I think that’s enough for today.” 

Junhui looks wrecked. He is breathing heavily, his torso is heaving, his body has a layer of sweat, his face is red and his lips look kissed. _Kissed by Mingyu._

Mingyu pulls his body away and rolls down beside Junhui. He finally realises his condition is very similar to Junhui’s as he has to put conscious effort in breathing. 

As Mingyu comes down from his high, he turns his head to look at Junhui who is already looking at him. Now, Mingyu is finally aware of the fact that Junhui tastes so sweet. It’s a _blessing_ and a _curse_ at the same time. A blessing because he thinks he can get more out of this. A curse because he shouldn’t crave for more. Junhui deserves honesty which Mingyu isn’t providing. Junhui doesn’t deserve a liar like Mingyu. 

“You regret it,” Mingyu voices his assumption.

“I don’t. I liked it. In fact, I wanted more,” Junhui sits up and looks away from Mingyu. “But I believe that people only have sex right after kissing for the first time when it’s a casual hookup of some sorts. Call me old-fashioned, but I don’t just want to have sex for the sake of having it.” Junhui looks back towards Mingyu and crosses his legs on the bed.

“I get this feeling when I’m with you, that I have _known_ you and then, somehow I’ve _forgotten_ about you. And now, I’m relearning all these familiar things about you. I might sound like an impractical fool, but I can’t seem to comprehend that you might be a fleeting presence in my life.” Junhui ends his monologue with a peal of empty laughter. 

Mingyu gets up and reaches for Junhui’s hand which is occupied with messing up the sheets. The elder flinches for a second, but easily gives in and lets Mingyu intertwine their fingers. 

“You have no idea how glad I am that you feel the same way. I feel like I’m chasing after you even when you're right in front of me and it kills me, but I keep it to myself–”

“Don’t keep things to yourself!” Junhui berates him. 

“I’m scared you’ll _leave_ me!” Mingyu raises his voice out of desperation.

After that, they both grow silent. Nobody speaks for a while. Mingyu wants to say a million things, but he’s already revealed his biggest insecurity. Junhui finally takes a deep breath and speaks.

“It’s only our second night together and look where we are. We still have five days together. Let’s not rush the heavy conversations. We’ve still got time. For now, let’s just sleep.” Junhui pulls his hand and gets up from the bed. He starts walking towards the bathroom and Mingyu follows to get up as well. Junhui abruptly stops and looks back with a confused look.

“Where are you going?” 

“You should take the bed tonight. I’ll go and sleep on the sofa.” Mingyu informs him. 

“Don’t be ridiculous. It’s a big bed. I know we are tall, but the bed is big enough.” Junhui tells him. Mingyu tries to argue, but Junhui is an adamant man and Mingyu finally relents and lays down on the bed.

As Junhui excuses himself for a few minutes, Mingyu grabs his phone and opens his messages. He can’t _ignore_ the reality for too long. 

  
  


**Minghao Xu**

** Me [23:47]: **

I’m safe and still in Buenos Aires so you don’t need to worry.

Instead of replying back, Minghao instantly calls Mingyu and the latter declines the call. He can’t talk to Minghao with Junhui lurking around. 

  
  


**Minghao Xu**

** Me [23:49]: **

I can’t talk. Only text

** Minghao Xu [23:50]: **

Where are you?

** Me [23:50]: **

San Telmo

I’m staying at a friend’s apartment

** Minghao Xu [23:51]: **

What friend?

Why do I get this feeling that you found someone and now you think you’re gonna end up marrying them 😪

** Me [23:53]: **

** 😶 **

Why do you always have to rain on my parade?

** Minghao Xu [23:53]: **

Not again Mingyu Kim!

** Me [23:54]: **

Okay but it’s not like every other time!

He’s different

He doesn’t even know who I am!

He thinks I’m some unknown Korean-American

** Minghao Xu [23:56]: **

He’s lying

** Me [23:56]: **

He’s not

He’s from Korea and doesn’t listen to western music

** Minghao Xu [23:57]: **

Ok then you’re lying

Look do whatever you want

It’s your free time

But stay away from trouble

And at least send me one ‘I’m alive’ message every day

The conditions aren’t negotiable

** Me [23:59]: **

Yes got it

I’ll message

Now I’m going

Bye

  
  


Mingyu locks his phone and replays his messages from Minghao in his head. Even the latter told him that _technically,_ he’s lying to Junhui about his identity. But for the first time in his life, he’s met someone who wants him as Mingyu, _not_ Jade of SVT and it's such a satisfying feeling.

Mingyu finally feels that he’s not as bad a person as the media paints him out to be. Mingyu wants to savour this feeling for as long as possible. At the end of the day, he’s only lying about his identity. Not once has he pretended with Junhui about anything else. He hasn’t been this real with someone in so long. 

“Just to be on the safe side, I’m gonna put a body pillow in the middle. Don’t cross the boundary. Okay, Mingyu-yah?” Junhui sweetly calls his name while placing the pillow in between. It’s childish, but Mingyu has no right to complain.

“Yes, hyung.”

After a long time, Mingyu sleeps with a light heart and a smile on his face. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> fun fact! junhui actually knows how to play [marriage d'amour](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EFJ7kDva7JE). he played it in going seventeen ep 16 - diamond edge in north america and there is also a pre debut video of him playing it when he was young. the other two pieces, [river flows in you](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7maJOI3QMu0) and [liebesträume no. 3](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MBOa-2b4uQQ) are generally considered romantic piano pieces and the latter one is my personal fav!
> 
> all kinds of feedback and kudos are treasured!  
> if you have any questions, you can always hit me up on [twitter](https://twitter.com/redsyub) or [curiouscat](https://curiouscat.me/redsyub)! <3


	4. Day 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i just want to preface this by saying this fic is rated explicit not just for the sexual content but also for the mature theme it contains. it is essentially a psychologically driven work. i feel like there may be some scenes in this chapter or maybe even in the upcoming ones which may trigger someone in the wrong way. i have mentioned the main tags but if you still think there is something that needs to be tagged then please let me know.

It’s a new dawn and Junhui wakes up to grey clouds covering the sky. It rained when they were sleeping and now cool winds brush past his skin. Mingyu sleeps peacefully on the other side and the body pillow stays securely in the middle. He’s relieved to find that somehow they didn’t end up cuddling at night. 

He realised quite late that everything is moving too fast. Granted that Junhui _wanted_ things to move fast before, but now he wants time. Time to understand and hold Mingyu before succumbing completely to his fiery desires. Before he lets the inferno lick up his walls and spread like wildfire, crumbling everything down to the ground. 

Junhui looks at Mingyu’s peaceful sleeping face one last time before he gets up, grabs his phone and walks out of the bedroom. He makes himself a cup of instant coffee and sits down on the dining chair. After taking a couple of sips and letting the caffeine do its magic, he calls Wonwoo. The latter picks up after the seventh ring.

“Hello?” Junhui hears the muffled sound of the bass in the background. 

“Where the fuck are you?”

“Not important. Are you alright? Is that creep still living with you?” 

“I asked you something _first,_ Wonwoo! If you tell me, then I’ll tell you,” Junhui informs Wonwoo sternly. 

“I’m at a club,”

“With who? Or are you alone?”

“Argh! Chan and Seungkwan,” 

Junhui _knows_ Wonwoo is lying. Before calling Wonwoo, he casually browsed stories on Instagram. He knows the other two boys are having dinner with their other university friends. Seungkwan and Chan are their childhood friends. They all lived in the same neighbourhood and Wonwoo practically raised the three boys. Yes, Wonwoo _also_ raised Junhui because as a foreign kid, it was hard for the latter to do things on his own.

“Really? Put one of them on the phone then.”

_“Junnie,”_ Wonwoo is pleading, but Junhui is getting irritated.

“No, Wonwoo! You get distressed about every single thing I do in my life and I’m not allowed to know what you’re doing? That is unfair and also extremely selfish of you! I care about you, too and it’s _my_ fucking business to know about you! So tell me.” Junhui raises his voice and then instantly regrets because Mingyu is sleeping in the bedroom. He hopes the younger man wasn’t woken up by the noise.

“Fine, I’m here with Yeowoon hyung,” Yeowoon is Wonwoo’s toxic ex-boyfriend who only dated him for his family’s money. Junhui wants to berate him so badly, but Wonwoo speaks up again. “But I swear I’m about to leave. I don’t know what I was thinking, but I regret it now. I just–” Wonwoo stops his rambling abruptly and sighs. Junhui _wishes_ he could be near him and take the man in his embrace. He knows Wonwoo is going through something, but he can’t physically be with him and provide him comfort.

“It’s okay, Wonwoo. Take a few deep breaths for me. Breathe in, and out,” Wonwoo follows Junhui’s guidance. 

“I miss you, Junnie.” Wonwoo finally speaks. His voice sounds far off and Junhui’s heart aches. Suddenly, he feels guilty for _trying_ to seek freedom. He feels guilty for _chasing_ his selfish dreams for once. He feels guilty for giddily _falling_ for another man. Junhui feels tears _pooling_ in the corner of his eyes. 

“I miss you. I’m so sorry for not being there. Tell me what’s bothering you, Wonwoo.” 

“No, I can't. I’ll tell you when you come back.” The bass is fading away and Junhui supposes that Wonwoo is walking out of the club. 

“I’ll fly back on Thursday night which will be Friday morning for you and reach Seoul by Saturday evening. Do you think I’ll be fine till then _knowing_ that something is bothering you?” Junhui asks. 

“Then let’s not talk about this! Let’s talk about the _creep._ Last time you called me, you both were going back to your apartment from a brewery. What happened yesterday?” Junhui sighs. He wants to desperately find out what’s troubling Wonwoo, but the latter is a stubborn idiot. And there is no point in trying to extract information when they are thousands of kilometres apart. Junhui reluctantly lets the issue drop for now.

“We kissed.”

“Moon Junhwi, I swear to god, I told you not to do one thing and you did that one thing!” Wonwoo sounds like a tired father of a troublesome kid.

“But _Wonwoo,_ he’s adorable and hot at the same time! I couldn’t resist. Although, I did stop when things started to heat up, so be proud of me!” Junhui whines and slams his hands on the table. Then he flinches and controls his emotions. He really needs to keep his volume down. 

“I’m disappointed in you.” 

“Wonwoo!”

“Do you even know who he is?” 

“Yes! And, I can’t tell you because it’s a secret.” Junhui leans back in his chair to look inside the bedroom from the open door. Mingyu is still lying down on the bed, hopefully, sleeping.

“Is he a spy?” Wonwoo deadpans. Junhui breaks into a burst of quiet laughter. Wonwoo, after a while, joins in as well. At the end of the day, they are two people who’ve stayed with each other through the highs and lows of life. They obviously share the same thinking process as well. They might argue and fight from time to time, but their bond is _unbreakable._

“No. Wonwoo, I want to talk to you about something else.”

“What?”

“Do you believe in destiny and soulmates?” Junhui asks meekly. He can’t even believe what he’s saying. Wonwoo stays silent for a moment. 

“You believe he’s your _soulmate?”_ Wonwoo’s voice is coloured with disbelief. Junhui starts scratching the corner of the table with his blunt nails. 

“Not really. I mean, in hindsight, you and I are soulmates because we get each other. With Mingyu, I feel a connection that is _deeper_ than just understanding each other,” Junhui confesses.

“Mingyu? So, he’s Korean?” 

“Wonwoo, focus!” Junhui whines again. He really needs the other man to understand the predicament Junhui is going through. 

Earlier, Junhui just wanted Mingyu. But now that he knows the taste of the other man, knows how eager the other man is with his own desires, knows that he will stop if Junhui asks him to, knows that he eerily feels the same way as Junhui, he’s positive that want has turned into a desperate need. Junhui _needs_ Mingyu. 

“Well, you know I’m not a big believer. But I know you do believe in fate and destiny. If you feel some cosmic powers brought you two together, then you know I will support you,” Wonwoo says in his serious, deep voice that signifies that Wonwoo isn’t clowning him anymore. “But Jun-ah, I won’t hesitate to end this man’s life if he hurts you.”

Junhui knows that Wonwoo’s threats aren’t empty. They both come from rich families. They haven’t made a name for themselves, but they still walk around with a name. And with that name, comes some prerogatives. Junhui does not want to entertain those thoughts at the moment. His _soul_ tells him that Mingyu wouldn’t hurt him. He just can’t. 

“Where are you?” Junhui tries to deviate Wonwoo’s attention from his love life. 

“I’m just walking down the streets of Itaewon.”

“You left the club?” 

“Yeah. Your call saved me from committing a big mistake, so thank you.” Wonwoo's voice sounds sincere. Junhui’s heart still aches because he knows Wonwoo is in some kind of pain. He feels helpless and he hates this feeling. 

“I love you, Wonwoo.” 

“Yeah, you too.” Wonwoo prefers to always be _difficult_ when Junhui tries to have a heart to heart chat with him.

“Say it back!”

“Fuck off!” 

After that, it is easy to break into laughter again. All the heavy feelings are aired out and they both laugh heartily. Junhui almost falls off his chair. Although, as soon as he spots Mingyu standing in front of him, he stops laughing and collects himself. 

“Ah, Wonwoo, I have to go,” 

“Is it because of the creep? Put him on the phone, I want to speak to him.” Wonwoo demands.

“Don’t be ridiculous! Talk to you later. Bye!” 

Wonwoo says a bunch of things, but Junhui doesn’t hear it because he pulls the phone away from his ears and ends the call. Then he looks at Mingyu. He looks like someone who was forced to eat a very sour lemon, something that Junhui enjoys but knows is despised by the majority of the human population. Junhui tries to recall what he said to Wonwoo during his call that could have pissed Mingyu off. He comes up with nothing.

“Ah, good morning, sunshine!” Junhui tries to smile, but he knows his expression must be screaming his discomfort because he literally doesn’t know what he did wrong.

“Hyung? Do you have a boyfriend back home that I don’t know about?” Mingyu finally voices his question and Junhui experiences a _whiplash._ The question is fucking preposterous and Junhui is frankly a little _offended_ that Mingyu can even imagine the notion that Junhui is playing with him or something. 

“You think that was my _boyfriend_ on the phone just now?” Junhui raises his voice because of the incredulity of the situation. 

“Am I wrong?” Mingyu sneers while his eyes are round with something Junhui fails to understand. Is it anger? Jealousy? Mingyu is being _stupid._

“You are sorely mistaken, Mingyu-sshi.” Junhui stands up, abandons his coffee on the table, and walks towards Mingyu with hooded eyes.

Mingyu is taller and broader than Junhui and it arouses the latter. But something about him makes Junhui want to subjugate him. Junhui has never been interested in the power dynamics of a relationship, but then Mingyu isn’t like the rest of the men that came in his life. Everything about Mingyu is different and Junhui loves change. Junhui _craves_ spontaneity and he _loves_ to put Mingyu on a spot. 

As expected, with Junhui’s mild intimidation, Mingyu instantly melts, all his anger strips away and his face dons an expression of uncertainty. Junhui wants to kiss him and then he remembers that he _can_ kiss him. 

Without thinking for another second, Junhui walks into Mingyu’s space and places his hands on Mingyu’s shoulders. He has to stand on his tiptoes to reach Mingyu’s height and he finds his balance by gripping the latter’s shoulders tightly. 

“Are you done?” 

“I’m sorry.” Mingyu sounds remorseful and Junhui doesn’t like that. He wants Mingyu to be cheerful and a little careless.

“So I can kiss you now?” Junhui asks while slowly licking his lips. He watches the lump in Mingyu’s throat bob down and back up. 

“Hyung, I haven’t brushed my teeth,” Mingyu meekly replies.

“And what about it?” 

_“Hyung,”_ Mingyu whines to protest further. 

“I think we _should_ kiss because if I end up being disgusted by your morning breath then we should just stop this,” Junhui gestures with his hands. He thinks if they aren’t compatible enough then they should stop their relationship or whatever Mingyu wants to define it as. 

“What? _No!”_ Mingyu wraps his hands around Junhui’s waist and pulls him into a heated kiss. Junhui _ascends_ to paradise. It’s like he wakes up in a dream and he’s flying, his whole body lifting off his feet. 

Mingyu’s hands are just a tad bit smaller than his but they still completely wrap around his tiny waist and his touch _sears_ through Junhui’s T-shirt. Under the misty skies, he lets their desires manifest. Junhui opens his eyes to look at Mingyu. The angle is off and he can hardly make out anything, but Mingyu looks like he’s holding something _delicate_ and _precious._ His hold is strong and hot, but his kisses are gentle and passionate. 

Junhui can’t seem to get enough of Mingyu. Their lips press together then part away. They breathe in each other and then repeat the process again. Junhui _pushes_ his body against Mingyu and the latter _pulls_ him in. They stand together like a single entity, unwilling to break apart.

Mingyu spins them around and pins Junhui to a wall, decorated with multiple frames of paintings. They all shake from the impact but somehow manage to stick to the wall. Now Junhui _pulls_ him in as Mingyu _pushes_ in further. Junhui feels hotter than fire and Mingyu is taking him higher. It’s the way Mingyu tastes that Junhui can’t seem to get enough of him. Mingyu’s scent baffles him. As he breathes him in, he smells bergamot and cardamom and then it mellows into something altogether woodier and sweeter and Junhui is addicted. He wants _more._

“Are you disgusted?” Mingyu asks as his lips migrate down south towards his collar. Mingyu darts his tongue out and licks the skin there before he lightly bites it and then sucks on it. Junhui lets out a lewd moan that makes Mingyu tighten his grip on his waist. 

“No. I’m addicted,” Junhui whispers and screws his eyes shut, letting the pleasure take over his senses. 

Mingyu drives Junhui slowly out of his mind and leaves him in a perpetual bliss. Mingyu comes back up for more and Junhui tangles his fingers in Mingyu’s hair. His hair is silky soft and Junhui tugs them and hears Mingyu groan into the kiss. He loves it.

“I really love this,” Mingyu says in between the kisses as he gasps for air. “I could kiss you all day and all night,” 

_All day. All night._ Junhui feels the same. It’s so easy. Their lips are like two opposite poles of a magnet, attracting each other with a force that is incomprehensible to him. They fit together so seamlessly. Junhui truly believes that he’s _known_ Mingyu in another life and this is the exact reason why everything about him is so _familiar._ Even his kisses are familiar when in reality it’s a new experience. 

“Mingyu?” Junhui grips the other man’s shoulders and pushes lightly.

“Hmm?”

“Let’s go out,”

“Wow, you wanna make out in public? I knew you were kinky,” Mingyu winks at him and goes back to kissing him. Junhui slides his hand down Mingyu’s side, till he reaches his hips. Then he places his hand on Mingyu’s asscheek and squeezes it. The latter whimpers and Junhui smirks.

“If only you knew about my kinks, darling,” Junhui teases him by lightly spanking his ass and catches Mingyu off guard. Taking advantage of the situation, he pushes Mingyu off him and walks towards the table to fetch his coffee which has turned cold. 

“Get ready, Mingyu-yah! We are going to the flea market today!” Junhui informs him as he makes his way back to the bathroom.

He stands in front of the mirror and looks at the marks that Mingyu has left behind. They are red for now, but after a while will turn into purple. _Purple love._ Mingyu loves with a fierce passion, but he devours him slowly. He chooses to cherish every intimate moment like it’s their first and last. Junhui loves the red on his skin. It’s a beautiful reminder that Mingyu _was_ here, _is_ here and hopefully _will be_ here. 

  
  


~•~

  
  


As afternoon rolls in, the clouds fly away and the sun blazes through. Mingyu can’t seem to remember the person he was before coming to Buenos Aires. His evil ways, toxicity and urges all seem like a distant memory now. Minghao was worried, one might say even fucking terrified, to leave Mingyu unsupervised in a foreign country. It was partly because for the past three months, Mingyu has been under rehabilitation for drug abuse. He was scared that one way or another, Mingyu would _relapse_ and fall down the hellhole again. 

Mingyu has been so lost lately. For years, he was surfing over the clouds, high up in the sky. He thought he had everything when really, he had nothing. He was living life on the edge. He used to play with death and whenever he woke up, _still alive,_ he would end up taunting death. 

But when he took the decision to change his ways, things went downhill so fast, it was like he was falling with a very high velocity. For starters, he felt like he was _too old_ for everything. And the deep-seated realisation hit him that he had _no friends._ Everyone just used him for his name and fame. He was alone in between vicious monsters and he wanted to run away. If only life was easy and he wasn’t restricted by hundreds of obligations imposed by his label. 

He wanted to find himself, so he came to Argentina all alone, thinking he’ll be able to lose himself in the eclectic European architecture and rich cultural life. He has been doing that and enjoying himself a lot, but the major reason behind his happiness is none other than the _man_ who is residing under his skin. 

Perhaps the reason why Mingyu hasn’t had any urge for the poison is that his mind is already preoccupied with _Junhui._

It is kind of late to realise, but Mingyu can’t help falling in love with Junhui. Yes. _Love._

Junhui talks about fate and destiny and Mingyu has never believed in that. But maybe he should become a believer because it’s the only explanation. 

Two days back, when Junhui stopped him in the middle of the street to help him with his picture, Mingyu’s brain told him to run away, purely because he thought that maybe a fan had recognised him. But his instincts wouldn’t let him even take another step. His soul was telling him to help the stranger. And the moment his eyes landed on the stranger, the world stopped moving and his heart stopped beating. The rest is _history_ that Mingyu has stored carefully inside a box that is kept _hidden_ deep inside his heart. 

He is so happy. He probably believes he could die from all this happiness and not regret a thing. All because now he knows what it feels like to hold Junhui, touch Junhui, kiss Junhui. 

Yet, Mingyu thirsts for _more_ of Junhui.

After their morning tryst, they have a simple breakfast and then get ready for more sightseeing. They are about to leave the apartment for Feira de San Telmo when Mingyu notices that Junhui has no sunglasses or hat to protect himself from the sun. So he quickly goes inside the bedroom and grabs another hat. He hands it over to Junhui who looks at him quizzically.

“Hyung, take this.” Junhui eyes the hat with a distressed look on his face. 

“What?” Mingyu asks.

“It’s so ugly.” Mingyu tries to not take it too personally, but he is offended. Mainly because _one,_ it’s a beautiful Off-White hat and _two,_ how dare he call his godly fashion choices ugly? 

“Do you even have eyes?” Mingyu asks as he walks closer to Junhui and emphatically places the hat over his head. Junhui looks at him with his big brown eyes and Mingyu is able to see the night sky in the afternoon. 

“I find you attractive,” Junhui scowls at him. “Are you sure you want to insult yourself, baby?”

Mingyu is dumbfounded because what can he truly say here? Somehow, he always ends up with the short end of the stick. He really needs to accept that Junhui will always have the upper hand in their conversations. Strangely enough, he doesn’t mind.

“You’re right. The hat is ugly.” Mingyu gives in with a heavy sigh. Junhui tiptoes and leans in closer until Mingyu feels the former’s soft hair brushing his cheeks.

“Don’t feel bad. You really are so gorgeous, Mingyu. I can’t help but fantasise about _worshipping_ your naked body, caressing every single inch with my lips,” Junhui whispers in his ears. Mingyu instantly grips Junhui’s waist and lets out a shudder. “Do you think I’ll give up on that imagery to praise a _stupid_ hat?” 

“Hyung–” Mingyu wants, no, Mingyu _needs_ Junhui and this craving is incessant and crawling _deep_ inside his bones. He’s burning up from every word that drips from Junhui’s lips.

Junhui pulls away at a lightning-fast speed and Mingyu misses the warmth.

“Come on, I’m hungry. Let’s go!” Junhui walks out the door of the apartment and Mingyu is left in the middle of the living room. It’s a terrible thing that he is turned on at the moment and he can feel his imminent boner. So, he clenches his fist and lets all the blood flow towards his hands instead. He thinks about complicated and morbid things, just about anything as long as it’s _not_ about Junhui.

After a minor little delay, courtesy of Junhui and his blatant choice of words, they both walk a couple of blocks to reach the famous Sunday street market. The Plaza Dorrego is sprawled with stalls selling a variety of things from antiques to books. 

This is exactly the kind of thing Mingyu has wanted to experience since forever. To walk in a local market and experience the rich culture and admire the local crafts. Even indulge in buying them. It’s crowded and Junhui sticks closer to him, constantly holding his elbows just so that they both don’t lose each other. 

They both fill their stomachs with street food and fall in love with the scrumptious taste of bondiola. Mingyu takes his sweet time in every single booth and Junhui joins him patiently, gracing Mingyu with his gentle and sweet smile. They buy a lot of things, the only difference is that Mingyu is buying most of the things for himself while Junhui is buying things for other people. Mingyu isn’t envious, but there is a _hollow_ space in his heart because of the lack of close people in his life.

Mingyu talks to locals in English and broken Spanish and Junhui just stands behind and joins in with curt English replies. Junhui looks at him with a pensive face and Mingyu grows curious. He wants to know every single thought residing in the _boroughs_ of Junhui’s mind.

“What is it, hyung?”

“Your last name. I just realised I don’t know your last name.” Junhui speaks so softly in the loud, crowded place. Nonetheless, Mingyu hears him because Junhui always seems to be holding the centre of his attention.

“Kim, Kim Mingyu.” 

Junhui laughs. He laughs so openly and so easily. His laugh is like the _sweetest melody_ that Mingyu has ever heard. It feels like flowers are blooming inside his chest. His laugh is infectious and before Mingyu realises what’s happening, they are both laughing in the middle of the street. 

“It’s lovely to get to know you, Kim Mingyu. I’m Moon Junhwi.” Junhui says. Instead of shaking his hand, Junhui wounds his arms around Mingyu and they both hug. It’s their first platonic hug and Mingyu’s heart _still_ manages to leap out of his chest after all they’ve done.

Even when Mingyu’s mother tongue is Korean, he primarily thinks and speaks in English. He can’t even read Hangul properly. He wonders if his future generation will even get to learn Korean or not. He will carry on with a language that has never been spoken by his forefathers, the nativity _lost_ in between. But he looks at Junhui and realises the latter is also sailing in the same boat as Mingyu. He’s a Chinese man living in another country and speaking a different language. He starts to wonder if Junhui can easily read Chinese characters. But Mingyu digresses. 

After learning Junhui’s last name, the first image that comes to his mind is of the actual _full moon_ instead of _writing_ or a _door._ Junhui holds the _stars_ in his eyes. But he is the _moon_ personified. At night, he shines so brightly. Brighter than any other celestial body in the sky. If one were to look at the night sky, the stars surrounding the moon look dull in comparison. It’s a shame that the moon isn’t celebrated as much as it’s other relatives are just because it does not illuminate by itself. But Mingyu is willing to become the _sun_ in Junhui’s life who will shine all his light over Junhui and make him the brightest body in the sky. 

Junhui starts to pull back, but Mingyu tightens his arms around him. He does not care about the world around them. The only thing that _matters_ is the two of them in the centre of the universe. 

“Mingyu, we are in public.” Junhui pleads. Mingyu loosens his grip around him and lets them separate. He does, however, leave a chaste kiss over Junhui’s cheek because his heart is swelling with too much _affection_ for the elder. Junhui's face flushes into a shade of bright pink. He is embarrassed by Mingyu’s public display of affection and in retaliation, he lightly slaps Mingyu’s arms. He further pouts his lips and turns around and starts walking away from Mingyu to show his annoyance. Mingyu laughs uncontrollably, but stalks his way after Junhui, apologising in between. 

Junhui quickly forgives him and they both settle back to exploring the antiques from the different booths. By the time the sun starts dipping down and Junhui ditches Mingyu’s hat and stuffs it in with the rest of the stuff in one of the bags, the atmosphere of the market changes. The booths start clearing up to make way for music and dance performances. 

As Mingyu and Junhui start walking back towards their apartment, they watch tourists mixing with the locals. Mesmerising tango and flamenco music fills the square and everyone jumps to their feet. They are pulled in by the locals with bright smiles and they join people and dance. Mingyu accompanies a mature and joyful lady while Junhui dances along with two teenagers. It’s fun and invigorating and they all shout in unison when the routine ends. 

Mingyu catches a samba band marching towards them and people stand on the sides of the street to let them pass and enjoy their art. On the other corner, a seductive flamenco dancer woos the audience with her nimble footwork. Mingyu is enthralled with so much going around him. Junhui shifts closer towards him and whispers in his ears.

“Is that woman’s dancing sexier than mine?” 

Junhui feels like playing again, but Mingyu refuses to become a victim of having an unprecedented boner in the public. So he decides to play in return. 

“I don’t think I remember your dancing very well.”

“Is that right? How about we change that?” 

Mingyu shifts a little closer. “Are you trying to suggest something?” It’s definitely a novel experience to be the one _asking_ the question instead of _suggesting_ something. Junhui catches on to Mingyu’s thought process and smiles. 

“Actually, yes,” Junhui pulls him by the elbow and they start walking again. “Let’s go to a nightclub.”

“Are you serious?”

“Why wouldn’t I be? Let’s dance all night and lose ourselves to the music. Plus, I’m curious about Argentinian nightlife. Come on, it’ll be fun.” Mingyu has been staying away from any kind of _‘nightlife’_ since he went into rehabilitation. He believes that the neon lights and the bass booming from the speakers will evoke memories that might give him goosebumps and a craving for _something_ he’s trying to forget. 

Mingyu, like any other kid, had always chased after the American dream. Nobody ever warned him that the American dream was a killing machine. He was _dying_ from the inside when he thought he was doing all of it to feel more _alive._ It was a classic example of situational irony. He actually feels his nose burning and his instincts drive him to sniff and press his knuckles on his nose. 

Junhui looks at him expectantly. Mingyu knows he still has these urges, but he also knows that Junhui is with him. And he will _rue_ the day when Junhui witnesses his dark side. Mingyu reminds himself that he is a free man and not a slave for the drugs. He will sacrifice anything for the sake of having Junhui near him.

“I’ll go anywhere as long as you’re by my side, Junhwi hyung.” Mingyu looks at Junhui with a glint in his eyes. Junhui rolls his eyes in return and walks forward.

“What am I? Your bodyguard?” Mingyu laughs.

“If anybody gets to be someone’s bodyguard, it would be me, hyung. You’re small.” Mingyu jokes as he catches up to Junhui.

“Don’t think too much of yourself! You’re only tall by what? Two inches? I don’t _need_ your protection.” Mingyu can’t see Junhui’s face from the back, but there is an edge in his voice. He then remembers a vague conversation he had with Junhui and Seokmin in the bar. Junhui thinks he has always been sheltered and he wants to be more independent.

“You’re right. It’s you who needs to save me.” Mingyu murmurs and looks at his shoes while walking. They have almost reached their apartment. Junhui unlocks the door and pulls Mingyu inside. The elder pins Mingyu to the stair walls and kisses him with a passion that is a little difficult to comprehend.

“I don’t know about your past and you don’t know about mine and that’s _fair._ But as long as you’re with me, I won’t let you think about your past. Focus on me, yeah?” Junhui cups Mingyu’s face with his hands and presses kisses to his cheeks _tenderly,_ stroking the mole on the left side of his cheek. Mingyu feels overwhelmed. 

It’s like this – there is a hole inside his chest and he wants to fill it with gunpowder. Then he wants to ignite it with the love that has started to throb for Junhui and let those feelings _burn_ inside him till they _explode_ in a show of flames and combustion. And just like a phoenix, he wants to be reborn as a new man. _A better man._

Junhui grabs his hands and intertwines their fingers. Then he pulls him up the stairs to their apartment. Mingyu doesn’t realise, but they are laughing again over something that he can’t seem to remember. It is so _easy_ with Junhui. Their playfulness and laughter echo inside Mingyu’s head and at the end of the day, all of it is worth it. And suddenly, his _past_ seems stranger than a stranger.

  
  


~•~

  
  


Junhui wants to look good. He already knows that he is blessed with good looks, but tonight he is on a _mission._ But obviously, things aren’t meant to sail so smoothly. Junhui didn’t exactly bring his leather pants or sheer shirts. It didn’t seem important at the time, but now he deeply regrets it. He came up with the plan to go to a nightclub on a complete whim. He can’t even _understand_ what possessed him at the time, but he’s just too curious to see Mingyu in a different light. He wishes to uncover each and every _mask_ that Mingyu wears and find out who he really is.

Although Junhui will admit that there is something _strange_ about wanting to know Mingyu more. He is a naturally curious man and it’s perfectly fine to be inquisitive. But he feels like this curiosity of his is like a seed of a _toxic fruit_ he shouldn’t dare to eat because the seed will stick to his throat and put him in danger of getting choked and ending his life.

Steering clear of his morbid thoughts, he somehow settles for a plain black T-shirt and dark denim and tops it off with a casual jacket. Mingyu comes out of the bathroom, dressed in his clothes and for a few, _very long,_ seconds, Junhui doesn’t know how to react. 

He’s wearing tight-fitting trousers and a sleeveless shirt. The thing is, half of it is unbuttoned and Junhui can easily feast his eyes on Mingyu’s _godly_ torso and neck. Junhui wonders how did he end up so lucky to be desired by such a _beautiful_ man. Junhui wants to cancel whatever they plan on doing and stop resisting. He wants to push Mingyu on the bed, crawl over him and have the younger’s hands roam all over him. But obviously, Junhui can’t openly show his desires because that’s boring.

“Please button up your shirt. We are grabbing food before hitting the club and I refuse to dine with a man who has his tiddies out.” Junhui deadpans as he sits on the bed to lace up his shoes. 

“You don’t like what you see?” Mingyu asks and Junhui can hear the smugness in his voice.

“I’m not looking,” Junhui says. He gets up and starts walking out of the room without sparing a glance at Mingyu. Apparently, Mingyu does not like to be ignored because he grabs Junhui’s wrist. Before Junhui can understand what is happening, Mingyu has him pinned to the wall beside the door. 

“Then why don’t you _look,_ hyung?” Mingyu’s glance is provocative and Junhui knows that everything that Mingyu has put on display is all for him and _only him._ He squeezes his eyes shut. The thing is, he can close his eyes and choose to not see things, but he can’t close his heart and ignore the feelings bursting inside his chest. 

Junhui has been feeling a lot of emotions since he met Mingyu. It’s a mix of adoration, lust and maybe exhaustion. His feelings tire him out mentally. But somewhere deep in the labyrinth of his feelings, he has found something that he honestly thought was hidden _too deep_ to even dig out. This is exactly what terrifies him. 

Junhui sees a future that is so _blurry_ that it’s practically laughable and stupid. In the visions, he’s laughing. It’s unbidden and carefree. He’s running bare feet on the soft, dewy grass. The sun is bright, but it doesn’t even prick his skin. The winds are cool and pleasant. The air brings with it the peaceful smell of bergamot and cardamom. Junhui slows down his pace and then stops running. He flops down on the grass on his back and looks at the sky. The strong rays of the sun don’t let him open his eyes, but then someone walks up to him and provides him with the much-needed shade that helps him open his eyes. 

Mingyu looks down at him with gentle eyes and a fond smile. He’s glowing _brighter_ than a flame even when the sun is behind him and Junhui raises his hand to reach out to him. Mingyu complies so easily and gets down on his knees. He sits upright and cups Mingyu’s face while the latter places his hand on his lower back. It’s a rush of all the _good feelings_ and it’s amazing. He’s warm and happy. He wants it. He wants to hold on to this _forever._

He should’ve really predicted that their conversation in the museum was supposed to be _foreshadowing_ of his helpless future.

Junhui’s eyes are still closed when Mingyu leaves an innocent kiss over his left cheek, exactly where his mole lies. It’s so soft and innocent that Junhui wants to cry. He opens his eyes and looks at Mingyu who’s wearing a completely different expression now. It’s the _same face_ from that ridiculous blurry future. 

It’s the face that he wants to _love and cherish forever._

“I hope you understand that I want you, hyung. But I won’t do anything unless you explicitly tell me you want me to.” Mingyu says with a determined face. Junhui wants so much more than he can show at the moment. He’s scared to show his _vulnerable_ side to Mingyu. Loving someone makes a person so vulnerable and weak and it scares Junhui. Not only will his vulnerability allow Mingyu to come into his life and give him everything, but also take away everything and hurt him.

It feels like he’s about to pour the nectar of his life into Mingyu’s hands and let the man drink it. He is scared to pull his heart out of the chest and place it in the middle of Mingyu’s palm. But deep inside his soul he knows, _he knows_ that he loved Mingyu even before he met Mingyu. 

“I know,” Junhui whispers and pries his body free from Mingyu’s embrace. “You look very sexy, Mingyu, but I mean it when I say button up for now. Not only for public decency but my welfare as well.” Junhui says as he walks out of the bedroom. 

Mingyu follows him and they both sit on the sofa. 

“So, what do you want to eat?” Mingyu asks.

“I miss food from home.”

“Then we go and look for food from home.”

“Will we be able to find it?” Junhui asks dubiously.

“Hyung, all the major cities in the world have Chinatown. Let’s go and look.” Mingyu says and extends his hands towards Junhui. The latter looks at those hands that seem to fit perfectly around his waist. The hands that are warm like a soothing fireplace in the middle of a snowy winter. The hands, when clasped together with his own, seem to break away Junhui’s walls and touch his soul.

Junhui reaches for Mingyu’s hands and they leave together, _hand in hand._

They arrive at Barrio Chino and it turns out to be quite small. Nonetheless, they find a local Chinese restaurant and sit on a table beside the window that gives them the view of the street. They receive the menu from the server and Mingyu complains he can’t read any of it because it’s written in Spanish and Hanzi.

“Don’t worry, I’ll order only the best food for you, Mingyu,” Junhui says.

“You can even read and write Chinese characters?” Mingyu asks with a surprised tone.

“Yes. I am Chinese after all.” 

“I’m not good at reading or writing Korean,” Mingyu mumbles while he inspects the sauces kept on the table. 

“What are you good at?” Junhui asks because he feels like picking on Mingyu. The latter looks at Junhui with a wounded pout, until something clicks inside him and a smirk forms on his face. He places his elbow on the table and rests his chin in his hand.

“I’m good at appreciating your beauty and complimenting you, hyung.” Mingyu’s voice is uncharacteristically deep and Junhui’s heart _betrays_ him by sinking deep into his stomach. He wants to tell himself that it’s a natural human reaction, but deep down he knows that he’s affected terribly by Mingyu. 

“Shut up!” He mutters through his clenched teeth as he tries to pretend to read the menu while his face burns up. Mingyu’s smirk turns into something gentler and he chooses to just admire Junhui’s face. 

They order pork dumplings, stir-fried chicken and fried rice. Junhui notices for the first time that Mingyu uses his left hand to eat. 

“Are you left-handed?”

“You noticed it just now, Junhwi hyung?” Mingyu asks as he fills his mouth with food using his left hand. 

“I noticed. Be happy about that,”

“Hmm. Good but pay more attention to me!” Mingyu whines with his mouth full. He looks adorable and Junhui’s heart swells with affection for the younger man.

“You eat well,” Junhui says and caresses Mingyu’s cheek with his left palm. Suddenly, just this single gesture feels more _intimate_ than anything else he has ever done. He tries to pull his hand back, but Mingyu holds his wrist with his right hand and keeps it there. He closes his eyes and leans his head into Junhui’s palm. The latter can only wordlessly admire the beauty that is Kim Mingyu. 

They talk. Talk about anything and everything. They have their awkward moments but it’s also simple to laugh over it. They pull each other’s leg but there are no hard feelings. It’s easy, so fucking easy. It almost feels like Junhui is hanging out with an old friend. With someone, he has known all his life. He somehow knows Mingyu even when they met two days ago. It doesn’t make sense but it also makes so much sense. 

Junhui knows it’s a _sign_ and he should accept that Mingyu is meant to be a _permanent_ part of his life. 

They finish their food and wait for their server to get their bill. Mingyu reaches for Junhui’s hand and looks at him with his dark and gentle eyes.

“Hyung? I have something I need to confess.” 

_‘Confess’_ is a dangerous word. Confess means the truth and Junhui is a realist who believes truth is always bitter. Truth is always corrupted and difficult to digest. The beauty of truth is always terribly sad.

He doesn’t say a word and looks at Mingyu and cautiously nods with a tight-lipped smile. Mingyu inhales a deep breath and looks Junhui dead in the eyes as he exhales.

“I like you. I like you a lot, actually.”

Everything _stops_ for a while. Colourful fireworks explode around them. A spotlight shines over them. He hears harps and violins playing behind him. Angels have descended to the earth and are singing in a choir. All the other humans are staring at them and clapping. The night is young and love is in the air.

The confession feels like _sunshine,_ lighting new hope and promise in Junhui’s life. 

Junhui squeezes Mingyu’s hands and smiles with his teeth on display. He smiles because the happiness inside him is bursting out of him. Junhui didn’t just want Mingyu’s body, but his heart and he’s one step closer to his desires being fulfilled. 

“Good. I like you, too.”

Mingyu returns one of the brightest smiles Junhui has ever witnessed in his life. 

  
  


~•~

  
  


A pleasant breeze springs over Mingyu and helps cool down his overheated body. Mingyu’s whole being is on fire because Moon Junhwi, _somehow,_ likes him back. He can barely hold his tongue and not voice his feelings continuously. His hands are intertwined with Junhui’s as they navigate their way in the neighbourhood of Palermo. It’s almost midnight and they walk around the area and talk about trivial things. 

Mingyu gets to know about Junhui’s best friend Wonwoo and the latter’s dislike for his existence.

“What did I do?” Mingyu grumbles.

“Don’t mind him. He’s just overprotective. He’s seen people take advantage of me because of my foreignness so he always looks out for me.” Junhui answers as they near a crowd on the roadside of Avenida Córdoba. 

“I guess if he’s worried about you then he is a real friend.” Mingyu muses and thinks about his pathetic past and how many people cared for his well-being when he was trapped in a hell created by his own misguided actions. 

“Hmm. Let’s not talk about Wonwoo. I wanna talk about you.” Junhui says coyly.

“Hyung, people don’t talk in clubs. They scream.” Mingyu replies with a blank expression. Junhui ignores his remarks and pulls him to the club’s entrance. They pay their cover fee and get stamped on their hands. Physically, the mark is harmless, but metaphorically, it _burns_ through Mingyu’s skin. It feels like he has come back to knock on the devil’s door and the latter is marking him with a branding iron to reinstate his loyalty.

Turns out, it’s their lucky day (probably Junhui’s because Mingyu has the worst luck) and it’s an open bar night. But an open bar also means that there are a limited number of options to get drunk on and Junhui seems to hate that scheme and calls it his own bad luck.

The moment they enter the place, Mingyu instantly hates it. It brings back memories that have been buried deep inside of him. The place is completely packed with bodies covered with sweat and deodorant. The dimly lit atmosphere with the strobing lights coming from the booth where DJ stands is sickening and Mingyu feels like throwing up. 

People jump up and down to the heavy bass sounds blasting from the speakers and the _alive_ ambience makes Mingyu feel a little _dead_ inside. 

He catches a few raised platforms where go-go boys dance sensually to music. They are mostly bare from the waist up and wear shorts that are too tight for them and leave very little to the imagination. They look big and handsome and their supply seems endless, but Mingyu can only focus his attention on the man who is holding his elbows tightly. The colourful neon lights fall on his face and Mingyu sees shades of red, blue and green _highlighting_ Junhui’s perfect face. The haze filters through the dark corners of the club and everything looks mystifying. He stares at Junhui’s lips and his self-control starts to crumble like fine sand falling through his hands.

Junhui pulls him towards the bar and orders two glasses of gin and coke. He watches as the elder downs the glass all at once. Mingyu follows in his footsteps and the liquor helps calm his nerves. He knows that he can’t be in a place like this sober, but he also wants to leave the place with his senses still intact. Junhui, on the other hand, has different plans and orders another drink for himself. 

Mingyu knows that the two of them are under a lot of attention at the moment. He’s aware of his own looks and he’s aware of the exquisite human standing beside him. There was a time he used to revel in the lecherous gaze of men and women thrown towards him. But that was definitely before he met Junhui. Now, it just feels wrong. _Unnatural. Nauseating._ He’s not here to play a role anymore.

It’s fairly dim in the club and he knows the _monsters_ lurk around in the shadows, luring a person in with the promise of immortality and in the guise of putting poison up through the nose. 

He needs to let go and distract his mind. He pulls Junhui by his hand and shimmies his way towards the middle of the dance floor. Junhui looks mildly surprised by Mingyu’s actions but it is quickly replaced by a sinful glint in his eyes.

Junhui wraps one of his hands around Mingyu’s neck and using his dominant hand, he starts unbuttoning Mingyu’s shirt. Mingyu watches Junhui carefully as he places his hands on Junhui’s waist, slowly pulling him closer. 

If Mingyu had to single out one thing about Junhui that pesters him, it’s that Junhui likes to play the game. The game of _push and pull._ One minute, Junhui _flows_ onto Mingyu’s shores like a wave and brings with him so much hope, happiness and comfort. The next minute, he _ebbs_ away from Mingyu and leaves the younger longing for his return. 

Junhui is always the one who ignites Mingyu’s carnal flame, but just when Mingyu gets used to the warmth, Junhui extinguishes the fire and behaves like he doesn’t see Mingyu’s walls have been burnt down with desire. 

So now, when Junhui starts revealing Mingyu’s torso and then places his hand over Mingyu’s chest, the _animal_ inside him comes to life and it roars. Junhui leans back and starts rolling his hips and Mingyu knows the older man is provoking him, but Mingyu is a weak man. And he needs to have more and more of Junhui. 

He wraps his fingers around the wrist of the hand placed on his chest and spins Junhui around. Junhui’s body stiffens for a moment until he relaxes and then reaches for the back of Mingyu’s neck and drags his fingers over Mingyu’s nape. The latter’s chest is plastered to Junhui’s back and he places his chin on Junhui’s shoulder, breathing him in and slowly moving his hips to the beat. 

“Mingyu,” Junhui calls his name and the elder’s breathless voice knocks him out. “Fuck, you are so hot.” Junhui grinds his ass over Mingyu’s crotch and after that, all reasons are lost. 

It’s a rush of adrenaline and hormones inside Mingyu’s body. Junhui is the sexiest creature that he has ever been with and his hips are able to do things that should honestly be considered _illegal_ in Mingyu’s opinion. They dance and Junhui buries his head in the crook of Mingyu’s neck. They stick close together without leaving any kind of space and Mingyu thinks that all the heat radiating off them will melt them together and turn them into a single entity. Mingyu _wants_ that. 

Junhui drinks a lot and the more he drinks, the racier his dance moves get. Junhui's inebriated state gives Mingyu more loose reins over Junhui’s body. He sucks on the column of Junhui’s neck as the latter filthily grinds his ass over Mingyu’s clothed dick. He tastes the salt on Junhui’s skin and is strangely reminded of the ocean. 

“Mingyu, fuck, I want you to do so many things to me. Why don’t you act on your desires? I’m all _yours_ for the week.” Junhui whispers in his ears and Mingyu desperately wants to act on his desires. But they are out in the public and he only wants Junhui for himself. He’s _selfish_ that way. 

He could drag Junhui to the spacious corridor on the second floor where everything goes down, but he wants Junhui in a more _intimate_ and _private_ way. He wants to savour every expanse of the elder’s skin until he becomes familiar with how Junhui tastes. Although Junhui’s provocative moves are definitely not helping Mingyu keep his desires at bay. 

At last, things aren’t meant to sail so smoothly. He hears an eerily _familiar_ tune, albeit corrupted with some new beats, blasting through the speakers. And soon, a _voice_ echoes in the club. 

Usually, people aren’t really attuned to how their voice actually sounds like. It’s all got to do with the three little bones called ossicles, located in the middle ear, that are responsible for the discrepancy between what people think they sound like and how others hear them. But a singer is forced to hear their voices regularly and remove this discrepancy. So they are very likely to instantly recognise the recording of their voice. 

Mingyu hears his _own_ low voice growling through the speakers and a deep-seated panic sets in. He can’t let Junhui figure out that it’s Mingyu’s song playing in the club. He has to get Junhui out of the club. Every second he lets his voice echo in the club, he increases his chances of being found out by Junhui.

“Junhwi,” Mingyu pants as the said man plays with his exposed nipple and sucks a mark on his collarbone. “Let’s go back to the house, _please.”_

Junhui pulls back and looks at Mingyu with hooded eyes. His expression remains blank until a coy smile blooms on his lips and even under strobing lights, Mingyu can catch the glint in his eyes. He holds Mingyu’s elbow and pulls him away from the dancefloor. Before leaving the club, Junhui makes sure to drink one last glass of screwdriver. After that, they waddle towards the exit. 

The cold breeze hits Mingyu’s overheated and sweaty body and makes him shiver. He is tipsy but still in control of his senses. He looks at Junhui and finds him standing on his two feet quite steadily and concludes that maybe Junhui isn’t as drunk as he thought he would be. Maybe it was just the adrenaline that had Junhui driving Mingyu crazy inside the club.

He books an Uber and they both get inside it. The car pulls to the main road and Mingyu looks out the window and tries to calm his heart. If somehow, Mingyu succeeds in playing his cards right, he can finally have the one thing he coveted since the beginning. _Junhui._

Mingyu suddenly feels warmth beside him. He does not want to make things uncomfortable for the driver, but surprisingly, Junhui chooses to just lay his head on Mingyu’s shoulders and he thinks that this is fine and decent for everyone. The car reaches the front of their apartment and Mingyu rushes Junhui upstairs.

They don’t even make it completely up the stairs when Junhui presses Mingyu to the railing and leaves open mouth kisses over Mingyu’s exposed skin. Mingyu feels like if he makes one wrong move, he’ll fall downwards, yet when it comes to the other man, he possesses _zero_ self-control. He tugs Junhui’s hair lightly and pulls his head back a bit so that he can lean down and connect their lips. 

It’s downright obscene. Junhui literally _fucks_ Mingyu’s mouth with his tongue. He moves his tongue in and out, then twists it around and licks up the roof of Mingyu’s mouth. The younger man can only whine into the kiss and beg for more and more and _more._

He’s selfish and also impatient. As soon as he gets Junhui inside the apartment, he tugs down his and the elder’s coat and throws them somewhere over the sofa in the living room. The way Junhui has him pressed to the main door, Mingyu thinks that he is ready to take things downtown here and it’s not something Mingyu wants. 

Mingyu grabs the back of Junhui’s thighs and lifts him up. The latter’s legs wrap around his waist and it feels so _natural_ like they have performed this dance a million times already. Junhui moans into the kiss as Mingyu navigates them towards the bedroom and the deliciously sweet sounds have all the blood in Mingyu’s body rushing down south.

Junhui huffs as Mingyu drops him on the bed. He discards his already unbuttoned shirt and leans over Junhui, dragging his fingers underneath Junhui’s shirt and feeling his warm skin. Junhui twitches and throws his head back, laughing breathlessly and Mingyu realises he is ticklish on his stomach. He lifts the elder’s shirt up and licks in between the ridges of his faint abs, tasting the salt again. He bites down lightly over Junhui’s sex lines and the gasp the man makes in return is beautiful. Mingyu is addicted and can’t hold back any longer.

He makes his way up and starts to pull Junhui’s shirt. The latter resists and slaps Mingyu’s hands away and Mingyu is confused. He grabs Junhui’s face and tries to read his face to _understand_ what he wants. Realisation suddenly dawns on him that Junhui is playing the game again and he hates it. He rests his forehead over Junhui’s and looks deep into his eyes.

“Don’t you want me, hyung? How long do you plan on keeping this up, huh?” Mingyu growls into Junhui’s face and watches the latter flinch from the intensity of his words. 

Junhui mutters something and Mingyu can’t seem to make sense of his words. 

“Say that again,” Mingyu says softly, leaving small kisses over his cheeks because even if the man pisses him off, he is beautiful and deserves to be _kissed_ constantly.

“Don’t. Wanna remember this,” Junhui slurs. “Wanna remember how you feel.”

Mingyu instantly stops his ministrations and looks at Junhui with wide eyes, searching for clues of intoxication. His face is flushed, his eyes are practically drooping and mostly, his words are dragged out. 

Mingyu wants Junhui, but not like this. Not when the latter won’t be able to even remember him the next day. He wants to imprint himself on Junhui’s mind and have him remember Mingyu for the rest of his life. Most of all, he does not wish to become a drunken mistake in Junhui's life. 

He hauls his body up and stands near the foot of the bed. After gathering his thoughts and letting go of his desires, he finally notices that in the midst of Junhui’s scent that lingers on his body, he reeks of alcohol as well and he completely sobers up to their situation. Junhui, on the other hand, is close to dozing off and Mingyu thinks at least he should wear clean clothes. But Junhui is set on being unmanageable and the least Mingyu can manage to do is remove his shoes and belt and lift his body up till his head is placed on the pillows. 

Mingyu then walks towards the bathroom and takes an icy cold shower to cool down the molten lava pumping through his veins. He looks back to all the events that happened throughout the day. He woke up and the first thing he did was make out with Junhui. Then, he finally accepted that he is falling in love with the other man and then strolled around the city with him. It felt like he was hanging out with an old friend. Then they ate Chinese food and Mingyu confessed to Junhui. The good thing that came out of that confession is that their feelings have been established and Mingyu can finally tread Junhui’s waters with more ease and without the fear of getting bitten. The only downfall about the day was nighttime when he had Junhui in his arms and somehow he still didn’t have him. 

But even if the night changes, Mingyu’s desires won’t change. If anything, it’ll grow into something bigger and bigger, until it bursts from all the pressure, wreaking havoc like a hurricane.

He walks out of the bathroom and heads towards the bed. He isn’t sure what boundaries he is allowed to cross as of yet, so he places the body pillow in the middle of the bed and lays on the other side of it, away from the window. He lays down and faces Junhui’s sleeping form. His eyes are half open and for a while, Mingyu wonders why he is so quiet if he’s awake. 

“Hyung?” 

Junhui doesn’t even budge and stays still. That’s when Mingyu realises that the other man is one of those people who sleep with their eyes open. He finally understands why he rubs his eyes all the time. They must get dried out very easily. 

“You are sleeping and won’t be able to hear a single thing I say, right?” Mingyu asks Junhui’s sleeping body as he leans forward on his elbow and brushes off stray hair from Junhui’s face.

“Hyung–” He shakes his head and quickly rectifies himself. _“Junhwi._ I want you to know that you’ve found a new home in my heart. So deep that it feels like you’re a part of me now. And the only other thing that has been able to become a part of me is my guitar. I want you to know that I am falling in love with you. I’m giving my heart to you and I hope you’ll give me yours in return. Just let me be yours, Jun.”

Junhui sleeps peacefully and Mingyu’s heart feels lighter now that he has finally admitted his feelings. Even if Junhui is practically still not aware of them, it's the thought that counts. 

He leaves a soft kiss on the corner of Junhui’s lips and then moves back to his side and lets the sleep take away the night. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> engagement from my readers motivates me to write more! 
> 
> i'm on [twitter](https://twitter.com/redsyub) or [curiouscat](https://curiouscat.me/redsyub) if you ever wanna talk! <3


	5. Day 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter turned out to mainly have jun's pov.

Before Junhui dares to open his eyes, he feels sick to his stomach. It’s like _acid_ is churning inside his stomach and trying to come up his oesophagus. Without taking in his surroundings, he bolts towards the bathroom and bends over the toilet and retches a thin stream of vomit. It’s _disgusting_ and he keeps on convulsing until nausea passes over. He gets up and rinses his mouth and face over the sink, trying to properly wake up to his senses. He looks at his own reflection in the mirror and notices that he is still wearing clothes from last night, a big emphasis on _still._ There are some fresh marks on his neck and stomach, but other than that, it all seems fine. He has no pain in his lower back and he heaves a sigh of relief because he comes to the conclusion that he _didn’t_ have sex with Kim Mingyu last night.

He walks out of the bathroom and finds Mingyu sleeping on the bed and hugging the body pillow tightly. For a while, Junhui just stands and stares at Mingyu’s peaceful face. He tries to remember last night, but his mind comes up completely blank. He _wanted_ to get drunk, but he never planned on experiencing a blackout. He just hopes he didn’t cause much trouble last night. 

He walks out of the room and heads towards the kitchen. As he looks out the window, he sees the sky painted in the hues of purple and orange and the sun lurking below the horizon. The streetlights are still on and Junhui clocks that it is way too _early_ to be up and about. But he has this deep craving to eat something _greasy_ and his hunger needs to be pacified. All the eateries are closed and his choices in the pantry are limited, but he manages to find some cheese and bread and decides to just cook some grilled cheese sandwiches. 

After appeasing his voracious hunger, Junhui’s brain seems to work a little better and he realises that he desperately needs a shower. The lukewarm water helps him destress and boosts the circulation of blood in his body. He washes away the stench of alcohol and other _mistakes_ from last night off his body. It’s refreshing and soothing and Junhui relishes in it. 

He walks out in a white hoodie and black lounge pants and watches Mingyu’s eyes blink open. Junhui’s body _craves_ to walk towards him and take the younger man in his embrace. Instead of greeting him, Junhui walks out and brews coffee. 

In very simple terms, Junhui is afraid. He likes to believe that he knows himself very well. And he is absolutely _positive_ that he might have tried to seduce Mingyu last night in his drunken state. But in the end, neither of them engaged in any sexual activity. Which leads Junhui to have _two_ assumptions on what could’ve happened last night.

The first assumption is that Mingyu rejected him because he does not want Junhui. Honestly, Junhui will _easily_ accept this belief over the other one floating in his head any day. It will make things very easy and he can simply fly back to Seoul without any strings attached to him. But he also knows that this belief is clearly _false._ Mainly because Mingyu has verbally confessed that he likes and wants Junhui. On top of that, he also mentioned that he won’t do anything to Junhui until the latter explicitly verbalises that he wants Mingyu.

That brings Junhui to the second assumption where Mingyu rejected him because he wants the latter in every possible way - _mentally, emotionally and physically._ And obviously, Junhui was not available in all the supposed ways last night. Drunk sex is a motion that lies in the grey area. It’s good until it’s not. Junhui appreciates the decency of the younger man but now some integral questions are being raised about his imminent future. Mingyu wants Junhui, but his desires aren’t limited to Junhui’s body. He wants so much _more_ than Junhui wants to accept.

_Love._ Junhui laughs bitterly to himself. Love was something that was supposed to be hidden deep inside his chest and intricately twisted with his veins. Although with his firm hands, Mingyu cut Junhui open with delicate precision and left the elder bleeding incessantly. He feels vulnerable. But in a peculiar way, he also feels that Mingyu will nurse him back to vitality and Junhui will come out of this stronger and more courageous. 

He is done resisting. He wants all of Mingyu.

“How are you feeling, hyung?” Mingyu asks as he walks towards the kitchen and helps himself with coffee that Junhui brewed.

“Huh? Oh yeah, I feel alright.” Junhui answers while staring absently out the window.

Mingyu comes back with a mug and sits across Junhui. After taking a few sips, he looks at Junhui earnestly. His eyes are still dark and gentle but there is no fire reflected in them. Junhui takes a glance at him with hesitant eyes.

“I take that you don’t remember anything from last night,” Mingyu isn’t asking and his voice is ice cold. The guilt crawls up to Junhui’s brain through his veins because he has no idea what he did that has Mingyu so irritated. He gingerly shakes his head and looks down at his mug.

They stay silent after that. Junhui feels like words will unnecessarily cause harm. He decides to listen to the silence surrounding them and search for signs. He _hates_ the atmosphere they have unintentionally created. It is meant to be easy with Mingyu. _Safe_ . _Comfortable_ . Granted that he is feeling quite the opposite of all those emotions. He hates it. It’s suffocating and for some reason, it feels unnatural. He needs to breathe. He needs to _breathe in Mingyu._

“Thank you,” Junhui says in a voice that sounds distant to him. “For not having sex with me last night.” Mingyu looks at him with calculating eyes until his eyebrows bunch together and the gentleness dissipates from his lovely eyes.

“Why?” His voice sounds sharp yet hollow. “Why are you thanking me? I want to ask you something very important, hyung. Why do you _think_ I’m here with you right now?”

Junhui _knows_ that Mingyu was brought to him by destiny. Mingyu is his destiny and he is going to be the one who is going to help him find the meaning of life and beyond.

“I do-don’t know.” Junhui fumbles with his words because he can feel that a fire has started to burn around them.

“If you think that I am here just to get in your pants, then _you_ are wrong.” Mingyu’s voice is tight and penetrates deep into Junhui’s skin, leaving behind goosebumps. Junhui suddenly feels trapped, so he gets up. The chair creaks over the floor and echoes loudly in the room. He walks towards the sink and puts his mug there. Mingyu silently studies each and every move that Junhui makes. The latter takes a few deep breaths to calm himself and turns around to look Mingyu in the eyes. He _can’t_ lose to Mingyu even when this isn’t meant to be a battle. 

“Then what is right?”

There is a slight shift in Mingyu’s expression until it dissolves into something _tender_ and _open._ Mingyu’s eyes waver and the icy cold demeanour turns timid.

“Don’t make me say it,” Mingyu shakes his head simultaneously. “My feelings for you are _deeper_ than I am mentally capable of handling. I want, no, I _need_ you for so much more, but I am terrified to voice it. With you, I feel like a better man, a better human. I love how you make me want to do good and be good. You are patient with me and cherish me like we have known each other for decades. I get this feeling that we have been together for years, but I still wish to stay by your side for forevermore. It’s you. _It’s you._ Since the moment we met, it’s you who has been on my mind. I am consumed by your thoughts.”

Mingyu’s words leave Junhui completely flabbergasted. The younger man’s words reverberate inside his head like butterflies. All of a sudden, the beams from the sun filter in through the window and hit Mingyu’s lovely face. It _kisses_ him and makes him glow heavenly. The minute particles of dust dance around Mingyu, but it feels like a _golden haze_ is surrounding Mingyu. 

Junhui feels exalted. If he chooses to give in, he will embrace a new life. It’s a bright new day which brings the promise of a new beginning, new hope and new love. A voice inside him says that it’s the love he didn’t even know he was _looking_ for but simultaneously _yearning_ for all his life. 

Junhui is ready to give Mingyu his _body_ until they both become one. Junhui is ready to give Mingyu his _soul_ until however long Mingyu chooses to hold on to it. 

“You aren’t just saying all this to melt my heart so that you can sleep with me?” Junhui asks because he wants to be sure. Mingyu’s eyes look wounded and he rushes to stand up. The chair falls back, but Mingyu doesn’t care. Instead, he rounds the table and reaches Junhui, forcing the latter to look at him.

“Hyung! Why do you _refuse_ to see the things that happen between us? Let me be real with you. I was a sceptic before I met you. True love and designed encounters sounded romantic in poetry but unreasonable in real life. You did the utter impossible because it's the only thing that _explains_ my feelings for you. I am a partisan of fate and destiny now and it is all because of you, Moon Junhwi.”

“I know how you feel, Mingyu,” Junhui says with conviction. “Your feelings are exactly mirrored inside of me. You are all that I think about and you are all that I need.” 

“Really?” Mingyu looks like he heard some unbelievable news. Mingyu shines and Junhui wants to swallow him till the former becomes a _part of him._

Junhui thinks that they both can talk in circles for hours, but it isn’t going to take them anywhere. He lets his _actions_ do the talking. 

He closes the distance between them and wraps his hands around Mingyu’s neck. The latter automatically brings his arms around Junhui’s back and pulls him in. His nose is overwhelmed with Mingyu’s scent. It is spicy but not overbearing and Junhui loves his spices. Mingyu is insanely sexy and Junhui is just a normal human being who craves for the best. 

Their lips meet hurriedly and part again. It is a continuous dance of meeting and parting. There is something surreal about kissing Mingyu in the morning. It is way _better_ than his cup of coffee or any food he consumes. It is sweeter and revitalizes his mind. Junhui licks over Mingyu’s lips and tastes sugar which is _ironic_ in a way because both of them were drinking coffee prior to this which was bitter. Maybe the sweetness is something that Mingyu inherently possesses or maybe it is something that _only_ Junhui can taste. 

Mingyu is warm, solid and real. Junhui feels like the sun sits on Mingyu’s lips and burns Junhui in the most pleasant way. Kissing Mingyu is like playing the piano. When his fingers fly faster over the keys, the sound created is intricately beautiful and makes him feel more _exuberant._ Similarly, when Junhui kisses Mingyu harder by not even letting the latter part for a breath, the husky sound he makes _entices_ Junhui. 

“I need you, Mingyu.” Junhui rasps as they both break the kiss to catch their breaths. Mingyu looks positively stunned. His face and ears are flushed and his eyes are hazy. His lips are painted red by Junhui’s crosses of fiery love. Junhui relishes over the fact that his effect over Mingyu is _undeniably_ hot. Their combined passion could _warm the sun._

Mingyu lunges back for a kiss and starts moving his hands lower. His touch is hot even over Junhui’s clothes. Mingyu’s hands caress Junhui asscheeks and then with a sudden manoeuvre, he lifts Junhui up. The latter’s thighs wrap naturally around Mingyu’s waist and it feels so _familiar_ that it is almost bizarre.

Instead of taking them to the bed, Mingyu presses Junhui to the wall beside the bed. Mingyu pulls away from Junhui’s mouth and latches onto his jaw, eliciting a moan from the elder. He moves down and then licks Junhui’s neck, creating a wet stripe that makes him shudder. 

Mingyu rolls his hips into Junhui’s and the latter raises his head in pleasure, absolutely turned on by the fact that Mingyu is strong enough to lift him up for so long. 

“Take me to bed.” Junhui pants as Mingyu rubs his fingers over the former’s nipple through the hoodie. Junhui feels _helpless_ in this position because he wants to do so much, but he’s scared he’ll fall and break his bones. 

“But you look _heavenly_ here in my arms, whimpering for more of me,” Mingyu says with a cheeky smirk on his face as he comes up to press his lips against Junhui’s. When he understands what Mingyu said through clouds of pleasure, he laughs. More precisely, he snorts as Mingyu hinders his mouth from opening properly. The action is flustering in itself, but Junhui is in his element with Mingyu and there is no shame.

“I’ll look _more heavenly_ on the bed without my clothes on, darling.” Mingyu’s grip around Junhui tightens as he sucks in a sharp breath. Instead of torturing Junhui any further, Mingyu carries him over to the bed and drops him on it. Junhui tries to recover some of his grace, but then he watches Mingyu remove his T-shirt. 

Mingyu is a _sex god._ It’s the only reasonable explanation for the view in front of Junhui’s eyes. He feels his mouth drying up and his heart trying to jump out of his chest to _reach_ Mingyu. 

He saw glimpses of Mingyu’s glorious tan skin but most of his memories are trapped in a haze. In contrast, the morning sun provides Junhui with a high definition version of Mingyu’s chiselled body. His bare torso is adorned by well-defined chest and rock hard abs. His arms are so thick that they’d be able to crush Junhui’s skull in them, not that he wants to imagine that. 

Though his face, even when it’s masculine and gorgeous, dons a _timid_ expression. His face is red and his eyes are dark with lust, but he hesitates to move.

“Let me see you, too.” Mingyu implores and understanding dawns on Junhui’s mind.

“Come here,” Junhui demands. 

Mingyu slowly crawls over Junhui, his eyes preying on his body until he comes face to face with Junhui while hovering above the latter. A mischievous grin blossoms over Junhui’s lips and then he flips them over.

Junhui finally feels like he is in his element as he sits over Mingyu with his thighs bracketing the younger’s waist. Mingyu lies below him like a gourmet dessert placed for him and Junhui plans on ravishing him. 

Junhui slowly removes his T-shirt while languidly rocking his hips. He takes his _sweet time_ revealing every expanse of his skin, but Mingyu _patiently_ drinks in the picture that he is painting. 

“You’re hard, Mingyu,” Junhui says as he lightly strokes his fingers on Mingyu’s abs. Mingyu’s muscles are hard, but his cock feels more solid and Junhui feels lightheaded thinking about it pressing against his ass. 

“It’s because I like you and want this.” Mingyu closes his eyes as Junhui rolls Mingyu’s nipple between his fingers. 

“Just _how bad_ do you want this?” Junhui bends down and leans closer until his face is only inches away from Mingyu’s. Their breaths fan each other’s face. They both breathe each other. 

Mingyu flattens his palms on Junhui’s sides and starts roaming his body. Junhui enjoys the touch and whimpers when Mingyu presses on a sore muscle. Taking advantage of Junhui’s mildly distracted state, Mingyu flips them back over and starts placing kisses over Junhui’s stomach. 

“So bad, hyung” Mingyu murmurs into Junhui’s skin while he lightly bites his hips, “that I don’t think I’ll ever,” He starts tugging Junhui’s pants lower and kisses the skin that is revealed, “be able to want someone else.” Junhui is only left in his briefs as Mingyu kneels in front of him and raises his legs, placing them on his shoulders. He starts leaving tender kisses on his ankles and makes his way up. 

“You’ve _ruined_ me, Moon Junhwi.” Mingyu forgoes kissing gently now and leaves mild bites all over Junhui’s inner thighs, sucking them and then licking them, as an _afterthought_ or to maybe cool the burns he’s leaving all over Junhui’s legs. 

Junhui shifts around restlessly because he’s back at Mingyu’s mercy. Junhui wants to rile him up and see him frantic with lust until he is begging for Junhui’s love. But Mingyu starts licking Junhui's erection through his briefs and all his want for control is _thrown_ off the bed. 

“Mingyu.” His voice comes out more like a moan than a call. He tightens his fingers around Mingyu’s hair strands, bucking roughly into his mouth. 

“I feel strangely _jealous_ of any other human who has had you, hyung.” Mingyu digs his fingers inside Junhui’s waistband and pulls it down and drops it on the floor. Junhui catches Mingyu _devouring_ his body with his eyes. He can see the raw and wolfish desires swirling in Mingyu’s eyes. It’s full of _carnality._

All five senses of Junhui are engulfed by Mingyu. All his eyes _assimilate_ is Mingyu’s beautiful face and body, a little worked up but absolutely stunning. All he can _hear_ is Mingyu, his low growls, his hot breaths and the wet sound he makes as he devours Junhui with his lips and tongue. All he can _smell_ is Mingyu’s serene and sensual scent. All he can _taste_ is the sugar from Mingyu’s mouth. And lastly, all he can _feel_ is Mingyu’s fiery touch burning his whole body and making him yearn for more of him.

_Mingyu. Mingyu. Mingyu. Mingyu. Mingyu._

Mingyu moves up and lets Junhui taste more of him. Their lips are slick with each other’s saliva and it’s hot and moist. Junhui pulls him in as he maps the inside of Mingyu’s mouth with his tongue. Mingyu moves Junhui’s hips with his hands till their cocks brush. It’s too much but nothing at the same time. 

“Mingyu, _please.”_ Junhui doesn’t even realise he’s begging until Mingyu leans back to give him an unabated bashful grin. Mingyu dives down to suck at Junhui’s lump that sticks out from the throat. Junhui whimpers and pain and pleasure have suddenly _merged_ into a single emotion. 

“Fuck, Junhwi. Let me be inside you.” Junhui hears an edge of desperation in Mingyu’s voice, a total contrast from the expression he had a moment ago. It’s then that he feels Mingyu rutting against his leg, albeit very slowly, only enough to release a little tension. 

“Get up.” Junhui manages to order even in his wrecked state. He’s panting but manages to keep his voice stern. Mingyu immediately sits back and looks at Junhui with a wounded expression. 

“Don’t push me away, please. It _kills_ me,” Mingyu starts begging. Before he can utter another word, Junhui sits up as well and cups Mingyu’s face in his palms, leaving kisses below his eyes. 

“Relax, baby,” Junhui coos, sliding his hand through Mingyu’s silky hair. “I need you to get the condom and lube from my suitcase.”

Mingyu looks back at him with an unreadable expression. But still, he pulls away and walks towards Junhui’s suitcase and fetches the supplies. Junhui thinks it’s pure luck that they both are fairly the same size and his condom will fit Mingyu as well. 

Mingyu comes back and Junhui is tired of foreplay. It’s a travesty created by those hedonists. He needs things to take off. Probably right about _now._ He isn’t also very satisfied with the fact that he is naked while Mingyu is still strutting off in his pants. 

Oddly enough, it seems like Mingyu plans on ripping apart Junhui to his seams. Gone are those hesitant eyes, determined to worship him. There is a ceaseless _need_ to embrace Junhui in an amatory way. 

Mingyu crawls between Junhui’s legs and pulls his body so that half of it lays on Mingyu’s lap. Junhui gasps from the force, but it soon turns into something lewder as Mingyu licks over his balls. The anticipation of what will happen next has his heart _racing_ and his body _twitching._ He has his eyes closed, but he hears the cap of the bottle open and the squirt of lube coming out of the bottle. 

“You ready?” Mingyu asks and Junhui breathes out, _“Yes.”_

The first finger makes him tense up like a guitar string because it’s foreign and cold. 

“Relax and breathe for me, _babe,”_ Mingyu whispers. The use of a pet name is new and has Junhui opening his eyes. He meets Mingyu’s gaze. 

Junhui sees the _devil_ in his eyes and he wants to commit every single _sin_ in this world to have what he wants. He wants it all. _He wants Mingyu._

Mingyu slowly moves his finger. Junhui runs his fingers through his hair to push it back from his face. Mingyu moves so _slowly_ that Junhui thinks at this rate, he will never be able to relax because his level of excitement will never be met. So he decides to get down to one thing that has always worked in his favour. 

Talk. To be more precise, he means _dirty talk._ It’s cliched but a necessity because their current pace will make him go mad. 

“Mingyu?” Junhui only receives a hum in response. “How do I look?” Mingyu looks at him hungrily.

Before he can respond, Junhui continues, “Bet the marks that you’ve left all over me are blooming prettily over my skin. You have marked your territory all over my body. How does it feel to know that you have me, _babe?”_ Junhui uses the same pet name Mingyu used on him. Mingyu’s body tightens and the movement of his fingers gain some pace. 

“Bet I look like someone who wants your cock so bad. Your big cock filling me up and driving me insane. Till I’m making incoherent noises and screaming your name.” Mingyu’s looks like he’s trying his best to restrain himself from unleashing a beast. He’s a hard one to crack. Junhui _loves_ challenges. 

“Imagine me on my knees, begging for more and more as you keep pounding into me so hard. _Ah,_ I’ll take it so well, sweetheart. _Just for you.”_ Junhui feels Mingyu’s second finger enter. His movements have lost the grace and tenderness and it has adopted a sense of desperation and clumsiness.

“Stop talking, Jun.” Mingyu hisses through his clenched teeth. A little more, Junhui thinks.

“Let’s fuck all day, Mingyu. Make this room our sex chamber. We’ll fuck till neither of us is capable of walking anymore. You’ll make me see the stars several times and cover my whole body with your cum. We’ll be a fucking mess. Give it to me, Mingyu! Give it to me hard–” Mingyu leans over Junhui and slips two of his fingers in Junhui’s mouth. His fingers stretch him out with a purpose instead of dragging out the process and Junhui internally _celebrates_ his victory. 

Junhui sucks on Mingyu’s fingers while looking at him through his eyelashes. It’s the only thing that is grounding him and not making him _lose_ his mind from the way Mingyu stretches him out. 

It’s crazy how Junhui is the one who is under Mingyu’s ministrations, but the latter is getting worked up as well, panting and groaning in sync with Junhui. 

“D’you know when I first saw you and you asked me about your lips,” Mingyu pulls his fingers out of Junhui’s mouth and starts stroking those fingers against the elder's lips, spreading the spit everywhere. Junhui can only imagine how _erotic_ he looks. “The only thing I wanted to say was how your lips are fabricated by the gods to make a mortal crave your kisses till they find heaven on earth through you.”

“Mingyu, kiss me,” Junhui begs. Mingyu’s lips touch his and it’s a _passionate, demanding, soul-stirring_ kiss. Junhui whines into the kiss as Mingyu’s fingers probe deeper and faster and start stimulating that one spot that has him mewling and moaning relentlessly. 

The pleasure is taking over him. Junhui can feel all his muscles tightening in want of a release. But he loses his thinking ability when Mingyu inserts his fourth finger. 

“Oh, fuck!” Junhui yells from the stretch. It’s too much. Junhui hasn’t been stretched out like this in so long. It burns in a way that has Junhui craving for more. On one hand, Mingyu is fingering Junhui roughly and making him lose his goddamn mind. On the other hand, he is placing soft and gentle kisses all over his face. The _contradiction_ between the two actions makes Junhui blink away a few tears from his eyes. Mingyu laps his tears tenderly. 

“Need you, _ah,_ need you, _please!”_

Mingyu looks at him with glossed eyes and nods vigorously. He slowly removes his fingers and turns Junhui to his side. Junhui feels empty and needy so he watches Mingyu remove his pants along with the briefs and tears off the packet of condom to roll it on his cock. Inches and inches of sun-kissed skin on display, all for Junhui. It’s everything that he ever wanted and it’s all that he needs. 

Mingyu climbs behind him and Junhui is wrapped with warmth from behind. After a few experimental prodding, Junhui finally feels Mingyu’s head slipping inside his entrance. Junhui is hyper-aware of every touch and Mingyu’s fingers snake from behind him to roll his nipples and his lips convey a silent conversation to his neck. 

“Shit, you’re still so tight.” Mingyu groans as he lightly thrusts inside. Junhui feels the burn and lets out a strangled gasp. Mingyu slips in slowly, _inch by inch,_ till Junhui feels absolutely full and clenches involuntarily because it feels like he’s going to tear up. 

Mingyu’s hands roam around his body, teasing and leaving fiery trails in their wake, while he stays inside, not moving for a few moments and letting Junhui get used to the fullness. Junhui buries his head into the pillow as Mingyu licks and sucks the back of his neck and shoulders. Other than the wet sounds coming from the contact of Junhui’s skin with Mingyu’s lips and Junhui’s muffled breathing, it’s mostly _serenely_ quiet. But Junhui’s own deafening heartbeat makes it too hard to appreciate the silence. 

“You can move,” Junhui mumbles into the pillow, but Mingyu somehow understands his words and rocks into him slowly. It’s _terribly_ slow. 

Mingyu fucks Junhui like he has _all the time_ in the world. 

He only sticks to shallow thrusts, like it’s not on his agenda to get off just yet, and Junhui’s whole body shakes from the stimulation that just isn’t enough to achieve anything. 

“So good, Junhwi. You feel like heaven.” Mingyu whispers into his ears.

“Yeah? Take me to heaven then, _h-ha.”_ Junhui urges by rolling his hips back only to be stopped by Mingyu’s tight hold over his hips which bruises against his skin.

Mingyu ignores his comment and continues with his brutally slow pace. He goes deeper and harder and Junhui groans and pants breathlessly, all the blood in his body flowing towards his groin.

He realises that they _aren’t fucking,_ not even close to it. They are _making love._

“You’re going too slow,” Junhui complains while knitting his brows. Mingyu completely stops thrusting his dick, making Junhui whine.

“Hyung, I have a rule to never have sex in the morning. It is sacred to me. If only you’ll understand that I’m not doing this just to get off. _You’re special._ An exception.” Mingyu says. 

Junhui didn’t know it was possible to get even hotter than he already was. Mingyu’s words transport him back to that _blurry future_ where he’s running around on the dewy grass barefoot. He’s _in love,_ he’s very deeply in love with Mingyu. He can’t even express how much he loves him at the moment. He’s _scared_ to express himself.

“Shut up.” He mutters weakly. It’s the only words that he can manage for now.

Mingyu curls both his arms around Junhui ribs to hold him in place while he raises his leg and wraps it around Junhui to cage him in. They are so close that Junhui can’t make out where Mingyu _stops_ and where he _begins._ Mingyu finally obliges to Junhui’s relentless whines and sets a moderate pace, pivoting his hips to the beat of a metronome. 

“Fuck! Yes, Mingyu. So good, baby!” Junhui praises Mingyu. It’s at that moment, he hears Mingyu whimper and feels him tighten his grip. Junhui turns his head to glance at Mingyu and finds that the man looks _wrecked_ beyond comparison even when Junhui is the one with the dick up his ass.

He’s absolutely touched, even marvelled by the fact that Mingyu chooses some _tender fucking_ for their first time, but if Junhui is being honest, he has been strung and on the edge since last evening when he saw the sex god dancing under the pretty lights. It’s a shame he does not remember much of it. But at the moment, he needs a desperate release and Mingyu’s slow pace is not enough. He needs more. And now Junhui finally understands how _easily_ he can get under Mingyu’s skin. 

“You are doing so good, Mingyu. Just like t-that. _Ah!_ I love it!” Junhui slurs. Mingyu slides one of his hands down and grabs Junhui’s inner thigh, hiking it up a little. He picks up his pace and Junhui finally feels the pleasure clouding his senses. Mingyu grazes his prostate and Junhui yelps from the sting. 

_“More!”_ Junhui yells. “Faster!” 

Junhui can actually feel how hard Mingyu is inside him. It’s hard and it’s hot and Junhui is desperately clenching around him, urging him to go even harder. 

“Shit, Jun! Your ass. _Hah,_ you take me so well, baby.” Mingyu growls into Junhui’s ears and the latter lets out a whine which had been bubbling in his throat and feels a shiver down his spine. 

He feels Mingyu pull all the way out, only to slam back roughly and make him move forward with the force. Junhui hears the sound of skin slapping against each other as Mingyu pistons into him and makes Junhui mewl and purr for more and _more and more_. 

Junhui grabs and pulls the bedsheet below him as Mingyu finds the spot and proceeds to hammer at it relentlessly. The elder feels the familiar twisting in his belly, indicating his release and he finally reaches for his dick and starts to stroke it messily. 

“Right there! Fuck, I love your big cock!” Mingyu builds a consistent rhythm and Junhui matches his pace as he jerks himself off and rolls his hips back on Mingyu’s cock. 

It feels amazing. He knows that he’s drooling and practically at Mingyu’s mercy as he shakes and babbles into the pillow. 

“You’re so beautiful, Junhwi. This is all for me.” Mingyu’s words are tender, but his movements are rough and hard, just the way Junhui likes it.

“Mingyu, I’m close,” Junhui purrs. 

“Yeah? I wanna see you come for me, baby. Do it!” Mingyu turns Junhui on his stomach and climbs over him, fucking him hard. His pace turns sloppy as he rams inside him with only a single aim in his mind. Junhui raises his hips a bit so he can freely slide his hand around his cock. 

Junhui feels overwhelmed. His orgasm hits him like a brick as his eyes shut and his back arches. He sees white behind his eyelids as he comes with a stretched-out moan with Mingyu’s name on his lips. The tremors make his body twitch uncontrollably and he clenches down on Mingyu’s cock. 

Mingyu rams into him wildly and starts cursing in English. Junhui whines and writhes underneath him and Mingyu finally lets out a strangled gasp as he slows down his pace, only to push in _once, twice, thrice,_ finally coming into the condom.

Mingyu pulls out and removes the condom, while Junhui lies straight and catches his breath. His stomach is covered with his own cum and the bedsheet is also soiled with it. He has a hard time processing things that led to his current state. Mingyu lies down beside him and looks at him reverently.

Those eyes which were _hungry_ for Junhui are back to being _gentle_ and the sight in front of Junhui is breathtaking. Mingyu looks _lovely_ in his satiated state under the morning sun. His hard muscles look tender and Junhui wants to touch them again. He wants to learn and memorise every single curve and edge of Mingyu’s body until he is able to recognise him with a single touch in the dark. 

Junhui wriggles his body towards Mingyu and lies on his elbows, resting his head in his palms. 

“Mingyu?” 

“Yes, hyung?”

“Let’s do it again!” Mingyu’s eyes go wide and he looks at Junhui with an alarmed expression. 

_“Right now?”_ Mingyu’s voice sounds uncharacteristically high-pitched.

“Yeah, now,” Junhui says and moves closer to Mingyu. 

“Can you take me again?” 

“Ah, fuck no,” Junhui says blankly as he clambers over Mingyu’s hips and looks at him with a mischievous look.

“You have that glint in your eyes again. I’m scared.” Mingyu confesses hesitantly.

“Don’t be scared, Mingyu-yah. Just trust me.” Junhui coos as he starts roaming his hands over Mingyu’s abs, running a path through the ridges with his fingers. 

“Hyung,” Mingyu’s voice comes strangled from his throat and Junhui thinks he should just get to the point instead of playing coy. 

“I want to fuck you now,” Junhui whispers in a low tone and looks at Mingyu with hungry eyes. 

“Oh, _fuck!”_ Mingyu gasps breathlessly as Junhui leans down and starts leaving tame licks over Mingyu’s stomach, imitating a cat.

“Switching is completely natural and it’s a healthy expression of your sexuality.” Junhui murmurs into his skin, sending vibrations into him and making him shiver.

“I agree but _hyung!_ I can’t get hard so fast,” Mingyu complains. Junhui just takes it as a challenge and a way to prove his prowess. 

“There is no hurry. I’m interested in caressing your body with my lips at the moment,” Junhui curls his tongue around as he lathers Mingyu’s skin with his saliva, making the man writhe below him. “I believe you’re quite the expert in this activity. _Foreplay,_ you know?” Junhui taunts him by flashing a cheeky grin. Before Mingyu can retort, Junhui leans back down and wraps his lips around Mingyu’s nipple and the words are stuck in the younger’s throat.

Junhui makes the most use of his hands and tongue in making Mingyu gasp and moan. The sounds he makes are so _delicious_ that Junhui wants to eat them up. He kisses Mingyu and everything in the world feels right. He leaves tender kisses all over Mingyu’s face, nuzzling his nose over his and making the younger giggle. Making out with Mingyu is easy, something he’s used to. Something that feels natural. Something he can do for _years and years_ to come. _Decades._ _Centuries,_ but that is going out on a major stretch. 

Junhui nips and sucks the beautiful honey skin, watching the marks bloom all over his body. It’s _animalistic,_ appeasing the emotions of dominance that weren’t always there, to begin with. Mingyu lays there with a layer of sweat covering his whole body, his body rising with every breath he takes and Junhui thinks he’s glowing. He looks like a stunning piece of beauty, coveted by the greatest artists in the world. 

If only Junhui could draw, he would take this moment and capture it on canvas – Mingyu looking so seductive over ruined sheets, his body all marked up and gleaming with sweat and his saliva, panting and craving for Junhui’s touch. It’s a _vision_ and it needs to be _immortalised._ And then Junhui remembers.

He gets up from his place and moves away from the bed to walk towards Mingyu’s belongings. In the meanwhile, he also finds a towel and cleans the almost dried off cum from his body. He looks for the thing keenly until he finds it and lights up like a bulb. He grabs it and makes his way back to Mingyu.

“You won’t mind if I use your camera, right?” Junhui asks as he removes the cover from the lens and switches it on. 

“You’re planning on clicking my nude picture using my camera?” Mingyu asks a little hysterically.

“Well, I trust you to transfer them to me later somehow but yeah. I want to.” Junhui says as he tries to figure out the settings for the perfect shot. 

“I look too hot to handle, right?”

“You look phenomenal, like a vision out of my wet dreams.” Junhui declares it without any pretences and Mingyu turns even redder. _Perfect._

Junhui has to stand over Mingyu so that he can get as much of the latter’s body in the shot as possible. He angles the camera and looks through the viewfinder. Mingyu lies there waiting, giving Junhui a smouldering look, positioning his body so that all his best features are highlighted. 

Junhui clicks once, twice and then he gets into a zone, changing his angles and his body position so that he misses out on nothing. He does not want to miss a single thing about Mingyu. His sharp muscles, lean body and godly symmetrical proportions, all laid out for Junhui’s eyes to feast. People might say this is _pornography,_ but Junhui thinks this is _erotica._ Something that is so profoundly ethereal in its beguiling sensuality.

It isn’t until he is far away from the bed that Mingyu starts pouting. 

“Junhwi, you’ve taken enough pictures! I need you here.” 

Junhui giggles but obliges by shutting the camera off and placing it aside. He walks towards the bed and grabs the bottle of lube that’s somehow found its place on the floor. 

“Are you ready, Mingyu-yah?” Junhui asks as he presses one knee on the edge of the bed while looking at Mingyu with a predatory look. Junhui is already sporting a semi, but he can also see Mingyu’s cock twitch back to life. 

Mingyu nods in response, a little too eagerly and Junhui thinks avidity is a _good look_ on him.

Junhui slides his hand up Mingyu’s leg as he crawls over him and feels the supple flesh on his fingertips until he reaches his hips. Then with one gentle smile, he flips him over, making Mingyu gasp loudly. He glides his hands over the plush swell of Mingyu’s ass and slaps them lightly. The lewd moan that comes out of Mingyu’s lips _awakens_ the animal inside Junhui, waiting to ruin him. 

“Mingyu, my darling. You were quite gentle with me and I appreciate the tenderness. Although I cannot promise you the same gentleness,” Junhui leans over Mingyu and starts leaving a trail of bruising kisses from the nape of his neck and meanders down. “But what I can promise is that,” Junhui murmurs into Mingyu’s skin and the latter twitches from need. “I will make you feel so good that you’ll see the stars,” Junhui goes lower and curls his tongue around the younger’s dimple of Venus, making sure his whispers would be inaudible to Mingyu. “And probably _hand you my heart_ in the process.”

Junhui sits up and coats his fingers with lube. He blows over his fingers and rubs them together to warm the liquid. Junhui leans over Mingyu and kisses the younger’s shoulder as he pushes a finger inside the latter’s entrance, hearing a muffled moan from the man underneath him. 

Unlike Mingyu, Junhui does not like to play the long game. He is a patient man but when it comes to bedroom sports, forbearance isn’t his _strongest_ suit. Mingyu is tight and Junhui wonders if he ever let anyone take him from the behind before with the noises he makes like he isn’t used to getting fingered. 

Once he gets comfortable with moving his finger without any resistance, he slips in his second finger and curls them efficiently, scissoring them slowly and watching Mingyu _crumble_ underneath him. 

“Talk to me, Mingyu. Tell me if it’s good.” Junhui cajoles. Mingyu turns his head and hisses with that one good thrust Junhui makes.

“So good,” Mingyu pants. “I love it.”

Junhui is satisfied with Mingyu’s words and decides to reward him for them. 

“Good. You’re doing very good, Mingyu. You’re _perfect._ All this for me, right?” Junhui inserts his third finger as he asks the question and Mingyu screams from the sudden intrusion.

“Yes! All for you, Junhwi!” Mingyu clenches hard over his fingers and he has to momentarily stop moving his fingers to let Mingyu get accustomed to them. He keeps mapping kisses all over Mingyu’s back and finally resumes moving his fingers when he feels Mingyu relax considerably.

Junhui feels his patience slipping away with the way Mingyu feels in his hands. He’s warm and smooth and his eyes devour the perfection that is Mingyu. The younger is _compliant_ under his touch and he envisions a scene of breaking Mingyu apart. His feral visions make him delirious. He already _knows_ how he’ll make Mingyu take his cock. 

Junhui goes in deep and rubs the inside walls until he finds what he needs. Mingyu is left incoherent, mostly sticking to letting out English curses as Junhui diligently thrusts into that one spot. The sounds are _filthy,_ the excess lube splat around Mingyu’s entrance making it even louder. Junhui slips in his fourth finger so that the sounds that Mingyu makes overpowers them. 

“That’s it, baby. Just a little more. You are doing so good. You are gorgeous beyond belief,” Junhui whispers into Mingyu’s ears and presses his body against Mingyu. It’s searing and clammy, but it feels like heaven. “You feel that sweetheart? Feel how hard I am for you?”

“I need you, _please,”_ Mingyu begs as he rolls his own hips backwards, trying to grind on Junhui’s fingers. Junhui carefully pulls his fingers and rubs the lube off on the sheets. It’s a blessing that he rented a place with a working washing machine because this bedsheet desperately needs a wash after they are done with their activities. 

“Mingyu?” Mingyu turns his head to look at Junhui with hooded eyes. The want in his eyes _knocks_ the breath out of Junhui’s chest. It’s frenetic. _Desirous._ “I want you to ride me. Can you do that?” Mingyu completely turns to lie on his back and pulls Junhui in by his hips. 

Mingyu pushes his tongue inside Junhui's mouth and wraps it around the latter’s tongue. Then he pulls it out and licks over the peeking tongue and lips. It’s _torturous_ because it feels domestic and Junhui yearns for this. He wishes to capture this moment in a bottle and hide it away from the world. Just _Junhui and Mingyu_ till the world ends. 

Mingyu crawls over him and Junhui lies down below him. Their cocks brush together and he can feel that Mingyu is already leaking. Junhui scrambles for a condom, but Mingyu snatches it from him. He tears off the packet and then grabs Junhui's erection. The elder gasps from just a single touch and gulps down the excess saliva. Mingyu slowly rolls the condom over Junhui dick then grabs the bottle of lube and squirts it over his dick, spreading the liquid with his other hand. Junhui groans and bucks into his hand and Mingyu looks at him eagerly. 

“That’s good, baby.” Junhui praises him and Mingyu preens. Then he sits on Junhui’s lap and hoists his hip up, guiding Junhui’s cock to his entrance with one hand while opening himself with the other.

Mingyu slowly sinks down, placing his hands on Junhui’s chest for support. Junhui encourages him by whispering praises and appreciation and Mingyu _thrives_ on strings of accolades.

Mingyu looks _bewitching._ He parts his lips which blossom from Junhui’s kisses and pokes his tongue out from the effort of restraining himself. He looks down at Junhui with blown-out pupils, his hair a wild tousle of black, few of the strands matted to his head by sweat. When he finally sits down on Junhui’s hips, the latter kneads his asscheeks softly, letting the man get used to his full length. 

“Fuck, you’re so big,” Mingyu says a little rapturously, circling his hips slightly to stretch himself more on Junhui’s cock. 

“You look magnificent, Mingyu.” Junhui croaks from his own dazed state. The effect Mingyu has on him is _phenomenal,_ to say the least.

Mingyu flattens his palm on his stomach and rubs it in a circular pattern. _“Here,_ Junhwi,” Junhui directs his gaze to his stomach. “This is where I feel you.” 

Junhui feels his chest constrict and his heart stops. It’s too much. Junhui gingerly raises his hands and Mingyu holds his wrist to guide it on his stomach. And Junhui _feels_ it through his fingertip. The slight bulge over his stomach is more than enough to have Junhui crumble completely. He is reduced to nothingness. _Annihilated by Mingyu._ Nothing else matters as long as they are together in the centre of his universe. 

_“Mingyu,”_ Junhui calls out his name desperately. It’s hard to differentiate whether his tone is demanding or pleading.

Mingyu builds a rhythm up slowly, the muscles on his thighs flexing from the exertion. Junhui is completely _lost_ in Mingyu’s eyes. The younger man’s gaze directed at him is unwavering and entrancing. It’s like he has finally found the purpose of his life. Only _complete devotion_ beams from his eyes. 

“Junhwi, more.” Mingyu groans. Junhui reaches for Mingyu’s waist and feels the hot skin sear his hands. He thrusts up very slowly and Mingyu loses his balance. He inclines his body backwards and plants his hands behind him. The way Mingyu rolls his hips makes Junhui wonder if he was made for some kind of stage. Junhui watches as beads of sweat trickle down from his neck and moves over his torso. He looks _beautiful._

“You are beautiful, Mingyu.” Junhui rasps as he tries to meet Mingyu’s pace, thrusting up gently. 

“You, too, _ah!_ I lo-like you so much, Jun!” Junhui blanks out for a second as he absorbs the words Mingyu said. For a brief moment, he thought Mingyu was about to say _love_ instead of _like._

Even before he can try to uproot Mingyu’s real feelings, the latter whines out of frustration and changes the angle by putting his heel down on the bed. Junhui heaves because this angle swipes all thoughts out of his mind and makes him groan in pleasure. Junhui tightens his hold around Mingyu’s body and practically makes him bounce on his cock, thrusting up intently. The voices out of Mingyu’s lips are like an alluring _symphony_ and he feels like his mind is cleansed.

_Freedom._ Junhui thinks Mingyu is a simulation of what freedom is supposed to feel like. A content life that depends on nothing.

“I can’t hold it! Let me come!” Mingyu begs. Junhui wraps his hand around the younger’s cock and strokes it fervently as he tries to keep up with his hard pace. With a particularly hard thrust, Mingyu flops over Junhui with a loud moan. Their bodies flush against each other and it’s warm and sweaty. Mingyu’s body trembles as he finally comes screaming Junhui’s name (with a bunch of English profanities in the mix). Junhui starts to feel the pleasure coiling inside his stomach on the verge of bursting out. His movements become rough and desperate and he soon follows after, closing his eyes shut and digging his nails on Mingyu’s lower back as he sees the stars behind his lids. 

They both try to catch their breaths by staying limp. Junhui feels his whole body shaking from the aftermath, his heartbeat too loud in his ears. With shaky hands, he brushes Mingyu’s hair away from his eyes and kisses his forehead and eyes. 

“Thank you.” Mingyu looks at him dumbly, confused by sudden words of gratitude.

“Why?” His voice sounds a little croaky, but he still manages to look adorable. Junhui places a kiss on his nose.

“For coming into my life.” Junhui tries to smile. As he comes down from his high, he realises the soreness in his whole body. Maybe he went a little _overboard_ with doing it twice, but it was probably the _best fuck_ of his life so it’s evened out at the end. 

With great efforts, they clean themselves up with a towel. Junhui removes the dirty bedding and throws it with the rest of their soiled clothes into the laundry. He haphazardly spreads the spare sheets he found in the cupboards. Meanwhile, Mingyu fixes a quick meal for himself. 

Satisfied with the completion of his tasks, Junhui limps his way towards the bed and gets comfortable on the soft mattress, letting it give the much-needed rest to his muscles. 

“Hyung? Are you going to sleep? What about sightseeing?” Mingyu asks as he makes his way to the bed as well. 

“Go by yourself. I’m going to sleep.” Junhui replies and turns away from Mingyu. The latter wraps himself around his back and Junhui nestles back into his body. 

“Rude! I’m not going to leave you.” Mingyu replies in a cute voice and leaves a few kisses on the back of Junhui’s head. It’s just a few words, but Junhui wants Mingyu to put a _lot of weight_ in them. The yearning of wanting to know what it feels like to have Mingyu has changed into wanting to spend the rest of his life with Mingyu.

“Then sleep,” Junhui whispers back. He’s warm in Mingyu’s embrace and feels like he’s blanketed by safety. Hence sleep overtakes his senses quite quickly. 

  
  


~•~

  
  


Mingyu wakes up to the incessant ringing of a phone that isn’t his. In his arms, he feels a body twitching until he opens his eyes and finds Junhui leaning away to grab his phone. Mingyu loosens his hold around Junhui making the latter easily reach over for his phone. 

“Hello?” Junhui says in a sleepy voice as he answers his phone. The time on his phone reads a little after one in the afternoon. Mingyu decides to caress Junhui’s naked neck and shoulder as the latter talks on the phone. Junhui seems to be talking to his mother. It’s a normal conversation, just some tidbits and anecdotes about each other’s lives. Strangely, it’s _heartwarming._

Mingyu ponders if he will ever get the opportunity to meet Junhui’s family. His first set of words would definitely be of gratitude towards his parents for having him. He’ll thank them for creating a _perfect_ man and bringing him in this _imperfect_ world. 

He is in love. His feelings for Junhui are so _pure_ that it surprises him. For the first time in a long while, Mingyu is sanguine about the outcome of his affair with Junhui. He just wants Junhui to be happy and he would do _anything_ to see that smile for the rest of his life. Junhui’s smile _lights_ up his world. It’s probably the way he smiles with his whole face that has Mingyu’s heart leaping out of his chest. The way his eyes crinkle and his cheeks become fuller giving rise to a heart-warming boxy smile.

These moments that he is sharing with Junhui are _precious_ and _beautiful._ They feel like pretty butterflies fluttering inside his body and leaving a sweet tingling sensation behind on his skin. 

He watches Junhui talk on the phone animatedly and dreams of a life where they live together. Waking up next to the elder with soft kisses. Getting ready for the day and making breakfast together. Giving sweet kisses to each other and leaving for their respective work. Writing and composing songs with Junhui on his mind. Coming back home and talking about each other’s day. And ending the night with whispered secrets and heated love. Essentially becoming an integral presence in the other’s life. Mingyu _dreams and dreams._

Junhui ends the call and looks at Mingyu with a kind smile. 

“What’s going on in your mind?” Junhui asks.

Mingyu wants to take Junhui away from the rest of the world and show him how he really feels.

“Hyung? Do you like wine and Andes?” 

“That is a very _specific_ question. Are you trying to suggest something?” Junhui asks dubiously as he sits up a little to look at Mingyu. 

“Actually, yes,” Mingyu sits up as well and reaches for Junhui’s hands. He plays with his fingers, trying to imprint the image of his hand in his head. “I know it’s going to sound foolish, but I suddenly have this urge of visiting Mendoza to tour the vineyards and trek around in the nearby mountains. And you’re here with me and I really, _really_ want to go there with you, hyung. Please.” Mingyu pleads. 

Junhui doesn’t say anything for a while. He remains frozen. Mingyu squeezes his hands a little and he jolts awake to reality. 

“I knew you were a spontaneous person, but I didn’t know it was to _this_ extent.” Junhui exaggerates the measure by dramatically extending his hands. 

“I promise I’ll make it the best adventure of your life!” Junhui looks at him with tired eyes. 

“Mingyu. Be realistic for just a second. Today is Monday and I am flying back to Seoul on Thursday night. We have no tickets or accommodations. Do you see the problem with your plan?” Junhui looks askance at Mingyu, clearly not amused by his childish plans.

Mingyu doesn’t see the problem. Mainly because Mingyu knows Minghao, the man who knows which strings to pull to get things done. He’s just one phone call away from getting a whole itinerary for Mendoza included with travel tickets and accommodation booking.

“We’ll leave tomorrow and return on Wednesday,” Mingyu assures Junhui.

“And how are you going to pull that off?”

“You leave that to me. So will you come with me? Just say a word. Yes or no?” Mingyu asks as he shifts closer to Junhui, trying to seek comfort in his warmth.

“No.”

“Okay, try to _change_ the word now.” 

“Mingyu–”

“Hyung! Trust me! Take a leap of faith!” Mingyu shakes Junhui’s body in excitement, hoping to get his elation transmitted into Junhui’s body. Junhui giggles but looks mildly apprehensive. He thinks for a bit as Mingyu keeps begging wordlessly through his actions.

“It’s ridiculous why I’m even thinking about this, but I’m willing to give you a chance here. I-I’m probably out of my mind.” Junhui murmurs while looking away from Mingyu. The latter understands the doubts circling inside Junhui’s mind. In all seriousness, no matter how strongly they both feel and no matter how strong their connection is, they _barely_ know each other, even if their hearts _scream_ otherwise. 

“You’re not. You’re perfectly sane,” Mingyu says as he tucks some stray hair behind Junhui’s ear. “That’s what makes it so beautiful. You always have to take some risk if you truly want to experience things and live.” Mingyu strokes Junhui’s jaw and lets his hand rest on the side of his face. Junhui leans in into his hand and hums with his eyes closed. It feels like he’s petting a cat. 

“You’re right,” Junhui says. A pause. “I trust you.”

_Trust._ It’s a heavy word. Trusting someone is like swimming in the waters. A person does not try to hold the water when they try to swim. Those actions mostly lead to harming oneself and result in drowning. A person can only swim if they relax and let their body float over the mighty waters. Trusting someone is not about just making bonds with each other. It’s about letting a comfortable space flow between two people.

Earning someone’s trust is just as precious as receiving that person’s love. One can _love completely_ and _give selflessly_ only if there is trust in their relationship.

Mingyu connects their lips and feels the weight of Junhui’s lips on his. It’s soft and grounding. Exactly what he has been longing for all his life. 

“I trust you, too. I trust you with my life.” Mingyu whispers.

“Don’t get sappy.” Junhui teases. Mingyu starts tickling Junhui’s body in retaliation and the room gets filled with their breathless laughter.

After a while, Mingyu decides to go out and fetch some takeout for the two. They already have plans to watch the football match in the evening and meet Seokmin so they decide to stay in till sunset. 

“Hyung?”

“Yes?” Junhui sits on the sofa in the living room, mindlessly using his phone. 

“Ah, I need to click the picture of your passport so that my contact can book your tickets as well.” Mingyu stutters a little. He is aware that his sentence sounds _fishy._ But Junhui does not seem to think in the direction he is thinking and without any questions, goes inside the room and hands him his passport. 

Mingyu quickly clicks the picture and then after exchanging a few words, he leaves for a nearby restaurant. On his way to the place, he dials Minghao’s number and waits for him to pick up.

“What do you want?” Minghao does not trouble himself with any formalities. He always gets _straight_ to the point.

“Why do you think I want something?” Mingyu asks and feels a little aggrieved. 

“You only call _willingly_ if either you want me to do something or you’re in trouble and need my help getting out. If it was the latter, then I would’ve known beforehand.” Minghao explains. At the end of the day, Minghao easily sees through Mingyu. 

“Yeah, I need your help,” Mingyu drops his defences. “I wanna go to Mendoza.”

“The wine province? I’ll see the next available flight ticket and talk to someone to get you a low-key place to stay.” Minghao says in a matter of fact voice. 

“Two tickets.” Mingyu amends his choice of words. As expected, the line goes dead silent as Minghao tries to process his words. Mingyu keeps the phone close to his ear as he navigates his way down the street. 

“This is unbelievable. Did you fucking _marry_ that friend of yours and now you want me to book your _honeymoon?”_ Minghao yells through the phone. Mingyu expected a lot of things but not those set of words necessarily. In his state of surprise, he collides with a few people and trips over his own feet. 

“Can you do it or not?” Mingyu asks instead. 

“Are you married or not?” Minghao counters.

Mingyu reaches the restaurant and reads through the menu while trying to choose the right words to speak to Minghao. 

“Minghao, I am very serious about this guy,” Mingyu admits in a low voice. 

“Alright. Sounds reasonable. But have you thought about what will happen once both of you have to go in different directions?” Minghao puts forward the _million-dollar question._ Mingyu asks his manager to wait for a few minutes on the line as he orders his food for takeaway. 

The question still rings in his head as he settles down on a table nearby to wait for his order. Mingyu wants to live in his fantasies for as long as possible. _Forever_ if fate allows it. But at the end of the day, he is aware that both Junhui and he will need to make some adult decisions. Most of all, Mingyu needs to reveal his _real identity_ to Junhui and let the man see his demons. 

“Did you forget that I was on the call?” Minghao’s voice blares from the speaker of his phone. In the background, he hears the tapping of the keys. Minghao must be on his laptop.

“No. Can you please book the hotel and tickets for now? I don’t want to talk about this right now.” Mingyu begs. He starts picking at a tissue paper with his nails. 

“Of course, I can. I need his identification.” Mingyu quickly swipes the call screen up and sends the pictures of Junhui’s passport to Minghao. 

“Wen Junhui? Huh! I thought he was Korean.” Minghao comments as the tapping of keys get louder. 

“He is a Chinese living in South Korea.”

“Hmm.” Minghao stays silent for a few seconds. Mingyu gets called for his order and he stands up to fetch it. As he steps outside into the blaring sunlight, he hears Minghao gasp which is followed by something dropping on his end. 

“What happened?” Mingyu asks curiously.

“Nothing. Just googled your _husband.”_

“What did you see?” He chooses to ignore that Minghao still addressed Junhui as his husband. It is the least of his problems at the moment. Minghao breaks out into laughter. It sounds like a forced one like he is trying to _mock_ Mingyu. 

“You choose to keep him in the dark about your own identity. But you still have the _gall_ to inquire about his identity?” Minghao asks in a very light, teasing tone. Nonetheless, a shadow of guilt darkens Mingyu’s eyes.

“He likes me without knowing my reputation. Forgive me for seeking happiness for a little while.” Mingyu replies in a monotonous voice. 

“Are you in love with him?” Mingyu sighs heavily. The answer is on the tip of his tongue. Yes, yes. _A million times yes._ Junhui’s question from their first night comes into his mind. Even he asked whether Mingyu had ever been in love. It’s comical how Mingyu’s answer changed from a no to a yes in mere two days' time. 

Mingyu remains silent. It’s deafening.

“No. How is that even possible? You barely know each other! Mingyu, we’ve worked so hard to get you out of the dark place. We can’t–” Minghao quickly corrects himself. “I can’t afford to lose you again. You are too important.” Minghao rushes to get his words out and some of them merge into one. Mingyu still _understands_ his concern.

“Thank you. It’s nice to know you care, Minghao,” Mingyu didn’t realise, but he had already reached the house he’s currently sharing with Junhui. He stands in front of the main door, contemplating his life while listening to Minghao lecture him. 

_“Mingyu.”_ Minghao tries to admonish him one last time. 

“It’ll work out. Did you book it?” Mingyu tries to divert the conversation.

“I’ll mail you everything once it’s done.” 

“Okay, I gotta go. Thank you for doing this!” Mingyu quickly tries to end the call. He’d much rather spend more time with Junhui than get lectured by Minghao. 

“Mingyu! Tell him the truth.” 

“I will. I know I have to. I can’t hide it forever.” Mingyu mutters under his breath. 

An air of despondency surrounds him as he climbs upstairs. Before he rings the bell, he hears the rich and mellow sound of piano resonating behind the walls of the apartment. It’s calming and gives him the _strength_ to bury his torment for the time being. He rings the bell and hears the music stopped abruptly. After a moment, Junhui opens the door and greets him with a _blinding_ smile. He breathes in honey, musk and patchouli and all his worries dissolve in thin air. The _fresh wave of wind_ that is Junhui greets him heartily.

  
  


~•~

  
  


Junhui thinks he is a versatile man who has interests in almost every single field. He wants to put an emphasis on the word _almost._ That’s because Junhui has absolutely zero fascination with sports. He has lived a comfortably normal life without participating in any kind of physical recreation. That was until he met Mingyu, a man who loves sports. All kinds of them really. At last, everything was _too good_ to be true. They had to have some kind of conflicting interests. That’s how things are meant to naturally _balance_ out between the two.

“Do we really have to go? I feel like we should rest for the day as we have to travel tomorrow.” Junhui tries to negotiate by raising a reasonable concern for a change. 

“Seokmin is waiting for us, hyung. It’ll be rude if we don’t show up.” Mingyu informs him while trying to find appropriate clothes to wear. According to Seokmin, they are allowed to wear anything as long as the colours are not red and white or blue and yellow. This is to ensure their neutrality and save them from becoming a part of a gruesome brawl after the football match. 

Junhui sighs defeatedly and trudges towards his luggage to find some clothes. Mingyu being the kind soul he is, instantly senses Junhui’s mood.

“We can cancel if you want,” Mingyu speaks very carefully, clearly scared of angering Junhui in any way. It’s a sweet gesture, Junhui won’t lie. But the pout on Mingyu’s face clearly depicts that the younger is very excited to see the match. Junhui ratiocinates their day and surmises that they stayed inside the house all day, _fucking_ in the morning and _sleeping_ in the afternoon. He thinks there is no harm in going outside in the evening and watching 22 men rollick around on a field wearing shorts. He is a _mutable_ man.

“No! It’s all about experiencing new things. Let’s go!” Junhui announces and rummages through his luggage for anything that isn’t white. 

They both get ready and ride an Uber to _La Bombonera,_ Boca Juniors’ home stadium. The Superclasico is a football match between River Plate and Boca Juniors. Junhui has no clue about either of the teams. 

As they walk towards the gates, Junhui sees the sea of people wearing blue and yellow jerseys, the colours of Boca Juniors. He feels a little lost in the crowd, but Mingyu grips his hand and interlocks their fingers and the warmth helps _ease_ his nerves. As long as he is with Mingyu, he knows that he has nothing to be scared of. He leans in closer and leaves a chaste kiss on his shoulder. Mingyu is momentarily surprised and looks at him funny.

“I thought you _hated_ PDA,” There is a smirk evident on his face. 

“Yeah, but I like you too much to care.” Junhui gives an honest answer. There is no inhibition. In a way, he does not have the _luxury_ to play games anymore. 

Junhui has a rational way of thinking. He knows the situation they both have. He is worried about their future. They barely have _three days_ left together until Junhui takes a flight back to Seoul. No matter what they feel for each other, they can’t foolishly _give up_ on other priorities in life for love. Junhui is the son of a businessman. He was raised to make decisions while looking at the _pros and cons_ of a situation. He knows where to look in difficult circumstances and he will always look at the side where the field has _brown patches_ in it. 

But all his problems boil down to one thing. _Junhui is in love with Mingyu._ It’s the plain and simple truth. 

Everything about Mingyu is magical. Junhui feels like his world has turned around completely. He tells Mingyu things that he hasn’t shared with another soul and the latter _absorbs_ everything and _craves_ to hear even more. Mingyu somehow builds him up and he sees himself through the younger’s eyes. Junhui sees the things that make him special and beautiful and he falls apart down to his core from the realisation. He simply loves Mingyu without _knowing how, or when, or from where._

Mingyu bends down a little and brings his lips close to Junhui’s ears, “I like you a lot, Junhwi. If only you knew how much I do.”

Junhui thinks he knows just how much it is. The fact is _clear as a crystal_ that Mingyu loves him back. Maybe the other man is agitated about their future as well. At least Junhui can relate to that. 

They soon find Seokmin waiting for the two with a bunch of his friends. Seokmin has this _bright smile_ that is able to lift people’s spirits. It’s actually quite interesting because Seokmin has a very manly and handsome face that seems a bit unapproachable but as soon as he dons a smile, it’s like people are attracted to him like bees flying over to flowers. 

“Hey! It’s nice to see you two again,” Seokmin greets them benevolently. ”Did you dye your hair?” Seokmin asks Junhui. 

“Yeah, it was my penalty.” He answers. Seokmin looks at Mingyu _suspiciously_ but doesn’t comment further. 

“Are you ready for the game?” 

While Mingyu excitedly says yes, Junhui mutters a defeated no. Seokmin looks at him with concern. 

“Jun hyung? You don’t watch football?” 

“I never had the chance to engage myself in the sport,” Junhui answers nonchalantly.

“Oh boy! You are in for a ride. A heads up. If the team that wears red and white shoots a goal, _do not_ cheer or else you will _never_ get to see the light of the next day.” Seokmin goes deadly serious and Junhui feels _chills_ up his spine. Then all of a sudden he smiles with all his teeth and Junhui experiences a _whiplash._ He meekly nods and after a little more chit chat, they all enter the stadium. 

The sea of blue and yellow _roars_ in front of him as he walks towards their seat. There are a few sections where red and white dominate, but it’s mostly a zilch in comparison to the local fans. It’s loud. _Too loud._ The excitement and anticipation are enthralling. The fans sing and chant for their teams. The adrenaline is _infectious_ and Junhui can’t help but join in with others. He’s handed thundersticks and Junhui eagerly hits them together in sync with the chanting of the fans. 

Seokmin’s friend brings them light beer and they all sip the drink while making small talk. Mingyu looks like an excited kid in a candy shop. He actively talks to everyone and talks in football lingo that goes over Junhui’s head. But all in all, Mingyu looks happy and it appeases Junhui’s heart. 

Finally, the 22 players jog to the field and after taking their positions, the referee blows the whistle. It’s electrifying and tense. It is a _fast and furious_ affair. Everything is action-packed with drama and tension. The insults thrown by the opposing fans are even more _entertaining_ than the game itself. Junhui tries to familiarise himself with the game in the first 45 minutes. By the end of the first half, the referee blows the whistle and the players disperse off the field. 

“Are you having fun?” Mingyu turns toward him and asks. His face is red with excitement and a layer of sweat makes him glow under the floodlights. His gentle eyes sparkle. Mingyu looks beautiful. 

“Yeah, it isn’t as bad as I thought it would be,” Junhui replies. 

“Jun hyung! You already look like a natural. I heard your screams when Boca Juniors scored. It’s not that bad, is it?” Seokmin asks from Mingyu’s other side. Junhui agrees. Maybe there is something in the air that gives him so much energy, but it feels _amazing._ It also feels like a good way of relieving a lot of stress. Junhui didn’t know he was missing something until he experienced this. 

Junhui gets way into the game in the second half. He yells and chants with the locals like it’s his _own boys_ playing on the field. The near-misses and penalty shots have Junhui’s heart beating crazily. At one point, a player shoots the ball inside the goal, but the referee blows his whistle and it isn’t counted as a goal. 

“What the hell? It was a fucking goal! Why didn’t they accept it?” Junhui screams in frustration. Mingyu looks at him with a coy smile. He gently places his arm across Junhui’s shoulders and pulls the latter’s body towards him. 

“It was offside.” Junhui looks at him quizzically because of course, he doesn’t understand the meaning of it. Mingyu clears his throat while trying to school in his laughter. “A player is considered offside if he receives the ball while being beyond the opposing defender.” 

“That’s fucking stupid.” Junhui counters.

“It is a _controversial_ law,” Mingyu replies. The coy smile, on the other hand, grows wider. 

“What’s so funny?” 

“Nothing. You’re just _too cute,_ hyung and I want to kiss you so badly, but unfortunately, we are in a public place.” Mingyu comments gaily. Junhui feels his heart skip a beat and he burrows his head in Mingyu’s shoulders to hide his red face from people.

Eventually, the game ends and the home team, Boca Juniors win. The whole stadium goes absolutely crazy and Junhui is _drunk off_ the victory celebrations.

“Hey! Wanna join us for dinner?” Seokmin asks the couple once they exit the stadium and reach the streets. 

“Ah, that’s extremely kind of you, but we have an early flight to catch tomorrow.” Mingyu notifies Seokmin. The latter’s eyes go wide and his face pales. 

“You both are leaving the country tomorrow?” His high-pitched voice pierces through the busy chatter around them. 

“No. We are going to Mendoza.” Junhui speaks. Seokmin looks at them thoughtfully for a moment before he looks at them hopefully. 

“Are you guys finally together?” 

Both Junhui and Mingyu look at each other helplessly. 

Do they like each other?

_Yes._

Have they slept together?

_Fuck, yes._

Is there mutual love between them?

_Probably, yes._

But are they together?

_They haven't discussed it yet._

Seokmin looks at them expectantly and Junhui thinks that there is no point in stalling.

“Yeah, we are together.” The moment Junhui ends his sentence, Seokmin hoots and claps his hands to celebrate the fact that they are together. 

“Honestly, looking at people like you makes me believe that love _still_ exists. You both are _perfect_ for each other and I am so happy!” Seokmin rejoices. “Like the moment when I saw you guys on Friday, it just felt _wrong_ that you weren’t together.”

Junhui remains speechless as he rubs his clammy hands and Mingyu pats Seokmin’s shoulder in a friendly manner, trying to change the topic. It’s a weird thing to discuss with an outsider. The thing is both Junhui and Mingyu _accept_ that some mysterious forces brought them together. _Destiny._ Their relationship feels surrealistic. _Enchanting. Magnetising. Electric._

After exchanging a few more words, Junhui and Mingyu take an Uber back to their house. After reaching the house, they pack for their _2 days & 1 night _ trip to Mendoza. 

As far as Junhui knows, the place is famous for its Malbec wine and panoramic views of the Andes. He isn’t too keen on tasting the wine, but he is _excited_ to explore the mountains and lose himself to the beauty of nature with Mingyu.

Mingyu lays on the bed after finishing his nighttime routine as Junhui comes back from the bathroom after brushing his teeth. He jumps on the bed and Mingyu easily catches him and traps him in his arms. _Domestic._ It feels too domestic. Mingyu’s presence calms him and saves him from his dire thoughts. 

Junhui has dreams, but he can’t dare to run towards them because he knows, _he knows_ it will break him into millions of pieces and he won’t be able to piece them back together again. 

Junhui wonders how long he can _ignore_ reality and _bask_ in a love that feels right. A love that finally makes him _understand_ the measure of infinity. A love that makes him _realise_ that home could be something that isn’t always made by bricks and mortar but also by skin and bones. 


	6. Day 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this update is a bit late but thank you for being patient with me. i have been mentally exhausted lately and as much as i love this fic, it is emotionally taxing to write.  
> anyway, there is this scene in this chapter that solely drove me to write this fic in the first place.  
> as cliche as it may seem, if you know,  
> you know.

_Mingyu is standing in the middle of an empty stage with a mic stand placed in front of him and an electric guitar hanging off his shoulder by the strap. The spotlight shines harshly over him and blinds him. He can barely see anything in front of him. He looks around a bit to search for his fellow bandmates or any other person really, but he can’t even hear a faint noise of someone breathing let alone finding another human._

_The knowledge that he might be alone inside a very big stadium makes his blood grow cold. He starts sweating, maybe from the severity of the lights or maybe from unwarrantable fear, he can’t distinguish any more. The sweat trickles down his face and Mingyu is able to veil some tears with it that he sheds in his vulnerable state._

_As he continues to stand frozen on the stage, the lights slowly dim out. The view in front of him is already unusual. It feels like he’s wearing blue-tinted glasses because everything is coloured in shades of blue. Shavings of mist fill the stadium, and they start to take the shape of people. Hundreds of people. They stand in front of Mingyu in the form of apparitions. Ghosts. Their blank expressions terrify Mingyu, but his feet are stuck to the ground, hence he can’t run away from the horror show._

_As they all finally incarnate into distinct appearances, they start to float one by one towards Mingyu and start to criticise him right on his face._

_“You are a waste of an artist!”_

_“You can’t even stand properly without snorting coke up your nose! Pathetic!”_

_“Dude, you abandoned me with all the dope when the cops raided the club. Fuck you!”_

_“You trashed the hotel room and threw the chair out the window. Two hotel staff got hurt because of your recklessness!”_

_“You always have to get your dick wet, right? You cheating piece of shit! Get out of my house!”_

_“You instigated your fans to start a riot right in the middle of a concert. Do you have any self-conscience?”_

_“The only good thing about you is your talent in music. I can’t wait to wake up to the news of you dying in a hotel room from an overdose or some other preposterous means.”_

_“My son just spent a night with you and he is in the hospital because god knows what you did to him. You will pay for your sins!”_

_“Jade, stop trying to be a god.”_

_Mingyu wants to run away. He reminds himself again and again that all of it is not real. But his sensitive heart can’t ignore the sharp words thrown at his face. The fear crawls up his back and settles over his shoulders. It’s heavy and weighs him down till he feels his legs give out and falls down to his knees._

_‘It’s not what it seems.’_

_‘It’s not what I think.’_

_‘It’s only in my mind.’_

_‘I must be dreaming.’_

_He repeats these lines inside his head as his body droops on the stage, and he sits with his head hung low. He lets all the sins that he has carried with him for so long flow down onto the stage with his tears._

_It is never too late to repent._

_“Why are you crying?” Jihoon’s voice rings in his ears. Mingyu hastily raises his head to find Jihoon walking towards him from the wings. He is wearing a tracksuit and baseball cap, his everyday “work clothes”, and has a taunting smile on his face. A wave of minor relief washes over Mingyu until it ebbs away and his self-hatred comes back._

_“They all hate me.” He weakly replies. Jihoon takes a seat beside him and looks at the crowd of ghosts._

_“If you were so badly hated, then why are people still buying our music?” Jihoon asks._

_“They love your craft.”_

_“They love our craft,” Jihoon corrects him. “It's a team effort, Mingoo.” Mingyu takes a deep breath and lets Jihoon’s comforting voice soothe his mind. Jihoon’s existence in his life brings him solace._

_Mingyu has always looked up to Jihoon. Back when he was a nobody in Seattle, trying to play the guitar just for fun, Jihoon approached him and asked whether he could sing. When Mingyu gave an affirmative response, the elder instantly asked him to join his band. Mingyu thought that he was dreaming but agreed without any hesitance because he never thought that a band formed by high school boys will take them to the world stage and make them rockstars._

_But the fact that Jihoon is one of the very few who has seen Mingyu’s best and worst sides can never be changed._

_“What are they saying?” Jihoon asks out of curiosity._

_“I don’t know. I muted their voices.”_

_“Wow! Must be nice to be this powerful.” Jihoon comments with an impressed look on his face._

_“It’s just a dream, Ji.”_

_“Then why did you summon me in your dream?” Jihoon’s voice sounds sharp. Mingyu turns his head only to find a blank expression on the other’s face._

_“I miss you,” Mingyu breaks into a fit of wailing. “I was scared and your presence always manages to calm me down.”_

_Jihoon hums in his response. Mingyu cries till his heart feels a bit light. He lets his tears dry up and looks up to see the ghosts. They all have stopped throwing venom on his face. Although now, they look at him with pure contempt in their eyes. Mingyu takes a few deep breaths and turns around to look at Jihoon who seems to be having a staring contest with one of the ghosts._

_“Something is bothering you, but I don’t think it’s truly these people’s words. They are connected somehow but it is not the main problem here.” Jihoon says with a casual tone while still looking at the shapes of the apparitions._

_“Their words define who I am. It will haunt me for the rest of my life.” Mingyu replies with a weak voice._

_“Hmm,” Jihoon replies indignantly. Mingyu tries to be more coherent with his problems._

_“Don’t you get it? My karma will never let me be happy again!” Mingyu persists with his paranoia and hopes Jihoon will understand his plight._

_“Beating yourself up over the mistakes of the past isn’t going to make things easier for you. Don’t forget that your dark side makes you whole. Anyway, have you done anything that falls under the definition of your “bad” this year?” Jihoon asks with an exasperated sigh. Mingyu scavenges his memories to find some delinquent activity he committed this year but comes up with nothing._

_“No,” Mingyu mumbles while picking his nails._

_“Argh! Mingyu, stop talking in circles and just say it out loud!” Jihoon yells at him with an agitated voice._

_“I’m scared he’ll leave me!” Mingyu finally screams and breaks down like a fragile glass. His eyes are squeezed shut and he clenches his teeth. The silence surrounds them both and Mingyu thinks that maybe Jihoon left him. That is until he hears him say a single word._

_“Junhwi?” Mingyu opens his eyes wide and looks at Jihoon with awe._

_“How do you know his name?”_

_“Because this is a dream, and I am not really Jihoon but your conscience.”_

_Mingyu decides to not ask more stupid questions because Jihoon is right. But he still wants to lighten the weight in his heart, so he relays his biggest fear at the moment._

_“He likes me a lot. Probably loves me. I know that and I treasure that because heaven knows how much I love him. But I’m so scared, Ji. I really don’t think he’ll even like me let alone be in love if he knew about my past.” Mingyu’s words seem to echo in the stadium that is still filled with the ghosts in front of him. Eerily enough, they all have started to glow in faint purple hues and Mingyu thinks that his dream is probably phasing towards a nightmare. He hears Jihoon make a sound of disapproval by clicking his tongue on his upper teeth._

_“Mingyu. Nobody is supposed to like you for your past. If they claim to do so, then maybe they have some serious issues that I as an unprofessional shouldn’t be commenting on. But if they care as much as I do, or even more, then they are going to accept your past faults and work with you so that you never go back to your old, evil ways.” Listening to Jihoon’s comforting words feels like drinking a cup of hot chocolate in front of a fireplace in the middle of a biting snow day. It’s warm and assuring but also hopeful and sweet. “You’ve started to mildly believe in fate and destiny, right?”_

_“Yeah. He makes everything so believable.”_

_“Then don’t give up.” A smile breaks on Mingyu’s face as he hears Jihoon speak those words. Maybe Jihoon is right. He just needs to cement the feelings between Junhui and him. If the bond between them is tied with an unbreakable rope, then Junhui will not run away if he exposes his demons to him. Mingyu wants to be honest with Junhui. He imagines if Junhui accepts him for who he is, then the elder would shun the ghosts standing in front of him and give him the comfort that he seeks. Junhui is too good to be true._

_‘Mingyu.’ He hears Junhui’s melodic voice call his name. He barks a fond laugh._

_“I’m so madly in love with Junhwi that I even hear his voice echo in this stadium.” He muses to himself._

_“Yeah, I don’t think that voice belongs to this dream, Mingoo.” Jihoon comments. Mingyu squints his eyes and looks at Jihoon._

_“What did you say?” Jihoon looks at him with the rarest of his small smiles along with a content nod._

_‘Mingyu!’_

  
  


He wakes up abruptly only to find Junhui looking at him with mild agitation. His heart is racing and it almost feels like it’s pounding inside his chest and doing a crazy dance. His body also feels shaky, and he’s heaving as if his throat was relaxed for too long and his windpipe is finally constricted and open. His condition makes him scared and confused. 

“Mingyu? Oh, no! Mingyu, it’s okay. I’m so sorry for waking you up so suddenly.” Junhui enclasps Mingyu’s hands in his own and rubs them together to transfer warmth. He lightly kisses his forehead and eyes and the fear and concern for Mingyu’s well-being in his eyes calms the younger down. 

Coincidentally, Mingyu has woken up a lot of times like this. His muscle memory usually made him reach for the bottle of Valium kept on his side table. Popping the pills took away the anxiety, and he felt better instantly. But that was _before_ Mingyu went into drug rehabilitation.

Now, the comfort that Junhui provides feels _better_ than all the pills he had. In all simple terms, Junhui is like a drug, and he is completely addicted. He desires to experience the euphoric effects of Junhui’s love but at the same time, he desires to avoid the withdrawal aspect of abstinence. 

“Do you feel better?” Junhui asks while stroking his hair. His movements are firm but tender. Mingyu reaches for his hand and drags it down to his face to leave a kiss full of _gratitude_ on Junhui’s _warm_ palm. 

“Yes. I feel amazing.” Mingyu looks at Junhui with an intense gaze. Colour starts to bloom on Junhui’s cheeks and he breaks eye contact. Mingyu is going to die soon and the cause of his death will be _Wen Junhui’s cuteness._

“If you feel fine then get ready, sleepyhead. Do you know how _long_ I’ve been trying to wake you up for?” Mingyu finally wakes a little more and notices that Junhui is wearing proper clothes and his face looks fresh. 

“Get ready for what?” Mingyu asks through his drowsy state of mind. Junhui looks up at the ceiling and closes his eyes. He mutters some indistinct words and then pulls Mingyu out of the bed. 

“Our flight departs in exactly _two hours_ and we still have to reach the airport which is half an hour away. On top of that, you aren’t even ready! Don’t test me in the morning, Kim Mingyu!” Mingyu finally _remembers_ the spontaneous excursion they planned yesterday as he gets pushed towards the bathroom. Junhui closes the door behind him with a slam. Mingyu mentally sorts out the things he needs to do. 

First things first. He turns around and opens the bathroom door to find Junhui sitting on the edge of the bed. He stalks his way towards the elder and grabs his neck and bends down to steal a passionate kiss from his lips. He doesn’t prolong it and it feels tamer than the other kisses they’ve had. But it is _wonderful_ in its own unique way and Mingyu etches the feeling of Junhui’s lips over his at dawn. Even before the sun comes up and it’s still dark outside. 

Mingyu wants to create all these _first times_ with Junhui and cherish them as if they were his _last._

He breaks the kiss to find Junhui looking a bit dazed and confused. _Adorable._ Junhui’s taste lingers on his tongue and it brings in a rush. Even when it’s dark outside, Junhui tastes like _sunshine._ The dawn will break in a few moments and the fleeting moment will come when the sun kisses the moon. But with Junhui’s love, _colours_ have already dispersed in the atmosphere and lit the darkness around Mingyu. 

“I needed that. You are _better_ than coffee. Give me 20 minutes and you’ll find me ready to leave at the front door.” Mingyu announces and skips towards the bathroom with a light heart. 

  
  


One way or another, they make it to the airport before the check-in for their flight closes. The flight takes almost two hours to reach Mendoza, and they both mostly doze off the entire journey and catch up on their remaining sleep. 

Their flight lands around 9 am and as they finally walk outside the terminal gates after claiming their baggage, the first thing Mingyu feels is the relative temperature drop from Buenos Aires. It’s then that Mingyu remembers that it is _winter_ in the Southern Hemisphere. He takes out his jacket from his bag and watches Junhui wear a grey pullover. He looks so _soft_ and _cosy._ Mingyu wants to cuddle him and shower him with so much affection. 

Mingyu thinks that Minghao is _too good_ at doing his job. The fact that he was able to get the flight tickets and the accommodation booking in such a ridiculously short amount of time is commendable in itself. But even after doing all that, Minghao likes to stay ahead in the game (and also try to help Mingyu keep his anonymity in check). And this is why the two men are being driven 80 kilometres south-west of Mendoza for another hour or so to reach their destination for the day. 

Minghao booked a suite room of a specially curated ranch in the middle of nowhere. Talk about trying to _not_ show off his wealth and status to Junhui. But Mingyu can not argue, and he is willing to make some stupid excuse like a celebrity owes him or something because in the end, he gets to have Junhui all to himself and it is something that he _craves_ a lot. 

“Excuse me! Can you please stop the car?” Junhui requests the chauffeur in a hurry. Mingyu, who was busy looking out the window and clicking photos of the mountain trail turns to see what the commotion is all about. The chauffeur dutifully pulls up the car to the side and Junhui rushes out of the car and runs to the direction they came from. 

“Oh! It must be the llamas.” The chauffeur muses enthusiastically.

_“Llamas?”_ Mingyu absorbs the word in shock and registers the shape of the gentle and affectionate animal in his head. He mimics Junhui and bolts out of the car at a lightning-fast speed. 

The sight in front of him is spectacular. _Wonderful._ Too good to be true. The Andes look magnificent all around them. There are green pastures and a few gravelly rock beds surrounding them. On either side of the unpaved road, there are wooden fences. And it is the only thing that is separating Junhui and the herd of llamas that seem _too eager_ for his affection. He gently strokes their head and the llamas’ hum in return. Mingyu’s fingers _itch_ to capture the moment, and he snaps a few shots of Junhui. 

“Stop clicking my pictures and come and greet them, Mingyu-yah!” Junhui calls for him and looks at him with an excited smile. His happiness is infectious, and he looks like a child who is too happy to receive simple things in life. 

Mingyu joins him and tries to reach for a llama. But all the ones that are near him lay their ears back and start to groan. Junhui calmly analyses the scene in front of him and then pulls Mingyu away from the fence. The llamas _instantly_ stop groaning. 

“They are scared of you.” Junhui simply comments as he waves his farewell and starts guiding Mingyu back towards the car. Of course, they are scared. Apparently, they were able to _smell_ Mingyu’s fucked up past. This is _karma_ and Mingyu should _accept_ it instead of being miserable.

Instead, he gets to have Junhui sit close to him for the remaining ride. The elder strokes his thigh in comfort and holds one of his hands to appease his bad mood and share his own glorious warmth with the younger. Mingyu can’t complain much after that. 

They reach the ranch that is located on a serene valley and the first word that comes to his mind is _magical._ There is something about the air, Mingyu thinks, that is intrinsically idyllic. It’s a beautiful sunny morning with fluffy white clouds adorning the blue skies and all one can see are beautiful green hills stretching out to infinity. _Scenic. Spectacular._ They are greeted by the family who owns the ranch and Mingyu sees a couple of men riding on horses in the background. The clopping sound of the horses’ hooves hitting the ground is distant but mellifluous nonetheless. 

The owner tells them that the ranch only has six rooms out of which only two are occupied. _Secluded. Peaceful. Exclusive._ The couple reaches their room and jumps on the bed out of exhaustion. Even though it was a short transit, fatigue is something that comes naturally, and they both lay down on the bed and replenish their energy so that they can enjoy the rest of the day. The staff provide them with coffee and local pastry. While they both demolish the breakfast, they are given the options of activities they can do throughout the day. 

“Oh, horses!” Junhui exclaims excitedly.

“You want to ride horses?” Mingyu asks. There is the signature glint in Junhui’s eyes but it looks significantly gentler. Mingyu realises it's more out of exhilaration than the mischief which is exactly why he feels bolder. He wants to try to tease Junhui for a _change._

“Yeah, obviously! Did you see the horses outside? It’ll be fun!” 

“I bet riding a horse won’t give you as much enjoyment as riding me would.” Junhui’s breath hitches as he glares at Mingyu and his face changes colour into a brilliant shade of red. Mingyu is glad that the staff can’t speak Korean because seeing Junhui change his facial expression is _priceless._ This extremely _trivial_ victory over making Junhui fluster feels _monumental._ That is until Junhui calms down and squints his eyes _devilishly._

“That mouth on you– aren’t you getting too cocky, baby?” Junhui looks at him with a challenge and that damn mischievous glint is back in those beautiful brown eyes. “If you _promise_ to behave then tonight you’ll have me on my knees, Kim Mingyu.” 

Mingyu should’ve seen this coming. Should’ve really known that Junhui is capricious and unpredictable. But Mingyu loves this _wild side_ of Junhui. More than anything, _Mingyu loves Junhui._ And he wants to run off to the hills and scream at the top of his lungs and let the whole world know. 

Mingyu knows that Junhui is his only hope for salvation. Junhui makes him want to throw away his name and live a crazy and fulfilling life with him. He knows Junhui will take his pain away. In fact, sometimes, Junhui makes him _forget_ that he is a bloody rockstar which is a good thing according to Mingyu. He is willing to give over his _destiny_ to the other man. 

Mingyu lets out a defeated sigh and turns to the staff who is patiently waiting for an answer with a quizzical look on his face because he can’t understand the couple’s conversation. 

“We would like to do some horse riding before lunch and would be grateful if you could assist us.”

It’s going to be a long day. He’s already made so many memories with Junhui. But he is excited to make even more _beautiful memories_ with him.

Their serendipitous meeting in the street of San Telmo feels like a lifetime ago.

  
  


~•~

  
  


In all aspects, Junhui should be concerned about a few things in his life. For one, he knows that something is troubling Wonwoo but the latter is being a stubborn idiot and keeping Junhui in the dark. To top it all off, Junhui talked to Wonwoo at the airport in Buenos Aires when the couple were waiting for their boarding call. He had predicted that Wonwoo would be _unhappy_ with the revelation of new events that happened in Junhui’s life the previous day. The conversation wasn’t easy and everything just went _downhill_ from there.

Wonwoo was absolutely against the idea of him being with Mingyu, to begin with. So it was not shocking that the news of him sleeping with Mingyu and then travelling with him to a different city gave Wonwoo a _heart attack._ He really did try to lessen the blow by distracting Wonwoo with sweet words and dragging him down the memory lane of their friendship. 

Unfortunately, Wonwoo was _livid_ and _pissed_ beyond belief and ended the call in rage. A few minutes later, Junhui got a few messages from Wonwoo. 

  
  


**Wonu 😻**

** Wonu 😻 [06:56]: **

Don’t talk to me until you have seen the error of your ways, Moon Junhwi. 

And I swear if you get killed, I will drag you back from the depths of hell. 

You are not allowed to die yet 

So stay safe and vigilant 

Do it for me, Jun-ah 

  
  


Junhui was immensely _touched_ by Wonwoo’s concern and words but talking to him, for now, is out of the question. He _can_ talk to Wonwoo as the latter vaguely suggested in his veiled words, but then he’ll have to leave Mingyu. And just the _thought_ of leaving Mingyu stirs a very bitter feeling deep inside his stomach. It makes him feel nauseous and extremely horrible so Junhui doesn’t entertain those thoughts much. Even though he should be greatly _concerned_ about those thoughts as well because as he sees it, their separation is inevitable in a few days time. 

The conflict between the two emotions is enough to drive a human insane. But Junhui chooses to bury them for the time being and pretends that he isn’t standing on a frozen lake while the warm spring winds are just around the corner, waiting to _melt_ the surface beneath his feet. 

Mingyu walks out of the bathroom in his fresh change of clothes and Junhui feels like he’s falling deeper in love if that is even possible. Junhui wonders how a person like Mingyu is able to rock a Bohemian style even in the cold highlands of the Andes. He wears an oversized argyle brown cardigan over a white top and pairs it with a questionable choice of satin cream pants. He lets a necklace dangle from his neck and manages to make Junhui’s heart flutter and swell with adoration. 

Mingyu is beautiful. He is sure that the world can see it. But there is a specific side of his beauty that Junhui thinks only he is able to see. The _light_ in Mingyu’s heart. It’s stunning. Junhui is able to _see_ and _feel_ the honest and transparent emotions that Mingyu has and the elder feels like he’s on _top of the world._

They walk a little further away from the lodge to the corral and find three horses already ready to be ridden with leather style saddles tacked on their back. 

“Can you both ride horses?” The son of the owner, Felipe, asks them who is personally assisting them for the day. Junhui thinks it must be really _advantageous_ to make so many contacts and have people owing you favours. He should definitely learn some tricks from Mingyu for his own future so that he can also live a comfortable life. 

“No,” Mingyu admits while he gently strokes the mane of a beautiful, black horse with white spots. 

“I can but honestly, even I haven’t ridden one in so long.” Junhui answers while looking at the solid brown-furred beauty in front of him. 

“You have ridden horses before, hyung?” Mingyu asks. Junhui remembers the _summers_ he spent with Wonwoo on Jeju island when they were teenagers, riding the horses and playing around on the sandy beaches. The times were simpler back then, and he can still feel the fresh ocean wind blowing in his face. He has come a _long way_ from those days.

“Yeah, but I’m sure I need a refresher as well,” Junhui says as he walks up to his designated horse. The Criollo horses as the man says are easy to ride, calm and strong. Their gait is sure-footed and most importantly are _familiar_ with the ranch’s mountain terrain. 

After familiarizing himself with the basics and remembering the proper etiquettes, Junhui’s horse canters off over the riding trail. It’s _exhilarating_ to feel the cool winds swipe his face and breathe in the crisp air of the mountains. The clicking sound of horse’s hooves take Junhui momentarily back to simpler times, but he reminds himself that these memories he is making are _different_ and _more special_ because of Mingyu. Although, currently, the other man whines and pouts behind him and begs him to slow down his speed because he is still learning the ropes, and he hates it when Junhui leaves him behind. 

“Hyung! Don’t leave me!” Mingyu yells behind him and Junhui’s unbridled laugh echoes around them. 

The brown mane under his fingertips feels like velvet and Junhui grips the reins tighter as the horse navigates through steeper terrain. Junhui had forgotten how jumpy these rides could be. Mingyu manages to keep up with Junhui through Felipe's help. 

As they finally make it to the top of the peak, Junhui feels the strain of exertion in his muscles. But the scenery in front of him is more than enough to make him bear the pain. He sees mountains descend and then extend to the green plains. There is hardly any sign of human dwellings for as far as he sees. It’s only pure, untainted beauty of _Mother Nature_ that fills his eyes. Felipe leaves them two alone for a few minutes and rides away with his horse. 

Mingyu comes to stand beside him to enjoy the scenery in front of him. He breathes in bergamot and cardamom and a small smile blooms on his face. 

Junhui truly believes that even his dreams must be _jealous_ of the reality he has been living for the past few days. 

All the beautiful, panoramic views feel _infinitesimal_ next to the glow that Mingyu emits. A big and masculine, handsome man who adorns a gentle and tender expression when he looks at Junhui. His gaze is so open and trusting that Junhui feels like _hiding_ him away from the world and then keeping him safe under his watch. 

Junhui hasn’t tried to touch the heavy conversations, but he can see that there are demons that somehow _haunt_ Mingyu. And as a mere human in love, he wants to hold him tight and steal his pain away. 

“I’m scared of heights, hyung,” Mingyu confesses in a small voice. Junhui’s first instinct makes him hold the younger’s hand and give him as much physical comfort as he possibly can. As Mingyu relaxes down, he looks down at Junhui instead of the beautiful landscape. His eyes reflect the _flames_ that Junhui has come to fall in love with. His eyes can burn the shrubs around them and start a wildfire. But Junhui feels comforted by them and a sense of euphoria surrounds his presence. 

“Mingyu-yah?” 

“Yeah, hyung?” Mingyu eyes are transfixed on Junhui’s lips. Some things will remain the _same_ even after yearnings are fulfilled. Junhui thinks that it’s nice to be longed for even after the person already holds his heart. The longing remains _evergreen_ in a person’s heart. 

“Under your gaze, I feel warm.” Junhui closes the distance between them and _kisses_ the man who holds the sun on his lips. The cool winds sway around them, but Junhui relishes in Mingyu’s warmth. 

Felipe eventually comes back to fetch them and after having a fulfilling ride and feeding the horses carrots for their hard work, they are taken back to the lodge for lunch. 

The menu is simply meat. A lot of meat. They get to have the famous Argentine Asado which is less of a simple barbecue and more of a pastime because everyone including the other guests and the family who owns the ranch gathers outside, under a gazebo while few men grill different meat cuts. 

They are served with lots of appetisers while the process of grilling meat takes place. Plates of cold cuts and cheeses, loaves of baguettes and empanadas are kept in front of them. Along with their meal, they are served the famous Malbec wine (the thing that Junhui and Mingyu flew all the way from Buenos Aires but will only get to go to the winery the next day). Both Junhui and Mingyu help themselves with only one glass for formality. 

A man plays gaucho music on guitar. It’s different from the usual music Junhui is used to hearing on guitar. The music is lively and speaks a story to him about grassy fields, farms, horses and the pampas. The charming melody starts slow and turns into something intimate and smooth. It’s relaxing and harmonious.

Junhui takes a glance at Mingyu to gauge how he feels about the music. Mingyu looks at the guitar like he is looking at an oasis in the middle of the desert. Junhui has seen that gaze so many times that he can picture it with his eyes closed. 

Mingyu looks at the guitar the _same way_ he looks at Junhui. 

“Do you want to play?” The man looks at Mingyu and asks. The latter comes out of his reverie and nods his head. He gets up from his seat to walk towards the man who holds the guitar and takes his place. Mingyu settles down with the guitar and tunes it according to his taste. And then, he starts the show and plays the instrument.

Mingyu had told Junhui that he could play the guitar but the man in front of him just isn’t an _amateur_ who likes to play the guitar just for fun. Mingyu is able to strangely emulate the music played by the other man. Not only that, but he is also able to bring an idiosyncratic _character_ to the music that reminds Junhui of happiness, safety and laughter. It reminds him of _home._

Mingyu glances at him and Junhui’s heart starts singing the _song of love._ But the feeling of love is soon replaced by confusion. The expression that Mingyu has is totally _different_ and Junhui has _never_ seen it before. It primarily exudes confidence and dominance but this version of Mingyu seems more profound. Like this persona is _second nature_ to him. 

Junhui’s insides quiver with acquiescence and his _instincts_ tell him to fall down on his knees and surrender himself completely to Mingyu. Which, in retrospect, is _crazy_ because Mingyu has recently awoken a dormant _animal_ inside Junhui who craves control. Junhui realises that he needs to heed Wonwoo’s words and ask Mingyu about his life in the United States. 

“Umm, is it okay if I play some English songs?” Mingyu asks everyone who, just like Junhui, are _mesmerised_ by his music. They all eagerly encourage him to play whatever he wants so that they could enjoy the heavenly music. Mingyu looks at Junhui with his twinkling eyes. 

“This song was played at my parents’ wedding for their first dance,” Mingyu speaks in Korean so that it’s a conversation between the two of them only. “I never really understood the meaning of it until I met you. It’s kind of _poetic_ that the first song I play for you is their song.”

This time Mingyu doesn’t only play the guitar, but he also sings. His tone is low and husky but it sounds smooth and alluring. It reminds Junhui of _satin._ Junhui is no music critic but a person with a voice like Mingyu should be _singing_ as a lead vocalist in a band instead of _managing_ it. 

Junhui barely listens to English songs but somehow he’s heard of the one Mingyu sings. It’s ‘Can’t Take My Eyes Off You’ by Frankie Valli. Junhui listens to the words and his heart starts melting. If Mingyu’s feelings are exactly like the lyrics of the song, then Junhui must accept that the love between them _flows_ like an ocean. It’s _deep_ and _wild._ He feels like his heart is melting and flowing towards Mingyu, trying to seek an end in him. _‘I love you, baby’_ echoes inside his head. _Love._ It’s pure love that he feels for Mingyu. 

Junhui decides there and then that he wants to grab that _blurry future_ that has been floating in his mind and manifest it into a _beautiful reality._ It’s happening and nobody in this world can stop him. Nobody can stop him from telling Mingyu that he loves him and needs him. He belongs to Mingyu and the latter belongs to him. It’s the _absolute truth_ that the universe designed for them. 

Mingyu finishes the song and looks at Junhui expectantly. Everyone is clapping their hands and singing praises to Mingyu but his eyes are fixed on Junhui. It’s like only the two of them exist in this space. The pretty and gentle eyes hold the seas and the skies in them. His gaze feels like only Junhui’s opinion matters to him. 

Junhui smiles. He smiles with all his heart. There is so much _pride_ filled in him for Mingyu, and he shows it via eyes. Mingyu glows brightly like a lamp in return.

Eventually, the main dish arrives and Mingyu abandons the guitar reluctantly to join Junhui and eat. The food is delicious. Their gluttony makes them eat a little too much but it feels worth gaining the extra kilo or two. 

Naturally, sleepiness overwhelms them both after a heavy lunch. Junhui thinks it’s alright to have a nap for an hour or two, but Mingyu throws water over his plans. 

“No, hyung! We rode horses before and you left me behind to bite the dust! Now we are doing something together! This is final!” Mingyu persists as he drags Junhui towards the hills. 

“What are we going to do?”

“Let’s just go for a walk and admire this beautiful place,” Mingyu says with a smile on his face. 

The sun shines brightly above them and kisses Mingyu in the most beautiful way possible. Junhui thinks that the sun god, _Helios_ must be in love with Mingyu and this is the reason why even the former _yields_ his powers to Mingyu. Junhui is just a _simple, powerless man_ in love with Mingyu. 

A fear starts simmering inside the depths of his soul. Mingyu is a perfect man and should really end up with someone who can _match_ his perfection. 

Junhui wonders if he truly _deserves_ the love that Mingyu offers him so readily.

  
  


~•~

  
  


Mingyu sees shades of green and brown surrounding them. The skies are still blue above him and the rays of the sun provide much-needed warmth in the cold weather. Junhui walks around wearing a thick, embroidered white shirt and creamy white pants. The only thing saving him from the cold might be the thick grey coat he wears over it. He has a serene but thoughtful expression on his face and Mingyu thinks he’s the _most beautiful_ person alive.

“Your parents– they must really be crazy about each other if they danced to the song you played earlier,” Junhui comments as they slowly make an uphill climb. 

“Yeah, I guess. They both met each other in university. Two first-generation Koreans immigrating to the United States and trying to get a degree and job. Love came _easily_ to them.” Mingyu recalls the story he’s heard a few times during family gatherings. When he really stops to think about it, he hasn’t met his family in so long and barely talked to them over the phone in the past few months. He’s been running away for so long and now he just wants to _stop._ He’s tired and family is something that will remain with him even when everything else _falls to dust._

“They were crazy about each other. They still are but you know, with the passage of time, the passionate and romantic love _mellows down_ into a feeling of belongingness at most.” Mingyu adds on to his previous words. 

“Hmm, I get what you mean. With time, the love matures as well and the overtly romantic courting becomes a private affair. _Change_ is the only _permanent_ thing.” Junhui says with a thoughtful expression. “There may be times when lovers disagree. I genuinely think for a healthy relationship, little conflicts are a _must_ because if the couple manages to stick with each other after all the resentment and anger has dissipated, that means there is a _strong bond_ between the two that can’t be broken.” 

Mingyu hopes that Junhui is a man who just doesn’t speak wise words but acts upon them as well because if he were to know Mingyu’s real identity, then a _huge conflict_ definitely will rise between the two. But then again they are talking about two people in love. They haven’t explicitly even exchanged those _deep_ and _groundbreaking_ words. 

But deep down, Mingyu knows that a mutual feeling of _undying love_ travels deep inside their subconscious. 

“Can I be honest here for a second?” Junhui stops walking and Mingyu has to turn around to look at him and hear what he has to say. His eyes hold so much _power_ in them that Mingyu feels like he’ll willingly fly to the moon and bring it back for him if that is something that makes Junhui happy. Mingyu gulps and nods. 

“All my life, I’ve seen different kinds of love. In my parents, my friends, even in myself. I thought that love was _three dimensional,_ consisting of passion, intimacy and commitment.” Junhui stops and takes a deep breath. “Please tell me that I’m _not_ the only one who thinks what we have is absolutely _unreal_ and feels like something that _surpasses_ the confinement of time and space.” 

There is earnestness and a bit of desperation in Junhui’s eyes. His expression is open. _Vulnerable._ Mingyu sees innocence reflected on his face, and he wants to hold Junhui in his arms forever and save him from the _cruel world._

“You’re not. I–” Mingyu is truly at a loss for words. He wants to stop playing the long courting game and just tell Junhui that he loves him. It’s a love he knows he doesn’t deserve, but he _wants_ it anyway. _More and more_ of it until he’s painted completely with it. 

“Do you believe in happy endings?” Mingyu is so lost in trying to formulate words that he doesn’t realise for a moment that Junhui has asked him a question. When the words finally hit his brain, a teasing grin forms on his face.

“Why? Are you _looking_ for one here?” Junhui is caught off guard momentarily but after recovering, he mirrors the same grin full of mischief on his own face. Mingyu knows he’s in trouble. The glint in his eyes makes him nervous because Junhui always does something unpredictable after that. If Mingyu is being honest with himself, _he loves it._

Junhui removes his coat and shoes along with the socks and throws it haphazardly on the ground. Mingyu is baffled by his actions. To make things even more confusing, Junhui starts _running away_ from Mingyu.

“Wait! Jun hyung!” Mingyu calls out to him, but Junhui doesn’t stop. 

He laughs without a care in this world. His laughter is Mingyu’s _most adored_ sound in the world. It makes his heart feel lighter and better. He’s running bare feet and Mingyu thinks that he should at least wear his shoes otherwise he may get hurt from the little pebbles that are strewn around. When Junhui doesn’t run back towards him, Mingyu starts jogging towards him. 

It’s like he feels the _magnetic pull,_ and he can’t physically have a wide gap between the two. 

Mingyu and Junhui reach towards a gushing stream. The water burbles as it travels along its bed. The whole atmosphere surrounding them is _relaxing_ and _peaceful._

Junhui finally comes to a stop and drops on the ground. He lies on the grass and looks up at the sky. Mingyu can see that Junhui is squinting uncomfortably because of the sun. So he closes the distance between the two and stands in the way of the sunlight and Junhui. The shade gives him the opportunity to finally open his eyes and Mingyu can only feel overwhelming love flowing for him. 

Junhui raises his hand as if he’s trying to grab Mingyu, so the latter kneels down. Pleasant winds blow around them and it brings the mesmerizing scent of honey, musk and patchouli. Mingyu already feels so good, but he feels monumentally _better_ when Junhui sits upright and cups Mingyu’s face with his warm hands. Mingyu settles his own hand on the elder’s lower back. 

The intensity of his stare drills right into Mingyu’s soul. His breath hitches for the unknown. 

“What I’m about to tell you aren’t just _sweet words_ to melt you, but my _honest feelings_ that I need to convey in as many languages as I can.” 

Mingyu feels the weight of those words. _He knows._ He knows deep inside his heart that _it’s happening._ Junhui leans forward and brings his lips to Mingyu’s ears.

“In the language that we use to communicate, I love you.” Junhui moves towards the other ear and in the meanwhile, leaves a kiss over his forehead.

“In the language of the country you were born in, I love you.” Mingyu’s heart feels like it’s about to tear out his chest and fly off to the end of the rainbows out of _immaculate happiness._ Junhui moves to the other ear but this time leaves a chaste kiss on his nose. 

“In the language of the country I was born in, I love you.” Words don’t just feel like _words_ any more. They feel like beautiful flower petals falling gracefully over his soul. Junhui moves again and leaves a small kiss over the mole on Mingyu’s left cheek. 

“In the language of the country we both met in, I love you.”

_Saranghae._

_I love you._

_Wǒ ài nǐ._

_Te quiero._

Mingyu is overcome with _emotions_ that he can easily place in the world now. He doesn’t even notice but tears bloom around his eyes in the form of love that he wants to give to Junhui. 

The elder looks at him with a face of a man that he has _loved before,_ that he _loves now_ and that he will _love for years and years to come._

He has lived a terrible life but now he understands why he started creating a righteous path in the past few months. It wasn’t only for himself. It was for him and Junhui so that they both can walk on it _together_ comfortably and share the warmth. 

“Junhwi. _I love you._ It’s you. I’m so madly in love with you. I really, really love you. God! I’m in love with you. I love you so much.” Mingyu keeps repeating his words because saying them just a few times doesn’t feel _enough._ Junhui laughs with glee.

“Oh my god! Have I broken a record player inside you? Are you going to keep telling me you love me? I understood the first time, Kim Mingyu. _You love me and I love you.”_ Junhui gives him a big smile. This all feels like a dream. But it feels so good to dream at all. 

“No, but you need to understand! I love you!” Mingyu pushes his finger on Junhui’s chest to emphasise it better. 

“I know!” There are tears in Junhui’s eyes as well but his laughter ensures Mingyu that they are good tears. 

“I love you!” Mingyu repeats it again because now he has the freedom to say it as many times as he wants. The dam has finally opened and no one can hold his waters.

Junhui manages to shut Mingyu up by kissing him breathless and it isn’t like Mingyu is complaining much about it either. All he knows is that the man in his arms is Junhui. _His Junhui. His love. His destiny. His heart._

He loves sharing a single breath with Junhui. His mouth opens to gasp for air, but Junhui acts faster and probes his tongue inside Mingyu’s thirsty mouth. He can taste a lot of things on Junhui’s tongue. The delectable grilled meat, chocolate tart and remnants of red wine. He also tastes honey on Junhui’s lips. _Sweet and moist. Sweet and moist. Sweet and moist._ Mingyu will live all his life craving for _more and more_ of this kiss even when he knows what it feels like. 

Mingyu tightens his hold around Junhui’s waist and the latter shudders. Junhui starts to fall back and Mingyu gets pulled down with him. If only he could pause the time and cherish this _beautiful moment_ forever. The moment where their love became a single entity. 

Mingyu feels like he is drinking the _planets_ and the _moon_ with the kiss and it’s pouring down his throat and spreading deep inside his body. He feels _stars_ shooting out of the tip of his skin in return. 

Junhui breaks the kiss to Mingyu’s great disappointment but the smile he adorns is unforgettable. He wants to capture this moment with his eyes for a change instead of a camera. 

“Yesterday, in the morning, when you told me that I was special, an exception, I think that was the moment when I realised that I’m so deeply in love with you, Mingyu-yah,” Junhui informs him. _Yesterday._ The moment that Mingyu can never forget even if the waves of time try to wash it away from his mind. Junhui looked ethereal under the morning sun. The golden skin shone heavenly and Junhui’s moans delighted Mingyu in ways that can’t be described in words.

“This honestly feels like a _dream._ This isn’t real. We aren’t real. You are a figment of my imagination.” Mingyu says in disbelief.

“You have a very _vivid imagination_ if you think that way.” Junhui taunts Mingyu in a loving way.

“You came into my life like a hurricane and shifted everything. I don’t remember the person I was before coming here.” Mingyu confesses. There have been very few instances where he felt the guilt of his past weigh him down. But other than that, the _purpose_ of his trip has been achieved somewhat. 

He wanted to disappear for a while and run away from a fixed identity. He wanted an escape from the stereotypes. Although in the end, he found love in his hopeless life. A love that has survived for centuries and will carry on even after their deaths.

Junhui caresses Mingyu’s cheeks and the latter feels butterflies flutter over his skin with the elder’s touch. 

“Mingyu, you can't control where you come from, but you can always control where you go next.” Mingyu chuckles softly at the realization that it’s the words he has needed to hear all his life.

“How–how do you _always_ know what to say to me at the exact right time?” Mingyu asks in amazement. Junhui laughs again. Mingyu has come to learn that Junhui usually likes to crack jokes and laugh a lot. He has such a cheerful personality. It’s _infectious._ And Mingyu seems to be having a real hard time brooding around him.

_“Love.”_ Junhui simply comments. A single word holds so much power, Mingyu thinks. It shouldn’t make sense but it’s the only truth that stands strong. 

With the passage of time, Junhui keeps getting more beautiful but as Mingyu peels layers of Junhui, he finds that he isn’t only falling for his looks but also his _heart_ and _mind._ His big, kind heart and his nimble, beautiful mind. He loves to fool around and tease Mingyu with every chance he gets, but sometimes he speaks as someone who is wise beyond his years.

If Junhui is his fated partner, his destiny, his love that is meant to be conspired by all the stars and planets in this galaxy, then Mingyu definitely _hit the jackpot._ Instead of engrossing in the negative aspects of his own life, he should remember the words that Jihoon said in his dream — _to believe in Junhui and their love and also not to give up._

He’s positive about this affair and thinks they’re going to be just fine.

  
  


~•~

  
  


Unfortunately, nobody had told Junhui that the weather in the mountains could be extremely _unpredictable._ His magical moment with Mingyu by the stream was rudely interrupted by grey clouds floating in and taking away the bright sunshine. The slight change in the lighting of the place wasn’t a _big issue_ though. Mingyu lights up the place enough with his existence anyway. It was the fact that it started raining _cats and dogs, and_ they both got drenched in cold weather. 

“Hyung! Do you want to get sick? Run!” Mingyu screams as they both run downhill and Junhui practically gets his body pulled by the younger. They both laugh over the absurdity of their situation but the realization that they are both in this together brings in a _sense of comfort_ that makes them feel giddy. Life is beautiful and it’s shown to a person in so many natural ways. After slipping and falling a few times on the ground and getting mud on their clothes, they make it back to their room in one piece. 

The sun has already set by the time they change into dry clothes and drink some piping hot coffee to regulate their body temperature. Junhui and Mingyu walk outside to find a campfire prepared by the staff. They both sit around the fire and enjoy some appetisers with more warm drinks under the starry sky. The sky looks something out of a fairy tale book. 

It’s beautiful. _Vibrant._ Junhui knows the stars are alive with this _raw energy_ and singing a song for the eyes. It’s funny but if Junhui were to get scientific with this stuff, there is no warmth in the void of space. It’s _freezing_ cold. But as he looks up at the sky while being surrounded by the warmth of the campfire and Mingyu, he feels a humble cosiness springing inside his soul. The stars scattered in the darkness look like sugar splattered over black marble. 

In a sense, he should be grateful to these stars. They planned his meeting with Mingyu all along since his _birth._

Junhui turns to glance at Mingyu only to find the younger man looking at him with a reverent stare. If someone were to ask Junhui’s favourite thing about Mingyu, it’s probably his _dark_ and _gentle_ eyes. It was the first thing that made Junhui crave for more of Mingyu. _More and more and more._

“Stop staring at me,” Junhui says but there is no bite in his tone. 

“I can’t,” Mingyu says with an amused smile. He reaches for Junhui’s hand and interlocks their fingers. Junhui has also come to learn that Mingyu loves to have some sort of constant human contact. Maybe because he wants to feel the warmth. Or maybe he wants to believe that everything around him is _real_ and not some part of a well-orchestrated _dream._ Regardless, even when Junhui isn’t always in favour of holding hands, he can push aside his discomfort of having clammy hands because seeing Mingyu’s happy face is on _top_ of his priorities. 

After the stories of Gauchos finish and the appetisers and drinks disappear, they are invited back inside the lodge to have a hearty dinner. More luscious meat is served. Junhui thinks that Argentinians really love their meat. They are also served home-made desserts that contain the traditional Dulce de Leche. 

After an eventful and tiring day, they both retire for the night and walk back to their room with a bottle of Malbec wine that was gifted to them by the owners. 

Junhui closes the door to their room, and he already has a solid plan of hitting the bed and closing his eyes because he can feel the exhaustion _bleeding_ through his bones. It’s been a bloody long day after all. 

“Why don’t you drink some wine? You’ll feel better, hyung.” Mingyu suggests. Junhui is already lying on the bed, and he feels the gratification of his back finally finding the proper support that it needs. The bed feels like heaven.

“I just want to sleep, Mingyu-yah.” Junhui hears the cork of the wine pop off, and he knows that Mingyu is helping himself with a glass of wine. The younger likes to drink, so he could enjoy it by himself, Junhui concludes. But obviously, Mingyu isn’t a _big fan_ of enjoying things by himself. 

“Wow! This tastes so rich. You should try it while it’s still cold, hyung.” Junhui hums but mostly ignores him, choosing to still have his eyes closed. “It genuinely tastes like you.” 

Junhui opens his eyes because he can’t believe Mingyu just made a ridiculous taste comparison between wine and him. 

“What is that supposed to mean?” Junhui asks with a raised brow. 

“Come here.” 

Junhui grumbles. He wants to argue that he is the older one here and Mingyu shouldn’t really be ordering him around but something about the way Mingyu simply _commands_ in a smooth voice has Junhui’s body moving on its own. 

The images of a different Mingyu from back when he held the guitar has him _quivering_ from the inside. He’s a curious being and it is still hard to digest that Mingyu was able to change his appearance by somehow playing the guitar and singing. And then, just like that, Junhui remembers Mingyu’s singing voice. He wishes he could hear Mingyu singing for the rest of his life. 

Junhui stands beside Mingyu who is busy pouring wine to the glass. Junhui is thankful for his courtesy and tries to take the glass. But Mingyu apparently has other plans. He takes a sip out of the glass and Junhui stands there confused. 

“I thought you made me get up to taste.” Junhui deadpans and then whines in frustration. 

Mingyu removes his lips from around the glass and pulls Junhui in. He tilts Junhui’s face up by holding his chin and having their lips meet gently. Mingyu probes his tongue inside Junhui’s mouth and the latter feels the liquor that has turned _warm_ from Mingyu’s mouth pour down his throat. 

It’s sweet. He drank some wine in the afternoon and even at dinner but this one is just _sweeter_ than the rest of them. Maybe it’s sweeter because it comes from Mingyu’s mouth and Junhui is addicted to the inherent taste of the younger’s mouth. 

Mingyu disconnects their lips, drinks a little more and then goes back to smooching Junhui. Drinking through kissing isn’t the most precise and proper way to drink wine. A lot of the liquid trickles down Junhui’s neck, and he can feel the drops making their own path to his shirt. Mingyu breaks the kiss to lick the spilt drink off Junhui’s neck and the latter raises his head to give him better access. 

Mingyu keeps on repeating the action of having Junhui drink the wine through his mouth and the elder feels the arousal _burning_ deep in his groins. 

“You’re going to stain my shirt if you keep this up.” Junhui manages to speak through the clouds of lust and his heavy breathing. Mingyu puts the glass aside and grabs Junhui’s hips to spin him around and back him up to the bed. As soon as the back of Junhui’s legs hit the edge of the bed, Mingyu pushes him lightly, and he falls down on the soft mattress.

“Good.” Mingyu almost growls as he lifts his shirt and throws it behind him. The _sex god_ is back. Junhui could admire Mingyu’s body for hours. It’s not his fault he likes his men meaty and tender at the same time. He tries to _throw_ away images of chicken forming in his head and focus on Mingyu. 

Mingyu cages Junhui with his own body and strokes Junhui’s sides with his firm hand. The weather is _cold_ outside, but Junhui is _burning_ from Mingyu’s touch. Mingyu’s hands find the collar of Junhui’s shirt, and he rubs at it lightly.

“These stains– they’ll be a permanent reminder that I was with you at this very moment, Junhwi.” Mingyu leans in and kisses and sucks Junhui’s neck. His heart is so _weak_ that just by hearing Mingyu’s sweet words, it starts thumping very loudly inside his chest and makes him a little breathless. 

Junhui wants to get under Mingyu’s skin for a little while because it’s his favourite thing to do in the world. After kissing Mingyu, of course. 

“I love you.”

Mingyu stops licking Junhui’s clavicle and whimpers in return. Junhui repeats his words and Mingyu’s grip around his hips tightens. The grip is bruising, but Junhui doesn’t mind it much. 

“I love you. I love you more and more as time passes by.” Mingyu whispers into Junhui’s skin. His deep voice leaves tremors that travel deep through Junhui’s body. It makes him moan in pleasure and gratification.

Junhui shifts under Mingyu impatiently. It’s hot, and he’s wearing too much. He needs it all _off_ because he just wants to feel the other man’s passion. Mingyu gets the memo and leans back to pull Junhui’s shirt off along with his pants. 

“God I missed you,” Mingyu says as he lays a trail of kisses over Junhui’s torso.

“What do you mean? We’ve been together the whole time.” Junhui says a little breathlessly because Mingyu’s lips create _spells_ that enchant his body. Mingyu moves up and kisses Junhui softly. The effect it has on Junhui is _deep_ and _intense._

“You are really something, hyung. Absolutely stunning.” Mingyu says in between the kisses and then proceeds to kiss every single mole, both prominent and concealed, on Junhui’s face. “It’s crazy how you’re able to make me feel all these different emotions for you at different times. I crave you in every way possible.” 

“Then what emotion are you feeling right now?” Junhui asks while licking his lips. Mingyu’s eyes follow the motion, and he licks his own lips in return. 

“I wanna lose myself to my carnal desires.” 

Junhui thinks he’ll never catch a break if he is supposed to spend the rest of his life with Mingyu. The latter’s stamina is commendable. And Junhui used to pride himself in having undying energy. He’s finally _met his match_ and it feels exhilarating. 

“Then lose yourself in me.” Junhui purrs as he roughly pulls down Mingyu’s pants along with the underwear and encircles his fingers around Mingyu’s cock. A few strokes are all that it takes for it to come alive and hard in his hand.

“Fuck! Remember your promise from this morning?” Mingyu asks while he rocks languidly into Junhui’s hands. 

“Yeah, about that. Baby, I forgot that riding horses made my ass sore. I can’t take your _big, hard cock_ tonight, my love.” Junhui replies airily. Mingyu looks at him with wide eyes as the blush starts creeping up his face. He looks so delicious that Junhui wants to eat him up.

“Your _words._ Hah! It’ll definitely take me a while to get used to it.” Mingyu chuckles lightly. He then grabs Junhui’s wrist and takes the latter’s hand away from his cock. Both of Junhui’s hands are pulled above his head by Mingyu’s one hand while he uses the other hand to tug down Junhui’s clothes from his lower half. 

Mingyu plasters his body against Junhui’s and both their cocks _brush_ together. Junhui moans from feeling the younger’s hard cock touching his own semi. 

“It’s okay. We can have fun without _destroying_ each other’s ass.” Mingyu winks at him and seals their lips in a chain of wet and passionate kisses. He simultaneously strokes Junhui’s dick to full mast and the elder feels like _melting_ under Mingyu’s fire touch. 

Junhui breaks the kiss and spits into his palm to wrap his hand around their dicks. He lets the wetness of his saliva mix with both their precums and rubs their cocks together with a purpose. 

“Fuck! I love you.” Mingyu rasps above him and raises his head in pleasure. Junhui says those words, and they both keep repeating it until those words feel foreign yet familiar. _Love._ The kind that is all-consuming, overpowering and passionate. The kind that people doubt even exists in real life because it feels too good to be true. 

“What do you want?” Mingyu asks. Junhui is tired from all the activities and this is the reason why he feels like he will come. In any other situation, he would’ve been mortified at reaching his peak so soon. But he’s with Mingyu. And if the latter’s own desperate groans indicate anything, it’s that he’s close as well. Junhui genuinely feels like he’s _home_ with Mingyu. It’s kind of comical how quickly Mingyu has become _his everything._

As his orgasm creeps in, his hands start to falter from the shivers of it. Mingyu, thankfully, wraps his hands around their dicks as well and sets a brutal and overwhelming pace. Just exactly what they both need. 

_“You, more and more.”_ Junhui blabbers in pleasure. Mingyu makes it his life mission to ride both the men to their orgasm. Junhui closes his eyes from the _intensity_ of the pleasure and sees the stars behind his eyes as his whole body shakes. They both keep saying each other’s name like it’s the only word they know how to utter. _Junhwi. Mingyu_.

They both come one after the other, their cums splattering over their stomachs. It’s wet and messy but tolerable for the moment because Mingyu buries his head in Junhui’s neck and the latter feels his harsh breaths leaving a tingling sensation on his neck. 

They both hold on to each other for what seems like an eternity. After finally coming back to earth, they both messily clean each other up.

Mingyu engulfs Junhui’s body with his own and the latter feels warm and comfortable. Just as he is about to doze off, Mingyu calls his name.

“Hmm?”

“If I ask you something right now, will you do it?” Mingyu whispers. There is an uncanny _hesitation_ in his voice.

“No sex,” Junhui says the first thing that comes to his mind.

“No, not that.” Mingyu kisses Junhui’s shoulder. “Will you _stay_ with me when this holiday is _over?”_

It’s the most _dreaded_ question that Junhui does not want to answer. Mostly because he has the answer to this question and realistically, he shouldn’t be entertaining this answer. He knows for a fact that Wonwoo won’t be happy with it.

But if he has to move the oceans and mountains apart to be with Mingyu, he’ll do it without any qualms. 

“I promise that we’ll somehow find a way to make this work.” Junhui leans up to leave a kiss on Mingyu’s forehead. It’s dark, but he sees tears glistening on Mingyu’s face. Junhui’s heart _breaks_ into millions of pieces as he realises the younger must be anxious about their future. 

“I love you. You’re all that matters to me here, _at this moment.”_ Junhui tries to assure Mingyu. The latter nods and tightens his hold around Junhui. After a while, Mingyu stops responding and Junhui sighs in relief because the younger man seems to have slept. 

He sleeps soon after and dreams of a _beautiful and hopeful future_ with Mingyu.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> compared to the last chapter, this chapter had more plot lol.  
> thank you for reading! let me know your thoughts because they make me happy! ♥  
> [twitter](https://twitter.com/redsyub) | [curiouscat](https://curiouscat.me/redsyub)


	7. Day 6

As always, it is disorienting when Mingyu opens his eyes after a night of sleep. He blinks them several times and looks towards the window to gauge time by the intensity of colours in the sky, only to be greeted by the sight of a red stag roaring outside the window of their room. He has never seen the animal before and thinks how beautiful it really is up this close. Mingyu is fascinated by the massive antlers on its head. 

He tries to raise his hand to rub the sleep out of his eyes but is reminded of the warm presence using his arm as a pillow and sleeping peacefully instead. Just looking at Junhui brings a sense of comfort in his heart which helps him in ignoring the numbness in his arm. 

Junhui is like a beautiful reminder that he’s still alive and the world isn’t completely black. Specks of dazzling white exist and Junhui resides in one of them. A divine being in the form of  _ soft skin _ and  _ warm blood. _

A cynic turned into a hopeless romantic because of love. Now that has to be the most  _ ironic _ thing that has ever happened to Mingyu. 

Mingyu watches Junhui’s golden skin glow under the grace of the rising sun. It feels like he’s gazing at the most beautiful stars in the night sky as he drinks in the moles splattered on his body with his eyes. Mingyu’s fingers  _ itch _ to touch and map them, feel them and learn them. He glides his fingers on the supple skin and gently caresses the hickeys he left on the beautiful skin. 

Mingyu truly feels like he’s petting a cat because Junhui purrs and twitches in his sleep just like the animal. His eyes move up to the elder’s face, and he finds Junhui’s eyelids are completely shut. Mingyu smirks as he realises that Junhui isn’t really sleeping but pretending to sleep because he is aware that the man does not sleep with his eyes completely closed. He places his hand on the crown of Junhui’s head and leans down to place small kisses over Junhui’s face. 

“Ah, stop it!” Junhui groans in a rough voice and turns his body towards the window to escape Mingyu’s attacks of affection. The latter happily shifts and engulfs Junhui’s body in his arms, burying his face in Junhui’s shoulder and breathing in the remnants of honey, musk and patchouli. 

Junhui’s body abruptly jumps in his arms and Mingyu opens his eyes.

“Oh, wow! It’s big.” Junhui says as he looks at the stag standing outside the window. Mingyu visibly relaxes and settles back into the comfortable state he had found moments earlier.

“I agree.” Junhui’s body wriggles in his arms but even Mingyu knows that the former does not want to run away but is dramatising his discomfort. 

“Let me sleep more.”

“But you weren’t even sleeping,” Mingyu whispers in Junhui’s ears, eliciting a whimper from the elder man.

“You don’t know that!” Junhui weakly protests.

“You sleep with your eyes half-open, hyung.” Mingyu deadpans. Junhui silently sulks as he realises the trivial argument has been lost by him. 

Still, they cuddle and silently bask in each other’s presence. It’s  _ comfortable. Natural. _ A realistic voice in Mingyu’s head says not to get used to this wonderful feeling. This feeling of waking up next to the love of his life. 

Mingyu has never been more sure of any other truth than the one that he has come to accept so readily —  _ Junhui is the love of his life. _ It’s the simplest and the most powerful truth in the world at the moment. 

It’s an amazing feeling to love someone really. It makes Mingyu want to live and seek a future. But more importantly, it makes Mingyu want to  _ love himself _ because there has to be good in him that made Junhui fall in love as well. It makes him realise that he isn’t a monster. He is just a human being who made some pretty bad choices and now is constantly tortured from within by his past. 

But the voice persists on the case that there is no foundation in this relationship. They both are practically living in a  _ bubble, _ away from responsibilities and priorities, completely isolated from reality. Even if they have a bond that feels ancient and connects them, it does not negate the fact that they know practically nothing about each other. 

It’s funny but even when Mingyu knows Junhui as a human, he does not know him as  _ Moon Junhwi. _ And even if Junhui knows him as Kim Mingyu, he knows nothing about  _ Jade, _ the notorious rockstar. 

Their love is mildly built on a lie because hiding the truth is the same as lying. This love  _ owns _ Mingyu completely, but he isn’t even sure if it’ll last forever at this point. 

“Oh, shit!” Junhui exclaims and quickly turns his body to hide his face in Mingyu’s chest. The latter comes out from his dreadful pondering and looks at Junhui to understand what’s happening. He places his hand on Junhui’s waist and lightly rubs it to soothe him before asking what’s wrong.

“I saw its dick.” Junhui simply comments. And that is when Mingyu looks at the red stag again and directs his gaze towards the thing that has got Junhui so flustered.

He knows that they don’t have much time together, and he should probably come clean about his identity, but he also just wants to live in this  _ precious moment _ where only he and Junhui exist. 

“It’s the rutting season for them. Woah, its dick is hard.” Mingyu adds. Junhui leans back and hits him lightly on his chest.

“Don’t  _ stare _ at it!” Junhui chastises him with knitted brows. 

They both stare at each other for a moment and then, they laugh. Laugh like two people without any worries in the world. It’s so easy to lose himself in these lazy moments he shares with Junhui. He tries to settle himself in a way so that every inch of his body touches Junhui’s and revels in the elder man’s warmth. 

He casually leans down and kisses Junhui just because Junhui’s lips are meant to be kissed as often as possible. However, he just places his lips over the other man’s, nothing more. He lets Junhui be his air and breathes him in. Mingyu tastes sleep in Junhui’s mouth but even that tastes  _ right _ to him. He feels complete. 

The elder man, however, starts moving his lips lightly and starts sucking Mingyu’s upper lip, biting in between. Mingyu lets out a wounded growl and tightens his grip over the elder man’s waist. 

The bed creaks beneath them and the blanket almost falls off as Junhui pushes Mingyu to lay on his back and climbs over him to sit on his lap. Mingyu has come to learn in the past few days that Junhui likes to  _ rush _ things. He has this restless energy in him that never seems to die. The need to release this energy is what makes him awkward and act like a child at times but Mingyu knows  _ better _ than to perceive him as a kid. 

So it is quite  _ surprising _ to him that Junhui is kissing him leisurely while moving the pad of his fingers over Mingyu’s skin lightly. Their lips tremble from controlling their desires. Maybe it’s the sleep that makes him feel lazy or maybe Junhui is comfortable in his skin with Mingyu. Either way, Mingyu enjoys the sweet moment and returns the soft kisses.

“Junhwi?”

“Mhmm?” 

“Do you wanna  _ bone?” _ Mingyu asks in English. Junhui leans back and looks at him with a quizzical expression. 

“What do you mean?”

“Sex.” Mingyu supplies. Junhui sighs and climbs off the younger man, getting off the bed in the process. He turns around and looks at Mingyu expectantly like he’s expecting Mingyu to follow him.

“Please don’t use western slang with me. I don’t understand it. But yeah, come on! Let’s have some  _ fun _ in the shower.” Junhui winks and starts strutting towards the bathroom. And just like a whipped man, Mingyu jumps off the bed and follows the elder man eagerly. 

The bathroom has a big mirror over the sink. It’s wide and covers almost the whole wall. Junhui stands over the sink and places his hands on the edge, patiently waiting for Mingyu. The latter sews the distance between them and stands behind Junhui, bending down a bit and placing his chin over Junhui’s shoulder.

They both look at their reflection in the mirror. It’s one thing to know that they both belong to each other because they have a connection that feels surreal. A connection that makes them two halves of a whole. It’s another thing to look at the image of both of them together and understand  _ why _ people like Seokmin think they are perfect for each other. It’s a  _ vision, _ alright.

Mingyu can hear electric sparks crackling around them as he admires the contrast between the skin of honey and golden hues. The contrast between built and lean. The contrast between black and red hair. The similarity between gorgeous and gorgeous. They look good together and match each other well. 

“Mingyu,” Junhui calls out his name. He meets Junhui’s eyes through the mirror and blanks out for a moment. He tries to understand what choices led him to his current situation. This whole week feels like a bunch of  _ pretty illusions _ were laced together to form a  _ beautiful film. _ He can’t believe that only a few days have passed. It feels like a  _ lifetime. _

He runs his fingers over Junhui’s chest and watches the latter gasp silently, his mouth opening and closing like a fish, as his expression changes from neutral to something open and tender. 

“Look at yourself, hyung,” Mingyu says as he tweaks Junhui’s rosy bud in between his fingers and makes the latter squirm in his arms. Junhui pushes his weight back towards Mingyu and the latter grinds his crotch against Junhui’s ass. They both are wearing briefs but Mingyu can feel the softness of Junhui’s asscheeks from memory. 

“You’re hard, Mingyu,” Junhui teases with sharp and hooded eyes.  _ Déjà vu. _ Mingyu chuckles and bends down to leave open mouth kisses over Junhui’s shoulders.

“It’s because I love you and I’ll always want you.” 

“You love me?” Junhui asks in a teasing tone. Mingyu looks up and finds the glint in his eyes. He rubs his chin against Junhui and hears the latter whimper probably from the prickling sensation he gets from Mingyu’s stubble. He couldn’t shave his face the previous day because they needed to rush to catch the plane. 

“I do. Don’t you?”

_ “More and more _ as time passes, Mingyu-yah,” Junhui says and turns his head to kiss Mingyu instead. It’s firm and unrushed. It grounds Mingyu. But the younger man remembers that they don’t have all the time in the world as they have to catch a car that drives them back to the city. They also have to catch a flight in the afternoon that takes them back to Buenos Aires. 

Mingyu slides his hand downwards and slithers his fingers past the waistband of the briefs, inside the thin fabric. It’s warm and mildly hard. Mingyu whips Junhui’s dick out and makes the man moan loudly. Junhui’s eyes are closed and his body is blushing, painted with a pretty pink. Mingyu  _ wants _ him to look.

“Junhwi, look, baby. Look how beautiful you are. Fucking  _ perfect _ for me.” Mingyu whispers in his ears as he lazily strokes Junhui’s dick to full mast, working his way against the dryness. He’s too lazy to get the lube.

“Fuck, it’s embarrassing.” Junhui gasps as Mingyu rubs his thumb over the slit, spreading the precum over the head to make the slide easier.

“What is?” 

“The things you do to me.  _ So easily.” _ Junhui says as he raises his hand and buries his fingers in Mingyu’s hair for support.

“It’s not embarrassing. It’s magnificent. It assures me that  _ you’re mine, _ baby.” Mingyu mumbles over Junhui’s neck. He completely pulls down the briefs which slip down Junhui’s legs and presses the elder man’s body roughly into the marble making him groan as a result. 

Mingyu looks in the mirror again, this time, at his own reflection. If Junhui thinks his appearance is embarrassing, Mingyu’s is even worse. His whole body is flushed as well, his ears completely red. His face looks completely wrecked, his eyes reflecting carnal desire. 

“What about the effect that you have on me?” Mingyu asks as he runs his finger over the supple asscheeks and then pulls them apart for better access. Junhui jumps and quickly removes one of his hands from the edge and reaches for Mingyu’s wrist to stop him.

“No anal stuff. I would like to have my ability to walk properly throughout the day.” Junhui quickly rejects Mingyu’s intentions although the younger man understands. 

Without wasting any more time, Mingyu returns to giving Junhui a handjob. It’s more about watching Junhui  _ lose _ his senses from the pleasure anyway. After all, the greatest pleasure in the world is giving pleasure.

“The effect I have on you is adorable.” Junhui finally answers. 

_ “Adorable?” _ Mingyu squeaks and in retaliation, he squeezes Junhui’s cock in a tight hold making him inhale sharply. Junhui loves challenges and instead of submitting himself, he just smirks and meets Mingyu’s eyes through the mirror.

_ “Cutest!” _ Junhui persists. Mingyu feels a shiver run through his veins because  _ god, _ he’s so in love with the man. Even if Junhui is taunting him, all he really sees is the blinding smile and Mingyu wants to  _ immortalise _ the man by writing the most beautiful phrases and singing them so that the world will remember Junhui as the most breathtaking man on earth for centuries.

Instead of drawing it out, Mingyu loosens his hold around the base of the shaft and starts moving his hand. He is mesmerised by the voices and the expression that Junhui makes, fisting the cock with a quicker pace and memorising the shape and veins of the firm dick. 

He wants to see Junhui revel in pleasure, hopefully, give up all the control he has to Mingyu because he just wants to take care of the elder man. And Junhui  _ does _ that. His head lolls back on Mingyu’s chest as he watches Mingyu’s hand jerk his dick. His chest dips up and down from heavy breathing, and he struggles to keep his eyes open. 

_ Junhui is beautiful. _

“I’m close.” Junhui gasps while uttering those words and Mingyu wants to work his tongue over Junhui’s neck because it’s sensitive and makes the elder let out pretty noises in his silvery voice. But he resists his urges because he really wants to see Junhui come  _ undone _ in the mirror. 

“Watch how pretty you look when you come, hyung.” Mingyu goads in the deepest voice he can muster. Junhui’s muscles tighten as he quivers overwhelmingly before finally collapsing over Mingyu and closing his eyes from the burst of pleasure that he feels. He comes with a high-pitched cry and Mingyu watches strips of the white substance splatter over the sink as he helps Junhui ride his orgasm diligently, not missing a single alteration in Junhui’s body. Junhui looks  _ divine _ after he reaches his climax and Mingyu wishes to  _ imprint _ this vision in the back of his mind. 

As Junhui comes down from his high, Mingyu brings his fingers which are covered by Junhui’s cum to his lips, wrapping his tongue around them and lapping it eagerly. It tastes bitter, nothing different but it’s Junhui so even this tastes the  _ best. _ He makes sure to stare at Junhui as he lewdly licks the mess off his fingers. Instead of calming down, Junhui grows more restless as his eyes darken and something shifts inside him. Mingyu grins smugly. 

Junhui turns around and grabs Mingyu’s hand, pulling him towards the bathtub. They both climb in and Junhui slams Mingyu against the wall. The younger man gasps from the impact.

“Baby, you’re still hard,” Junhui says with mirth swirling in his eyes as he yanks Mingyu’s briefs down and throws it behind him. 

“Wanna do something about it, Junhwi hyung?” Mingyu plays along. Junhui looks at him thoughtfully for a while. And then without any warning, drops to his knees. 

“I’m gonna suck you so good that you’ll  _ go to Hong Kong _ because of it,” Junhui announces. 

Mingyu blanks out for a few seconds because Junhui is on his knees. The very first time Mingyu fantasised about Junhui was in the restaurant where they had parrilla. He imagined Junhui’s mouth filled with his dick and the rose-pink lips glistening because of the spit. His  _ visions _ are about to come to life. It’s definitely driving him crazy. But through the lust haze, he finally clocks what Junhui said and his mind stops working for a second.  _ Hong Kong? _

“What?” Mingyu is utterly at a loss of words. Junhui studies his body movements before the realisation dawns upon him.

“Oh, I forgot! Even when you  _ speak _ the Korean language, you really  _ aren’t _ a Korean.” Mingyu does not understand why but Junhui’s words rub a vulnerable spot inside him. An internal conflict he’s been tormented by all his life resides in that spot. A question he asks himself now and then. 

Where does he belong? Where is his home? Is it back in Seattle where his family lives? Or the apartment he owns in New York? Or maybe his grandparents’ house in Anyang that is all the way back in South Korea? 

He looks down at Junhui who stares back at him with stars in his eyes, waiting for him. Junhui is _ always patiently _ waiting for him. Since the day he met Junhui, he knew that he belonged to Junhui as much as the latter belonged to him. And if he can identify this sense of belongingness so easily in Junhui then in some way, he is also allowed to call Junhui his home. Wherever Junhui lives should automatically be his  _ home. _

“What does it mean, hyung?” Mingyu comes out of his reverie and asks instead. Junhui smiles and winks at him.

“You’ll understand if I show you.” 

And Wen Junhui is the  _ greatest showman _ that ever lived.

He wraps his rose-tinted lips around Mingyu’s leaking tip and curls his tongue around, licking the precum off like its ice pop as he wounds his fingers around the base of Mingyu’s dick. The younger man rests his hand on Junhui’s head and twists his fingers in those red strands. Without any warning, Junhui sinks down and Mingyu watches his dick disappearing inside Junhui’s mouth. It makes him buck his hips into moist warmth as he tightens his grip in Junhui’s hair. 

“Fuck!” Mingyu shivers as he lets his head fall back on the tiled-wall and feels Junhui’s mouth work on his cock. 

“Don’t you think you should turn on the knob of the shower if you wanna blow me in one?” Mingyu asks. Junhui quickly draws back and removes his mouth from Mingyu’s dick all the while stroking it slowly and spreading his saliva all over Mingyu’s aching cock. The latter misses the warmth already.

“No. We save water.” Junhui replies firmly with a bashful smile. And Mingyu has no arguments left if the other man words it like that. After that, Junhui simply swallows Mingyu’s whole length in one take and Mingyu feels the tip of his cock hitting the back of Junhui’s throat. It’s an experience to watch the cheeks of the elder man puff around his cock.  _ God, _ he’s too pretty for his own good with those slicked lips stretched lewdly around his dick, Mingyu thinks.

“Oh, baby! Your mouth,” He gasps as he feels Junhui breath out from his nose. The hot air hits his wet dick as Junhui pulls his mouth to the tip and leaves behind a tingling sensation, swiping every other thought out of his mind that isn’t related to Junhui. And with expert ease, the elder man slinks down again and bobs his head fervently with a practised pace, making sure to keep the suction tight and wet. 

Lost in the pleasure, Mingyu forgets about everything and pushes Junhui’s head further in so that the latter can deepthroat him. Junhui gags and for a few blissful seconds, Mingyu feels the pleasure of the moans and gagging sound sending delightful vibrations to his dick. Until he realises that Junhui is trying to pull his head back which makes him quickly remove his fingers from Junhui’s hair, pulling out his dick from Junhui’s mouth in the process. 

The elder man coughs a little and beats his chest to compose himself. Mingyu feels guilty and tries to come up with an apology.

“I-I’m sorry, hyung. I didn’t me-mean to–” Junhui is quick to shake his head and move back to his original position. He locks his gaze with Mingyu and looks at him with a wicked smirk.

_ “Use me.” _ Junhui croaks.

“What?”

“Use my mouth, Mingyu. Won’t you, darling?” That innocent tone that Junhui uses is absolutely jarring compared to the filth that he pours out his lips. Mingyu wants to say something, anything really but his mind stores a concoction of vices he’s acquired in the past few years and this thing he has with Junhui is the  _ purest _ state of an affair he’s ever experienced. Mingyu wants, he desperately wants to crumble in Junhui’s grace. 

Junhui is a smart man. Instead of waiting for Mingyu to speak words, he takes his flustered state as consent and swallows his dick again, making sure to drown Mingyu in delirium. 

Mingyu pushes Junhui’s head into his crotch till his lips touch the base of his dick, making the elder man deepthroat him as he chases the pleasure by fucking relentlessly into his mouth. The erotic noises spur Mingyu to keep going, and he undulates his hips violently. He raises his head towards the mirror in front of him and watches his reflection. Mingyu's breath hitches as he sees his breathless, wrecked state combined with Junhui’s naked back going down on him. 

_ The vision, the sensations, the noises. _ Everything gets too intense to handle and Mingyu feels his imminent release pooling in his groins. He tugs at Junhui’s hair to pull him off his dick but the elder tightens his hold around Mingyu’s thighs. 

“I’m gonna come,” Mingyu weakly mutters but Junhui isn’t deterred by his words. It doesn’t take long for him to come inside Junhui’s throat as he leans his head back and chokes on his own guttural moans. Junhui pulls off his dick and opens his mouth while sticking his tongue out wantonly. Mingyu watches the thick cum  _ spill _ out of his mouth slowly. Junhui’s face is positively rumpled, his hair a mess of tangles, his pupils blown out and his sinful lips are slick with spit and cum. 

A vision out of Mingyu’s  _ obscene fantasies. _ The  _ devil’s spawn _ should have mercy on Mingyu’s poor soul. 

His knees go lax and his body slides down the tiled-wall until he crouches beside Junhui. He rests his head on the elder man’s shoulder and the latter runs his fingers through his tresses in the most affectionate way possible. 

“You’re a demon.” Mingyu states as he comes down from his climax while heaving heavily. Junhui laughs unabatedly.

“Probably.” 

“I think I saw  _ glimpses _ of Victoria Harbour,” Mingyu says just to play along with Junhui. As he expects, Junhui chuckles and gives him a smile with millions of stars in his eyes. 

Mingyu revels in Junhui’s warmth and listens to his steady heartbeat. It’s  _ relaxing. Satisfying. Sobering. _

“Let’s have that shower now and get ready for the thing we came for.” Junhui slaps his arms encouragingly and stands up. 

“What?” 

“The tour of bodega, my love.” 

_ My love.  _ That pet name sounds like an angel’s hymn coming out of Junhui’s lips. It drips like warm syrup over cold ice cream. 

Mingyu is an atheist. A non-believer. Still, he prays,  _ he prays _ for the sun to never fade away from Junhui’s life. He prays that the other man will always be surrounded by warmth and affection. Even if he doesn’t get the luxury to be present in Junhui’s life, he prays that the flame inside Junhui lasts forever. 

  
  


~•~

  
  


The vineyard is magnificent which stretches on hundreds of acres of land in the Uco Valley which is one of the best places to grow wine in Argentina mostly because it’s at an ideal elevation. Junhui and Mingyu walk in between the plantation with a few kind people from the bodega who escort them through the winemaking process. 

It’s a cloudy day and the air is filled with pleasant moisture that kisses the skin and leaves a lingering longing for the calming cold. It drizzled a bit when they drove from the ranch to the vineyard, but now as they stand outside, the dark clouds have blown away and the sky is covered with just a single layer of light grey clouds. It makes the whole experience of walking in between the plantations of Malbec grape absolutely enthralling and to a certain extent,  _ bearable. _

Martina, one of the guides, offers them Malbec wine from their establishment. The colour of the wine is very inky. It’s the first noticeable thing as Junhui swirls the liquid in the glass to intensify the aroma. It is surprisingly fruity as Junhui takes a small sip. He can almost feel the floral notes coming out in the flavour. 

“What are your preferences?” Martina asks them while she waits for the two men to finish their tasting. 

“I usually prefer Cabernet Sauvignon. I prefer full-bodied and complex tastes.” Mingyu answers.

“Ah! You like dry wine. That’s good.” Martina concludes. She has a corporate smile on her face, a smile Junhui needs to practice in the coming days. She turns towards Junhui and looks at him expectantly. “And you?” She finally asks.

“Oh? I like them a bit sweet like Pinot Noir but I can dabble in a bit of Chardonnay as well.” Junhui replies politely, in a practised speech he has used in too many formal occasions.

“Wow, your taste sounds rich. I like it.” Junhui wants to argue and say it’s not really his taste. He usually drinks whatever he is offered, but then he realises that there is no point in explaining it further to a person he’ll probably never meet again. 

Instead, he gives a tight-lipped smile and hopes he appears grateful enough to have been given the opportunity to walk in the lovely plantation. 

They walk further and pluck the grapes with scissors. Martina peels the grape and tells them that it’s the skin that gives the wine it’s inky colour. Mingyu eats a few pods and sticks his tongue out. It’s purple and Junhui laughs at how ridiculous he looks. But he also looks cute and Junhui readily clicks his picture as the younger makes goofy faces. 

_ Memories. _ These are the memories that’ll stay with him for life. Junhui is a strong man and no matter what the outcome of their romance would be the next day, he’ll always associate these memories as happy ones. Because in these moments with Mingyu, his happiness has only been over the moon. 

“You look like a clown with that purple tongue,” Junhui comments to tease Mingyu.

“Really?” Junhui nods wordlessly.

“I’ll take a bunch back to Buenos Aires.”

“Why?” Junhui asks.

“To test if I can colour your skin purple with my tongue,” Mingyu replies in a suave tone while winking. Junhui is taken aback. It’s a novel experience to be put on a spot by Mingyu. Maybe he’s growing too  _ weak _ for the younger man. Or maybe Mingyu has  _ familiarised _ himself with Junhui’s antics. 

“Buy the wine as well. It’s fruity. I’ll pour it over your dick before sucking you off for a change of taste. Better than rubbery-flavoured condoms.” Junhui replies while giving an innocuous smile. 

Mingyu freezes on his spot and almost drops the remaining pods from his hands. His dark and gentle eyes turn hazy, and he tries to come up with some words but fails. 

It’s easy to rile Mingyu up and Junhui takes pride in it. There is something  _ profound _ about having a big and masculine man like Mingyu dangling from the thread of Junhui’s subjugation. He loves this unfiltered Mingyu, stripped of his expensive clothes and refined hobbies. 

It’s his new  _ favourite thing _ in the world.

The tour doesn’t take too long and after buying appropriate souvenirs, they both get into the car that drives them to the airport. The flight is delayed by 45 minutes because of inclement weather and Junhui and Mingyu sit near their gate, waiting for their call.

Mingyu looks lost in his thoughts and judging by his downcast eyes, Junhui thinks that the thoughts in his head aren’t happy. The veins on his neck and hand are popping. Junhui grows concerned. 

“Are you okay?” Junhui asks by tapping his shoulder lightly. Mingyu jumps at the contact but eases quickly once he sees that it’s Junhui. The latter does not remove his hand, just keeps rubbing them in circles to comfort him.

“I don’t know,” Mingyu says meekly. “I’m overthinking, I guess.” 

“About what?” 

Mingyu takes a deep breath and tries to relax his tense muscles. He turns his head to look at Junhui. His face looks miserable and his eyes seem to sing the  _ sonata of melancholy. _ Junhui’s heart sinks deep inside his chest. 

“This holiday– this holiday that I spent with you, it wasn’t planned to begin with. I’m just wondering about all the  _ ‘what-ifs’ _ that could’ve led to a completely different result and there could be a reality where we would still be strangers.” Mingyu says. It’s a complicated thought, filled with too many variables and uncertainties. But Junhui still understands the  _ gist _ of it. 

“Do you regret falling in love with me?” Junhui asks the first question that comes to his mind. As much as Junhui likes to put out a carefree and confident persona, even he has his insecurities. It’s not that Junhui doubts Mingyu’s love for him for even a second. It’s just that it’ll be  _ easier _ to know that even Mingyu feels sorry about their situation.

Junhui can’t lie and say that he has no regrets about this affair. He isn’t a blind romantic and his principles can’t allow him to ignore the reality for too long. Their love is beautiful, too  _ unreal _ for it to have manifested on this planet. But in the end, they are two different people who reside in two opposite parts of the world. 

No matter what, Junhui  _ will _ board the flight that departs for Seoul tomorrow, and he hopes and prays that Mingyu boards his own flight that  _ will _ take him back to New York. He wants to be with Mingyu,  _ god knows _ how badly he wants it. But he is a responsible adult first, and he has matters of the greatest importance that needs to be addressed in the coming week — the initiation ceremony where he will join his father’s company and serve as Vice President of Strategic Planning. 

“It's not that I regret it, hyung,” Mingyu says as he places his hand over Junhui’s. It’s warm and clammy. It’s grounding and comforting. “I just wish that our circumstances were different.” Mingyu’s voice cracks in the end. 

“I really wish we could live a simpler life. I mean, what if– what if I  _ didn’t _ stop to take your photo? Or–or what if we went our  _ separate _ ways after the picture was taken? Or you know, you  _ didn’t _ invite me to stay at your place. Or–” Junhui doesn’t let him finish. He grabs Mingyu’s hand that is placed over his and brings it near his lips. He places a small kiss over Mingyu’s knuckles and looks at him with honest and vulnerable eyes. 

“Stop extrapolating the  _ what-ifs. _ If you only think about what could’ve happened, then you’ll miss the best part.” Junhui says calmly. But Mingyu still isn’t appeased. He still wears an uneasy expression which breaks Junhui’s heart. 

Junhui wants to console Mingyu, tell him everything is going to be okay, kiss him hard till his lips swell and then kiss him slowly and let the gentleness soothe the ache. His body aches to have every single exposed skin touching Mingyu’s body. He wants to be Mingyu’s haven, wants to extract his worries and fears and bury them under the ground. His desires scream inside his body, like a wolf howling at the moon because he knows he can’t do a lot of those things in public. 

He knows about the troubles plaguing Mingyu’s mind. After all, who will understand those problems better than Junhui, who is the only one sailing in the same boat? They both are the  _ only ones _ who can understand, sympathise and cry for each other. People can hear and try to understand and pretend to know the feeling but only Junhui and Mingyu have endured the ache of loving with a  _ love _ that goes beyond the sand and the stardust. 

Mingyu looks at him with eyes that shine because of unshed tears. He wants to say a million things and in return, Junhui wants to hear them and carve them inside his soul. 

“Remember our conversation in the museum?” Mingyu asks with an empty laugh. Junhui does. He remembers how he fought with himself at the time and tried not to fall in love with Mingyu. Clearly,  _ he failed. _

“Love is a helpless thing — this sentence has a whole other meaning once you experience it,” Mingyu says as he looks out the terminal and watches an airplane parking. “It’s not that my feelings for you are like a plank floating on tempestuous waves. They are grounded and strong like an evergreen tree. But our circumstances, hyung–  _ our circumstances _ are unfair and cruel.” 

Junhui looks at him and thinks about all the random scenarios that could’ve happened if only they would’ve taken a different road on the forks. 

“Mingyu, life is unpredictable. You can imagine something to go the way  _ you think _ it will but there is no guarantee, regardless of how well you prepare for it, that it will turn out as your expectations. The world runs on  _ chaos.” _ Junhui explains it slowly.

“What do you mean?” Mingyu adorns a quizzical expression on his face. 

“Do you know about chaos theory?” Junhui asks. Mingyu shakes his head slowly, his big eyes making him look like a lost puppy.  _ Cute. _

“Simply put, a small change or diversion in the initial circumstance can yield a completely different outcome. The most common principle of such chaos is the  _ butterfly effect _ which, by the way, is always misrepresented in the media.” Junhui expresses his distaste passionately.

“How?” Mingyu asks curiously. 

“Well, you know, they always try to find an explanation for divergence. That everything happens for a reason. But predictability is inherently limited. We live in a dynamic world but the media tries to make everything static.” 

“Uhuh,” Mingyu hums reluctantly, still looking pretty clueless. 

“Okay, take our lives for example. I came to Argentina with a completely different plan of exploring the place alone and hoping to find out more about myself. And you came here to take a break from your oppressive job, right? We both had different plans, and we both imagined different outcomes of this trip. But then, we met each other. And our initial visions didn’t really transform into reality. So you see, there are too many  _ variables _ in this world system. There is no point in lamenting over a could-have linear course of action.” Junhui elucidates the theory. 

Mingyu still holds a dazed look but Junhui doesn’t understand if he’s confused or mesmerised. He hopes for the latter. 

“Wow! I can’t get over how wise you really are. Your brain works in incredible ways, and I am in love with it.” Mingyu speaks in his most steady voice that Junhui has heard in the past hour. It’s a compliment, words he’s heard so many times. It shouldn’t faze him but Junhui’s heart picks up the pace, and he looks down shyly, feeling the heat  _ burning _ over his face from Mingyu’s warm gaze. 

“I’m sorry. I’m just a curious being.” Junhui murmurs, insecurity seeping in his voice.

“No, no! It’s great.” Mingyu quickly cuts Junhui’s apology. “I feel like you know something about everything. There is  _ no way _ I’ll ever get tired of listening to you speak.” Junhui would be lying if he said he isn’t appeased with Mingyu’s devotion. 

Junhui has always been bad with maintaining a relationship and now Mingyu is making him consider the possibilities of a long-distance relationship. Can they really  _ make it work? _

“Yes, well, I get tired of speaking so don’t expect me to be your radio,” Junhui says. Mingyu laughs but doesn’t argue any more. The conversation dies down with the laughter, and they both patiently wait for their call. 

After sitting idle for a few minutes, Mingyu shifts beside Junhui which prompts the latter to look at him. 

“Hyung?”

“Hmm?” 

“Can I tell you something?” 

“Sure.” Mingyu looks at the cloudy sky outside. Junhui looks at his side profile and notices that the veins on his neck aren’t protruding any more. He must have calmed down which makes Junhui feel at ease. 

“Usually, I’m a very bad listener.” Junhui does not understand. He has spent more than five days with Mingyu. The younger has always been extremely (in some ways,  _ ridiculously) _ attentive to him.

“Really? But you’ve been quite an active participant in our conversations.” Junhui comments. Mingyu turns his head to look at him. The dark and gentle eyes take his breath away, and he is bewitched by Mingyu’s beauty. 

“Yeah.” He simply says as his lips pull into a small smile. “Because they are  _ with you.” _

The air smells sickly sweet, probably from the coffee shop nearby. It’s so  _ sweet _ that Junhui’s senses are overwhelmed by it, and he can’t think straight. He feels a teardrop running down his cheek, followed by Mingyu’s fingers gently wiping them away. 

He parts his lips, probably hoping to say he loves Mingyu,  _ over a million times. _ Instead, Mingyu pulls him in his arms and Junhui feels the warm and hard body press against him. He breathes in bergamot and cardamom and whispers his confession. Mingyu’s body shakes as he whispers those words back. 

Junhui prays that the  _ flame _ of their love never extinguishes.

  
  


~•~

  
  


_ It’s a warm December night as Mingyu looks over the cityscape from the rooftop deck of some rich man’s villa whose name he forgot in the Hidden Hills. Los Angeles is never cold which is ironic because the city is filled with the coldest motherfuckers Mingyu has ever encountered in his life.  _

_ The loud music reverberates from inside the house, and he hears people’s voices, enjoying their life to the fullest. Mingyu sits alone on a deckchair, too sober for his own good. _

_ His sobriety makes him feel intense emotions that he usually likes to ignore. But most of all, Mingyu feels empty from the inside. Like a hollow shell. Existing aimlessly. He has aims, he thinks. So he asks himself why those dreams seem terribly synthetic and cold? _

_ All the things that played out in his life are wrong. His self-reflection came very late — four years late, but he is glad that at least it came.  _

_ It all happened with a single phone call that he wanted to end as soon as it began. But her desperate and broken voice shifted something inside Mingyu, and he lingered on and listened. A single phone call from his sister changed everything. Everything. _

_ He looks at the bright and colourful city but only perceives it in black and white. Grey. All seems pointless. Fame, money, success, drugs, parties and sex feels meaningless. Mingyu wants a change. He wants that burning passion he had for music again. He wants a do-over.  _

_ Mingyu hears some voices getting louder and realises people are climbing up to reach the deck. In the next few seconds, he sees his usual entourage, his “buddies” walking towards him with glasses filled with colourful drinks and burning cigarettes and joints in their hands. Mingyu is an alcoholic and a druggie, but he has never smoked anything ever in his life. Smoke affects his vocal cords and a singer is as good as dead if they can’t sing.  _

_ One of them comes up to him and Mingyu watches him move his lips and say something. Mingyu has become so numb that he can’t even hear the man speak. Can’t comprehend his words. It’s all white noise.  _

_ He gets pulled closer by the man as the latter takes a selfie with his phone. Mingyu sees the picture. Sees his own blank face. His ash blue, shoulder-length, wavy hair looks like a mess. His eyes are bloodshot and his face looks dull. His lips are chapped and colourless. What has he done to himself? Who is this man in the picture? Mingyu can’t even recognise himself any more.  _

_ “Yay! Jade, let’s go in and start some trouble!” The man says in a wasted voice, bringing the glass to Mingyu’s face and forcing him to drink the alcohol. Mingyu protests with weak spirits until he gets tired of the fucked up game and hits the man’s hand away from him. The grip on the glass loosens and it crashes down on the ground. The shards scatter everywhere and the drink spills over his jeans. The man’s eyes go wide, and he approaches Mingyu apprehensively.  _

_ “Leave me alone!” Mingyu growls as he tries to walk away from the man. _

_ “But we are friends, Jade,” The man says hesitantly.  _

_ Friends? It might be the most ridiculous thing Mingyu has heard all day. He would rather have honest enemies than these friends who lie to his face every single day. He couldn’t be sensible enough to see it in the past but abstinence from substance helps him paint a clearer picture.  _

_ The rage kicks in his bloodstream. It’s new. The anger used to stay dormant with the high the drugs gave him but now they all are flushed out of his system. And he sees everything crystal clear. People’s masks are finally coming off their faces in his eyes. _

_ “All my friends are dead.” Every single person on the rooftop goes shell shocked. They don’t know what to say or what to do.  _

_ “What do you mean?” Someone asks after a long haul of silence. _

_ “The dead presidents on cash. In the end, it’s just my money that stays with me. You motherfuckers ghost me as soon as your work is done. Get off my dick, assholes!” Mingyu pushes people out of his way as he makes his way downstairs. _

_ He feels sick. He needs somebody. Anybody who’ll actually listen to him and tell him all his faults to his face.  _

_ He needs a change. He wants to go home. _

_ But where is home? _

  
  


“Ground control to Major Mingyu. Can you hear me?” Mingyu hears Junhui’s voice. He comes back to reality and tries to dissipate the pain.

“I’m sorry. Were you saying something?” Mingyu asks as he grabs the glass of water and drinks it to feel better. 

It’s evening and the sun is almost dipping down the horizon. The canvas of the sky is painted in yellow, blue and red like a tequila sunset and Mingyu and Junhui sit at a restaurant in Puerto Madero beside the river and enjoy the scenic beauty while admiring the calm waters and boats. Funnily enough, the restaurant is located beside the hotel that Mingyu was initially supposed to spend his week in. Not that Junhui needs to  _ know _ about it.

“Nope. I was just admiring your face while you were visiting another world.” Junhui says airily. 

“I was just thinking about past stuff.” Mingyu comes clean. He picks up a piece of tostado and takes a huge bite of it. Junhui looks at the river instead. The blue and orange hues blend in perfectly and create a warm atmosphere around them. Junhui’s red hair which has faded a bit looks mahogany because of the dying sun and reminds Mingyu of the mahogany dining table in his parent’s house. It brings the lighter memories of a past that he  _ never _ wants to forget. 

“Hyung?” Mingyu calls out Junhui nervously. He’s decided it’s  _ now or never. _ He wants to hide the truth and not drag Junhui in his mess. But the demons can’t hide inside forever, and they’ll always threaten to expose themselves in the worst of times. Junhui needs to know a  _ major _ part of his existence because he wants to be fair. 

Minghao had messaged him again in the morning asking if he told Junhui the truth. When Mingyu gave him a negative answer, Minghao sent disappointed emojis in return. It also reminded him about how Minghao had been shocked to find some information on Junhui on the internet. In the end, his curiosity got the best of him, and he googled Junhui’s name. 

He didn’t specifically find much on the man himself, but he sure did find that Junhui’s father is a business magnate and chairman of Wen Holdings Limited, a huge conglomerate that has its operations based in South Korea and China. 

Mingyu thought he was a big deal as he was a  _ global rockstar _ and everything but Wen Junhui turned out to be a  _ filthy rich heir. _ Technically, didn’t Junhui  _ also _ lie about his identity by conveniently omitting the part where he was rich? 

But the fact remains that Mingyu knows much more than Junhui is aware of and it’s only fair that he peels away a few of his dark secrets as well. 

“I wanna talk about my past. Expose my demons and make you understand  _ why _ I’m this way.” Mingyu says while looking at his fingers playing with the spoon. 

It’s quiet.  _ Eerily quiet. _ Mingyu feels like he’s standing on a seashore as the free air hits his face, and he tastes salt on his tongue. The shoreline starts receding  _ dramatically, _ exposing the usually submerged area.

“Tell me as much as you can. If it gets overwhelming, it’s okay to just stop.” Junhui says with imploring eyes. 

He takes a deep breath in. “I was a drug addict.”

At the moment, Mingyu is afraid of only one thing. He’s afraid of Junhui  _ hating _ him for his Hollywood past. 

He waits for Junhui to say something. 

“Hard drugs?”

“Yes.”

“Are you clean now?”

“Yes.”

“How long?”

“I checked into rehab in January. I haven’t been a fiend since then.” Mingyu says. His throat feels parched. Like a barren desert. He drinks water to wet his throat. 

Mingyu sees high waves approaching him. 

“What made you stop?” Junhui asks. 

Her voice echoes in his head. Her cries. Her smile. Her twinkling eyes. 

“My sister.” 

  
  


_ On the last day of November, Mingyu lies in a hotel room, staying high up in the clouds of euphoria. The evidence of Mingyu’s happiness lies on the coffee table — a rolled-up ten-dollar bill, an Amex platinum card, an empty small, plastic ziplock bag and remnants of white powder on the glass.  _

_ His phone rings and Mingyu picks it up without looking at the screen. He thinks it might be one of his friends with whom he’s meant to hit a party later in the night.  _

_ “Yes?” _

_ “Oppa?” _

_ Mingyu immediately sits up and tries to assign a face to the voice he just heard. It’s familiar. It’s family. _

_ “Huh?” _

_ “Oppa, it’s me, your sister.”  _

_ “Minseo?”  _

_ “Yeah,” Minseo confirms.  _

_ “I’m a little busy right now, Minseo. I can’t–” _

_ “No, please! I’m sorry for calling but please don’t hang up. I know you’re busy but please, it’s only for a few minutes.” Minseo pleads. Her voice breaks Mingyu’s heart. He feels the effects of the drugs wearing off as Minseo’s broken voice sobers him up.  _

_ “I just miss you.” Minseo whines. For a moment, Mingyu finds it adorable. He can vividly imagine her face as she pouts for his attention.  _

_ “I miss you, too, little sister.” Mingyu finally relents. It’s his sister after all. “Where are you?” _

_ “I flew back to Dallas today. We all missed you on Thanksgiving at home.” Minseo says. Mingyu snorts. _

_ “Since when have we celebrated Thanksgiving that I need to come home for it?” Mingyu asks in a sarcastic tone. _

_ “We don’t. But we all get a holiday for it. It’s not like you come home for Chuseok. You always have the same excuse for not coming home.” Minseo complains. Mingyu sighs. _

_ “Yeah, well. I am always busy. How’s uni?” Mingyu asks instead to divert her attention. Minseo moved to Texas back in August for university. Mingyu has not visited her yet, even when he’s been to Houston in the past month. _

_ “It’s good. I joined the theatre club.”  _

_ “Oh? That’s cool.” Mingyu replies. The conversation dies down and Mingyu thinks of hanging up the phone. Minseo beats him to his actions. _

_ “I do have a reason why I called.” She says, a little firmly. _

_ “What is it?”  _

_ “I have a dream.” Mingyu’s interests are suddenly piqued. He likes it when Minseo shares her dreams and worries with him. It makes him feel a little worthwhile. Like a true elder brother.  _

_ “You know, I’m 18 years old right now and in college, everyone keeps asking you about your five-year and ten-year plans. You know, ‘Where do you see yourself in these many years?’”  _

_ Mingyu doesn’t know. He never went to college. Nobody asks him where he sees himself in one year. Nobody cares. All they care about is how much profit you make in the current time. He has to fight and compete with others to stay relevant in the music industry.  _

_ “I thought hard about it. And I finally had these visions.” Minseo continues. _

_ “What visions?” _

_ “In ten years, I’ll be 28 years old. I’d want to be married at that age. A house in the suburbs, two kids in a swimming pool, a job which provides great benefits and security–” _

_ “You’re ambitious, Minseo. That’s good.” Mingyu interrupts her. He thinks it’s cute that she has these domestic dreams. Mingyu hasn’t even found someone who’d make him ponder such things. He’s surrounded by people who give him fake love.  _

_ “Yeah. I dream, I dream about having this Sunday brunch where I’m surrounded by all my loved ones.” Mingyu hears her sniffing. Her voice has started to break. He gets up from the bed and walks towards the window. To say that Mingyu is worried would be an understatement. There is an underlying fear in Minseo’s words and Mingyu needs to figure it out.  _

_ “I see you in those dreams as well, oppa. I see you playing with my kids. You look–look healthy and–and you laugh loudly, make a mess by being your clumsy self but you’re there, oppa. You’re there.” Mingyu suddenly realises what Minseo is trying to allude to. The phone burns his ears and hands. He wants to throw up.  _

_ Ignoring and avoiding his family does not mean they aren’t aware of his lifestyle. They live in an era of information technology. Even if he doesn’t say a word to them, they know. They’ll always know. And they will always pray for him. No matter who comes and goes in his life, his family will always stand by him. It’s the blood bonds. It’s indestructible.  _

_ All of a sudden, Mingyu is scared to die. _

_ “Please, oppa. Stop it. I live with this constant fear, this fear of waking up one day to news of your death. I can’t– eomma and appa can’t– we can’t live like this. Please, if not for yourself, if not for anyone else, do it for me, oppa. Stop drug abuse.” Minseo practically begs, crying loudly into the phone. The ceiling crumbles down, the walls collapse in and the floor opens up to a black void.  _

_ Mingyu starts crying as well. It hurts. Everything hurts. He feels so empty and so alone. Disgusted by his own fucked up existence. He apologises constantly, begs for forgiveness.  _

_ He makes a promise.  _

_ The next day, he flushes all the powder and the pills down the toilet and calls Minghao. _

_ “I need help. Please, save me, Hao.” _

  
  


“I’m living this life of mine today because of her. She showed me the light. She reminded me that my actions have consequences that affect everyone around me.” Mingyu finishes his story.

The tsunami waves engulf him, and he’s pulled in by the strong forces. He is sinking deeper into the dark abyss of the water, drowning. He does not put up a fight. 

“How did you get into it in the first place?” Junhui asks in a careful tone. Like he’s  _ scared _ of hurting him. Mingyu goes for the half-truth.

“I work in Hollywood. The temptation is always a persistent presence. They say it helps with the nerves, increases productivity. They easily forget to mention that it also ruins your life.” Mingyu says with a vicious smirk, regretting all the choices he made. 

“Mingyu?” 

The water fills his lungs.

“Hmm?”

Junhui gets up from his chair and rounds up the table to stand beside Mingyu. There is a bit of hesitance mixed with awkwardness before Junhui relaxes and runs his fingers through Mingyu’s scalp. The pressure is light and the movement is gentle. The fingers find their way to Mingyu’s face and Junhui wipes the tears away. Mingyu didn’t even realise that there were tears rolling down his face. 

“Let it all out. There is no need to pretend that you’re strong.” Junhui pulls Mingyu’s face close and the latter’s face gets buried in Junhui’s stomach. It’s a  _ soft _ and  _ warm _ place.

He sees Junhui approaching him underwater. His appearance looks washed, hues of grey and blue. He reaches out for him.

“If you’re suffering then let people in. Let  _ me _ in. It can be a scary thought but I’ll hear you and fight the demons with you.  _ I’m here.” _ Junhui presses Mingyu further into him. At the moment, all Mingyu wants is to melt into Junhui and love him with warm blood and cold. “I’m here inside your heart,  _ always.” _

Junhui pulls him out of the water, and he finally breathes in the clean air. No more suffering, no more smothering. He’s free.  _ Free. _

“It’s all in the past. Your past shapes you into who you are today but you  _ don’t _ have to be its prisoner. We all do shit things in our life. That’s human nature. Don’t hold on to it if it kills you from the inside and makes you feel hollow.” Junhui’s voice comes from above. It feels like  _ God _ is speaking from heaven. 

“Your life should not revolve around getting over the shitty events of the past. Instead, let those scars be a reminder that you  _ survived _ the deepest wounds. It killed you but you’re still here today breathing fine.” Junhui kneels down so that he’s on the same eye level as Mingyu and pats his cheeks. Mingyu looks at him through tears in his eyes. Even his hazy appearance glows like a blacksmith’s forge. 

“Let’s build a happier future  _ together, _ Mingyu.” 

“You  _ still _ want to be with me?” Mingyu asks. It’s kind of hard to believe that Junhui is still here in front of him. Why hasn’t he run away yet?

Junhui takes a deep breath and pinches his cheeks. It hurts but Mingyu finds the pain grounding. Like a kiss.

“When I said I love you, it wasn’t just for the moment. I mean it when I say I love you and will love you for as long as I breathe on this planet. I made a promise to you last night, didn’t I?” He asks rhetorically. 

Mingyu smiles back. It’s easy.  _ Painless. Undemanding. Deep-seated. _

It’s amazing how all his fears dissipate away in a few minutes. 

Mingyu has always felt a lot, felt vividly. He is just an individual with too many feelings. But usually, the feelings in his soul were mostly cynical, dreary and crass. He was living in the grey. Loving Junhui has coloured his world. 

Loving Junhui has coloured his  _ heart. _

“Where do you want to go next?” Mingyu asks after they both have settled back down. Junhui looks towards the river, possibly to think of a response. Mingyu feels like he isn’t thinking at all. His answer is already on the tip of his tongue, and he is just pretending for dramatics.

“Let’s just go back to the house. I think I’ve seen enough. I won’t be missing this place anyway when I go back home.” Junhui says while gathering his things from the table.

“You won’t miss this holiday?” Mingyu asks, a little amused. Mingyu will probably make a  _ shrine _ of this holiday using all the photos he clicked. 

Junhui looks at him with a serene smile. 

“No. I’ll only  _ miss you,” _ Junhui replies easily. 

Everything is too good. It’s all quiet and nice. Mingyu has a very hard time believing that all of it is real life and not some messed up, intricately woven  _ dream _ of his. It’s truly unbelievable.

He vows to himself that he’ll tell Junhui about his real identity tomorrow. The man has already accepted a huge chunk of his dark past. But he does not want to  _ overwhelm _ him all at once. And he has a strong  _ gut feeling _ that Junhui will accept him for who he is. He hasn’t been this optimistic since his high school days. 

The atmosphere that surrounds them is tranquil. A persistent voice in his head screams that maybe the silence is just a  _ prelude _ to an upcoming storm. 

Mingyu chooses to take Junhui’s advice and ignore the voice. He’s done looking at the world with black tinted glasses.

  
  


~•~

  
  


It’s been a while since Junhui has felt so calm and collected in his head. Usually, he’s the one who has all his thoughts and actions scattered around. It is the major reason why he’s  _ sheltered _ so much back home. Everyone thinks he can’t survive on his own because of his reckless behaviour.

But there is something about Mingyu that brings out his dormant responsible side. He wants to take care of him. It’s really that simple. And after knowing about Mingyu’s dark past, the feelings have multiplied tenfold. The love in his heart  _ blooms _ slowly like a flower in the morning.

Junhui’s love for Mingyu has ascended to a whole different level. It’s  _ torturous _ to imagine a life without him. Junhui will go to any extreme and come up with preposterous schemes to have Mingyu in his life. 

He would  _ believe _ anything Mingyu says to him. He would  _ do _ anything Mingyu wants from him, there will never be any need to plead.

Junhui sits at the piano stool as he ponders his relationship with Mingyu while the latter cleans up in the kitchen. They ate instant noodles for dinner. They had bought three packets from a kiosk on their way back as Mingyu proclaimed himself as the  _ best ramyun maker _ ever. 

Junhui plays ‘Gymnopédie No. 1’ to set a relaxing ambience around them. It declutters his thoughts and calms his nerves. His fingers move deftly over the keys, making the shrill notes echo in the quiet of the night. 

Junhui remembers the messages he got in the afternoon from Seungkwan. He was so engrossed in pacifying Mingyu’s mood that he forgot to reply to him.

  
  


**Seungkwannie 🧡**

** Seungkwannie 🧡[14:48]: **

Moon Junhwi!

I miss you so much

I might be going a bit crazy without you here

Wonwoo hyung is no fun without you

Chan also misses you

Come back fast!

Also

Rule of thumb when you go on a holiday is to send pictures to your friends! 

I’ll be waiting patiently Junhwi hyung 🥰

  
  


Junhui browses through his camera roll and sends about two dozen pictures to Seungkwan. Because Junhui likes to cause trouble on purpose, he even sends a couple of shots he took of Mingyu. He thinks hard about how he should introduce Mingyu to Seungkwan. 

_ Lover?  _

_ Boyfriend?  _

_ Soulmate?  _

_ One true partner? _

In the end, he thinks it’s better not to overwhelm Seungkwan with the taxing aspects of his relationship and just stick to ‘boyfriend’.

  
  


**Seungkwannie 🧡**

** Me[23:07]: **

Okay I got it. Stop acting

I miss you too brat

Just so you know 

The guy in the pictures?

He’s my new boyfriend 😋

He’s very handsome, right?

  
  


He locks his phone and puts it away. Seungkwan won’t open his eyes before noon anyway.

Mingyu joins him on the stool and sits with his back to the piano as Junhui continues playing. He smiles to himself as he remembers the last time they sat this way.  _ Their first kiss. _ At that time, breathing didn’t feel as important as kissing Mingyu. Not that those thoughts have changed. But that first time was  _ everything. _ It set everything into motion. Their holiday, their actions, their love. 

“So? We part ways tomorrow.” Mingyu says with an unshakable voice. Junhui’s hands freeze over the keys. 

“It’s the only adult thing to do.” Junhui resigns with a sigh. 

“I don’t want to be an adult.” Mingyu sulks like a child whose candy was taken away from him. Junhui’s instinct tells him to reach out and console the younger man. But a thought comes in his head. He thinks that if Mingyu can reveal serious stuff about his life then he should come clean about his origins. Make him understand the spotlight that he’s under. 

“I have to go back, Mingyu. I don’t think my conscience will allow me to forget about my life for yours.” Mingyu shrinks away from Junhui and it feels like he’s digging his own grave at this point. But who has said that  _ farewells _ were meant to be smooth sailing? Besides, why does Mingyu think that this is the end? Junhui wraps his hands around Mingyu’s nape and pulls him closer.

“Mingyu, this is our story. It’s fucked up and messy. It has several flaws in its design. But it is  _ our _ story. About just  _ us two. _ I have no idea how this story will end but you can be quite sure that it isn’t ending anytime soon.” Mingyu looks at him with eyes that hold so much tenderness in them. His gaze wavers from his eyes to his lips to his eyes again. 

“I need to tell you something as well,” Junhui whispers because of the fragility of the moment. Mingyu nods for him to continue.

“I come from a rich family.” Junhui starts. There is absolutely no shift in Mingyu’s expression. It baffles him. Was Mingyu already  _ expecting _ this?

_ “Chaebol _ rich,” Junhui emphasises again to make Mingyu understand the significance. It’s like something shifts inside Mingyu as he dramatically widens his eyes. 

“When you said this holiday was something you wanted for yourself before you started your job, you meant taking over a  _ business?” _ Mingyu asks as his eyebrows disappear behind his fringes.

“I’m not taking over just yet. It’s not as easy as the media paints it out to be. I need to prove myself before the board elects me as the chairperson. I need to show that I’m not some spoilt son. And this is the reason why I need to be in Seoul next week.” Junhui explains. 

Junhui has studied and worked so hard for all these years, and he is not going to throw his hard work for romantic endeavours. In fact, he is going to work even harder so that he can create a better and easier future for him and Mingyu. 

“You’re a smart man, Junhwi. I’m sure you’ll take over the business someday.” Mingyu says with a proud smile on his face. 

“You’re right. We need to be aware of our reality.” Mingyu says as he pulls himself away from Junhui and starts walking away. “It’s just–  _ I love you. _ I really do and I’d give up everything to be with you.”

“Mingyu, you can’t–”

“No, let me finish.” Mingyu pleads. “Love isn’t practical. And it hurts like hell to be in love with the most practical man on this planet.”

Junhui walks over to him and wraps his arms around Mingyu’s back while burying his face in the younger man’s shoulder blades. He cherishes the warmth that radiates off Mingyu.

“I know that you won’t leave your life and the worst part is, I also know that you won’t let me leave mine.”

“Mingyu–”

“It’s okay.” Mingyu turns around and wounds his arms around Junhui’s waist. The touch sears through the shirt and Junhui automatically pulls him closer in an embrace. “Love can't be  _ possessed. _ It needs to melt and  _ flow freely _ between two people like a river.”

“I’ll wait for you. As long as it takes. If love finds us worthy then it’ll work for us. Until then, I’ll  _ pray _ for you every night and  _ sing _ your praises.” Mingyu’s words flow inside Junhui’s ears like a symphony. The beautiful words are stained by Junhui’s love. 

_ Mingyu occupies everything. _

“You’re such a cheesy romantic,” Junhui mumbles into Mingyu’s shoulder in a teasing tone to possibly lighten the situation. 

“Your love made me this way.” Mingyu tosses back.

“Shut up!” 

Laughter fills the house as they make their way to the bed. 

They talk about happy things and philosophical tales while their love weeps silently in the shadows. It weeps for an abstract tomorrow that holds perpetual possibilities. 

Their  _ memories _ of this holiday fill itself in a bottle filled with pixie dust and drift freely with the ocean currents while their  _ future _ sails over a tattered plank in the midst of a terrible storm.

They both promise to make it work and meet each other when things settle down for Junhui and Mingyu finds free time. They kiss passionately.  _ Slowly. _ Oaths continuously sweep between them until exhaustion takes over their mind and body. 

“I love you.”

_ Shiver. Tears. Kiss. _

“I love you.”

They let sleep settle their trembling hearts. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you everyone for reading this fic and supporting me! i found a [theme song](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pnyGx_Ixsco&ab_channel=Emanuel) for this story if you're into that
> 
> [gymnopédie no.1](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S-Xm7s9eGxU&ab_channel=DistantMirrors)
> 
> let me know your thoughts because they make me happy! ♥  
> [twitter](https://twitter.com/redsyub) | [curiouscat](https://curiouscat.me/redsyub)


	8. Day 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning: remember the angst tag? well, the magical holiday finally comes to an end.
> 
> p.s. the ages in this fic are not korean to avoid any kind of confusion.

_Cold._

It’s the first thing Mingyu registers as he slowly wakes up from his peaceful slumber. He tries to shift towards Junhui to steal his warmth but the bed remains cold. _Empty._ The cognizance of emptiness is all it takes for Mingyu’s heartbeat to race, and he sits up with wide eyes, panic evident on his face. 

He finds Junhui sitting on the chair near the window, looking at him with a blank expression. His eyes are clouded with emotions Mingyu can’t identify. Although he can guess that it’s probably to do with their imminent separation that’s bound to happen later in the day. His heart already feels heavy, and he’s not even woken up properly.

“Hyung! You scared me.” Mingyu exhales a breath of relief as he shifts his body and leans on the headboard. Junhui returns a small, tight-lipped smile.

“Sorry.”

“It’s okay. Why don’t you come back to bed and stay with me for a little while?” Mingyu drawls and extends his hands in a flirtatious manner. Junhui remains stoic and lets out a deep sigh.

“I think you should finally wake up instead, Jade,” Junhui suggests in a cold voice. 

Mingyu takes a long second to absorb Junhui’s words. 

_Jade._

The _bubble_ which grew bigger and bigger finally lost its tenacity and burst.

“You– you know?” Mingyu tries to form more words, but they all turn to sand on his tongue. He sits up and prays that all of it is just a big nightmare. Junhui snickers in return as he rolls his eyes. His eyes look dull and closed off. Mingyu feels a familiar emotion creeping up his chest.

“I just wanna ask why? _Why_ did you flagrantly lie to me all this time, Kim Mingyu?” Junhui asks instead. His voice sounds hoarse and tight, the usual chirpiness missing. His eyes seem too dull and closed off. It feels like Junhui, who always had his doors opened for Mingyu, has finally decided to shut them tight.

Nothing feels _right._ It’s all _wrong._

“Hyung–” Mingyu tries to speak while reaching out for Junhui’s warmth by extending his hand. Junhui’s face remains blank, and he doesn’t even move to minimise the gap that feels as big as an _ocean_ between them. 

“Was this all a game for you? Found me attractive and thought — _oh,_ I’ll add another pretty boy to the list of people I have ruined?” The words that come out of Junhui’s lips are harsh and cruel. But what irks Mingyu is that the elder is not insulting him. In a twisted way, he’s demeaning his _own worth_ in Mingyu’s eyes and it breaks the younger. 

“That’s not true!” Mingyu yells back and then slaps his hand over his mouth from losing his composure. However, he can’t stay calm when the _love of his life_ seems to be slipping away from his fingers. 

And then, he watches a tear bloom in the corner of Junhui’s eyes. All the shackles that had him stuck to the bed break down as hell breaks loose. Mingyu pulls his body off the bed and trudges his way towards the other haphazardly. Junhui quickly gauges his intentions and runs away.

“Hyung, please!” Mingyu begs as he chases after him to the living room.

“Please, what? Huh?” Junhui yells, his sharp voice feels like a glass finally shattering into millions of pieces. For the first time ever, Mingyu sees _hate_ reflected in Junhui’s eyes. 

Junhui hates him. He lambastes himself because his greed for Junhui’s untainted love made this happen. In the end, he was _too damn selfish._

“Please, just listen to me,” Mingyu says while choking on his own voice. He feels wetness around his eyes. Tears morph into blood, _red and painful._

“Listen to you spew more lies to my face? Fuck you!” The anguish and betrayal leave Junhui breathing fire. His teeth clatter from reining in his anger and the body shakes violently. The morning sun streams in from the windows and Mingyu hates that all of this is not a nightmare. His _dreamlike reality_ is turning into a _horror show._

Junhui is a gentle and kind man. His anger makes fear crawl up Mingyu’s neck and strangles him till he’s gasping for breath.

“Please, hyung! I know I wasn’t honest about my identity but the man that was with you this whole week was the _real me.”_ He knows he’s sputtering words, but he’s not sure if they are reaching Junhui. The fear of the unknown starts to submerge his whole being. “I just love you so much.” The confession comes out weak. He’s not sure if Junhui wants to hear those words right now.

“Real you? What the hell is that supposed to mean? The real you is fucking bad news, Mingyu! I’m still trying to digest the things you’ve done.” Junhui unceremoniously falls on the sofa and sighs. He raises his chin and looks at the ceiling with desolate eyes. The sunlight hits on his tear-stained cheeks and makes it shimmer. Mingyu will _always_ find him beautiful.

He walks to the sofa and takes his place on the other end even when his body screams to cut the distance between them. Ignoring his instincts might be the best course of action for now. Junhui takes a deep breath and wipes the tears off his face roughly. 

“You say you love me but you kept me in the dark about something so significant, Mingyu. When I heard you play guitar and sing, I thought a person with your calibre of talents should be a musician. And I was going to encourage you to pursue a career like that because I thought you weren’t happy with your job. Oh, now I feel like a fucking idiot.” Junhui says softly. 

“I never meant to hide it forever, you know?” Mingyu confesses weakly. It’s a bit comical that the day hasn’t even _started_ for them and his life seems to be on the brink of its _end._ “I just– hyung, I didn’t come to this country to meet someone new or anything like that. I had a plan to just run away from people who had painted me as a villain. I had forgotten who I really was and wanted to find myself again.” Mingyu gingerly tries to find Junhui’s fingers. The latter flinches at first but lets Mingyu intertwine them. The _warmth_ gives him strength.

“It’s just like you said yesterday. Things don’t always go the way we plan them. We met and I was _instantly_ smitten by you. I had this sudden urge to be with you and know you. I would’ve ignored my feelings and tried to go my separate way but then I realised you had _no clue_ who I was. And it felt like the whole universe had somehow _blessed_ me with this chance to savour my newfound anonymity with you. After just a few hours of hanging with you, my feelings for you were too deep and I just wanted you to _like me_ for me, _not hate me_ for my past sins.” Mingyu finishes while stroking his thumb on other’s soft hand. Junhui retracts his hands and looks at Mingyu with furious eyes.

“Fine, I understand the need to hide your identity in the beginning but Mingyu we’ve been together for _six days!_ Didn’t you ever think that maybe you should reveal your origins after, I don’t know, we kissed or fucked or flew hundreds of kilometres to Mendoza or professed our undying love for each other? Huh? Were you _ever_ going to tell me who you were or not?” Junhui loses his calm again and his voice echoes loudly in the room.

_“Today!_ I was going to tell you everything today! I wanted you to hear it from me. How did you find out anyway?” Mingyu asks, his volume matching Junhui’s. 

“It doesn’t matter.” Junhui resigns. “Nothing matters.”

“Why are you saying that? It all matters to me. _You matter to me.”_ Mingyu says. He can already hear the words that have been ringing in the back of his mind. Minghao’s warning — _to be honest with Junhui before things burn down to the ground._

Junhui sits still with a blank expression on his face. It seems like the vacuity of his mind can’t be filled with talk of any sort. 

“Mingyu? I think you should pack your bags and leave.” Junhui says as he gets up and starts walking towards the bedroom, his face showing no emotion. “As soon as possible.” 

Mingyu’s worst fears finally _manifest_ in front of him. Their paths had somehow twisted together and formed into a single road made of gold. A fork finally comes at the end of this road and it's made of soot and weeds. _Desolate. Dark. Disconsolate._ He does not want to walk on this road. His life may have not begun with Junhui, but he wants it to end with him by his side. He wants his life to find an end at Junhui’s feet.

This can’t be the end. Mingyu needs to explain everything and clarify all the misunderstandings in Junhui’s head.

“Are you ending this?” He asks weakly, words barely leaving his lips. “What about love? What about the _promise_ you made?”

His heart feels like a bird with broken wings. It flaps its wings desperately, trying to reach out to Junhui, to his heart, his moon, his universe, his life. But it's all in vain and only brings in more pain. He’s drowning in the sorrow that his inevitable separation brings in.

“I made a promise to _my Mingyu._ I guess I love him more than I should have. In the end, you are not my Mingyu. You are Jade, this worldwide sensational rockstar and a man who is way out of my league.” Junhui replies while he sits on the edge of the bed, playing with his own fingers timidly. Mingyu comes to kneel in front of him and holds his hands again. He wants to hold those warm hands _forever._

“I am yours as much as you are mine.” He leans in to place a soft kiss on the other’s hands. “Yes, I was a dope fiend and it made me commit sins after sins. It controlled me and I couldn't stop myself. But the conversation we had yesterday was real. I stopped because of my sister. I got issues and I’m trying to solve them all one by one. The man that was with you this past week is _me,_ Junhwi. I haven’t opened myself to anyone before the way I did with you. You are my first and last, my one and only, true love.” Mingyu says the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth.

“You loved me at my best then why can’t you take me at my worst?” It’s a hard question and Junhui doesn’t deserve it. But Mingyu sees his life slipping away. He’s hurting. He wants the other to _feel_ how much he hurts. Junhui needs to feel the fear creeping inside Mingyu’s bones. 

“You have a child.” Mingyu hears the words and the anguish momentarily pauses as he tries to comprehend the words. _Child? What child?_ His grip loosens over Junhui’s hands as he remembers all the rumours attached to his name. 

_Oh._ There was a woman who blatantly claimed that Mingyu was the father of her child. It was hot gossip news that Mingyu avoided as he was still going through rehabilitation. But now as pieces come back to him, the sick realisation hits him — Junhui probably believes every single dogma spread by his detractors. 

Junhui believes _them_ over Mingyu.

A new kind of anger awakens inside Mingyu. 

“How can you believe their words over mine?” Mingyu yells as his hold over Junhui’s hands tighten again. His grip will probably leave behind marks but his brain isn’t in the best of the condition to notice it. “That woman is a fucking liar! An attention seeker! A profiteer.” Junhui shoves Mingyu back and plods over towards Mingyu’s belongings. He starts to pack on Mingyu’s behalf wordlessly.

Mingyu looks in absolute horror and pulls the other man away from his suitcase, practically trapping him in his arms. He tries to hide him from the world. Anyone who tries to take him away from him. Junhui’s tear-stained face presses to his collarbones and Mingyu wants the elder to hear his erratic heartbeat and probably understand the love Mingyu holds for him. 

“Don’t leave me. _Please._ I’m begging you. Stay with me. Just tell me you love me back. _Lie to me,_ I don’t care. I can’t do anything without you now. I need you to breathe.” Mingyu babbles as he smothers Junhui in his arms. 

“Don’t you understand? I need to be alone. I need to get away from you because I can’t take this any more. I am _weak_ for you. So weak.” The strain in Junhui’s melodic voice is the evidence of how much he hurts. “But I need to be rational now. Need to let you go.”

“You’re not listening to me. Don’t just make a decision on your own that will clearly destroy us both. I know you have a big heart. _Please,_ just listen to me.” All that’s left to do is beg. _Beg and beg_ until Junhui finally breaks and gives in. The elder manages to partially slither his arms out of Mingyu’s embrace and cups his face. It's an uncharacteristically tender action from someone who is adamant on ending things. 

“I _believe_ you, Mingyu. I do. But I’m not strong enough to love you. Even if I wouldn’t have found out about it on my own and you would’ve calmly explained the whole story to me, I would’ve ended up with the same decision.” The same decision of walking away from something that is meant to be sacred and precious. Breaking just not Mingyu’s heart but also his own. 

“You’re a wild lion destined to rule the world with your music and I’m a domesticated sheep, too innocent for the life you’ve experienced. It's easier to let go now when the feelings are still young. We’ll only end up suffering more if we decide to hold on to this _fairytale romance_ we’ve had. This whole week was the best thing that ever happened to me. But let's not ignore the fact that it was all built on pillars of sand, and they are slowly crumbling away because of high tides.” Junhui explains very quietly, with the patience of a man who seems way too mature for his age. 

Mingyu listens to his words and absorbs them. In all aspects, their love was not supposed to happen according to their initial plans. And it sure as hell didn’t deserve to be built on a house of lies. But then again, neither of the two ever expected that this affair would turn into something greater than the _Will of God._ They found a short respite in each other because of a familiarity that was eerily unfamiliar. 

He knows what the elder is trying to say. He’s seen it happen before with Jihoon. Mingyu watched him fall in love and then end up miserably with a broken heart all because his love couldn’t handle his fame and money. The only good outcome of that breakup was that Jihoon was able to write and produce a _grammy-winning album_ from his misery.

Mingyu never understood how deep Jihoon’s love was before. He just stayed with him and lent the other his hand during hard times like any other decent best friend. Although now he _understands_ his suffering. Can more than just understand. There is a sharp pain that has started to grow deep in his stomach. It tries to defy the gravity and make its way up out of his mouth. Mingyu resists the urge to do so but in the process, loses his balance and the grip over Junhui’s body. 

The elder silently moves away from him and resumes packing on Mingyu’s behalf. The latter looks out the window, his mind still trying to process the _tragedy_ that unfolded in front of him and the _catastrophe_ that finally brings an end to their love story. Junhui’s words from last night feel like a big, fat mockery to his existence — _‘their story isn’t ending anytime soon.’_

_Liar. Coward. Tenuous._ Mingyu thinks Wen Junhui is all that and even more. 

_Witty. Thoughtful. Sweet. Beautiful._ Mingyu knows Wen Junhui’s whole existence is made out of those qualities and so much more.

The sun shines brightly and lights up their surroundings but all Mingyu can perceive is the imminent darkness that is about to swallow him up and ruin his life. Mingyu can’t discern the surrounding colours. All he sees is _red and blue._ Red for the eternal, passionate love he holds for Junhui and blue for the melancholy that silently approaches him.

In his shocked state, Mingyu can’t grasp the concept of time any more. He isn’t sure if the time is even moving or the whole world came to a standstill. The sounds don’t reach his ears, and he does not even feel the gush of air swiping past his skin. He plays back Junhui’s words in his mind again and again where the other man concludes that it's best to separate. _Best?_ Mingyu hasn’t ever heard of a suggestion that could be worse than this. And that is coming from a man who has a reputation for having a reckless life. The man who has ruined hundreds of lives and manipulated thousands of innocent people.

“Mingyu?” He hears the call of his name and turns to look at the other man who stands beside his packed luggage. Junhui’s speckled face looks pale and lifeless, his nut-brown eyes look dark and empty. It's _evident_ on his face that he is hurting but trying to school his expression. Mingyu wants to do _something_ that will probably aggravate the situation. He wants to fray Junhui to his breaking point so that the elder stops trying to pretend that it isn't hurting him as well. His walls need to be broken down, his agony needs to be released in the form of tears. 

Mingyu is going to be selfless and break his heart more to fix this. Or at least _for once,_ let Junhui live for himself and not others.

“I want to give you my whole life. Nobody else can ever walk into my life and replace the _home_ you’ve built inside me. If you think it's for the best for us to separate, then let's do that. _I love you,_ Moon Junhwi. But let me tell you this _one thing,_ okay?” Mingyu speaks in a calm, deep voice while slowly diminishing the distance between the two. Junhui hesitantly walks back until his back hits the wall and Mingyu plants both his hands beside his head, bracketing him in his arms and leaving no route to escape.

“You want to live more freely, right? You want to have the _freedom_ to steer your own life and not live according to others’ wishes. Isn’t that right, hyung? I know you don’t want to live a life where two people own each other and treat their relationship like a property. Well, good luck on finding someone else who will let you enjoy that prerogative. But you know damn well that _I will never_ control you.” Mingyu says as he starts to lean in closer so that he can look straight into the elder’s eyes and make him see the connection they share.

“Never control me? Your words sure sound very _manipulative_ to me, asshole.” Junhui seethes, his anger surfacing back.

“Why are you looking at me like I’m suddenly the _fucking villain_ of your story? How can the love we shared vanish out of your eyes just like that?” Mingyu asks back.

_“Vanish?_ Baby, this is the resentment that comes out of betrayal. I trusted you with _my life._ I took a chance on you even when the whole world laughed at me for being too naive. I’m not mad at you. I’m mad at myself and just want to be left alone for the love of all that’s holy!” Junhui yells as he tries to get out of Mingyu’s clutches. Mingyu remains obstinate.

_“Holy?_ Oh, that reminds me. You’re a big believer of fate and destiny, right? You said we were brought together by this powerful _force_ that goes way beyond the confinements of time and space? Do you really think it's wise to dishonour those powers by breaking us up?” Mingyu knows he’s being terribly mean by ridiculing something that Junhui strongly believes in. But the cruel words form on their own over his lips. 

He can suddenly understand Junhui’s disdain of films. The media always showed that there was a beautiful lesson after the story ended. The separation always looked melancholic but poetic in a way with its own beauty. But _this is real life._ There is no such thing as a beautiful parting anyway. The ugliness takes over the human emotions from the lingering feelings of _betrayal and temper._

“Fuck you! You don’t believe in it!” Junhui screams from the pain that comes from the impact of Mingyu’s bullet-like words. Rather than apologising for his mistakes, Mingyu hugs him. Takes the elder’s body in his arms and holds him tight, eliminating even a millimetre of the distance between them. It is so _easy_ to bury his head in the other’s shoulder and let his tears flow out. In a way, his tears get soaked on the other’s shirt and it's _soothing_ that even as they part, he’s leaving behind his essence on the other.

“No, but I believe in you. And I’m so scared right now because _this is our end._ I don’t want this, my love. Stop it.” Mingyu says as he completely breaks down in front of _his life._

Instead of fighting back, Junhui’s hands encircle Mingyu’s neck and his fingers gently caress the back of Mingyu’s hair. It hurts, everything hurts so bad. But he needs to accept that the damage is done. Nothing he says or does will change Junhui’s mind. Who would want to _trust a liar_ anyway?

“Kiss me. If you still care about me just a little bit, _kiss me_ one last time before I go, Junhwi.” Mingyu pleads as he starts to leave open-mouthed kisses on Junhui’s neck while tenderly caressing the side of the elder’s cheeks. He breathes in honey, musk, patchouli and instantly realises that _this scent_ will haunt him for the rest of his life. The funny thing is he wants to be haunted for the rest of his life. He wants to be haunted by Junhui and will surely _bemoan_ the day when he manages to forget about the elder’s existence.

Junhui pulls the younger’s head back by his hair and messily connects their lips. Mingyu drowns in it as he desperately opens his mouth and loops their tongues to etch the sweetness to his memory. _Their bittersweet last kiss._ It’s all wet — saliva and tears combined. But the most integral part of it all is that the yearning is _magnified and mutual._ Mingyu wonders if this is something he will want to remember forever or just lock it deep inside the chambers of his heart, never to see the light of day again.

Junhui clings to Mingyu like an anchor and the latter fades into him and craves that his body is permanently covered with _Junhui’s lifeblood._ This soul-drenching kiss feels like a meagre band-aid over a deep, noxious cut.

_‘Goodbye.’_

_‘I’m sorry.’_

_‘I love you.’_

They both exchange these words silently.

Junhui finally manages to break the kiss and leans back on the wall, breathing heavily. Mingyu abruptly steps back and proceeds to collect his belongings. _This is it._

Their movements are robotic as they find their bearings and make their way to the main door of the apartment.

“Are you really letting me go?” Mingyu asks as a last resort, hoping for a miracle.

“Yes.” Junhui answers without missing a beat. He looks more put together now, his face showing an unusual stoicism that irks Mingyu. 

“How can you be so heartless, hyung?” Mingyu asks between his tearless sobs. Junhui looks at him with an impassive face for a few seconds until a snicker forms on his lips, and he snorts in disdain. 

“Hah! It’s funny that you are calling me heartless, Kim Mingyu when you should already know by now that _it's_ with you.” Junhui says coldly, his voice pricking needles over Mingyu’s skin but his tender gaze providing the younger much-needed affirmation. “I’m heartless because _you_ have my heart, my sweet love. The only thing that hurts is that I’m giving you your heart back but not taking back mine.” Junhui walks towards the door and opens it for Mingyu, picking up his luggage and depositing it outside the door. 

“Because I believe in fate and destiny, I will never _dare_ to fall in love again as long as I know you exist in this universe.” This is a _big mistake._ They are both making the biggest mistake of their lives by letting each other go. But unfortunately, Mingyu can’t seem to break Junhui’s walls. Even at the end of this road, Junhui manages to speak such profound words carelessly and expects Mingyu to not be affected by them. 

“You can’t say that. It’ll only make me want to leave behind everything I know and follow you to the ends of the world.” Mingyu replies. 

The very next second, Junhui, in a very unexpected show of brute force, pushes Mingyu out the door. The latter barely recovers from the shock and looks at the elder who grips the door with wide eyes.

_“Leave!”_ The door finally shuts on him and the light extinguishes from his life.

Mingyu heaves the heavy luggage down the stairs. 

He isn’t thinking at the moment. His heart has become so numb, and he can’t seem to understand his feelings. His finger and nose itch for something. _For poison._ No matter how detrimental it was to his whole life, it always took the pain away. Mingyu would very much like to not feel the pain at the moment.

More than anything, Mingyu would like to run back to Junhui and cry in his warm embrace.

He fishes his phone from the pocket and dials a number that is in his recent call log. The phone rings and Mingyu watches a woman jogging past him in her tracksuit. She’s clearly on her morning run which means the day hasn’t even properly started for Mingyu and his life has already somehow fallen apart.

“Hello?” The person finally picks up the call after the sixth ring.

“I– I need your help, _please._ I don’t know anybody else in this city and I don’t want to be alone at the moment. I’m s-so scared. _Save me.”_ Mingyu stutters with his speech. 

“What happened, bro? Where are you? Isn’t Jun hyung around?” The worry in the voice is discernible and the stable voice calms his heart, yet the absence of his _own heart_ kills Mingyu from the inside. Crying in public is never a favourable situation. People stare at you and some nosey fuckers even approach you to ask if you are okay. Mingyu loves when people give him attention. But only the people he cares about. 

As he hears Junhui’s name being uttered by another soul, tears start to pool around his eyes again. He can’t do this right now.

_“Seokmin,_ please. I’m all alone and feel like I’ll get into some kind of trouble in pursuit of dangerous leisure just so that I feel nothing. I’m so scared. Please, I can’t be alone.” Mingyu pleads relentlessly.

“Okay, okay! I’ll text you my address and you call an Uber right now.” Seokmin directs. Mingyu nods even though he knows the other man isn’t physically there to look at his affirmation. He has probably lost his mind. He calls an Uber while the call runs in the background of his screen. “Mingyu, send me your live location as well. And don’t hang up the phone, no matter what happens. Stay on the call. You don’t need to speak. Just _stay with me.”_

“Yes. Alright, I can d-do that.” Mingyu says as he struggles to calm his breathing. He eventually gets into the car and Seokmin guides him through breathing exercises to calm him. 

He wonders if Junhui has also lost his mind and is _hurting_ as much as him. 

  
  


~•~

  
  


Junhui sits on the piano stool and frivolously presses the keys of the bass clef area. The low notes echo aggressively in the room, creating a sombre ambience. Junhui just wants to drown in his sorrows and never see the light of the day again. What is the point anyway? _Helio’s object of affection_ is gone out of his life. Only darkness surrounds him. In his honest opinion, he _deserves_ this shitty ending. 

He should’ve known it was too good to be true. Everything was magical and beautiful. _Absolutely perfect._ He should’ve remembered the lessons he learnt from his past that behind everything that glitters from perfection lies a dangerous reality that is coated with lies and deceit. 

After waking up, when he read the replies he received from Seungkwan, the world he knew _collapsed_ below his feet. It was a _rude awakening._ But it was also a moment of awareness where he realised the person that he thought he knew and loved still held a private and mysterious life, something that Junhui couldn’t have imagined. A life where Junhui can never fit in no matter how hard he tries. 

But even after experiencing the _worst_ of the betrayal, Junhui can’t find it in himself to _despise_ Mingyu. The fact remains that Junhui said he would love Mingyu forever. It was _a promise. A pact. A vow._ And he wasn’t lying at all. He meant it. Every single word he said was the truth, only the truth and nothing but the truth.

Junhui thinks that maybe it's his fault that he remained blindsided to such an integral truth. Maybe he shouldn’t have trusted a stranger so readily and provided him shelter in an unknown place. Maybe he should’ve been more persistent in trying to learn about Mingyu’s background and not settled with vague answers. But then again, it wasn’t like he was honest about _his origins_ in the beginning as well. 

But compared to his origins, a stigma is attached to Mingyu’s origin. In all fairness, loving a person like Kim Mingyu is a _taboo_ for a person like Wen Junhui. 

It’s not that Junhui does not want to love Mingyu. _God,_ he needs the younger so bad. But as he searched up _Jade of SVT_ on his phone while Mingyu calmly slept in the morning and thought about all the choices he could make after talking to the younger, only one viable solution came to him. 

_The lead singer and guitarist of SVT and the heir of Wen Holdings Limited can never be together._

It just isn’t the homophobia that will keep them apart but also the fact that Junhui’s detractors would take his association with a troublesome artist as the perfect opportunity to bring down his father’s empire. _Once again,_ Junhui is forced to think about what others will think, about the expectations people have on him and the ideal actions he needs to take. As usual, he needs to let go of his own desires. But this time around, letting go _hurts like a bitch._

His whole body cries with the ache of pushing away his love, his heart, his life. It's devastating to fathom that he had Mingyu all this time in his arms, _lovely and precious,_ too madly in love with him and intimately close but now all that remains are the memories of a feeling that transcended heaven and earth and probably angered the gods for being too perfect. _Idyllic. Utopian. Absolute._

“You’re a fucking idiot, Wen Junhui.” He chastises himself as he pulls down the fallboard of the piano and gets up to walk to the bedroom. It's not even his house but as he walks and looks at every corner of the place, he is reminded of the memories he shared with Mingyu. Mingyu _dances on all the walls_ of this house. He's glad he’ll leave this place by the afternoon and won’t be reminded about the younger so easily. But then again, _who is he kidding?_ Mingyu lives inside him and his presence will follow him everywhere. 

Packing up his luggage is something that keeps his limbs occupied and his mind relatively empty. Although holding the things he bought in Argentina reminds him of a crucial fact that they were all bought after Mingyu approved his choices while staying by his side and keeping him happy and warm. 

_Fuck love._ He needs to throw it away. It's making him nauseous and inciting a war inside his mind. He tries his best to ignore the hundreds of voices in his head.

After finishing his packing, he lays down on the bed and inhales in _bergamot and cardamom._ A pang of guilt hits his chest as he wonders where Mingyu is at the moment. The younger was distraught and broken when Junhui slammed the door in his face. The absolute _worst_ part is Junhui and Mingyu never exchanged contact information because it didn’t even seem necessary before. They were practically together all the time. Junhui had planned to ask for it today. Well, planned. _Past tense._ Unfortunately, his _eternal love_ was numbered from the start. He was just too blind to unravel the lies behind Mingyu’s eyes. Life is just too cruel sometimes. 

He thinks of talking to someone to lighten his heart. Technically speaking, Wonwoo and him aren’t on speaking terms because of Wonwoo’s prior disapproval of his impromptu relationship with Mingyu. But now that the younger is out of his life (he can fool the mind but not the heart), he can finally speak to his best friend again. Without thinking much about it, he calls Wonwoo.

“Hello?” The _deep voice_ washes over Junhui’s conscience and reminds him that in a very convoluted way, Wonwoo was right, and he should’ve listened to his stubborn friend when he still had the chance to come out of the relationship unscathed.

“Wonwoo?” His voice sounds rough, his throat raw from sobbing vehemently for so long. It has been two hours since Mingyu left. Junhui still has four hours to kill until he has to leave for the airport.

“What's wrong, _Jun-ah?”_ There is something about the way Wonwoo calls his name sometimes, with so much consideration and affection, that makes Junhui melt on the spot and makes him forget about the walls he put up around himself.

“Why do you think something is wrong?” Junhui asks instead, trying to sound aloof.

“Okay, now I definitely _know_ something’s up. You sound like you’re trying to evade a very heavy conversation.” The distress in Wonwoo’s voice makes him feel guilty. 

“If I was trying to evade a heavy conversation, I wouldn’t have called at all, Wonwoo-yah.” 

“I guess. I’m glad you’re still alive, Junnie. Maybe I was coddling you a bit too much.” Wonwoo confesses.

“Did Seungkwan make you realise that?” Junhui asks with a giggle because it is so unlike Wonwoo to admit his adamant ways. But Seungkwan has skills of crawling under people’s skin and making them see the error of their ways so easily. Junhui sees the youngest as an _angel_ in his life who always guides him in the right direction. If it wasn’t for Seungkwan, who knows if he would have ever uncovered the truth behind Mingyu’s identity.

“Oh, please! Let’s not talk about it. You are not allowed to leave me alone with that _menace_ next time.” Wonwoo practically exhales the words with anguish. It makes Junhui laugh a little. The process feels foreign, stretching the dormant muscles on his face. The area around his eyes and mouth hurt with laughter but thinking about his friends’ antics brings the much-needed _respite_ in his heart.

“Alone? Wasn’t Chan there to back you up?” Junhui asks as he _recuperates from his laughter._ That’s a feeling Junhui never thought he'd experience. Apparently, even happiness feels like a forced emotion.

“Channie went to Iksan to spend some time with his grandmother four days back,” Wonwoo informs him. Junhui hums back, feeling like he should’ve done better in keeping up with his other friends. He was too busy falling for someone that wasn’t meant to be his. 

“Junnie?”

“Yes?”

“Are you still with _him?”_

Dark and gentle eyes flash in front of Junhui’s eyes. Followed by the prominent mole on the left cheek and the sweet lips that hold the sun. The _agony_ of absence grows.

“No. He’s gone. It was great while it lasted but the fantasy had to end.” Junhui says while closing his eyes because this bedroom has _memories_ that rub salt over his open wounds.

“Did he break your heart?” Junhui wants to laugh, but he remembers the pain from a while ago and resists. 

It’s not like Mingyu broke his heart. Love is an emotion that builds a person up and helps them face dire situations. But this world was created for _cruelty and destruction._ Nothing is meant to last forever on this planet. Everything comes to an end and there is nothing sweet about it. It's bitter and leaves behind ashes from its violent firestorm. 

Their _circumstances, status and distance_ are what broke Junhui and Mingyu apart.

“No, I broke his heart.” Junhui sounds lugubrious.

“Junnie, _shit!_ Junnie, I’m scared. Please tell me what happened!” Wonwoo implores but it sounds like a command to Junhui’s brain. Why do people think it's okay to _demand_ things from Junhui all the time?

“You sound worried,” Junhui comments instead, his voice sounding dull to his own ears. The heartbreak seems to be bringing the _malicious and dark_ side of Junhui’s personality. The face Junhui tries to hide so fervently. _The ugly side._

“Goddammit! Of course, I’m worried, you idiot!” Wonwoo sounds troubled and a little helpless. In a very strange way, his misery _fuels_ Junhui. The darkness within spreads.

“Well, I can tell you what happened. But only after you tell me what has been troubling you all this time, Wonwoo.” Junhui replies sharply. 

“Jun-ah, we talked about this–”

“Yes, we did. And you deflected the topic because you didn’t want to ruin my time here. But honestly Wonwoo? My time is up here. The holiday is finished and the only thing left to do is get a ride to the airport and fly back home. Fly back home to you. So stop treating me like I can’t handle whatever it is that is going on with you, do you hear me?” Raising his voice and talking so bluntly is very _unusual_ for Junhui. But he’s gone through a catastrophic event in his life. Things are bound to change.

“Junhwi?” Wonwoo’s voice sounds hesitant. It’s past midnight in Seoul and instead of helping him sleep, Junhui is probably doing the opposite. “What happened to you? You sound _different.”_

“Are you surprised? Don’t be mad. It’s not a bad thing that I finally have the courage to speak for myself, Wonwoo-yah. You used to be worried that people would eat me if I stayed by myself. Well, I guess I was able to find brevity somewhere along this holiday and it’s riveting. Aren’t you proud?” Junhui asks a little hysterically, the _maniac_ taking over his senses. 

“Not gonna lie but I’m a little scared, Junhwi.” Wonwoo’s statement makes Junhui laugh. The newfound feel of being in control is _liberating._

Well, Junhui did come to Argentina on the quest to understand what freedom was really about. In a way, he’ll say that his mission was _accomplished._ Even if he feels desolate and hopeless, he did manage to get the end result. Isn’t that what corporate life is all about as well? Doing whatever it takes to get the task done and making yourself look perfect in the process at the expense of morality. Essentially being _cut-throat and ruthless._

“Then you better tell me what’s bothering you, Wonwoo-yah. _Trust me._ Unloading your worries on me may take the edge off.” It’s a novel way of wording his worries but as long as he gets his words across, that's all that matters.

There is a moment of silence on the call, neither of them speaks a word. All Junhui hears is loud breathing accompanied by a lot of sighs. Junhui thinks of all the scenarios that could be the reason behind Wonwoo’s troubles. Maybe it's related to one of his exes or maybe he’s in love and it's unrequited. 

Or maybe, just like Junhui, Wonwoo is stressed about finally working under his father in _Jeon Group._ But the last possibility seems far-fetched because Junhui has watched Wonwoo aspire to take over the family business since childhood. Wonwoo was born to be a successful businessman. This is _Wonwoo’s calling._

“Junhwi, I was born and raised in South Korea. I can’t defer my enlistment any more and it’s high time that I start my conscription.” 

_Oh._ That’s right. Wonwoo is 23 years old and hasn’t enlisted yet. Junhui knew that after completing their postgraduate, Wonwoo would enlist himself, but he didn’t think it’d be so soon. When is his joining anyway?

“When are you leaving?”

After another long pause, Wonwoo finally speaks. “In 5 days.”

_“5 days?”_ Junhui practically jerks upright and screams into the receiver. “How long have you known about this, Jeon Wonwoo?”

Wonwoo sighs again. He’s lucky that they aren’t having this conversation in each other’s presence because his endless sighs are pissing Junhui off and the latter would’ve hit him. 

“It was finalised two weeks ago.” 

The ground shifts yet again below Junhui’s feet. Apparently, it's _‘National Betrayal Day’_ or something because the two people he held close to his heart stabbed him in the back. 

“Channie and I are enlisting together.” Even Chan is leaving him for 21 months. Well, he is also 21 years old and in his prime to join the military, Junhui thinks. He’s kind of glad Seungkwan finished his conscription a year back. 

Being a foreigner in your own home feels _odd and distant_ sometimes _._ He wonders if Mingyu feels the same way in the United States.

_‘Stop thinking about Mingyu!’_

Wonwoo keeps saying things and Junhui only registers some words that leave an impact on him — _scared, first time, love, apart, miss, you, phone call, basics, seniority, family business, me, wait._

Junhui wants to block out all his emotions. Emotions make humans weak if they are too intense. He needs to calm down because, for all the practicality reasons, he is alone and needs to make his way back to Seoul in one piece without doing something reckless.

“Wonwoo?” Junhui interrupts the other’s agitated monologue. 

“Yes?”

“I love you. Come have dinner at my house on Saturday.” It means Junhui is _done_ talking to Wonwoo for now. He does not want to talk to the other man for a while. “I’m going to hang up now. Goodbye.”

_“Jun-ah,”_ Wonwoo calls his name sternly. Whether he’s begging or commanding is unclear.

“Wonwoo, please. I need some time to think and gather myself.” Junhui says with a stable voice which surprises him because his being feels anything but stable.

“Fine.” At least Wonwoo knows him and understands when he needs space. “Have a safe flight back. I love you.”

Junhui ends the call with a heavier heart than before.

He closes his eyes and remembers that beautiful afternoon in Mendoza when he thought he could move the mountains and split the seas for Mingyu because of their love. He fondly remembers the look on Mingyu’s face after hearing Junhui’s confession. The younger looked winsome and tender, _too precious_ to hold in Junhui’s arms. 

He remembers their conversation the previous day — how anxious Mingyu sounded and talked about their _apparent circumstances._ Junhui didn’t understand what was so wrong about their circumstances but it all makes sense now. If Junhui was on the same page as Mingyu back then, he would’ve acted the same way. _If only._

It all starts to feel like a hallucination. He sees his own body from the corner of the room, _an out-of-body experience._ The man on the bed isn’t him but someone else. Everything starts to get fuzzy after that, his body moving on instincts and routine.

He watches himself walk out of the apartment and thank the host robotically. He gets an Uber to the airport. He remembers checking himself in. He remembers going through customs then getting through the security check. It's all the process that feels _arduous but familiar._

While he waits for his boarding call, he talks to his parents one last time before departing on a 35-hour flight. His mother sounds sweet and warm and his father sounds formal as usual but pleased that Junhui was finally able to find some independence. It's supposedly the start of acquiring one of the traits of being a leader. Junhui hums back and thanks them like a dutiful son. He ends the call.

The airplane takes off and Junhui flies up in the sky but the floor below him slips away, and he is _falling, falling and falling._

_Cold._

He feels so cold even when he’s wearing a warm sweater. The eyes that reflected flames are gone. There is nobody to hold him and make him feel warm. 

He subdues his emotions and tries to sleep. The mental exhaustion helps.

_He’s fine._ As long as he adapts himself to this coldness, he will be grand.

  
  


~•~

  
  


Mingyu finds himself in a small one-bedroom apartment in Recoleta getting consoled by Seokmin, a person he barely met a week ago. But something seems better than nothing. Plus Seokmin feels like a nice man who isn’t very critical of Mingyu’s past actions. That’s a _huge win_ in itself.

He lays down on the small bed and looks at the fan that spins along with the squeaky sounds. Seokmin should have the fan cleaned to rectify it, Mingyu thinks.

“So?” Seokmin says as he sits on the other side of the bed, leaning his head against the headboard.

“So.” Mingyu parrots.

“It’s been five hours since you came to my apartment. Care to fill me in about, I don’t know, _anything?_ What has got you so scared and why is hyung suddenly _the man who must not be named?”_ Seokmin asks while looking at Mingyu reproachfully. The latter groans from hearing Seokmin’s way of referring to Junhui. Seokmin had been thoughtful enough to give him space all this time and let him recover at his own pace. Mingyu has finally stopped crying and unfortunately, can’t escape reality for long.

“If I have to summarise everything, Junhwi found out about my real identity and as I had suspected, completely rejected my _Hollywood past_ and then proceeded to shatter my heart into pieces and threw me out of the Airbnb,” Mingyu answers bitterly. 

The memories come to him in waves, and they are inviting, taking him back to a time when he was able to find his inner self and forget about the old hauntings. The eyes that used to crinkle around the edges and the cheeks that became fuller from the formation of a huge boxy smile. The golden body that was painted with captivating moles. The lips that were meant to be kissed. _Still_ are meant to be kissed. _The good memories._ But the recollection of this morning is mighty frightening, a time when they both died from the inside in trying to maintain their pathetic reputations. Maintaining a specified stature. 

Mingyu _understands_ why Junhui did what he did. He’s had five hours to think, and he finally understands _the lion and the sheep_ reference. Mingyu metaphorically lives in a jungle and is free to do what he wants (his past actions being strong evidence of this privilege) whereas Junhui lives in a tamed holding and needs to follow a specific routine set by others. In a twisted way, Mingyu can’t live in a cage without losing his mind and Junhui can’t embark freely into a jungle without being hunted down and devoured by someone. 

“Found out? What do you mean? Didn’t he _already know_ about it?” Seokmin asks with bunched up brows. The reproach in his eyes grows.

“Umm, I couldn’t tell him,” Mingyu answers meekly.

_“What?_ I thought I told you not to lie to him. On the day when we met for the football match, and he told me that you guys were together, I was so sure that you had told him about your real identity.” Seokmin’s voice is loud and jolts Mingyu’s rationale up. “No wonder he kicked you out.” Seokmin comments in a low voice but Mingyu hears it. It stirs up an irksome emotion inside him.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Mingyu snarls.

“Bro, have you ever been betrayed before?” Seokmin asks.

“Several times.”

“No, I’m not talking about petty lies or deceitful acts. I’m talking about someone breaking your trust or confidence so badly that it affects your morality. Leaves you feeling worthless and naive for trying to flap your wings and fly.” Seokmin’s words sound palpably specific like he’s trying to point to a specific person’s turmoil. _Junhui’s turmoil._

There is something about the way Seokmin talks to Mingyu. The affinity with which he talks feels like Mingyu is talking to _an old friend._ He’s only experienced these instant connections with people after coming to Argentina. Maybe Mingyu is living in the wrong country. Maybe his profession demands alienation from others. 

But Mingyu appreciates Seokmin’s style of conveying his words. He desperately needs the voice of a friend who’ll keep him in check at the moment. If his old friends were here right now, they would have suggested hitting up their dealer to fix up some dope that would numb the pain. Mingyu wants to numb the miserable suffering. He _urgently_ wants to. But it's all wrong and there is no hope. It’ll just end up deteriorating his progress and bring him back to square one. 

“I know, I fucked up bad. I couldn’t be honest with him for so many reasons. Earlier, it was because I wanted him to know who I was as a human. Then, later on, it was out of this innate fear of losing him. I know I’m to be blamed in the end.” Mingyu finally _admits_ his mistake out loud. There is something purgative about accepting his shortcomings that makes tears roll down his cheeks. All the bottled up feelings of _anguish and rejection_ finally find an outlet.

“I mean, _for him,_ dating me could lead to unwanted scandals capable of ruining his reputation. Mine is already ruined but I can’t risk ruining his. I get why we can’t be together but it doesn’t necessarily mean I accept it.” Mingyu continues wistfully.

_“Scandal? Reputation?_ What are you talking about?” The change in Seokmin’s expression from grave to perplexed is comical. But Mingyu can understand his confusion. He only learnt about Junhui’s background pretty recently as well.

“Junhwi hyung is the heir to a very huge chaebol.” Mingyu supplies briefly.

“You’re lying. I don’t believe you.” Seokmin brushes off Mingyu’s statement. The latter shrugs in return.

“Are you serious? What the hell? What is it with rich people finding each other in a different country while they pretend to be someone else?” Seokmin cries incredulously, the pitch of his voice thinning by the last question. 

“Well, yeah. But it's over.”

“Like over _for real?”_ Seokmin asks as he comes down from his unreasonable outrage.

“Yeah. I don’t even have his number. Like, I know I can contact the head office of Wen Holdings Limited and ask for Moon Junhwi, but then they’ll ask the purpose of my call and then what am I meant to say? _I just called to say I love you. I just called to say how much I care.”_ Even in his terrible state, he sings Stevie Wonder’s song in tune. 

At least, no matter what happens, he’ll _always have the music_ and that’s incredible. 

“You know what? Let me brew you some tea to calm your nerves because you need it.” Seokmin announces as he leaves the room to the kitchen next door.

“Wow! A bartender is serving me tea.” Mingyu comments sarcastically. “That seems paradoxical.”

“Bro, say whatever you want, I’m not letting you get drunk or high until I finally put you on that airplane destined for your homeland,” Seokmin replies loudly from the kitchen.

Homeland. Home. He wants to go home. 

Mingyu had been thinking wherever Junhui goes could be his home. _A specific place._ But now he knows that home isn’t a geographic location but it’s _a person._ And that person evicted Mingyu out of his life.

It doesn’t matter how many big and elegant houses Mingyu buys with his money. He can always be a _house proprietor_ but that won’t change the fact that he will always be _homeless._

Seokmin comes back with a hot cup of chamomile tea. Mingyu drinks it wordlessly and feels the hot liquid flow down his throat. It emulates the _warmth_ that Mingyu misses and craves for. Drinking tea reminds him of Minghao and his obsession with drinking and collecting different types of teas. 

His phone starts ringing and for a second he wishes it was Junhui calling him. But he knows that it's an impossible feat and grabs his phone to see the caller ID — _Minghao Xu._

Think of the devil and the devil appears. Or in this case, calls.

The last thing Mingyu wants to do is talk to Minghao and hear the man tell him, _‘I told you so,’_ in a very self-righteous and conceited way. In fact, he wishes to speak to nobody. Seokmin is somewhat impartial and his presence will _suffice_ for now. 

“He must be calling me to remind me about my return schedule. Just inform him that I’m fine and send the pick-up car to your address.” Mingyu thrusts the phone into Seokmin’s hands. The latter panics and throws the phone back into Mingyu’s lap.

“Hey! Don’t ask me to talk to your people.” Seokmin argues. He looks completely horrified at the thought of talking to _‘Mingyu’s people’._ If Mingyu was in a better state of mind, he would’ve sympathised better with Seokmin’s discomfort and not coerce him to answer the call on his behalf. However, Mingyu’s heart has just suffered a horrible shipwreck, and he’s _drowning, drowning and drowning._

“Please, Seokmin! I’m begging you.” Mingyu pleads with big eyes and pushes the phone back in Seokmin’s hand after hitting the answer button.

“Wait, Mingyu! I can’t speak Engli– Hello!” Seokmin speaks into the receiver.

Mingyu can imagine Minghao firing up questions at the speed of light. He pities Seokmin a little.

“Slow, slow, slow. I only speak Korean and Spanish.” Seokmin speaks timidly, visibly not comfortable with the language. Seokmin removes the phone from his ears and puts it on speaker.

“Why do you have Mingyu’s phone? Who are you? I swear if you’re this Junhui guy and you have done something to Mingyu, then I know the law and you should be very scared at the moment. Your family’s influence won’t save you from my hands.” Minghao spits threats after threats rapidly. Seokmin looks at him exasperatedly. 

“What should I do here?” Seokmin asks aggressively while keeping his voice low. Mingyu shrugs back apologetically because even he is scared to have a conversation with Minghao at the moment when he sounds absolutely terrifying.

_“Oi!_ Only Korean! No English, please!” Seokmin wails like an obnoxiously loud siren. Though, it effectively shuts Minghao up. Mingyu is dumbfounded that Seokmin was actually able to _silence_ Minghao Xu. Even Seokmin looks surprised it worked, and they both look at each other with wide eyes. 

Their eyes go even wider when Minghao hangs up the call. 

The situation seems comical, a remake of _dumb and dumber._

The room screams in silence as Mingyu and Seokmin look at each other, recovering from the nightmarish phone call. Their respite is short-lived as Mingyu’s phone rings again in Seokmin’s hand. This time though, the name on the screen is different and in Mingyu’s honest opinion, quite unexpected — _Jihoon._

“Jihoon?” Seokmin asks dubiously. Mingyu nods dumbly.

“Are you telling me to speak to _Woozi of SVT?_ The genius songwriter and composer of our generation?” Seokmin asks again, completely dazed. A pout forms on Mingyu’s lips.

“Hey, I’m from the same band,” Mingyu says defensively, his eyebrows bunched together.

“Yeah, okay, _Woozi’s bandmate,”_ Seokmin says and rushes outside the room with Mingyu’s phone. 

To be honest, Mingyu isn’t really mad at Seokmin and gives him space to fanboy over Jihoon in privacy. It’s not like he even wants to talk to Jihoon. If talking to angry Minghao is like trying to clear a very hard level of a game, talking to angry Jihoon is like reaching the boss level. Jihoon isn’t even aware of the things that happened with Mingyu in the past week. Mingyu isn’t in a very good place to reiterate the story to someone else so soon. 

Seokmin comes back after a few minutes with a huge grin on his face that momentarily _blinds_ Mingyu. At least now Mingyu can relax easily knowing that he didn’t completely impose on Seokmin when they aren’t super tight, to begin with.

“I told him very briefly about what happened and requested him to not flood you with an inquiry for the time being. I texted my address to him, and he said he’ll forward the information to your manager.” Seokmin informs him as he gives Mingyu his phone back. 

“Thank you for your kindness, Seokmin-ah.”

“Don’t mention it. I got to talk to Woozi.” Seokmin says proudly. “Plus, I also want to confess that if I’m Woozi’s fan, I’m also _your fan._ I have always liked you as a musician and now that I know you, I know you are a _good man,_ Mingyu. I’m very grateful that you consider me as your friend and _trusted me_ in your time of need.” 

Mingyu didn’t know that after the events that took place in the morning, it could be possible, but he feels a _positive emotion_ blooming in his chest. Just like Junhui, Seokmin’s existence in his life is scanty. The impact left behind might not be as strong as Junhui’s (nobody could ever compare to him anyway) but it certainly holds a very crucial weight. It’s one of the _most real_ bonds he’s created with someone in a long time. At least he can try and hold on to this friendship. 

“Thank you for not having bad intentions and being a good friend. God knows how long I’ve been searching for one. I’m grateful that you accepted me even after knowing my reputation.” Mingyu replies in gratitude.

“Mingyu, everyone deserves a second chance and it should always come with kindness.” Seokmin replies as he pats Mingyu’s head lovingly. It makes the latter smile back. 

“I know you’re heartbroken and I don’t even know if you’ll ever be able to forget him. What I’m trying to say is that I know you’ll _never_ be able to stop loving him. I was a bystander and I could see the kind of connection you two had. It gave me _a-once-in-a-millennium_ kind of vibe. And I don’t want you to give up on him just because it's the best for the whole world, you know? Take some time. Let him recover from resentment and rage and in the meanwhile, _believe._ It’s clear that you both have _linked destinies_ and I have faith that you will find each other again when the time is right.” Mingyu gawks at Seokmin in wonderment. Just a few of his words are able to give him the strength to be patient and rational.

Mingyu takes the other man in his arms and hugs him tightly. The physical touch is assuring and reminds Mingyu that for the first time when life decided to kick him as usual, he gets to have a solid, warm body to console him and guide him to the right path. It’s the _little blessings_ that he needs to appreciate.

It’s easy to talk to Seokmin when the storm settles down. Mingyu isn’t truly happy but at best he can say that he isn’t trying to drown himself in his sorrows. After the sun goes down, there are people at Seokmin’s door to escort Mingyu safely back to New York. 

They exchange contacts, promises and gratitude one last time before Mingyu _leaves for good._

As Mingyu’s plane takes off, and he looks out the window to watch the city washed in lights, he thinks about a number of things. He wishes that he could whisk Junhui to some other universe where they are just two individuals basking in the _luxury of anonymity._ He’s also quite surprisingly at peace with the fact that as of now, Junhui probably hates him. As long as the feeling deep down is good, the elder could hate him all he wants. Maybe talking to Seokmin has _numbed_ his feelings to an extent. 

Mingyu whispers Junhui’s name quietly. The name that he’s known all his life. Studied, practised and memorised it. _Junhwi._

In a mystifying way, saying the elder’s name unloads pain from his chest, so he keeps repeating it again and again. Mingyu knows that the coming days won’t be easy. _Junhui’s gone._ The colours that had uplifted his dull life blur again to monochrome. But he’s _grateful_ to have found love in his hopeless life. Something that he always thought would never happen. In the back of his mind, he always knew that this love affair won’t last long. He knew karma is a boomerang, _a life circle._ All his past evil deeds were bound to have consequences and it came back to him, albeit, at a very terrible time. But he _accepts_ it. 

The only thing left to do is clear up his karma and try to make his way back to Junhui. Because as Jihoon said in his dreams and Seokmin said earlier in the day, no matter how harshly the storms try to uproot his life, he shouldn’t give up. Their _love is forever._ That was a promise, and he meant every single word he said. He knows Junhui meant them as well.

Hereafter, _Mingyu and Junhui will always have this Argentinian Holiday._

The memories. The experience. Love. 

He closes his eyes and leans back on his seat. After calming his breath and heart, he thinks of Junhui. _Lovely. Benevolent. Altruistic._

Mingyu _prays_ that no matter where the elder is right now, he feels the heat of his love and is embraced by his _warmth._

  
  


~•~

  
  


Somewhere over the Atlantic Ocean, Junhui’s perpetually freezing body finally finds some comfortable _warmth_ in his sleep. A small smile forms on his lips as he mumbles the name of his beloved in his unconscious state — _Mingyu._

His dreams are filled with dark and gentle eyes and sharp canines. 

He does not associate them with a nightmare. 


	9. Post-holiday Blues

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> trigger warnings: unhealthy coping mechanisms, mentions of implied/referenced homophobia

A month later after the holiday — June 10th

It’s a celebration. Junhui finds himself in a country club in the evening, immaculately dressed in a grey wool and silk-blend Ermenegildo Zegna two-piece suit. He holds a glass of barely drank Ramey and puts on his best smile for his day. 

_Socialising._ Making small talk with people he barely knows and establishing open-ended promises of becoming potential stakeholders for smaller companies. These conversations are easy mainly because they are not meant to be taken seriously. Junhui knows business deals aren’t made while alcohol flows freely around them but potential contacts are extended, and he needs to _network_ with as many people as he can even when everyone has practically gathered here to celebrate _his birthday._

One would think that Junhui would get used to all the opulence that surrounds him by the prime age of 24. Junhui is still _suffocated_ from within by it. Usually, each year, he had Wonwoo by his side to provide him escape from the suffocating atmosphere. This year, he only had a 5-minute phone call from the other at exactly 7:55 pm. 

  
  


_“Happy Birthday, Junnie.”_

_“Thanks, Wonwoo-yah.”_

_“How do you feel?”_

_Junhui takes a deep breath and contemplates whether he should lie or just be honest. He decides that honesty is the best policy for now._

_“Dead from the inside.”_

_“Jun-ah.”_

_The conversation becomes pointless after that._

  
  


Thankfully, the call ended quickly and Wonwoo was gracious enough to not ask stupid questions. Although, _one man_ has made it his life’s mission to be cruel to Junhui every single day by asking the same question. It really doesn’t help his case that the said man _lives_ with him.

After returning from Argentina, Junhui simply requested some _freedom_ from his parents in the form of living alone in an apartment in Cheongdam-dong. Initially, his parents were reluctant to let Junhui go off and do his own thing. But after a grand total of three painstakingly long dinner conversations, Junhui’s father gave him the green light and called up a real estate agent the next day to fix Junhui up with the _best_ accommodation possible. 

_Only two days._ He truly got to live alone for only two days until Boo Seungkwan showed up at his door with a few men carrying his thirteen suitcases and nonchalantly declared that he will take one bedroom out of the spare three for his own use. 

Junhui exasperatedly watched while sitting at the sofa how the men settled _Seungkwan’s belongings_ in _his brand-new house._

“Hyung, the commute to university would be easier from your place.” Seungkwan had put on his best defence back then.

“You just wanted to move out of family-friendly accommodation to a bachelor pad and this was the perfect excuse, wasn’t it?”

“Hehe, you’ve always known me the best, hyung.” Seungkwan had the _gall_ to look guilty even when he didn’t regret a thing.

Deep down, Junhui knew the _real_ reason why Seungkwan had decided to move in with him. It was simply because he was afraid to leave the elder alone. This fear was not like the ones everyone had before. The newfound fear came from the realisation that the _person_ who came back from Argentina was not the Junhui everyone knew from before. This new Junhui was practically a hollow shell of his former self, trying to immerse his mind in work just so that he could not find time to lament over the _loss of his heart_ in Buenos Aires.

Seungkwan asks the same question every day — _do you miss him?_

It’s practically laughable that Seungkwan can even _imagine_ that Junhui would suddenly stop missing him. But then again, the younger never witnessed the _love_ that Junhui and Mingyu shared for that one sacred week. 

Seungkwan has heard a fair amount of the fairytale holiday in bits and pieces, basically whenever Junhui feels strong enough to talk about the other. Seungkwan has always _understood_ Junhui the best even when the latter has a stronger bond with Wonwoo. Maybe it’s because Seungkwan is much better at reading people than Wonwoo. And this is the reason why Seungkwan hasn’t left Junhui’s side since the latter came back a month ago. Junhui is silently grateful that Seungkwan understands how he feels.

Almost every morning, Junhui _despises_ his existence as soon as he gets up and cries silently at having such a cruel fate granted to him. Almost every night, Junhui _curses_ himself for having lived another day without Mingyu by his side. 

“Hyung!” Junhui comes out of his melancholic reverie as he notices Seungkwan approaching him by dallying his way through the crowd. It’s easy to spot the boy with his dark blue hair that contrasts heavily with his all-black two-piece suit. Junhui envies him a bit because he is back to having dark brown hair. Any other colour over his head would be considered inappropriate for the workplace. 

“Come on! It’s time to cut the cake.” The younger one says as he extends his hands towards Junhui. The latter ungraciously accepts his hand and lets himself be pulled by Seungkwan.

“Yah! Cheer up, Moon Junhwi. The good news is after cutting the cake, we can leave the party.” Seungkwan tries to uplift Junhui’s mood. The latter hums in return, his expression remaining blank.

Although Junhui does a marvellous job at _pretending_ to be a cheerful man when he is forced to stand at the centre of everyone’s attention. He blows the candles and hundreds of people sing the happy birthday song. It all looks like a big, happy celebration where all the people live a seemingly picture-perfect life. Junhui can see the _cracks_ on the edge of the ceiling, threatening to expose the _shit show_ that everyone is trying to keep up. Instead of bringing everyone’s attention towards it, he keeps his mouth shut and makes the formal speech to thank everyone who came to the party to grace him with their presence.

After that, servers walk in with flutes of champagne and everyone downs the drink in Junhui’s name.

Seungkwan soon finds him and pulls him away from a group of people who seem to have millions of questions for Junhui but zero answers to give back. The _greed_ to know everything about people richer than them bleeds from their fake smiles. 

“I have called driver Park. He should be arriving outside in 5 minutes.” Seungkwan informs him. Junhui nods robotically and lets himself be guided out by the younger man. But just when they reach the doors to make their swift exit, Wonwoo’s mother calls their name and their escape is momentarily halted by her.

“Junhwi! My summer child! I’m so proud of the man you’ve become.” Wonwoo’s mother has a serene smile on her face. She is a beautiful woman and Wonwoo clearly has inherited his good looks from her. Junhui sees Wonwoo in her and is _reminded_ of the other man’s absence. It hurts. _Wonwoo. Mingyu._ The two men who taught Junhui the significance of having emotions aren’t with him anymore. How the hell is he supposed to express his emotions now?

“It’s all thanks to your blessings, eomoni.” Fortunately, Junhui is good at acting, in forming emotions over his face that have nothing to do with how he really feels. Wonwoo’s mother extends her hand towards him and cups his face in her warm hands. Junhui feels a spark of _warmth_ burst inside him.

“You and Wonwoo are the _future_ of both our families. Our businesses are bound for a merger in the coming years and it’s a relief that the future heads of the company are practically inseparable brothers.” It’s been an ongoing conversation for years in family gatherings and dinner parties. Wen Holdings Limited and Jeon Group are destined to become one big company, practically taking over East Asia in the future. It basically translates to more stakeholders, shares, revenues, profits and security; all the corporate jargon. And all of it would be initiated by Junhui and Wonwoo who have basically grown as inseparable best friends in the eyes of the public. Steadfast _trust_ leads to a brighter _future._

It’s expected to be a _national affair_ that would shake the entire country. But it’s not expected to happen in the coming 5 years. So for now, the pressure is easy to _ignore._

“I hope we both will be able to meet everyone’s expectations,” Junhui replies respectfully. 

“Hey! Where am I in the picture?” Seungkwan pouts from beside him. Junhui can clearly see that Seungkwan is trying to guilt Wonwoo’s mother for excluding him from the conversation. It’s not really her fault. The younger’s family owns one of the biggest pharmaceutical companies in South Korea but as Seungkwan already has two elder sisters, it’s _evident_ that he won’t get to lead the family business in the future. Although Seungkwan doesn’t mind the setup and is actually _glad_ that he can live his life more freely. 

“Oh no! I am sorry, Seungkwannie.” Wonwoo’s mother takes Seungkwan in her embrace and babies him like her own son. “I’m sure your hyung-deul will figure something out in the future.” 

“I am sure Wonwoo hyung will do everything in his power to keep me away,” Seungkwan whines further.

“I kind of have to _agree_ with you there, son.” Junhui laughs at her comment. She is such a naturally funny person. He wishes Wonwoo could inherit her _humour_ as well. Seungkwan protests further and she consoles him dramatically. Junhui laughs more at the comical scene in front of him and reminds himself that in the end, he is lucky to have found such a warm extended family. 

_It helps._ The perpetual pain dulls down to slight discomfort in the background. 

Junhui and Seungkwan make it back to the apartment and the latter opens up a bottle of 21 years aged whisky. 

“Tonight is a good night to talk, hyung,” Seungkwan announces as he pours the liquor over a huge ice block in the glass.

“We have talked about this, Seungkwan.” Junhui relents as he flops over the sofa arduously and takes the glass. One would think that Junhui would stop drinking alcohol after everything that happened. On the contrary, alcohol is his _new best friend_ who keeps him company on the worst of lonely nights. In the void in which he resides, he can’t be sober. But regrettably, Junhui doesn’t get drunk anymore. It kind of pisses him off. Seungkwan says that the liquor is wasted on him but Junhui still persistently drinks it in the hopes to forget. To wash away the ache and find all the answers that will bring _his love_ back. Bring _his heart_ back.

“You know, I used to think that you and Wonwoo hyung were bound to end up together. You both have always _danced_ around each other and in my eyes, it was kind of like the _endgame,_ you know?” Junhui hears Seungkwan’s theory and it takes him _longer_ than expected to make sense of it. 

“Wonwoo? With me?” Junhui asks dumbly, a little grimace forming on his face. 

“Don’t give me that look, hyung. Do you know how hard it has been for me to accept your friendship with him? Since the very beginning, Wonwoo hyung used to be extra protective of you and always took you away to his own house when all four of us used to play together, saying that kids weren’t allowed and all kinds of that childish bullshit. It really hurt my feelings back then.” Seungkwan confesses as he fills the jigger completely to top up his glass. He does the same for Junhui’s glass. 

“But you always had Chan.” Junhui manages to speak through clouds of confusion. He definitely didn’t expect that Seungkwan could be jealous of Wonwoo. Suddenly, their frequent skirmishes made sense. Junhui feels more dejected that two of his most important people never got along before _because of him._

“I’ll always have Chan, hyung,” Seungkwan says in a serious tone, a pretty pink colouring his cheeks. He looks pretty adorable and if Junhui was the same man as he used to be a month ago, he would’ve probably taken the younger in his arms and _cooed_ at his cute dongsaeng. Unfortunately, Junhui is constantly in a _state of mental exhaustion_ , his mind choosing to ignore menial tasks.

In the back of his mind, Junhui thinks maybe he is _depressed_ and probably needs to find some professional help to escape the darkness. But it is _easier_ to suffer all the horrible pain than do something about it. In a twisted way, Junhui wants to _burn_ in his yearning. 

He loves Mingyu. _Kim Mingyu. His Mingyu._ It’s the simplest truth in the whole universe. All his heart wants is to book a flight to New York and find Mingyu in one of the biggest metropolitan cities of the world. Find the man and hold him tight in his embrace till Junhui _drowns_ in the hard planes of the body and _tastes_ the warm sun that he craves. 

When Junhui thinks of love, it is so easy to forget about words like _‘I’_ or _‘you’_ but his duties force him to relinquish love. And he is cruelly reminded that his Mingyu is known as _Jade_ in this world. 

“I don’t think I understand what you’re trying to say, Kwannie.” Junhui tries to escape Mingyu by focusing on Seungkwan’s words. The latter sighs and smiles over _something_ that Junhui can’t comprehend. 

“Don’t worry, I have a hard time understanding it as well,” Seungkwan says as he makes the liquor dance in his glass by tilting it. “But coming back to the topic at hand, I’m actually quite surprised about the turn of events.”

Junhui doesn’t dare to voice a question. Talking is hard. Drinking is easy. So he takes a sip.

“Wonwoo hyung has been gone for a month and you haven’t whined about his absence once which is quite surprising because you both have been tight as thieves all your life. Like _Siamese twins_ or something, you know?” Junhui snorts at his comment. “I thought your separation will clearly bring you to your ultimate destructive phase. Not to say that you are clearly in the best space of your life at the moment but it’s clear that this Mingyu guy left an irreversible _impact_ on you.”

_Mingyu._ Junhui thinks it’s too soon to mention the guy at the moment and it sorely rubs at a burning spot in his heart. Junhui pours himself a double just because he’s allowed to show up at work after lunch tomorrow. 

“Seungkwan, you love secrets, don’t you?”

“Always have,” Seungkwan replies without missing a beat.

“Wonwoo and I dated for a week in high school.” Safe to say, Seungkwan chokes on his drink. Junhui shows zero remorse and does not help him recover from the slight discomfort. In his opinion, the younger asked for it.

“You– you are lying!”

“I swear on your life, I’m not lying.” Junhui shrugs back. 

“Don’t swear on my life, you idiot! High school was years ago! I can’t believe you hid such a crucial thing from me, your best friend.” Seungkwan grits through his teeth as he glares at the elder.

It’s funny. Junhui loves Seungkwan. He has always found comfort in the younger man. Even when the younger treats him as a dongsaeng most of the time, he also gives Junhui freedom to be his own person and spread his wings. For that brief span of one week, Mingyu was the same, probably even better. Mingyu has his own place in Junhui’s heart that can’t be compared with anyone else. On the contrary, Junhui sees _traces of Mingyu_ in everyone else he knows. His parents, his younger brother, Wonwoo, Seungkwan, Chan. _Little bits. Pieces. Fragments._

“It was very weird, Seungkwan-ah. It’s as you said that we have always been glued to each other. We both could feel it too. The days when we didn’t hang out together felt so dull. So naturally, we both came to the conclusion that we should, I don’t know, date or something. That maybe our love was greater than something we could understand.” 

“Then why did it end in a week?” Seungkwan looks at him eagerly, almost leaning over the sofa to invade Junhui’s personal space. 

“Because for that one week, we both avoided each other like the plague.”

“What?”

“Yeah, it was weird but like, we’d make up every single excuse in the book just so that we could _not_ be around each other. Our creativity in coming up with the reasons was off the charts at that point. It was like just the thought of seeing _Wonwoo as my boyfriend_ gave me panic attacks. And it was the same for him! So obviously we both texted each other after a week and called it quits. And sure enough, after that, I left my house and walked up to ring Wonwoo’s doorbell without any hesitation.” 

Junhui narrates the story fondly because now that he thinks about it, it’s ridiculous. _Hilarious. Truly ludicrous._

“We both took an oath to never speak about it to another soul.” Junhui finishes.

“Well, I am another soul.” Seungkwan retorts.

“We both have matured now. I’m sure he won’t mind that some foolish promises from our childhood were broken years later.” Junhui defends himself. 

“In essence, Wonwoo and I are _more than friends_ but _not much of lovers,_ I guess.” He adds it quietly to himself as an afterthought. 

Seungkwan looks like he’s gone through a minor catastrophic event so Junhui decides to give him time to recover and calls in for the night. Before opening the door to his room, Seungkwan scrambles towards him and his body gets scooped into a crushing back hug. 

“I love you, hyung. I really do with all my heart. I _always_ rely on you because being with you is so comfortable. I _wish_ you would rely on me as well and share your burdens with me. I miss my _bright and mischievous_ Jun hyung.” Seungkwan whines, the alcohol making him say the things he normally won’t. 

Seungkwan’s body behind him is warm and solid. _Real._ The tears in Junhui’s eyes sneak up on him, and he feels a few drops meandering down his cheeks. Maybe Junhui can never forget Mingyu. Maybe he simply never wants to forget Mingyu. But he can try to come out of this dark place. He knows he is lost in the middle of this _burning hell_ and all the _angels_ are trying so hard to bring him out. 

Junhui guides Seungkwan to his own bedroom and helps him wash up. After making sure the younger is all clean and tidy, he tucks him to bed. In the darkness of the night, Junhui’s affection flows from his heart, and he bends down to leave a small kiss over Seungkwan’s cheek. He maps the three moles beside his left ear then moves his fingers over the moles over the cheek, below the left eye, beside the eye and silently thanks his existence. 

_Seungkwan is pretty and Seungkwan is his._

Junhui quietly walks back to his room, his motor skills barely staggering under the influence of alcohol. He knows he’s drunk but his emotions _overpower_ the chemicals, and he knows he’s sober. 

In his own bed, he concludes that still loving Mingyu after all that has happened is almost like a _sin._ And it’s not just affecting him but also everyone else close to him. He’s so glad that Wonwoo isn’t around because the latter would have probably done everything in his power to ruin Jade’s career. Junhui wouldn’t have been able to hold him back and watching his lover’s ruination would have been the _harshest_ thing in the world. 

He can’t allow himself to go back to Mingyu’s side. Loving someone else, if at all possible in his dictionary now, won’t be the same. Mingyu is what he wants to have and what he has always wanted even before he met a man like Mingyu and learnt about him.

Junhui needs to _let go_ of Mingyu. 

Junhui needs to _forget_ Mingyu.

_Junhui needs Mingyu._

  
  


~•~

  
  


Two months later after the holiday — July 12th

For Mingyu, it’s easy to disengage from _reality_ by staying inside a recording studio. He practically lives here now and has converted one of the artist’s lounges as his own room. He rarely ever has to leave the building because the food gets delivered easily and Minghao gets his daily essentials promptly.

And the top management is more than happy to see their artist dedicating his full time in creating art that will earn them millions of dollars. They see everything in _profit and loss_ paying no heed to how their artists feel. It’s the _cruel reality_ of the music industry. 

This industry has been _hijacked_ by the interests of corporate firms. Nobody gives two fucks about talent. If your music sells, you are the best. _Material success._ Now it’s up to the artist how they choose to publicise their music. As much as Mingyu hates to admit it, his troublesome past had always helped his band stay relevant. He’s aware that their music might have touched the hearts of some people. But mostly, it’s the _fantasy_ that they portray that compels people to forfeit all their _mortal possessions_ to them.

It was kind of fun, once upon a time, to play the part in the grand scheme of things. He had everything — drugs, hoes and money. The _power_ to take over the world. He used to be a _king,_ who had a throne waiting for him from where he was meant to _rule_ the bloody planet. 

It’s not fun anymore. It’s a miserable game that he’s _forced_ to play. 

His world has been burning on fire for the past two months. The _perpetual inferno_ that surrounds him makes him feel like he resides in the _bottom pits of hell._ The heat is not pleasant but scalding and singes his body, mind and soul. He wants to crawl out of this mess but only one person can pull him out by their warm hand.

No one can save Mingyu _except Junhui._

After flying back from Buenos Aires, Mingyu had booked a flight to Seattle and finally took the most dreaded step of his life — facing his family with all his demons exposed. 

  
  


_Back in his family’s home, Mingyu feels bizarre to walk in the same house he grew up in and not recognise a thing. Things have changed drastically in his absence, and he remembers that change is the only constant notion in life. Once upon a time, Mingyu used to run up the stairs carelessly, his heart and mind filled with childish innocence. Now he physically feels like a giant as he walks in the hallways, the homely mess replaced with immaculately clean art pieces on the walls and shelves._

_His parents are awkward with him but Mingyu can’t even blame them. He is their son, but he is also a stranger to them. With every step he takes towards them, his distress and agitation also increase. His former home is filled with terrible emptiness. Or maybe it is all in Mingyu’s head, and he really needs to shed the unwarranted apprehension._

_His parents decide to give him space while Mingyu tries to remember who he was before he became Jade. He stays in his old room, the single bed replaced with a queen size for guests, all his posters and drawings removed from the walls that were painted blue. He sits in the backyard and lies on the lounge chair, watching the light drizzle replenish the plants. The overcast weather of Seattle resonates with Mingyu’s life funnily. He’s blue and misses Junhui. He was never good enough for the elder and hence they aren’t together. It’s pretty simple._

_They shared their hearts with each other yet Mingyu ended up being unfaithful to Junhui. Mingyu is completely bamboozled by the fact that Junhui’s presence in his life was only for a week. 7 days. Those 7 days felt like 7 lifetimes. Never-ending and perfect._

_Mingyu thinks he’s breathing fine even when he’s not fine. His rational mind wants him to forget and move on as any sensible human would. This heartbreak is dangerous and can lead to Mingyu’s destruction. But humans don’t play by rationality when it comes to matters of the heart. Desires are strange and bring out the foolish nature of humans. Mingyu’s emotions are mostly muted as he prefers to not care about anything. He’s mentally exhausted and it feels like if he were to engage in even a brisk activity with others, he will mentally breakdown and cross the point of no return._

_After a few days of his return, he finally decides to have ‘the talk’ with his parents. Everyone exchanges a lot of words — worry, apprehension, affirmation, gratitude and regret. It’s a mind-numbing experience to finally be rebuked by his parents for being a mess after all these years but Mingyu welcomes it openly. Because deep down he knows he’s been let off easily by just getting a lecture. He deserves a lot worse for his past sins but his parents are angels who love him unconditionally._

_“You’ll always be my son, Mingyu. No matter what path you decide to take. We are family and your birth will always remain as one of the happiest moments in my life.” Mingyu’s father says as he takes Mingyu in his arms. His mother watches from the sidelines, crying tears of joy as she finally finds her child back._

_Mingyu doesn’t deserve kindness but blood bonds are indestructible. And it’s the family that silently vows to stand by your side when things fall apart._

_His family forgives his past and takes him as their own again. Mingyu believes that he’s finally solved one of the major issues of his life._

_The good thing about having an off time is that Jihoon is also back home in Seattle. So one day, Mingyu hesitantly asks if the elder is willing to drive with him to Ocean Shores knowing in the back of his mind that the other man usually rejects his adventurous propositions. Jihoon agrees easily and the next morning, both of them drive down south to Olympia from where they turn towards Aberdeen, driving through the Capitol State Forest. It’s a quiet ride, music being their only solace._

_Jihoon dozes off in the middle of their trip but Mingyu can’t seem to mind it. After all, Jihoon looks cute while he sleeps, all his rage and clownery stripped off. Mingyu appreciates that. Sometimes Mingyu looks at Jihoon and sees traces of Junhui. Both have the same penchant of dealing with their problems as soon as they arise and apparently they get bored with a peaceful environment easily. The two men are literally the kind of people who end up finding peace in the middle of chaos._

_By the time they reach Ocean Shores, it’s still morning as they left the house around 6 am and it's currently 8:45 am. Thankfully, the beach is fairly empty, and they don’t have to bother disguising their appearances. The sun shines behind them, a change from the dull weather of their hometown. They both sit on the damp sand, their clothes soaking the moisture which makes the sand stick to it._

_Jihoon, being the blunt man he is, asks the million-dollar question as Mingyu tries to bask in the peaceful decorum, watching two seagulls walking around each other._

_“Do you think you’ll ever get over him?”_

_Mingyu snorts loudly. But after staying in denial for so long, he finally allows himself to feel something. To remember the time he was the happiest in his life and along those blessed moments, he remembers the heartbreak. He faces the ocean in front of him and watches the tranquil water hit the rocks madly, letting the water run freely with sad rage. It all reminds him of Junhui and all the visuals and emotions start to tangle into deep solitude._

_Junhui is so far away from him, on the other end of this planet and Mingyu can only recollect the rich scent of honey, musk and patchouli in his pitiful remembrance._

_“I think what you should be asking is will I ever try to get over him instead,” Mingyu replies. After all, forever means for all future time without any end. Jihoon sighs in return._

_“You know, after all that happened, as your best friend, I tried to hate this Junhwi on your behalf. But I gave up because he is an angel and deserves love for all the things he went through. I respect his decision of ending the relationship. Imagine a Korean businessman dating an American rockstar. Nobody can ever date you without the issue reaching the first page of every single major magazine and trending on Twitter worldwide. That’s the biggest risk that will ultimately expose Jun’s sexuality. I mean, even if he is not a Korean born national, his family’s business is heavily based in the country. The knowledge of a gay businessman will be detrimental.”_

_Memories of Junhui emerge from the ocean in front of Mingyu and wrap around him like stardust giving the warmth he desperately seeks. It’s comforting and keeps him upright even after Jihoon decides to flay him mercilessly. The truth is bitter but hearing from someone else’s lips feels like rubbing the salt on the gaping wound. Mingyu wants to scream in agony._

_“And think about yourself. You aren’t officially out as a homosexual. People just assume you have an eccentric lifestyle and will go downtown with anyone just for that fleeting seconds of pleasure under the influence of drugs. The company heavily profits from your stack of scandals and doesn’t even try to shed away the baseless gossip.” Jihoon chides him, clearly not complacent of his past._

_“It’s not my fault if people still question my sexuality. The right person can see it instantly. Jun was able to figure it out from the moment we met. Besides, I am not answerable to anyone, Ji.” Mingyu defends himself petulantly, his emotions going haywire after being repressed for so long._

_Jihoon stretches his limbs, their bodies cramped up from the long drive and hears the cracking of the bones. Jihoon is so pale, the result of rarely stepping outside but under the rising sun, Jihoon shines like a diamond. His existence in Mingyu’s life is so precious and lovely. It’s as pleasant as walking down barefoot on wet grass. A small smile grows on Mingyu’s lips despite everything. He’s glad that after his detractors burn down his castles, he can still always rely on Jihoon as the man who’ll stay by his side forever. They have been together for years and even after all the wear and tear, their bond remains strong against the passage of time._

_“As I try to perceive your love that somehow surpasses our realm, I’m reminded of a saying.” Jihoon breaks the silence after a while._

_“What?”_

_“Absence is to love what wind is to fire. The wind can easily extinguish a small fire but it also ends up inflaming the bigger one.”_

_As deep as the meaning of the saying goes, it only makes Mingyu laugh hysterically. But Jihoon is right. All this distance won’t make him forget Junhui. Far from it. All this time, Mingyu’s love for Junhui has been growing steadily, simmering gently waiting for that day when it will finally reach its boiling point and overflow into the world._

_Mingyu does not wish to imagine what would happen if his boiling point is reached._

_“Maybe you should channel all these feelings into writing songs,” Jihoon suggests airily._

_“Aren’t you scared that I might take your title of the genius songwriter and composer of our generation?” Mingyu asks cheekily, the small smile replaced by a teasing grin._

_Jihoon gets up and dusts his clothes to remove the wet sand. Mingyu follows his actions, and they quietly walk back to the car._

_It’s finally when they get inside the car that Jihoon, in his rare moment of expressing his love, decides to drop words laced in honeysuckle that ignite a new fire inside Mingyu._

_“Just knowing that you are doing well will always be my greatest source of happiness. You are one of the most important people in my life, Mingoo.”_

_Mingyu cries over the steering wheel relentlessly as Jihoon pats his back, encouraging him to let it all out._

  
  


Mingyu is shaken out from daydreaming of the past by Jihoon. 

“How long have you been warming that sofa with your ass?” Jihoon asks as he settles on his chair and switches on the monitors. Mingyu sits properly with a yawn and rubs the sleepiness out of his eyes. 

“Long enough,” Mingyu replies bluntly.

“I’ll probably have it incinerated after you leave.” Jihoon deadpans. 

All Mingyu has ever wanted is a peaceful, adult discussion between them. He wants Jihoon to talk straightforwardly. He would really like to change the way the elder talks. He would also like to criticise the other because he can’t let Jihoon get the best of him.

“Ji! Don’t–”

Jihoon interrupts Mingyu’s comeback indignantly, “Anyway, you wanted me to listen to one of your songs?” 

“Oh?” Mingyu is caught off guard. “Yeah, if it’s okay with you.” He offers dubiously. 

Jihoon lazily hums back and opens the file on the drive. After clicking play, Mingyu’s song drifts through the speakers and replaces static silence in the studio. The bass and treble _overpower_ their surroundings and Mingyu _drowns_ in his remembrance.

Jihoon listens to the song with his eyes closed and his head nodding to the beat. The man starts to move his fingers to every third beat and Mingyu knows that Jihoon only does that when he actually _enjoys_ the music. The eagerness to get Jihoon’s approval increases tenfold.

“What’s the name of the song?” Jihoon asks as the song comes to an end.

“If I.”

“It’s mostly in Korean and the genre isn’t even the kind of music we make.” Jihoon remarks as he replays the song but decreases the volume, so they could still talk over the music.

“I know.” Mingyu agrees easily. 

“The instrumental chorus, it’s _hauntingly beautiful._ Heavy use of bass guitar and synths, something I wouldn’t expect from you.” Jihoon notes his observation.

“Yeah, those sounds kind of resonated with how I felt while working on the song.” Mingyu justifies. 

It’s a song he made with Junhui on his mind for Junhui. He featured the _melancholic_ factor of heartbreak and agony by incorporating the low and dark chords of bass and in the process, also highlighted the _bubbly and bright_ nature of Junhui by adding the synth over the peppy beat. The lyrics happened to come off on the paper in a moment of a _stream of consciousness._ It comprises emotions that try to bleed the essence of the precious memories whose footfalls _echo_ in the distance.

“Do you want to include it in the upcoming album?” Jihoon asks while looking at him with eyes that seem to bore holes in his soul. Mingyu feels uncharacteristically exposed.

“No! I-I didn’t make this song for commercial purposes. Besides, I don’t want him to hold this _against_ me. He already has this demeaning belief that I will write songs about him and profit off them. He literally thinks I just used him for personal gain when that is far from the truth.” Mingyu says dejectedly.

He runs his fingers through his hair that has been dyed red. His bandmates along with Minghao make fun of his choice of colour and practically call him a _tomato_ but Mingyu pays no heed to it because he did it for the _symbolism._ To remind himself of a _lover_ who readily lost a challenge to make him happy.

“You are a musician. It’s valid for you to use someone as your muse for creative purposes.” Jihoon argues back a solid point. 

“I’d rather not,” Mingyu replies. “I don’t want him to be my muse. I want him to be _my life.”_

“It’s a beautiful song, Mingoo.” Jihoon compliments him and Mingyu feels like he’s climbed the _pinnacle of Mount Everest._

“But if you don’t want to release it, then I won’t push it.” Jihoon shrugs back and goes back to work. The studio album they are currently working on needs finishing touches and the label has already decided the release date and revealed it to the public. They _don’t_ have time to procrastinate.

Mingyu had always believed that this world was _designed_ to break his heart. So he kept his wishes at bay and enjoyed life as it came. He never _dared_ to dream because he has always had this _fear of failure._ For him, dreams are like a broken-winged bird. Even after having the wings, the bird can’t fly and agonises in pain. In the same way, if his dreams never become a reality, he’ll surely be disappointed and rebel in a toxic way. So it has always been easier for him to not dream.

Mingyu never dreamed that he would _meet someone like Junhui._

But he did. And he fell in love. 

He gave himself to love by falling down the cliff with a racing heart and a twisted stomach. But instead of _fearing_ his end, he was _excited_ about the depths he’d get to uncover. And he peeled off layers to reveal the _brightest moon_ in this universe. The most beautiful and terrific thing. 

And, Mingyu never dreamed that he would _lose someone like Junhui._

But he did. And he still is in love.

The Argentinian holiday feels like it _resides_ in another dimension of life that nobody wants to believe in. This world exists as much as the corporeal one; a world between _always and never._ This is where Mingyu and Junhui will exist as a _single entity._ This is where Mingyu will _always love_ Junhui.

The two men are embossed in the streets of a foreign land, in every dish they ate, every place they visited, the combined scent of bergamot, cardamom and honey, musk, patchouli lingering behind like scar tissue _commemorating_ the impact it left on the two souls.

Forever.

  
  


~•~

  
  


Three months later after the holiday — August 17th

_Monotonous meetings. Overtaxing calls. Client lunches._ Junhui thinks his life revolves around these tasks. 

But that’s the thing — it’s work and this is the only aspect of his life that is unconstrained. He practically trained himself all his life for _this job._ He can pretend that nothing grave happened in his life the moment he sits on his desk and pulls the big pile of documents and reports he needs to go through and sign. It’s only when he works that Junhui can _recognise_ traces of his old self. He is an impeccably professional individual who _perseveres_ to work hard to finish his goals without taking shortcuts. He likes to go over every single detail until the final product has become _perfection._ Junhui is a patient man who has a deep respect for _traditional values_ yet somehow brings in the _modern approach_ to business strategies.

In three months time, Junhui has become the board's _favourite facilitator._

Unfortunately, the moment Junhui steps off work, his emotions drastically recede like the waves from the shore, and he feels _nothing._ Junhui only believes in a professional life now. The concept of personal life seems tiring. The moment he steps into his apartment, his body deflates like a balloon and his face becomes ashen. After all, the act ends at his threshold and there is no show to put up at home. 

Junhui has become _comfortably numb._

He avoids calls and invites from all his friends from school and social circles. It’s elementary to tell them all that work renders him spiritless. Most nights he drinks to forget. He feels the alcohol burn in his stomach that momentarily _stimulates_ the warmth that he misses. Some nights he plays the Shigeru Kawai grand piano his mother had installed in his apartment because she didn’t want Junhui to lose his love for music. So he loses himself to the melancholic chords of the music and dreams of a _bubble_ which can’t be accessed by anybody. Only Junhui and Mingyu exist in that fantasy and no one is able to find them there. _Incognito. Vanilla. Safe._

“Hyung?”

Junhui just wants to peacefully rot in his doldrums but according to Seungkwan, that is out of option.

“Boo Seungkwan. How can I entertain you tonight?” Junhui asks rhetorically in a monotonous voice, placing his iPad on the coffee table. He can go over the skeletal program of the meeting that is to be held tomorrow in the morning itself. 

Seungkwan wordlessly walks over to Junhui and situates himself in between the elder’s thighs. While the younger man leans in, Junhui furrows his eyebrows in absolute bewilderment because this level of intimacy is _unusual._ Seungkwan runs his fingers around Junhui’s nape and then gently brushes his hair at the back. Junhui sees the warm tones of almond eyes looking at him so _tenderly_ that a part of him screams to get closer to this _warmth_ although he knows that it is wrong. So he chooses to take derision as his default route of defence mechanism.

“Are you going to kiss me?” Junhui whispers in the haziness of the moment. Seungkwan closes his eyes and breathes a sigh of relief. He then retreats back and sits beside Junhui on the sofa like a normal human being. Sadly, Junhui _misses_ the warmth.

“Glad to see that your ridiculous streak still prevails inside you in the midst of all the sadness. Not all is lost, and I am going to hold on to that.” Seungkwan says as he steals Junhui’s drink instead of fetching himself a new glass.

“Seungkwannie, you know what? I appreciate the concern but please stop. I’m fine!” Junhui declares loudly as he glares at the younger, irritation simmering in his bones.

Everything is _fine._ Perfectly _fine._ Spotlessly _fine._

Fine, fine, fine.

Junhui hates the word _‘fine’._ Hates how it sounds. Hates how it forms inside his mouth like rubber and comes out like a disgusting lump of vomit.

The sad reality of his life is that except for Seungkwan, Wonwoo and Chan, _nobody_ knows about his inner turmoil. Nobody knows that _Junhui’s heart_ is somewhere in the United States with a _man_ who has dark and gentle eyes with skin that tastes sweeter than honey. His heart is with the man who happens to hold the sun on his lips because he is _Helio’s object of affection._ Even his own family is clueless about his tribulations. 

So for the time being, only the three men remind him time and time again to forget. Wonwoo and Chan ask him to forget through the brief text messages and phone calls and Seungkwan has made it his life’s mission to make Junhui forget. 

_Forget Mingyu._

Even Junhui wants to forget the _face_ that he wants to love and cherish forever. He wants to forget how _adorable and sexy_ Mingyu can be at the same time. Wants to forget the _mole_ on his left cheek and the sharp _canines_ that make him look like a dangerous puppy. Forget the tranquil _scent_ of bergamot and cardamom.

_Forget Mingyu._

And pretend like that one week in Argentina _never happened._ Pretend Mingyu is not deeply _buried_ inside every single cell of his body. Pretend like he _never found_ his destined partner and _ignore_ the fact that every single star and planet in the universe conspired to have them meet in a foreign land, away from familiarity.

_But why should he forget?_ It makes no sense.

“Hyung. I’ve been thinking about your story. About this whole elaborate design of fate you believe in, about the events of your holiday and your feelings. It’s been three months and if I understand humans correctly, by now, you should have moved on from this brief love affair that you encountered on the trip.” 

“Please simplify your words, Seungkwan-ah.” Junhui interrupts him abruptly. “I don’t have the mental capacity to comprehend your 200 IQ words.” He is tired, but he won’t ever miss the opportunity to mock Seungkwan. Junhui’s brain is _wired_ like that, so he can’t be blamed.

“Yah! Moon Junhwi!” Seungkwan scoffs and hits his arm for good measure. Junhui barely registers the pain. “Anyway, what I am _trying_ to say is that you don’t even put any effort into trying to forget him. Especially when your playlist nowadays only plays SVT songs. Yeah, you thought I wouldn’t even notice that?” Seungkwan throws him a judgemental look and Junhui decides there is no point in putting up a front.

“You love him. I don’t know Jade as a real-life person but you, Moon Junhwi, fell for him which is like a _big deal_ on its own. And I can only conclude that he must be a really _great_ man and probably as much in love with you as you are with him. Even now, the love you both share is not the _problem_ here.” Seungkwan explains with vigour. He’s probably thinking he’s Sherlock Holmes right now and has solved the greatest mystery of all time.

“The problem is that _your Kim Mingyu_ is an American based artist whereas your life _belongs_ here in South Korea. Your great love can’t have you both sacrificing your responsibilities. I know in books and films, it’s easy to show the renunciation of one’s life and the transition is always so smooth and seamless but this is reality and all that is _romanticised bullshit.”_ Seungkwan adds further.

“Can you _please_ come to the point before the sun comes up?” Junhui asks impatiently.

“Maybe you both can’t move on because your end _wasn’t right.”_

To be very honest, Junhui can’t clearly remember their last day together. His mind has been actively trying to block out the memories of that horrific time, repressing the emotions he felt that day. Although, one thing that still remains clear as a crystal is Mingyu’s tear-stricken face. It terrorises Junhui. Whenever he remembers that face, he feels like his limbs are bound by ropes while he undergoes flagellation. The hit of the whip burns on his body, but he helplessly suffers the pain.

Maybe Seungkwan is right. Junhui knows that their love story is doomed, to begin with, but maybe instead of burning a bridge which is still being crossed by vehicles, he can first have the vehicles and pedestrians evacuated before burning the overpass.

In simple words, Junhui decides that he needs to let Mingyu know that he holds no grudges against him and let him go for good. _Gently. Tenderly. Lovingly._

Because love is what Mingyu _deserves_ after all the atrocities he’s been through. 

_Love_ that Junhui wants to give but can’t.

“You’re right,” Junhui admits meekly. 

Apparently, Junhui’s words take Seungkwan by surprise because his jaw drops to the floor and his eyes go wide like saucers.

“You are agreeing with me here?” Junhui wants to slam his own head over the coffee table. Maybe the _sweet release_ of death would be more merciful.

“Stop being dramatic.” Junhui disregards his tomfoolery. “Now I suggest that you should start doing your detective work.” He says as he gets up from his place and saunters towards the kitchen to put away his glass in the sink.

“Detective work?” Seungkwan asks dumbly.

Junhui looks at him humorlessly. He used to think Seungkwan could read his mind. Apparently, he was wrong.

“Find a way to contact Jade of SVT, my sweet dongsaeng.” 

  
  


Seungkwan is probably the _most reliable and trustworthy_ man on this planet because barely after a week, he approaches Junhui with a big grin on his face. 

“Moon Junhwi-sshi. I have something that is of your interest but I would like to have something in exchange for it.” Seungkwan speaks while his lips curl into a deviant smile.

“You are already freeloading off me. If anything, I would consider your information as a part of your instalment and call it a day.” Junhui replies sharply.

“You are no fun!” Seungkwan grumbles. “If you want to contact Kim Mingyu, you need to contact this guy.” He says as he forwards a contact to Junhui. 

“What’s his name?”

“Minghao Xu.” Seungkwan enunciates the foreign name legitimately. “He’s Jade’s manager.”

Junhui looks at the bunch of numbers screwed up together on his phone screen and contemplates. These numbers are meant to be the _end of everything_ and the _beginning of a Mingyu-less life._ If he were to find a closure then would the _evergreen longing_ diminish into _nothingness?_

Life after properly bidding his farewell to Mingyu seems dark and lonely, and maybe it was foolish to think about forever because there is an ending for everything. 

He wants to rip himself out and burn the pieces till only ash remains just so that he won’t feel the pain. Junhui does not want to feel the pain because it hurts everywhere, and he can’t take it anymore. The pain dominates his life and it's high time that he buries the Argentinian holiday for good and moves past it.

_He needs to end it._

“Do you think it's the right time to call?” Junhui finally asks to break the unbearable silence.

“I’ve been told they were in Los Angeles for the past couple of months but are back in New York now. I think it shouldn’t be too early.” It’s currently 11:36 pm in Seoul. 

Junhui’s fingers hover over the call button. _The beginning of the end._

“Are you scared?” Seungkwan asks.

Junhui is fucking scared. He looks at the younger with wet eyes hoping his expression conveys his emotions.

“Do you want me to talk?” Junhui takes a deep breath and sucks it up, willing his heart to stay calm. And then, he taps the screen and watches the calling screen load up in front of him.

Junhui nocks the arrow on the bow and grips it correctly, fixing his position.

The line rings two times until the manager picks up the phone.

“Hello?” The man’s voice is gentle and delicately sweet and it somehow suits his name, Minghao. _A Chinese name._

His fingers find the bowstring, and he prepares his draw, pulling the string back and bringing his face to the anchor point.

“Hello. Am I speaking to Mr Xu?” Junhui fumbles with his words. He feels sweat dripping down the side of his forehead while the back of his neck is on fire.

“Yes. Can I ask who is speaking?” 

Finally, he takes the aim—tries not to try—and releases the arrow.

“Junhui Wen.”

His response is followed by a long pause. Junhui thinks that each passage of a second feels like an eternity. He’s probably making a big mistake. He shouldn’t be doing this. It’s all wrong. He tries to come up with another word but stops when Minghao finally speaks. 

“Finally!” More accurately, _he screams._

The arrow hits the bullseye.

  
  


~•~

  
  


Five months later after the holiday — October 10th

Mingyu sits in the living area of his SoHo apartment and looks at the Hudson River from the large arched window, _waiting._ He’s dressed in a blue Louis Vuitton silk shirt and beige Ralph Lauren pants. Minghao had specifically ordered him to dress properly because he is supposed to meet someone important shortly. 

Mingyu definitely had a lot of words to say and tried to rationalise the situation because, for starters, Mingyu has _never_ had any formal meetings in the comfort of his house. It’s always been in some hotel or restaurant where he gets to gobble free food at the expense of the associate. Having a meeting in his own house means he would have to be courteous and serve the person himself which in simple essence is _too much work._ Minghao had simply replied that this is supposed to be a meeting related to future business opportunities that the label isn’t supposed to know of. 

As much as Mingyu wanted to avoid this meeting, Minghao had a point. Lately, Mingyu has been _hiding_ a lot of things from the label but it’s a Saturday and Mingyu wanted to rest for the weekend before his band’s album release in two weeks time. At last, rest is not _written_ in his stars for the day.

He fixes his pastel silver-lavender dyed hair and waits for his unknown visitor’s arrival, the pot of coffee already brewed if needed.

About ten minutes later, Mingyu’s doorbell rings which is followed by the front door opening. Mingyu gets up from his sofa and walks up to the foyer with a cordial smile on his face. He’s a good actor, and he can _conceal_ his discomforts for work. 

He sees Minghao walk in with a knowing smile on his face. Minghao is followed by two other men. The moment Mingyu’s eyes land on one of them, the time comes to a standstill, and he’s left _shell shocked._

Mingyu’s frail vessel that was emptied hauntingly is being filled by _fresh life._ The shrine inside his heart finally gets illuminated by the _flame of love._ The owner of the living touch that lingered all over his body finally _stands_ in front of him. 

_His heart, his moon, his destiny, his life — Junhui._

Instinctively, Mingyu’s eyes fixate on Junhui’s lips that are _created by the gods_ to be appreciated, adored and kissed on a regular basis by the _mortals._ In five months time, Junhui hasn’t changed one bit, only his hair seems to be dark brown, but other than that, Junhui still looks gloriously beautiful. The _wings_ of Mingyu’s heart flutter unceasingly, trying to rip out his chest to reach the elder man.

There are a lot of words Mingyu wants to say, but they all melt over his tongue, and he gawks at Junhui hoping, _hoping,_ desperately hoping that he is really standing in front of him and it's not some messed up illusion.

“Umm, Mingyu?” Minghao calls him with a cheeky expression. Mingyu wants to strangle him because obviously, the conniving asshole plotted the whole meetup. He could’ve at least given him a warning. “Right, I think it’s best if I leave you and Mr Wen alone for the time being. I will be at the café downstairs with Mr Boo.” 

Minghao walks closer to him and whispers in his ears.

“I hope you understand the _significance_ of this deal. Don’t mess this up.”

And with that, Minghao leaves his apartment with Mr Boo, whoever that man is supposed to be. 

The silence engulfs them as the two men stare at each other with moist eyes. Everything remains transfixed around them and Mingyu only registers the beating of his heart louder than the sirens outside. Junhui opens his mouth and makes an abrupt sound from his throat, but then he decides against it and bites his lips, cutting off any kind of thought he wanted to voice. 

If Mingyu closes his eyes, he can still recall the way Junhui’s body emitted warmth in his arms like blackbody radiation. He is suddenly reminded of the time when he _yearned_ for Junhui and was forced to be close to him but couldn’t do anything about it. Mingyu hears a chain of melody in his ears and prays to all the deities that this time, he gets to _keep_ Junhui. 

The sunbeams filtering through windows feel brighter than usual. The air around him feels less suffocating and more refreshing. In a mystical way, he feels electric sparks sizzling around them. 

The universe seems to be _celebrating_ their conclave.

Junhui shakes his head and tucks a few strands of hair behind his ear and finally looks at Mingyu with a sliver of determination. 

“Mingyu.”

It’s the _start of a song._ Mingyu still hasn’t decided if it's full of hope or despair. Nevertheless, he knows it is beautiful and rich in emotions.

Mingyu takes in a deep breath and dares to jump into the maws of the voracious animal, ravenous for his end.

“Hyung.”

“Your hair. It’s different.” Junhui comments while brushing his own hair. A single gesture from Junhui is able to bring a smile on his face. After all, Junhui is cute in his own unique way and Mingyu is in love.

“I can say the same for you.” Mingyu dares to reply cheekily, a force of habit. But apparently, he’s done something right because Junhui smiles back. It somehow brightens the colours around him and the monochrome seems to be getting replaced by a splash of colours. The change seems so _vivid._

“Are you here for business?” Mingyu asks to keep the momentum of conversation flowing. The empty silence _scares_ him. 

“Oh? No, I took some personal days. I’ve been working continuously for the past 5 months. I was kind of encouraged to do so.” Junhui replies thoughtfully. Then he takes a deep breath and looks at Mingyu with eyes that seem to hold the stars that he wants to gaze at for all of his life. 

“A part of me wishes to be courteous and polite and calmly ease into the things I came to tell you here but the other part is screaming inside my head to just spew the words out,” Junhui speaks quickly and Mingyu reminds himself that the elder man is a fast speaker.

“You don’t have to put an act around me. I believe you can just say what’s on your mind without any reserve.” Mingyu replies while placing a _heavy stone_ over his heart. His heart has been bleeding for months anyway. A little more cuts won’t really make a difference. 

“I’m not mad at you and don’t blame you for anything.”

_Huh?_ Mingyu had expected words laced with loathing directed towards him. He hadn’t been expecting exoneration. Why is Junhui here? Can Mingyu really _dare to hope_ even when Jihoon and Minghao have been suggesting him not to?

“I wish you had been honest with me from the start. I’m not sure how things would’ve turned out but I know that I would’ve tried to help you ease the pain. I know our separation was _brutal_ and I _regret_ that miserably. Mingyu, you deserve love and kindness and I took that away from you by being an immature idiot. I’m so sorry.”

_Sorry._ Junhui is apologizing. _But why?_

Mingyu tries to push down his yearning and remembers basic manners.

“Hyung? Ah, please sit down. Do you need anything? Water? Coffee? Tea? Vodka?” Mingyu offers while stuttering. Junhui who was looking at him with serious but wavering eyes loses his composure and laughs. The _melodious laughter_ that Mingyu loves fills the house he hates. 

“Why are you always so _hell-bent_ on getting me drunk?” Junhui asks incredulously, some of his inhibition stripping away.

“Well, you know, a little alcohol helps in boosting your confidence and dissipating stress. It’s good for aiding heart-to-heart conversations.” Mingyu explains. The suggestion of alcohol from an ex-drug addict isn’t the most _appropriate_ course of event but if something helps then it helps. He can’t very well offer the elder some Xanax without receiving deprecating judgement. Not that he _owns_ the pills in the first place. 

“Yeah, well it also makes you commit some regrettable choices in life. Or do I need to refresh your memory?” Junhui retorts animatedly. 

“There is not a moment that I regretted with you, hyung.” The words come easily to Mingyu because, in the crux of his heart, it is the absolute truth. _The good, the bad and the ugly,_ every single moment spent with Junhui are welcomed by Mingyu with arms wide open. The elder seems taken aback and Mingyu does not want to fool himself into thinking it could be possible but a faint shade of red colours Junhui’s cheeks. 

Mingyu is ready to _sell his soul_ at the moment if he gets to kiss Junhui in exchange for it. 

“Your opinions are biased, Mingyu-yah.” _Mingyu-yah._ Just the addition of one syllable is able to reflect so much fondness in the call of his name. His name sounds like an angel’s choir when it comes out of Junhui’s lips. 

“Yes, they are.” It’s all Mingyu can say.

Junhui’s prim posture finally slackens and Mingyu realises for the first time that Wen Junhui, the heir of a chaebol, has come to meet him in actual formal attire. The man is literally wearing a white shirt under a black suit that looks too _fine and dandy_ matched with Italian leather shoes. The only thing that gives it a casual vibe is the lack of a tie around his collar, the top two buttons undone, exposing his clavicle bone that Mingyu wants to taste. 

Mingyu shakes away his thoughts that belong in cloud-cuckoo-land. 

“I’d like a glass of water if that’s okay,” Junhui says. 

“Of course.” Mingyu starts to walk towards his kitchen. Instead of sitting on one of the sofas in the living area, Junhui follows Mingyu. Not that the younger minds it. 

Junhui quenches his thirst with the drink while Mingyu shamelessly gapes the lump on Junhui’s throat and admires the way it shifts up and down. He can’t be blamed because he _craves_ Junhui in all these different ways at different times. 

“Mingyu, I don’t want you to misinterpret anything. My decision from five months ago is still resolute.” Junhui says as he traces his finger on the edge of the glass. 

Mingyu tries not to let the hurt show on his face but it’s hard. His face falls pathetically, his fragile heart shattering into pieces. The _ache_ in his chest intensifies and Mingyu feels like _throwing up._

And it’s then when Mingyu finally realises that Junhui is not here to reconcile but to _find closure._

Junhui notices the instant change on Mingyu’s face and for a second, it feels like he tries to reach out towards the younger man. But then he thinks better of the situation and retracts his hand, clenching his fists in a vice grip. 

“Mingyu, you don’t understand how badly I want to be a romantic fool and just indulge myself in _this love_ that is so perfect like itself. If I was a better and stronger man, I would give up the world just for you.” Mingyu wants to interrupt and say that he does not need to give up anything when _he_ is willing to make that sacrifice himself. Junhui raises his palm to stop Mingyu from interrupting him.

“It’s actually quite bizarre that the feelings that I have for you– it feels like I’ve _known_ about them before the beginning of this universe. I know it makes me sound like a blind romantic but in the end, I am not an artist like you. I was raised to become a business tycoon. And as a business executive, I am forced to look at the _pros and cons_ of our situation. For starters, we live on the opposite ends of the world. And I can’t physically tolerate either of us abandoning our responsibilities for love, do you get me?”

“Hyung? Am I allowed to say anything or is that out of the question?” Mingyu interrupts him impatiently. 

Junhui’s words hurt and right now, it really feels like Mingyu is standing shirtless in front of the elder who is making a deliberate incision on his chest just so that he could rip the heart out that belongs to him and take it back because ultimately, Mingyu _still_ holds Junhui’s heart after all this time. 

Mingyu is a selfish man, and he refuses to give it back. The only heart that Junhui will walk away with is Mingyu’s _if_ the latter allows him to walk away that is.

Mingyu isn’t letting go this time. He has no fear or apprehension. _Just love._

“I know you are going to say a bunch of unrealistic things that might melt my heart and make me consider changing my mind but it’s not going to work!” Junhui counters vehemently.

“Okay, this time, I want you to calm down before we have any kind of discussion, _please._ I can’t have the repeat of that ill-fated day in Buenos Aires. I am begging you to sit down.” Mingyu points to the kitchen island bar stool and watches Junhui adversely take a seat. Mingyu follows him and sits next to him.

For a second, Mingyu hesitates to hold Junhui’s hands. He wants to hold the older man, _god knows_ he needs to, but he isn’t sure if he is allowed to hold the man. 

“You want to hold my hand.” It’s not a question but a statement. Mingyu’s frown turns upside down as he grasps the reality that Junhui is the _other half of him_ who can read him like an open book. And yes, Mingyu would very much like to remember how warm Junhui is. October is cold in New York and Junhui somehow fits him like a sweater. Mingyu needs _more and more_ of him.

“Can I?” 

Junhui glances at their hands and then gingerly reaches for Mingyu’s. 

The embers fly up from between their palms, up in the air, leaving behind _warmth and life._ This is where Mingyu’s hands have always belonged. This is the _home_ he’s always searched for.

_The intertwining of their hands feels like a homecoming._

If one were to stop and think about their whole situation, they would find it obnoxiously hysterical. Kim Mingyu only spent a week with Wen Junhui but the impact their union left behind was _inconceivable. Beyond belief._ The humans can’t envisage the fact that the instant connections they make with someone else is very rare and should be perceived as something _extraordinary._ It’s only when they are deprived of such a connection is when they realise that human life is so _fragile and limited._ Mingyu thinks their story is the greatest testament of such veracity.

“Right. Okay. Hyung? I’ll tell you a scenario and you have to picture it, can you do that for me?” Mingyu asks as he traces his thumb on the fringe of Junhui’s index finger. The latter nods.

“Hmm, your work– it must be very tiring. You must be under a lot of pressure from the higher-ups, your father, everyone around you who expects things from you, really. And amidst all this, you are also expected to showcase this unrealistically perfect image to the public. I suppose coming back home after a long day of work must be a drag and all you must crave for is some healing, _tender and lovely.”_ Mingyu summarises Junhui’s situation. The latter never spoke about it but somehow, Mingyu saw right through Junhui. It’s solely because of the bond, the love they share. 

“Now, imagine, on a _very good day,_ you come back home and find _me_ greeting you with a special smile that is only reserved for you. You find me cooking delicious dinner because believe it or not, I can cook.” Mingyu adds the last sentence with a smug grin. “Lastly, I’ll sing you to sleep and help you ease your mind off the world. Just _me and you_ in our small bubble.”

Junhui _crumbles_ in front of him. He looks terribly defeated like he’s just sustained a few fatal gunshots to his torso, the bullets dodging his vital organs, thereby divesting him off of instant death. He looks like he is forced to suffer a slow death, agonising in _pain and misery._ Even if Mingyu had somewhat anticipated Junhui’s reactions, it still hurts to see him so repulsed by it.

“Mingyu, please. Don’t be a fucking fool in love.” Junhui admonishes him with a frail voice. “You need to make practical decisions in your life.” 

“Junhwi.” The strength he gets from the two-syllable name is incomparable. It gently flows inside him and floods his body with the holy waters of devotion. “No matter what I do now, my reputation in this industry can’t be changed. It’s set in stone. I– just let me tell you what happened.”

And then, Mingyu narrates his conversation with Jihoon that took place a few months back.

  
  


_Mingyu and Jihoon have never really lived in South Korea, but they were both raised in Korean households. And every now and then, they both crave Korean cuisine. Because of their celebrity status, they usually order food at the studio, hotel rooms or houses but tonight, for some unknown reason, Jihoon has decided to take Mingyu to Koreatown in Los Angeles and treat him to some high-end Korean BBQ. Before even reaching the place, Mingyu is sceptical about Jihoon’s beacon of the offering._

_In the seclusion of their private dining arrangement, Mingyu grills the delicately curated marbled meat cuts because even when he is the younger one out of the two, Jihoon tenaciously refuses to follow the traditions. It’s just how it is, nothing that can be reversed now. They’ve come too far already and it’s easier to accept that it’s their destiny._

_“Will you just fess up why you’re being so gracious tonight?” Mingyu asks as he finishes eating his delightful grilled sea bass._

_“You know that I just want you to be happy, right?” Jihoon says as he munches his kimchi-jjigae._

_“I don’t like how you are starting with those words. I have a sense of foreboding that you have done something stupid.” Mingyu pouts, his suspicions slowly solidifying into something more concrete._

_“It’s not stupid. This new step that I’ve taken is quite essential at this point in my life.” Jihoon argues back._

_“Can you just come clean and stop speaking so mysteriously.” Mingyu practically begs in a monotonous tone while gesturing with his hands._

_“Fine!” Jihoon concedes bitterly. He takes a deep breath and then continues speaking while playing with his chopsticks. It feels like he can’t really see Mingyu in the eyes at the moment which terrifies the latter._

_“I’ve been thinking a lot recently about myself, wondering what I’m doing with my life in general and imagining how things are going to turn out eventually. During our break when I was at home, I remember how anxious I got every time my phone rang, hoping that it wasn’t a call from work. I mean for heaven’s sake, I love music and it’s my first love but this industry is evil and corrupts my feelings for the craft.”_

_Jihoon looks downtrodden and Mingyu understands because they both are sailing on the same ship._

_“We were too naive eight years ago and nobody enlightened us about the dark side of the community. I just wanted to chase this big dream of making music and having everyone in the world enjoy it and probably sing along with me. I was completely blindsided by the harsh realities of what I would be losing in the process. And, in all aspects, I have lost something or the other that I held dear to my heart. But now I’m only left with the last straw that is my love for music and I don’t want to lose that man, you feel me?”_

_Mingyu can see where this conversation is going. Even when he can see it, he does not want to accept it. Numbness is all that he can feel at the moment._

_“This December, we are meant to renew our contracts, right?”_

_Mingyu can’t believe that he’s forced to suffer another shipwreck so soon. His lover abandoned him a couple of months back and now his best friend is doing the same thing. How many times does he have to keep on swimming back to the surface until he finally gives up and drowns for good?_

_“I’m not going to sign.”_

_“What about the band?” It’s the only thing that Mingyu can ask for now. He’s blocking off his emotions again, and he knows the long-term pain that he’ll suffer by suppressing his emotions would be far greater than the short-term pain of simply acknowledging them. But once the fear takes over, it takes a Herculean effort to defeat it and Mingyu finds himself drowning deeper and deeper, hoping to find an end to this trauma._

_“I love SVT and adore all the members but I think it’s better to disband. I don’t want our band to lose its authenticity from my departure. I know I’m being selfish but I hope you understand.”_

_Recently, Mingyu has developed a new habit. Whenever he feels like things are falling apart in front of him, he whispers a name under his breath — Junhui’s name that manages to clear his heart and mind. Mingyu doesn’t believe in a lot of things, but he believes in the power of his love. And in a mystifying way, Mingyu sees the situation through Jihoon’s eyes and easily understands his turmoil._

_“So? I’m sure you’re telling me all this only because you know what you’re going to do after. Where would you go after disbandment, Ji?”_

_Jihoon looks like he’s caught in his own web but begrudgingly swallows the fact that Mingyu somehow knows him the best._

_“Seoul. Got an offer to work as a producer and songwriter at this big entertainment company. I think working by staying in the shadows is a good change of pace for me. So, I’m gonna make music for these K-pop idols and hopefully reignite my love for music.” Jihoon says._

_“Yo-you are so– I– I really don’t know what to say, Ji.”_

_“You have to understand–”_

_“No! I understand. And I hate the fact that I understand it.”_

_“Mingy–”_

_“How dare you think of abandoning me here when you fucking promised that we’ll be together forever back in high school?” Mingyu has already lost one man because he couldn’t be selfish enough. He isn’t going to let history repeat its actions._

_“Mingyu, I’m not doin–”_

_“No! The only reason I joined this band was because of you, asshole!” Mingyu blinks rapidly as he tries to rein in his anger._

_He thinks about a lot of things in the span of a few seconds. He thinks about his career, the image he will never be able to shed away in Hollywood, what his sister expects from him, what his parents wish for him. Thinks about finding happiness, the baseless flings he’s had in the past, his love for music, the way his guitar weeps with him every night and feeling alienated in his own country. He thinks about the Argentinian holiday, a friend whose smile reminds him of sunshine and the man he met from the accumulation of fates from past lives._

_It’s like his blood is pumping with adrenaline and every single second that follows moves in ultrasonic speed. Tonight, Mingyu is probably making the quickest life-changing decision in his life. It seems a bit childish but the resolution comes from a lot of lesions that have matured him years beyond his age._

_“Well, I’m not going to sign myself to the label,” Mingyu states firmly like he has been frolicking around with that decision for months. Jihoon’s lips instantly form into a grimace clearly not impressed by Mingyu’s reckless behaviour._

_“You can’t just do that, Mingyu!” Jihoon refutes his decision and pours water over the fire that had started burning inside him. But Mingyu does not know how to give up easily and stubbornly ignites the fire again._

_“I can! In fact, I’ve decided to move to South Korea as well. I’ve earned so much money that even if I were to retire now, I would still manage to live like a king until I grow old. But just like you, I love music and don’t wanna give up on it. I’ll figure out what I want to do in a few days but this is happening and you can’t run away from me! You and I are each other’s ride or die, Jihoon.” Mingyu declares fervently, a little bit of spit spraying out his mouth._

_Jihoon scrutinizes him for a long minute and then smacks his face with his hand. His hands are pretty, Mingyu notes._

_“I can’t believe I’m stuck with a manchild,” Jihoon grumbles with a heavy breath. Mingyu pretends to be hurt by bunching his brows together but nothing works on Jihoon._

_“At least think it overnight before informing Minghao about it. And if you manage to stick with your decision, don’t tell the company until the last minute otherwise they’ll do everything in their power to change your mind. And I guess we both would need to inform the other members soon.” Jihoon speaks as he resumes eating his food._

_As the tension in the air dissipates, Mingyu finally contemplates his actions. He thinks about moving to Seoul and living in a country that is meant to be his but isn’t. Junhui’s words ring loud and clear in his ears where he told the younger that even when Mingyu looked and spoke Korean, he really wasn’t a Korean and it rubbed at a very sore spot in Mingyu’s heart that has been striving to find his place in this world._

_He knows that in retrospect, people will assume he is taking this big step to move across the world just so that he can be closer to Junhui. But that’s not true at all. Maybe the other man did, in fact, influence his decision to some extent but Mingyu thinks that even if he hadn’t met Junhui and Jihoon relayed him the same thing, Mingyu would’ve somehow ended up with the same resolution._

_It’s no surprise that Mingyu hates his job, hates the people that surround him, hates the cities he lives in, hates the words attached to his persona, hates, hates, hates. All the hatred keeps on piling up on his plate and all he really needs to do is discard it now. More than doing this for someone else, he’s doing this for himself. He wants to be kind to himself and stop despising himself for his past mistakes._

_“Mingoo?” Jihoon calls him out of his self-reflection._

_“Yeah?”_

_“I understand that this would mean that you’ll be closer to Jun. I know you’ll try to shoot for the stars but just– don’t have too high hopes for whatever the outcome would be, okay?” Jihoon counsels him and Mingyu can see the concern dripping from those words. One step at a time, Mingyu reminds himself. Patiently. Kindly. Steadily._

_He nods back silently and resumes eating._

_Hope is a dangerous thing, and he knows that it can drive a man insane._

_Yet, Mingyu hopes._

  
  


“I am not sacrificing anything, hyung. Even if you cut me out of your life, I am still going to move to your country. _I love you_ but _I also love music_ and can’t jeopardize it any further by staying here. I am finally _ending_ this vicious cycle that was _created_ from my detrimental stardom. I wanted to taste the famed rockstar life when I was young but unfortunately, when I was finally able to, the taste left behind was _bitter._ I swallowed the bitter poison and it ruined me. Now, all I wanna do is detoxify myself by moving to Seoul and start afresh with Jihoon.” Mingyu finishes. 

Their hands are still clasped together, and he studies Junhui eagerly, wondering how the elder will take the news. Junhui’s face looks pensive, and he seems to be taking his sweet time in digesting the truckload of news that Mingyu has dumped on him.

Mingyu had envisioned a lot of ways this scenario could go; had practised it in front of the mirror even when he wasn’t sure if he’ll ever be able to see Junhui again (Minghao had caught him once and given him weird looks). Mingyu suddenly remembers about _chaos theory_ that was taught to him by Junhui. He really shouldn’t be expecting a _static outcome_ in a world filled with _dynamic variables._

He recalls all the things that Junhui taught him. _Fate and destiny._ A toothy smile takes over Mingyu’s lips.

Seems like Mingyu isn’t finished speaking yet. Seeing that it may very well be their last conversation, Mingyu decides to go all out today. He’s going to lay down all his cards on the table — in Junhui’s language.

“You know, I’ve been thinking that our lives are somehow _predestined,_ set in stone from the moment we take our first breath on this planet, maybe even before that.” Mingyu feels a tear run down his cheeks, the heavy words striking a chord in his heart. He notices a tear run down Junhui’s face as well and it feels like he’s looking in a mirror _._ It seems uncanny yet natural. 

“Becoming a successful musician was my destiny. Fucking up my life was, well, I guess a result of my misguided choices. And now, my impending relocation to South Korea, it was predestined as well. You see, Jihoon made the decision to move his career to a different country irrespective of our encounter. Do you know what that means? Even if we never met back in May, Jihoon would’ve ended up with the same decision. And in turn, I would’ve followed him because he is my best friend and the reason why I am what I am today. I’ve simply vowed to follow him to the _depths of hell.”_

Mingyu ends his speech exaggeratedly. As he had hoped, Junhui snickers and glares at him with wet eyes. Mingyu wants to _drown_ in them and drink away the tears. 

“Can you stop being melodramatic?” Junhui finally asks after staying silent for so long and listening to Mingyu deliver his monologues. Unfortunately for him, Mingyu still has _more_ to say.

“My point is, Junhwi, you and I are bound to always cross paths with each other. _Always.”_ Mingyu slowly leans in, bringing their intertwined hands near his mouth and pressing a kiss on Junhui’s hand. “We can both make different choices and go about our lives in whichever way we like but one way or another, we would keep walking into each other’s life again and again until we finally accept that our union is written in the stars. You can’t run away from me and neither can I from you. Instead of chasing after each other, the _universe_ chases after us to bring us together.”

Mingyu goes back to that _fateful afternoon in the street of San Telmo_ and sees the man who stands with striking confidence and lips that are meant to be kissed. He goes back to the _evening outside La Recoleta Cemetery_ and sees the man who tells Mingyu to stay with him. He goes back to the _Sunday street market_ and sees the man with Moon as his last name. Mingyu wants to be the sun in the man’s life and make him the brightest body in the sky. He goes back to the _morning in the apartment_ and sees the man whose beautiful body fits with him like a perfect glove. He goes back to the _afternoon in the ranch_ and sees the man confessing his love for Mingyu. The words still play in Mingyu’s ear and linger like the taste of sweet candy in his mouth. He goes back to the _evening in Puerto Madero_ and sees the man who accepted his demons with open arms and a doting smile. Mingyu finally goes back to the _morning in the apartment_ and sees the man who looked as devastated as him because of their abrupt and harsh separation.

Mingyu sees Junhui in all these different scenarios, both good and bad, and comes up with the same conclusion — _he loves Junhui with everything he has got and even more._

“I don’t believe in a lot of things. I am still sceptical about more than half the things in this world and can’t be bothered with them. All I can say with 100% surety is that I believe in you and I. _Us._ This is our fate and destiny and it’s _fucked up and messy._ But this is _our story._ And this is all I’ll _ever_ want to believe in.” 

Once upon a time, Mingyu used to believe that people could direct the course of love and laugh at people who used to lament their circumstances. But then Junhui came to his life, and he realised that love is not something that can be controlled by the mortals. The course can only be directed by love itself _if and only if_ it finds the two people worthy of it. 

So here Mingyu sits with Junhui, their hands joined together, and thinks that if they both are _meant to be,_ then every single creation of this world can’t separate the two. Otherwise, he’ll silently let go of Junhui and accept the end of their story graciously. Because in the end, this love of theirs is the _greatest discovery_ Mingyu’s ever stumbled upon, and he’ll keep the experience of the whole adventure close to his heart. 

Although, deep down, Mingyu knows that their love is _immeasurably powerful_ and able to move the sun and the stars.

Mingyu watches Junhui finally open his mouth to speak. He prepares himself for the worst.

“I love you.”

Junhui’s words melt and run down like a brook, singing a melody to his soul. 

Mingyu’s eyes widen as he gawks at the elder, hardly believing what those words could entail. Without thinking straight, Mingyu pulls Junhui by their connected hands and takes the man in his embrace. 

Mingyu feels like he’s been tempered like chocolate with this hug. He melts under the _softness_ of Junhui and his overheated body and racing heart cools down and stabilises into smooth perfection. In a single flash, he sees _laughter and weeping_ combine to form a _sacred bond_ that will live on even after his end. 

He finally understands the _ache of too much tenderness_ in the arms of the man whose love seems to mend his broken world.

The creation of brick and mortar could never give him a home but the existence of a single man has finally led him to his destined home. 

_Mingyu’s home._

“Do you really mean it? Are you still going to stand firm on your decision?” Mingyu asks weakly while pressing his face into the side of Junhui’s neck, refusing to let go of this warmth so easily. Though, Junhui pulls back and cups Mingyu’s cheeks with his warm hands. Mingyu smiles because this is how they are meant to be. 

Being this close to Junhui after so long, Mingyu can’t help but admire the face that has haunted him for the past five months. His face that is painted in golden hues _radiates_ so brightly. A part of Mingyu’s soul says that it radiates _because of him._

_The lonely moon finally found his destined sun._

“Who will love you if it’s not me, baby?” The fruitiness that Mingyu resonates with Junhui’s voice is back. For now, that is more than enough. “When I said forever, I always meant it.” Junhui declares with a smile on his face.

And Mingyu falls all over again for the man with the lips that are meant to be kissed. 

His eyes fall on Junhui’s perfect face that is speckled with bewitching moles, and he’s filled with reverence for the other man. His urges to touch, feel and taste escalate dramatically and without any inhibition, he acts on it.

He starts kissing his way over Junhui’s face by pressing a kiss on the forehead, trying to convey his devotion in the act. He moves down and maps the tall nose and hears Junhui whimper letting out that symphonic sound. His lips trace every single mole on Junhui’s face in an arcane pattern, seemingly getting lost in the way. Mingyu drinks everything that Junhui gives and gets _drunk off him._

“I think you should kiss me now.” _Déjà vu._

Mingyu jerks back and looks at Junhui to make sure he didn’t hear the words in his head and the other man _actually_ vocalised it. He sees a serene smile on Junhui’s face, his face colouring into a pretty pink. Mingyu wants to breathe in Junhui and let the man be his air.

“Can I really kiss you?” Mingyu asks, his voice wavering with disbelief because everything seems too good to be true now.

“When I said I love you, I meant I _want you back_ in my life. Possibly forever this time.” Junhui says with an amused lilt in his voice.

Mingyu absorbs the words and then, in a very inexplicable and unbelievable way, he hears the whole world cheering for their love. _Claps, whistles, shouts._ The world is rejoicing with their union.

Without another thought, he crushes their lips together and feels the metaphorical _firework_ going off behind him. Their lips are chapped from neglecting to take care of themselves because of their misery but the kiss is soft and melts Mingyu’s heart as it _always_ has. The kisses turn from innocent to feral in seconds. Their teeth clack against each other as they both run their hands ravenously over each other’s body, trying to feel the other’s body heat. Junhui tries to clamber over Mingyu’s lap but the latter’s body shakes with too much excitement and a single wrong step on Mingyu’s part has them both falling on the floor the very next second. 

“Ow! For someone who could pick me up so effortlessly in the past, you sure as hell can’t handle me anymore!” Junhui comments as he rubs his head to relieve the pain while Mingyu rubs his hips to do the same.

“Hyung!” Mingyu whines. “I can’t control my happiness.”

“I am your happiness?”

“You are. My happiness and my sadness.” Mingyu replies easily. Junhui starts laughing and Mingyu follows his suit naturally. The elder buries his face in Mingyu’s neck and inhales deeply.

“You smell different.” He mumbles into Mingyu’s neck, leaving close-mouthed kisses on his skin.

“So do you.” Mingyu can’t smell the reminiscent scent of honey, musk and patchouli anymore. He breathes in _yuzu, lotus and vetiver._ It feels woody and grounding. Junhui smells like _home_ and Mingyu loves the _change._

“Change is the only permanent thing,” Junhui repeats the words from the past that had touched Mingyu.

“Is it safe to assume that I have you back in my life?” Mingyu asks nervously.

“As long as you promise to love me–”

“I do!”

“—and not lie to me ever again, then I am yours forever.” Junhui finishes as he tries to get up but Mingyu pulls him back and flips their position, pinning him down to the ground. 

“I promise to love you with a _love greater than love_ and never lie to you again.” Mingyu delivers his words with absolute conviction, his voice steady and unwavering. Junhui smiles and wraps his fingers around Mingyu’s neck, pulling him down roughly.

“Then you are mine.” Junhui sounds territorial and there is a _glint_ in his eyes. And this is where Mingyu is assured that his _lover is back._ He feels the magnetic pull and without exchanging another word, they close the distance between their lips and drown in each other.

Mingyu abruptly detaches his lips and looks at Junhui suspiciously, “Hyung, I love you and everything but when are you flying back?” He asks.

“Tonight.”

“What? _No!_ We just got together!”

“Well, technically I didn’t come here with the intention to resolve our relationship.” Junhui simply shrugs back.

“Postpone your flight for me, please hyung?” Mingyu begs with pouty lips and droopy eyes. Junhui pats his cheeks affectionately.

“Hyung’s got work to do, baby!” Junhui coos.

“Ah! Why are you like this?” Mingyu slaps Junhui’s hands on his cheeks lightly, not really _used to_ being talked like this. It’s kind of embarrassing but Mingyu would be lying if he said he doesn’t secretly love it. 

“And who is _Mr Boo?”_ Mingyu asks as he glares at the elder clearly not happy that Junhui will leave him so soon. He just got the elder back in his life for crying out loud.

“Oh? That is my dearest dongsaeng Seungkwan! The one who exposed all your lies!” Junhui comments cheekily. 

“He’s the _homewrecker?”_ Mingyu raises his voice in agitation.

“Hey! Don’t you dare harm him in any way,” Junhui warns in a low voice. Mingyu decides to drop the topic like its hot plate, resentfully.

“Hyung! I missed you.” Mingyu says instead as he tightens his arms around Junhui and basks in the warmth he’s missed for so long.

They fall back to their old ways so _easily. Naturally. Comfortably._ As if they have belonged to each other before they even knew each other.

“I think our relationship burnt down so fast because everything happened so rapidly. Like we did everything too quickly. We moved _faster than a Bugatti Chiron,_ baby! So I suggest we should take things slow this time. Let things happen on its own.” Junhui suggests as he strokes Mingyu's arms.

_“Slow.”_ Mingyu tests the word on his lips.

_“Slow,”_ Junhui repeats them. “Like I know it’s going to be difficult seeing how we both are too impulsive–”

“Hot-headed–” Mingyu lists as well.

“—stubborn–”

“—irrational–”

“—impatient.”

“I love how we are talking about taking things slowly, but we are already in the phase of our relationship where we slander each other.” Mingyu comments after breaking the chain of insults. 

“I guess our love story was never meant to follow the norm. After all, it transcends the _confinements of time and space.”_ Junhui quips mischievously. Mingyu smirks back. 

“Hyung? Are you really not mad at me anymore?” Mingyu asks one last time because it all seems too simple when it actually wasn’t, to begin with.

The change in Junhui’s expression is slow as his face becomes inscrutable.

“I don’t really know how I feel about it anymore. The thing is that in all these five months, I didn’t suffer alone. It’s clear that you were a mess as well and more than anything, I am just _glad_ that you didn’t relapse. All I know is that _I love you_ and _I need you._ That’s a powerful enough reason for me to let go of my grudges. Let’s resolve our issues one at a time, okay?” Junhui admits with a sober voice and the seriousness behind those words crawls up Mingyu’s chest like a snake, waiting to poison him at any given moment in the future. 

But for now, he’s been forgiven graciously, and he’ll take whatever he can get. 

They both finally manage to get up and Junhui finally takes the offer of a cup of tea.

Junhui will once again leave him tonight. But this time, their separation has a _timer_ on it, and he can’t be more grateful about it. Mingyu survived 5 months without being aware of Junhui’s life. He thinks he can survive another 2-3 months with the reassurance that Junhui is his and only one call away. He is so happy because now he _knows_ that he has Junhui in his life again.

Yet, Mingyu _thirsts_ for more of Junhui.

Even after he knows that he holds Junhui’s heart and the latter holds his, the longing remains evergreen in his heart for the other man.

“Hyung?”

“Yes?”

“I was hoping–” Mingyu can’t finish the sentence. He looks down at his shoes and tries to come up with decent words to express his wishes to Junhui. The latter catches on fast.

“You want to fuck.” Again, instead of questioning, Junhui states the fact. 

“I love how you can read what’s on my mind. See? We are _destined_ to be with each other.” Mingyu rambles instead, trying to distract Junhui from his reddening ears.

“Seungkwan and Minghao are waiting for us in the café downstairs,” Junhui argues.

“It’s a good café! They can stay there for longer! Their coffee is absolutely delicious. Come on, after tonight, I won’t be seeing you until _next year!”_ Mingyu groans petulantly.

“Seungkwan does love coffee,” Junhui speaks thoughtfully while stroking his fingers on his lips. The rose-tinted lips that look delectable and juicy. He’s a bloody tease and _he knows it._

“See? Problem solved!” Mingyu starts to slowly make his way towards Junhui.

“Okay but we gotta make it quick.” Junhui negotiates while he carefully places his cup of tea on the table.

“I need at least an hour.” 

_“An hour?”_ Junhui screeches incredulously.

“Three months, Junhwi! Let me worship you leisurely.” That does it for Junhui as he loses his cool and looks completely taken by Mingyu’s words. He fumbles with some words as he knits his eyebrows in perturbation.

“Yo-you can’t just say that.” Junhui seethes weakly. 

Mingyu tugs Junhui closer to him and in one swift motion, picks him up. Junhui locks his arms and legs around Mingyu naturally, a dance which they seem to have performed a million times, as the younger carries him wordlessly to his bedroom. Once inside, Mingyu gently drops Junhui on his bed and runs to fetch the supplies. 

“How many people have you slept with on this bed?” Junhui asks coldly as he gets up from the bed and removes his coat, placing it carefully behind the plush chair beside the window. 

“Zero. You are the first one.” Mingyu replies honestly.

“Liar!” Junhui retorts as he makes his way back to the bed. 

“Hyung, I barely live in this apartment. Trust me.” Mingyu says as he climbs on the bed and crawls towards the elder who sits against the headboard.

“Why should I?” Junhui asks with narrow eyes. 

Mingyu hates this house but loves his bedroom for the natural light that comes in from the large arched windows. The sun filters in through the white tissue curtains and falls exuberantly over Junhui’s face and body. He looks like a _celestial being_ who is too pretty for his own good. Junhui looks soft like this, the light and shadow highlighting his features divinely. Junhui looks at him with such _tender eyes_ and _brilliant smile,_ an expression only reserved for him. 

Mingyu sees everything in bright colours, and he sees himself through Junhui’s eyes. The latter loves him unconditionally which essentially concludes to the fact that Mingyu is a man _capable_ of being loved. He knows that he isn’t perfect and has a dark side that is utterly despicable, but he also has redeeming qualities in him — _the goodness that completes him along with his darkness._ Mingyu has been lost for so long but it's safe to say that he has finally found himself, and he accepts himself. Life has an all-new meaning for him and in this supremely introspective moment, Mingyu realises for the first time that _he finally loves himself._ Just as much as he loves Junhui. And it’s one of the _greatest epiphanies_ of his life that seems to shake Mingyu’s senses for a little while.

Mingyu stares into space for probably too long because Junhui looks at him with a worried face and Mingyu knows that he doesn’t deserve the man, but he is selfish and will take him anyway. 

Mingyu comes back to his lover and leans closer until their foreheads touch.

“I love you.” _Saranghae._

Junhui raises his hands and cards his fingers through Mingyu’s hair, breathing in slowly and steadily. And then, he speaks in English.

“I love you.” _I love you._

Mingyu wants to convey his words in Junhui’s mother tongue to make it more special. An ode to the lovely afternoon in Mendoza.

“I love you.” _Wǒ ài nǐ._

Junhui giggles and presses a small kiss over Mingyu’s lips. _Sweet and moist._

“I love you.” _Te quiero._

The elder finishes their song and kisses Mingyu, poking his tongue over the seam of Mingyu’s lips _firmly_ while _gently_ stroking the mole over his left cheek.

Mingyu opens up and lets himself be filled by Junhui.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey! if you have managed to come this far, then thank you. i understand that reading this story not only takes up a lot of time but makes the reader invest in a lot of emotions as well. when i started writing this fic, i didn't anticipate that it would turn out this big (my estimated wc for this was somewhere between 60k-70k). i am thankful to each and everyone of you who clicked kudos, left beautiful comments or even just read it. it all matters to me and thank you!
> 
> [if i](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7xpka2BAhOw&ab_channel=SEVENTEEN-Topic)
> 
> i'll see you all in the last chapter. until then, please let me know if you liked the story by leaving kudos and comments. i love you.  
> [twitter](https://twitter.com/redsyub) | [curiouscat](https://curiouscat.me/redsyub)


	10. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i know this is too long for an epilogue but i hope you enjoy it ♥

Six months later after the reconciliation — April 6th

_ Warmth. _

It’s the first thing Mingyu registers as he is woken up from his peaceful slumber by warm kisses on his nose, cheeks and forehead. He naturally reaches for the bundle of warmth laying beside him and pulls him in. Junhui groans from being crushed by Mingyu’s limbs and hits his arms weakly. Mingyu simply buries his nose further into Junhui’s neck and feels the veins on the elder's neck throbbing and pulsating with life.  _ Hot. _ It’s blazing hot.

“Happy birthday, my sweet love.” Junhui’s sleep voice drizzles in the form of petals over Mingyu’s soul. 

“How many times are you going to wish me, hyung?” Mingyu asks because Junhui already made sure to wish Mingyu at midnight by giving the younger what he always wants.  _ Junhui’s love. _ Most tenderly and intimately possible. Just the two of them.  _ Mingyu. Junhui. _

“Well,” Junhui replies thoughtfully. “I haven’t decided yet.” 

A year ago, Mingyu would’ve never imagined that he would be waking up on his 24th birthday in a luxurious apartment in Cheongdam-dong, wrapped comfortably in the arms of the  _ light of his life. _ His heart, his moon, his destiny and his life.  _ Moon Junhwi.  _

But life is unpredictable and disorderly coincidences  _ shape up _ human life. The almighty fate dictates the path and liberty of free choice is nothing but an illusion. It’s a deep outlook that can’t be comprehended without truly going through the  _ unreal experience _ that Mingyu and Junhui did. They fell in love with each other with a  _ love _ that is as perfect as itself. 

And Mingyu finally feels  _ alive and right. _

He moved to South Korea after signing all the necessary documents and filing in his tax returns in mid-December. To Jihoon’s great miseries, Mingyu got a job as a music producer in the same company as him,  _ Aquarii Entertainment, _ and the latter has been zealously chasing his love for music again without stepping out into the limelight. He still does get stopped in the middle of the street by fans of  _ SVT’s Jade _ but the  _ pressure _ to play the part in the grand play is off and life has become significantly  _ easier. _

His life is very  _ slow-paced _ now and sometimes Mingyu does feel the need to scuttle back to his castle and take back the throne, just to chase the adrenaline and rush he got with the fame. But then he reminds himself that behind that glamorous life, the  _ monsters _ lurk in the shadows waiting to lure him into the dark and desolate life of  _ unhappiness and destruction. _ He reminds himself that his life might be moving at a more relaxed pace now, something he’s not used to, but he has his love for music and loved ones to care. And if life will allow it, he’s going to die old and surrounded by people who genuinely love him. 

He’ll be remembered as a  _ good man _ by the people in their good memories. And that’s all that matters in the end.

Mingyu supposedly has a shared apartment with Jihoon in the very same building where Junhui lives, but he rarely ever graces his presence in the house he pays for. Although in retrospect, Mingyu considers Junhui his  _ home _ and wherever the elder lives will be his abode. So Mingyu happily lives his  _ domestic life _ with Junhui in his penthouse at the top of the building. Now Mingyu might be scared of heights but small sacrifices have to always be made  _ in the name of love. _

Before Mingyu came to Seoul, Junhui used to live with Seungkwan but the former asked the youngest to move out so that he could preserve his sanctity.

_ “You don’t want to know about our insatiable sex-drive, Seungkwan-ah. It’s for the best.” _

That was all Junhui needed to say for Seungkwan to pack up his stuff and move out. Although, he sometimes does sleepover and this is how Mingyu has developed a  _ budding friendship _ with Seungkwan. Which by all means was a  _ big mistake. _ If Mingyu thinks Junhui can sometimes be a menace, Seungkwan is a  _ walking threat _ all the time. The moment he became comfortable around Mingyu, he made it his life mission to argue with the latter over trivial things. Mingyu likes to believe that Seungkwan is his frenemy. Junhui simply shrugs off their unbalanced dynamics, not even the least bit interested in the tomfoolery or growing rivalry.

Mingyu shifts away from Junhui to grab his phone from the nightstand and checks the time. It takes him a second to realise that 6:23 am is too damn  _ early. _

“Hyung! Why are you up so early?” Mingyu grumbles as he covers himself with the comforter. Tries to anyway because Junhui pulls it back and looks at him with his signature mischievous glint in his eyes. Once upon a time, those eyes used to make Mingyu nervous because Junhui was an unpredictable being who always liked to flip the situation around in his favour. Now, Mingyu would  _ like to believe _ and say that he has somewhat familiarised himself to Wen Junhui’s antics but deep down he knows he is just  _ fooling himself. _ Still, at the end of it all, his pranks are endearing and Mingyu is a fool in love, who is consumed by  _ Junhui’s essence, _ his veins pumping blood in the name of the elder man. 

“Good question! But,” Junhui prolongs the vowel. “It’s meant to be a surprise. You have around 30 minutes to get ready. We need to leave the house by 7 am sharp. Alright? Now move!” Junhui spanks Mingyu’s ass to push the younger man off the bed. The latter does not even get to utter a single word in defiance or bewilderment as he watches Junhui saunter out of the room.

Mingyu takes a deep breath and mentally  _ prepares _ himself for the unknown. 

  
  


They don’t talk to each other during the car ride but the atmosphere isn’t unpleasant. Mingyu gets some extra sleep while Junhui attends to some business calls as they are driven towards Incheon in Junhui’s luxury sedan by his designated driver. For a moment, Mingyu mentally questions whether Junhui’s surprise could be a getaway to a foreign land or something but the elder man,  _ the other half of him, _ reads his mind and brushes off the idea by saying he isn’t that reckless. Mingyu looks at him suspiciously because they both know Junhui can be pretty reckless if he lets his emotions get the best of him. 

After an hour-long drive, Junhui gently wakes Mingyu up and the latter opens his eyes to the wide  _ blue ocean _ and hundreds of small  _ boats and yachts _ docked at the marina. 

“Where are we?” Mingyu asks out of astonishment. 

“Surprise! We are at Wangsan Marina. Now come on! Others are waiting for us.” Junhui ushers Mingyu out of the car and pulls him hurriedly down the dock. 

_ “Others?” _ Instead of answering, Junhui just returns a bright grin and Mingyu lets himself be pulled by the other man in  _ blissful wonder _ because he’s genuinely thrilled about what’s in store for him and is looking forward to it. 

Junhui finally comes to a halt in front of a huge yacht. Mingyu reads  _ ‘Unmyeong’ _ embellished on the bow and stares in sheer amazement.  _ Destiny. _

“You bought me a  _ yacht?” _ His voice squeaks by the end. Junhui’s lovely grin dissolves into a blank face. 

“Ah, no. It’s  _ my _ yacht.” Junhui replies. “But if you want a yacht then it can be arranged, Mingyu-yah. I was under the impression that I’m your  _ boyfriend, _ not your  _ sugar daddy _ but I guess, I need to re-evaluate our relationship.” Junhui comments wistfully. 

“Hyung! Shut up!” Mingyu wails in mortification. “At least be a little nicer to me on my birthday.” He whines with a pout on his lips. 

“I’m a slave for you, my love. Whatever you wish today will be my command.” Junhui replies cheekily. Mingyu hits his shoulder in retaliation while hiding his face with the other hand. 

They climb up the yacht and walk inside the cabin. Mingyu is left flabbergasted as he sees the people waiting for them. Particularly, a  _ single person. _

“Happy birthday!” The presence of Jihoon and Seungkwan is expected, something that isn’t too surprising as they all live in the same city, the former living in the same building even. But then he sees the person with a sharp nose and jaw whose face  _ glows _ with a bright smile and Mingyu can only gawk at him with wet eyes, his clouded mind unable to form words. 

“Does he usually cry when people give him birthday wishes?” Seokmin asks Jihoon with curious eyes. The latter shrugs with an unimpressed look on his face. Junhui rubs Mingyu’s back and the younger looks at him, silently asking if he was behind all this. The other man returns a fond smile and Mingyu’s eyes fall on the two moles over Junhui’s lips. Mingyu loves Junhui as a  _ whole, _ all the good and bad combined, but his eyes and his heart will always have a soft spot for the lips that are  _ meant to be kissed. _ He finds himself falling in love  _ all over again. _

Mingyu takes a deep breath and walks towards the three men, surrounding himself by the men who, despite knowing about every transgression committed by him, see the  _ good _ in him. Thousands of emotions come to him in waves as he gets engulfed by the  _ compassion and amity _ emitted by people around him.

“How the fuck are you here?” Mingyu asks Seokmin after giving him a tight hug.

“Mingyu, I’ll be back in a few minutes. In the meantime, you can catch up with our old friend here.” Junhui says as he places his hand over Seokmin’s shoulder and gives it a warm squeeze. He excuses himself with a polite smile and Mingyu watches him leave the cabin.

“Well, your life has certainly taken a turn for the  _ better, _ huh?” Seokmin says with a raised eyebrow.

“You can say that,” Mingyu replies with a smirk on his face. 

It’s not that Mingyu and Seokmin haven’t been in touch for the past 10 months. With the aid of technology and social media, they have managed to become the best _ buddies _ but there is something so poignant about seeing the man in the flesh,  _ solid and real. _ Seokmin was there for Mingyu when the latter lost all sense of direction and just wanted to drown in his melancholy. Seokmin tended to his emotional wounds and patched him up with  _ love and care.  _ Mingyu could see the goodness in the world and dare to hope again with the help of Seokmin’s encouragement.

“Now would you tell me how you came here from Buenos Aires?” Mingyu asks impatiently as all the men walk out of the cabin and climb the stairs to reach the upper deck. The ocean and the skies are blue and clear and the breeze is pleasant and crisp. Even nature seems to be  _ celebrating _ Mingyu’s birthday with jovial spirits.

“Well, it’s a funny story.” Seokmin starts while looking off into the distance. He probably wants to look cool and composed, seeing as Jihoon is curiously looking at him as well. And Mingyu remembers that Seokmin is  _ Woozi’s biggest fan. _ But for all his demure and composed act, Seokmin is essentially a simpleton. An adorably sweet,  _ simpleton. _

“You see, as usual, I was attending to my bartender duties at the microbrewery, just witnessing inebriated people creating a ruckus and minding my own business. And then  _ suddenly, _ this very suspicious man dressed in a black suit  _ walks _ up to the bar and asks if my name is Seokmin in  _ English. _ You know very well that I can’t speak English, so I did the only sensible thing that came to my mind at the moment and  _ ignored _ the man.” Seokmin narrates in a serious tone making sure to emphasise his words with dramatical gestures. 

Why is he a bartender again? He should be a theatre actor in Mingyu’s opinion.

“But this man was, how should I put it, really  _ persistent. _ After a while, he started speaking in Korean and  _ oh, _ I thought that is my language and I should probably assist my fellow countryman, you know? So, he goes on to say that he is going to make an offer to me that I can’t refuse. And I’m like yes, I finally am going to live my  _ godfather film dreams.” _ Seokmin continues.

“Wow. I finally found someone who could be more ludicrous than Jun hyung.” Seungkwan comments from the side. Jihoon silently snickers. Seokmin doesn’t get deterred by them and resumes speaking.

“He asked if I would like to get a first-class ticket to Seoul, all expenses for travel and accommodation paid fully by his sponsor. I had been planning to visit my grandparents for a while anyway but I’m not made of money. So this offer felt like a  _ gift from the angels _ and I accepted it right there.” Seokmin finishes with a big grin on his face.

“You didn’t even think of checking the authenticity of the man?” Jihoon asks sharply.

“Ah no? Anyway, what was I saying? Oh, yeah! After the best flight of my life, I was escorted by a few men to this big ass building in a big ass car and then I was finally greeted by Junhwi hyung. So it all turned out for the best! Why are you all so cynical?” Seokmin asks the last question weakly.

“Wow! This man is so pure and naive. I don’t know how he has managed to survive for so long without getting swindled by a conniving person.” Seungkwan comments in mild horror.

Seokmin looks at Seungkwan with  _ unease _ starting to bloom over the features of his handsome face. Mingyu wants to reach out and appease his mood and tell him that he’s a good human and that’s all that matters. But Jihoon beats him to it by sensing Seokmin’s mood as well and changing the subject.

“I was told that this boat will sail in the sea. But it is still docked. I’m starting to believe that Junnie hired this yacht and couldn’t  _ afford _ the sailing fees.” Jihoon comments cheekily. 

“Are you slandering Junhwi hyung in front of me?” Seungkwan looks at Jihoon with furrowed brows.

“Do you have a problem?” Jihoon asks with raised eyebrows. Seungkwan snickers in return, a fond expression settling on his face.

“Nah, knock yourself out. Maybe you and I should hang out more often.”

“Eh! No, thank you. I don’t associate myself with rich brats.” Jihoon tosses back with a shrug.

_ “Rich brat? _ I will let you know that I–” Whatever retort was on the tip of Seungkwan’s tongue gets dissolved into nothingness as he looks with wide eyes behind Mingyu. The latter thinks of following Seungkwan’s line of sight and turns to find Junhui approaching their party with a very special guest. 

_ Xu Minghao. _

“No way,” Mingyu whispers in disbelief. 

One of the  _ hardest _ things that Mingyu had to do when he decided to leave behind his American dream was saying goodbye to Minghao, his manager, friend and life support. Mingyu doesn’t like to admit, but he cried  _ like a baby _ as he hugged Minghao for the last time before getting on the airplane bound for Seoul. Their separation was harsh, he might arguably say,  _ harsher _ than his separation from Junhui back in Argentina. 

It all had to do with Minghao’s wish to cut ties with Mingyu. In his defence, he wanted to start afresh without having to invest half of his brain in the happenings of Mingyu’s life which seemed fair. Minghao had lost countless nights of sleep because of Mingyu, and he understood where the other man was coming from. Yet it  _ hurt _ to accept the reality that Mingyu couldn’t even have Minghao in his life as a friend. 

Mingyu resentfully accepted Minghao’s set of conditions because he believes that he has to make certain sacrifices of  _ great consequences _ to compensate for all his past misdeeds. 

But now, as he dumbfoundedly watches Minghao approaching him, all he wants to do is  _ hate _ the man. At the same time, he wants to  _ love _ the man and thank him for letting go of his earlier reticence to celebrate Mingyu’s birthday.

“Hello. Happy birthday!” Minghao greets in Korean, a small, polite smile on his face.

Mingyu throws the basic etiquettes overboard and tackles Minghao into a tight hug.

“Oh, man! Could you please be a little less excited to see me?” Minghao mumbles into Mingyu’s shoulder. 

“How?” That’s all Mingyu can manage to ask after he leans back to look at Minghao’s youthful face. He looks better than he did before, clearly a result of having a good rest in the past few months. 

“Mr Wen here made me an offer that I couldn’t refuse,” Minghao replies curtly.

“What is with you making  _ obscure deals _ to lure people out here?” Seungkwan looks at Junhui with a critical glare.

“It is Mingyu’s birthday.” Junhui, being the simple-minded man he is, replies with a straightforward reply that explains  _ nothing _ but at the same time explains  _ everything _ with the unsaid words that float below. 

A long time back, in the  _ hour of the waltz _ between two trembling beings, Junhui had  _ declared _ with a love that transcended time and space that he would move the mountains and split the ocean to make his beloved Mingyu beam with happiness.

Junhui is an honest man who never makes empty-handed promises.

“Did he also offer you a travel ticket and accommodation?” Jihoon asks Minghao.

“Ah, he did but that was not really the offer I was talking about. It’s a bit,” Minghao pauses to look at Junhui. By the time Mingyu turns his head towards the two men so that he can figure out their unspoken conversation, it’s too late. “Complicated.” Minghao finishes.

Mingyu witnesses members of the boat crew casting off the lines and pulling in the fenders. The yacht starts to drift away from the dock, and then he hears the sound of propellers spinning. The yacht finally departs the marina at idle speed.

“Oh? Looks like Junnie was able to pay for sailing after all.” Jihoon comments insouciantly which earns him a punch to his arm by Mingyu.

As the yacht starts to sail away into the big, blue waters, Jihoon along with Minghao go inside the cabin to find some breakfast while Seokmin and Seungkwan walk away towards the starboard side and acquaint themselves with each other. Junhui and Mingyu stand against the railing silently, admiring the waves lashing the tranquil water and enjoying the salty breeze.

“Are you going to keep the offer you made with Minghao a secret from me, hyung?” Mingyu asks, his curiosity getting the better of him. Junhui giggles in return, his bright, toothy smile pulling Mingyu’s heartstrings.

“Not really,” Junhui says as he looks into Mingyu’s eyes. The latter sees the  _ night sky _ painted in the other man’s eyes. “I just don’t want you to think that what I did, I did it for your sake. Well, you probably might have played a  _ minor _ part in my decision but all in all, I did it more for myself.”

From the start of their relationship, Mingyu knew that Junhui was a practical man, making all his decisions after weighing in all the odds against him like a true executive. Sometimes, it feels more like a  _ fault _ in the other man’s character but Mingyu has come to accept the elder because, in the end,  _ no one _ is meant to be perfect. At least a  _ perfect partner in a relationship _ in their case.

Mingyu has been hurt in the past when Junhui gave his work precedence over him, like choosing to cancel their plans or spend Christmas in a foreign land. But his anguish was quickly turned to elation because Junhui knows how to  _ make up _ for his shortcomings. Junhui makes sure to come up with more extravagant plans that take Mingyu’s breath away. For new years, Junhui flew them to Seattle just so that they could welcome the new year with Mingyu’s family, essentially also granting his  _ family’s wish _ to spend a holiday together as a complete  _ Kim household.  _

It's always the little things that accumulate into something colossal that moves the  _ soul. _

“Alright. I won’t think that whatever you did, you did it for me.” Mingyu acknowledges.

“Good.” Junhui sounds pleased. “Well, I have been trying to find a reliable personal assistant for quite a while. The end goal is to get a dependable estate manager in 3-4 years. You know how this corporate industry is, I can  _ barely _ trust more than half of my employees. And I can’t keep track of all my assets and manage to balance work all by myself. The recruitment department has been sending me prospective personnel but I don’t seem to click with anyone. Now Minghao here seems like the  _ perfect candidate. _ The man is resourceful, efficient, competent and dedicated. Plus we both can communicate in Mandarin in front of clients and hence be discreet about sensitive information.” Junhui practically sings a song in Minghao’s praise. 

“So you’ve hired him just like that?” Mingyu asks, trying to put one and one together.

“No, don’t be ridiculous.” Junhui admonishes him in a hushed tone, careful to keep their conversation away from Seungkwan and Seokmin’s ears. “I contacted him a couple of months back and asked if he was employed. When I got a negative response, I asked him in my most courteous tone to apply to my company as I would love to have the man on my team. He eventually agreed and went through a proper and rigorous recruitment process. But as I mentioned earlier, the man is very competent. He cleared all the stages and now holds the offer letter to work as my personal assistant.” Junhui explains evocatively.

Mingyu can’t believe what he’s hearing. For a second, he thinks that maybe this is all a dream, and he needs to wake up. But as he pinches his own arm, the pain inflicted by it feels  _ very real _ which leads him to the conclusion that yes,  _ his ex-manager _ is somehow going to become his  _ boyfriend’s personal assistant. _ And through some divine magic, he gets to have Minghao back in his life. Maybe Mingyu should follow his newfound spiritual belief and consider the truth that he and Minghao are  _ destined _ to be a part of each other’s lives as well. 

Mingyu isn’t particularly mad about Junhui’s selfish choices this time around. In fact, he thinks there couldn’t have been a more  _ perfect solution _ to a big quandary in his life. 

Mingyu has somehow  _ found a purpose _ to have Minghao back in his life. 

Mingyu  _ keeps finding reasons _ to be content with his life through Junhui. 

Mingyu  _ needs _ Junhui to stay by his side forever.

“When does he start?” Mingyu asks eagerly.

“When he becomes fluent in Korean. He’s been getting special, personalised training, so I hope in the next 3-4 months, he’ll be comfortable enough to hold a conversation in Korean. Learning a new language is a continuous process anyway, and he’ll have to go miles before he has full command over the language.” Junhui vocalises his opinion.

“Wise words from a man who is trilingual, I guess.” Mingyu quips.

They’ve probably spent a lot of time talking about other people in Mingyu’s opinion and now all he wants to do is spend quality time with his lover. After all, it’s  _ his birthday. _

“Why are we out here so early?” Mingyu asks as he places his hands on Junhui’s waist and pulls him closer, breathing in yuzu, lotus and vetiver.  _ Grounding. Warm. Home. _

“Because we are going to a private island to enjoy your birthday brunch and it’s a two-hour ride,” Junhui replies.

“You really outdid yourself, hyung. I feel like whatever I do now for your birthday won’t ever compare to all this.” Mingyu makes a grand gesture with his hands. Junhui leans in and leaves a tender kiss on Mingyu’s cheeks.  _ Butterflies _ emerge from the spot and fly away, chasing the rising sun behind them.

“It’s not a competition, Mingyu-yah.” Junhui censures him playfully. He takes a deep breath and leans his head on Mingyu’s shoulder. “I couldn’t really think of a good tangible gift to give you, so I thought having you reunite with your old friends would be more thoughtful. I did think of inviting your other ex-bandmates as well but Jihoon-ah said you weren’t very close with them and it was more of a professional relationship.” Junhui confesses. 

Mingyu reflects his relationship with his ex-bandmates. When their band was newly formed, they were all very close friends and a  _ tightly-knit group. _ But as they were bestowed with fame upon them, their relationship gradually became  _ estranged _ and by the end, they were all together for music, choosing to find closer friendship outside the band. Except for Mingyu and Jihoon, of course. 

“This is the best gift I’ve ever got in all my 24 years of life, Junhwi. Thank you. I don’t really deserve you.” Mingyu expresses his gratitude while deriding himself. 

Junhui wraps his arms around Mingyu’s waist and turns to kiss his shoulders in reverence. He doesn’t speak for a few minutes, and they let comfortable silence wrap around them, lulling them to  _ blissful disposition. _ Mingyu loses himself to the sounds of waves rumbling around them. 

“You’re a good man,” Junhui states unexpectedly. “Take the things that hurt you as a blessing. Mingyu, you’re the  _ strongest man _ I’ve ever encountered in my life. You wanna know why? Because it takes a consequential amount of courage to face your own soul and be conscious of the darkness within. People spend all their lives trying to avoid their immoral creed and act like they are all virtuous and faultless but you, my love, you  _ choose _ to wake up every morning, accept your past sinful choices and decide to be a better man than yesterday, thanking the universe for granting you a second chance. Trust me, you  _ deserve _ everything good the world has to offer and it’s not a biased opinion.” 

Mingyu should be pretty safe and dry as he is standing on the upper deck of the yacht, yet he finds himself  _ drowning comfortably _ in the words Junhui drips from his lips. He is aware that the elder can be so understanding and wise at times but it still manages to take him by surprise  _ every single time.  _

He wants to say a lot of things in return, tell Junhui he loves him more than mere mortal words can describe but at the moment, only tears spill down his eyes, his words getting stuck in his throat. 

Junhui senses his suppressed feelings and without saying anything, he closes the distance between their faces and kisses him, his fingers gently caressing Mingyu’s cheeks.

They have  _ mastered _ the art of conveying their feelings without uttering words, something that can only be achieved when two people stay with each other for a long time. Mingyu and Junhui haven’t even crossed their one-year mark yet. It’s pretty safe to assume that the feeling of knowing each other for centuries still  _ stains _ their essence and their bond keeps growing  _ stronger and deeper.  _

As the kiss heats up between them, Mingyu welcomes him in, their kisses resembling the tender ebb and flow of the tides below.

This is where Mingyu  _ belongs _ and this is where he’ll always want to  _ reside. _

“Oh shit! They are putting their tongues down each other’s throat. Fuck this, I’m out of here.” It sounds like Seungkwan’s scandalised voice but Mingyu can’t seem to care.

He turns his body and wraps his own arms around Junhui’s waist, claiming,  _ no, _ reclaiming the elder as his own.

  
  


~•~

  
  


Seven months later after the reconciliation — May 5th

Junhui wakes up to the tune of weird, futuristic alien music that is set as his alarm tone. His bleary eyes fall on Mingyu who sleeps blissfully beside him, and he notices the rays of the sun kissing Mingyu’s face. Every day, Junhui thinks bitterly,  _ every single day _ he has to compete with  _ Helios _ for Mingyu’s love. Junhui wants to wake Mingyu up slowly and show the higher power that the younger is his and  _ only his, but _ then he remembers his schedule.

Today is supposed to be one of the most important days in his life. He needs to get ready, reach the office, review the agenda one last time and then get driven to the Blue House as the representative of Wen Holdings Limited and meet the President of South Korea. There is absolutely no room for tardiness, and he needs to get out the bed as soon as possible.

Junhui tries to wriggle his body but his efforts go to waste as he’s pinned to the bed by Kim Mingyu’s gigantic arms. 

“Mingyu? Baby, let go of me.” Junhui whispers urgently while lightly tapping his arms.

Bad choice of words apparently because Mingyu tightens his hold around Junhui, drawing his body closer and nuzzling his nose over Junhui’s neck. The latter whimpers because of mild tickles.

“Mingyu!” Junhui grumbles a little louder.

“Hyung,” Mingyu whispers into Junhui’s ears in his deep-ass morning voice. The latter haplessly feels his libido getting ignited. “Do you want to know what day it is today?” Mingyu asks. His lips brush against the shell of Junhui’s ears, and he is a weak,  _ pathetically _ weak man.

Although Mingyu’s question leaves Junhui befuddled for a moment. The latter hasn’t informed the younger about his meeting with the President. What another important thing can the younger be alluding to?

“The day I meet the President?” Junhui tries anyway. Mingyu pulls back and looks at Junhui with a sleep-addled face. The golden rays  _ shine _ brightly over his honey face and Junhui, for just a split second, wants to ravish the other man and get his  _ daily fix. _ When the information finally processes inside Mingyu’s brain, his eyes go wide like saucers and his mouth falls open in shock.

“You’re meeting the  _ President?” _ Mingyu’s voice squeaks at the end.

“Yeah, so I’d really appreciate it if you let me go, darling,” Junhui replies while trying to untangle his body from Mingyu unsuccessfully.

“But hyung!”

“What?”

“Today marks the  _ first anniversary _ of the day we confessed our undying love to each other back in Mendoza.” Mingyu grins, his dark and gentle eyes  _ twinkling _ under the sun.

Junhui repeats the words in his brain. The first anniversary of the day they confessed their undying love to each other. Junhui is touched, to say the least, that the younger remembers such  _ minute details _ about their relationship. The lovely afternoon flashes behind his eyelids and Junhui still vividly  _ remembers _ Mingyu looking at him like he held the universe in his palms. His face looked  _ beautiful and benevolent,  _ and he can still distinctly recall the tranquil smell of bergamot and cardamom, which is now replaced by warm sweetness of  _ iris, musk, lavender. _

Junhui’s evergreen longing for Mingyu  _ intensifies _ in his heart, and he wants to cancel everything just to be with the younger on such a fateful day. But then the President’s face flashes in his brain, and he experiences a  _ whiplash _ because his mind goes from ‘idiot in love’ to ‘idiot who is getting late for his work’.

“God, you’re such a sap.” Junhui likes to be a little difficult at times, not letting his true feelings surface on his face just so that he could catch the opposite person off guard. He thinks his skills were greatly developed in his childhood when he was expected to suppress his emotions around outsiders. Junhui used to have urges to throw tantrums back in the day when he was forced to attend a social gathering and couldn’t hang around Wonwoo just so that he could follow social etiquettes. 

“I don’t have time for this, love!” Junhui once again tries to crawl out of Mingyu’s clutch. Unsuccessful yet again.

“Hyung, indulge me.  _ Please.” _ Mingyu implores as he lazily starts to kiss up Junhui’s jawline. The latter shivers in return.

“Mingyu,  _ time is of the essence!” _ Junhui snarls impatiently. 

In the very next moment, Junhui gets pushed to lay on his back as Mingyu confines his body with his own. Junhui observes  _ fire _ reflecting in the younger’s eyes, his  _ raw and rapacious _ desires dancing in his eyes. Junhui does not have time to entertain the  _ sex god. _

Mingyu comes closer and closer until his lips are levitating over Junhui’s, his breath airing out the  _ desires _ condensing on Junhui’s face in the form of red hues.

“I wanna swallow you, Junhwi.” Mingyu rasps enticingly. 

It’s like a  _ switch, _ all of Junhui’s reluctance strips down as the  _ animal _ that is ravenous for dominance wakes up inside his belly. The impulse to take over  _ flares _ inside him like an inferno and Junhui thirsts for Mingyu’s  _ obedience. _

In the back of his mind, Junhui tells himself that he can spare 10-15 minutes. He is a mutable man, and he can get ready in the car. After all, he has some perks that come with being rich. One of them includes having a personal driver.

“Get off the bed,” Junhui commands in a sturdy voice. Mingyu pulls back and looks at Junhui in a perplexed state until understanding  _ dawns _ over his face, and he slithers away from Junhui immediately and tumbles out of the bed. 

Junhui is a lucky man to have found someone who can read him like an open book. In hindsight, Junhui has always believed that he is an open book. The only problem is that people have never been able to  _ decipher _ the language inscribed all over him. Mingyu, on the other hand, seems to be fluent in the  _ peculiar language of Wen Junhui. _

Mingyu stands gracelessly beside the bed, looking at Junhui for further guidance with eyes that seem to open up to the  _ Garden of Eden. _ Junhui gets up and sits by the corner of the bed, his legs dangling off the edge. He spreads his legs and drinks in the  _ divine image _ of Mingyu standing topless with just his pyjama pants hanging  _ dangerously _ low. 

Mingyu looks gorgeous like this,  _ flushed and eager _ for Junhui. He looks like he  _ belongs to Junhui _ and the latter finds unadulterated delight in that veracity.

_ “Kneel.” _ The air of the room veers the moment this single word comes out of Junhui’s mouth. The whole world boils down to this room where only  _ Junhui and Mingyu _ exist. All other thoughts are wiped clean from their minds and Junhui thinks he can write  _ eternal sonnets _ for the man who complies so easily and goes down on his knees, finding his balance by gripping Junhui’s thighs. 

The elder feels the heat from Mingyu’s palms seep through his pants, and he wants more and more. He gently swipes his thumb below Mingyu’s eyes and observes Mingyu’s eyes sparkle with devotion.

“You want to swallow me, huh? Do you think you can carelessly say words and get away with it?” Junhui reproves him while mirth swirls in his eyes. If Mingyu wants to play the game so be it. Junhui loves to play and watch Mingyu lose control. As time passes by, Mingyu has become tamer, finding pleasure in satisfying Junhui to all ends. The latter takes it as a personal measurement of success when he gets a big and masculine man like Mingyu yielding his whole body to Junhui for his personal use. Junhui absolutely  _ treasures _ this.

“H-hyung.” Mingyu whimpers as his breathing starts to get audibly louder. Junhui hasn’t even touched him and the younger man is getting worked up. He desperately wants to take his time in pulling each of Mingyu’s strings apart but unfortunately, time is  _ against _ them.

“I love it when you misbehave, darling. Gives me a reason to see you like this, all desperate and needy for me.” Junhui runs his fingers over Mingyu’s hair until he reaches the top of his head and then nimbly tangles his fingers in the midnight black locks and pulls on it which earns him a sharp moan from Mingyu. 

“Tell you what, my love. If you promise to be on your best behaviour, I will let you fuck me into this bed tonight.” Junhui leans down and brings his lips closer to Mingyu’s ears. “While wearing those baby pink, lace panties and garter belt we bought as a joke.” 

Junhui feels Mingyu shudder under him, and he knows that he has successfully managed to crawl under the younger’s skin. 

“Fuck, hyung!  _ Please, _ tell me what to do. Just let me be yours.” Mingyu babbles while running his hands up and down Junhui’s thighs. The elder hates the fucking piece of clothing between the scorching palms and his skin. Junhui wants,  _ no, _ he urgently needs to feel the flammable body  _ burn _ his skin into molten lava.

Junhui unties the drawstring of his pants and lifts himself to drag the item completely off his legs. He finally feels  _ liberated _ as his flaccid dick hangs between his legs and Mingyu’s hands find his way back over his thighs, the movement coming  _ naturally _ to the younger.

_ Divine. _ Mingyu’s touch over his skin feels like heaven now, and he sighs in contentment.

“Do what you want to do, baby. Swallow me with that pretty mouth of yours.” Junhui strokes his thumb over Mingyu’s bottom lip.  _ Rosy and soft. _ Like a pretty rose petal. “Make hyung feel good.” 

Mingyu’s eyes light up, and he puts pressure on Junhui’s thumb with his lips until he opens his mouth a little and sucks it in, humming in satisfaction. Junhui feels the wetness of Mingyu’s tongue twirl around his thumb and it feels like he’s drowning and getting  _ baptised, _ the younger’s saliva comparable to  _ holy water _ in Junhui’s judgement.

Mingyu looks up at Junhui from under his lashes which makes the latter suck in his breath as the younger man pulls his mouth back and spits into his palms. Then he starts leaving kisses over Junhui’s inner thigh while wrapping his big hands around the elder’s length and stroking it to life with tender yet firm motions.

Mingyu’s hand is around Junhui’s cock and his lips and tongue are over the elder’s thighs but Junhui feels Mingyu everywhere, his senses getting flooded by  _ Mingyu, Mingyu, Mingyu and Mingyu. _

Junhui wants to hide in Mingyu’s light and make a place for himself. He wants to  _ worship _ Mingyu and prepare an  _ altar _ in his name and fall in  _ deep devotion. _ He’ll probably stick hundreds of nudes of the younger man that he clicked using his camera. Junhui was actually greatly touched when he learnt that Mingyu never threw away the film that contained Mingyu’s nude pictures from that morning in Buenos Aires. _ A beautiful morning. _ A day he felt liberated by his incarcerated past.

When Junhui’s dick finally stands tall and proud against his stomach, Mingyu decides to lean closer and put his lips around the tip of Junhui’s leaking dick. Mingyu laps the precum and swallows the taste, drinking in everything that Junhui has to offer. The other man’s mouth is  _ hot and wet _ around Junhui’s dick but most importantly it's soft and Junhui melts into the heat, letting out a broken whimper in return. 

Mingyu takes the sound as encouragement and opens his mouth wider, sucking in deeper and deeper until his lips kiss the base. Junhui watches Mingyu’s cheeks swell with his cock and his pretty lips slick with saliva and precum. The feral animal inside Junhui  _ growls _ with possessiveness, and he pushes away Mingyu’s hair from his head, so he can look at his lover’s eyes. His pretty,  _ pretty lover _ looks absolutely ravishing with a dishevelled face. Junhui craves to  _ ruin. _

“Just like that, Gyu. So beautiful.” Junhui moans as he lightly pivots his hips. Mingyu is a man who  _ blooms _ under approbation and Junhui wants to give and give  _ all of his love _ until Mingyu is brimming with it. “Fuck, you are so precious. I am the luckiest man in this world to have found perfection in you. You are my perfect baby and I love you like this. Take it, love. It’s yours,  _ everything is yours.” _

Mingyu flutters like a flower under his praises and the sounds he makes around Junhui’s cock are bewitching, a  _ beguiling melody _ stimulating the elder’s body and mind lusciously. The hot air from Mingyu’s nose leaves behind a tantalising sensation over Junhui’s length and the latter can’t help but ram his dick further down Mingyu’s throat. The younger man gags when Junhui’s cockhead hits the back of his throat and Junhui  _ revels _ in the walls of Mingyu’s soft and wet mouth constricting so beautifully around him.

Mingyu looks so docile, so eager, taking his cock like a champ and Junhui wants to spend  _ forever _ like this. Although the world is cruel for not letting him enjoy the epicurean wonders that the mortal plane can provide. He needs to speed up the pace because even when Mingyu is performing magical wonders with his skilled tongue, he’s also going at an agonisingly slow pace. And as a connoisseur in the  _ artistry of dirty talk, _ Junhui thinks he needs to switch things up.  _ Fast. _

“You are such a tease. Told you I have an important meeting yet you want to suck my dick, huh?” Junhui growls quietly as he pulls on Mingyu’s hair and makes eye contact with the younger. Blown out pupils with a depraved expression.  _ Heavenly. _

“You know me and knew I wouldn’t be able to leave once you put the vision in my head and  _ yet _ you opened your filthy mouth. You would’ve loved to hear about me popping a boner in front of the President later, right?” Junhui asks as he leans down to eliminate the distance between their faces. Mingyu pulls his head back from his dick with a loud pop and smears the saliva all over the dick with his deft fingers.

“I fucking would, Jun. Would fucking gloat in the information of you meeting the President and seething with your sinful desires, trying so damn hard to control your mind and body. And if you happened to fail at reining in your erection, then the whole world would know that you,” Mingyu propels his face closer and leaves a wet smack over Junhui’s lips. The elder tastes sleep, his own precum and the inherent sweetness of Mingyu’s mouth. “You are mine.  _ Only mine.” _

Junhui breathes out a guttural moan as his whole body shivers with the visualisation of Mingyu’s words.  _ Fuck, _ Mingyu is becoming better with his salacious words. Technically, Mingyu did learn from Junhui,  _ the best of the best. _

The intense smoke starts to  _ manifest _ from their lustful activity and dance between their bodies.

Mingyu doesn’t waste any time and goes back down Junhui’s length, making sure to swallow deep and keep the suction tight and wet. Junhui starts to chase his own release, his hips stuttering to keep a periodic rhythm. Junhui falls back on the bed and lets the pleasure take over him as he roughly pushes Mingyu’s head into his crotch. The  _ fire _ in his loins starts to spread like wildfire from delicious vibrations and sensations and Junhui can taste his imminent release on the tip of his tongue.

“So close, Gyu. Gonna come for you.” Junhui weakly sputters as his fingers go lax over Mingyu’s head, and he starts to see stars behind his eyelids. His cock pulses with pleasure, and he finally spills down Mingyu’s throat, sighing in gratification. Mingyu sucks and licks his cock dry and pulls off, standing up on his shaky legs and flopping over Junhui’s spent body. 

Junhui lazily takes a glance towards Mingyu to find the latter grinning bashfully. He opens his mouth and Junhui finds it  _ wet and empty. _ God, he really did swallow everything that Junhui had to give. The elder desperately  _ hopes _ that he doesn’t pop a boner in the Blue House while thinking about Mingyu on his knees. 

_ The Blue House.  _

Fuck. Junhui doesn’t have time to laze around.

He pushes Mingyu off him and rushes towards the bathroom on weak feet. 

From behind the closed doors of the bathroom, he hears Mingyu guffaw pompously. Junhui finally awakens to his senses and comprehends the situation. How did this happen to him? How did he miss the  _ urgency _ behind the act? When did his beautiful lover become a  _ fucking malicious brat? _ He wants to scream and walk back to the room and force Mingyu back into submission for being conniving. Unfortunately, he  _ doesn’t have time. _

It’s probably Junhui’s fault for growing weaker for Mingyu as the days go by. 

And Mingyu is the only one in this world who can make him taste his own medicine.

Junhui is  _ bewitched, bothered and bewildered _ yet a fond smile forms on his lips.

  
  


~•~

  
  


Nine months later after the reconciliation — July 3rd

_ Nervousness.  _

It’s a completely natural emotion that floods Mingyu’s consciousness whenever he finds himself in the four-storey mansion of Junhui’s family home in Seongbuk-dong. A luxurious house at the top of the hill, it clearly  _ displays _ the amount of money Junhui’s family lavishes itself in. And the family has a whole team of qualified help to maintain the house. Mingyu truly gets to have a taste of  _ opulence and glamour _ here at Wen’s residence.

Sometimes it's really hard to wrap his head around the fact that his boyfriend is the  _ heir of a chaebol. _

However, even when Mingyu has lived that glamorous life in the United States and gets to live in Junhui’s obnoxiously grand penthouse here in Seoul, he still prefers that small  _ one-bedroom apartment _ back in Buenos Aires over everything else. It was small and a bit cramped compared to all the other accommodations he has been granted but Mingyu and Junhui’s  _ eternal love _ could only grow because of the small space. They were always close to each other and there was practically nothing that Mingyu could miss. All the moments spent there were so precious,  _ only theirs. _

Mingyu was able to find  _ forever in a little while. _

“Mingyu dear? Is the food not to your liking?” Mingyu comes out of his reverie as he hears Junhui’s mother’s sweet voice calling out his name.

Earlier in the day, Junhui had called him up and informed him that he’ll be picking up the younger straight from his studio because they are meant to have dinner with his parents for no apparent reason.

_ “Just, my mother misses me and wants to see my face in person. Nothing special.”  _

Junhui had casually replied on the call and well, Mingyu had no reasons left to decline. The thing is Junhui’s family is aware of their relationship that may be considered  _ unorthodox _ by the public. His family is supportive enough and have practically taken in Mingyu as their  _ fourth son  _ (after Fengjun and Wonwoo) but life isn’t meant to be  _ smooth sailing. _ Even when they know and accept the love between Mingyu and Junhui, they also hope that the relationship will always be kept behind the doors away from the public eye.

The truth takes birth on this planet in the form of  _ trials and tribulations. _ More often than not the truth is accepted by an individual while painting their heart with loathing.

Mingyu looks at the food kept in front of him.  _ Sirloin and rib-eye. _ It’s a bloody feast, Mingyu’s eternal favourite dishes and the food is prepared by a professional chef. If Mingyu could, he would eat these kinds of fatty meats every single day. The food is clearly to his  _ idiosyncratic _ liking. Mingyu lets out a small sigh, careful of maintaining proper etiquettes.

Everything seems to be a problem but at the same time, nothing is wrong. It’s  _ complicated. _ This is  _ youth. _ There is a lot to suffer while being in youth and the only thing left to do is carry on. 

“No, mama. I love it. It’s my favourite.” Just to demonstrate his love for the food, Mingyu slices a big piece of meat and gobbles it, letting out a content sigh. Junhui’s mother perks up at his action and resumes her eating. Junhui takes a big sip from his glass of wine and Mingyu admires the way the lump in his throat bobs. 

“Mingyu-yah?” Junhui’s father calls his name. 

“Yes?” Mingyu has a lot of respect for Junhui’s father and also gratitude for bringing the man in this world, but he would be lying if he said he isn’t  _ intimidated _ by the old man. He has that daunting aura that demands fear and respect. Mingyu wonders if Junhui would end up like his father in the future. 

“I was hoping you would join me for golf tomorrow morning.” It’s not a request, more of a presupposition. But Mingyu doesn’t mind it. He loves hanging out with Junhui’s father. The elder’s family is more or less Mingyu’s  _ second family _ now.

“Of course, papa!” 

“That’s good to hear.” Junhui’s father returns a pleased smile, crows feet forming around his eyes.

“Your dream of having a son who can engage in your interest in recreational sports has finally come true, papa.” Junhui wisecracks from beside Mingyu and both parents laugh heartily at his joke. Mingyu snickers as well just to look polite. 

The dinner goes along well and Mingyu gets to hear Junhui’s embarrassing childhood stories that he cherishes deep inside his heart. It’s by the end of their dinner, Junhui’s father looks at Mingyu with  _ indistinguishable _ eyes and speaks something in Mandarin when an unsettling fear registers deep inside his stomach. Suddenly, the air in the room feels  _ suffocating _ as Junhui starts to argue back. Mingyu can’t seem to understand the spoken language, but he is acquainted with the elder’s body language. And it's  _ defensive. Vigilant.  _ Almost  _ protective.  _

Junhui’s father lets out a deep sigh and with regretful eyes, apologises to everyone and excuses himself. Junhui’s mother follows after him and Mingyu looks at Junhui expectantly wanting to understand and perceive the situation for himself. Junhui caresses his cheeks and gives him a sympathetic smile instead.

  
  


Junhui suggests that they spend the night at his parent’s place seeing as Mingyu has plans to play golf with his father the next day. Mingyu easily agrees and is guided by the family butler (again, how did he end up with someone so rich baffles Mingyu’s mind) to a guest room. 

Junhui enters the room shortly after, having changed into his pyjamas suit and sits at the edge of the bed.

“Do I really need to needle out the discussion you had with papa at the dinner table?” Mingyu gets straight to the point. Junhui shifts closer and reaches for Mingyu’s hand. It’s unusually  _ cold and clammy. _ Mingyu grabs his other hand and encapsulates them in his own hoping to transmit his  _ warmth _ to him. A weak smile blooms on Junhui’s lips.

“He just said that it’s a shame that a good man like you has to give up his autonomy just to be with me,” Junhui speaks with a despondent sneer on his face. “He kind of wishes you to open your eyes to reality and leave me for your own good because you deserve happiness. You  _ deserve _ better.” A tear spills down Junhui’s eyes as he finishes speaking. 

The walls around Mingyu start to disintegrate into dust as he hears thunderstorms. It takes a lot of strength and courage to be a person like Junhui who is both  _ soft and gentle _ and yet rarely ever shows his weakness. In simple words, Junhui rarely ever cries. Mingyu moves and takes the other man in his embrace.  _ Home. His safe place. _

“Hyung, you know I will nev–” Junhui interrupts Mingyu and tries to pull back. Mingyu tightens his hold.

“No, it’s nothing. I’ve learnt to block out my father’s words. I’m not–”

_ “Hyung. _ Stay still and let me comfort you. You don’t need to pretend that you are strong here with me. I’m here with you. I’ll  _ always _ be here,” Mingyu places his hand over Junhui’s chest, right above the elder’s heart. He feels the heart throb violently under his palm. Time cannot change the effect they can have over each other. It’s  _ phenomenal. _ “Here inside your heart. So be honest with me and tell me, how do you feel right now?” 

Mingyu rubs his other palm over Junhui’s back soothingly. Junhui blows out an airy sigh over Mingyu's neck and the latter  _ shivers _ from the tingling sensation it leaves behind on his body.

“I don’t want you to leave me, Mingyu-yah,” Junhui confesses meekly.

“I will never leave you. I want to do everything with you and  _ only you. _ That includes getting old together and seeing you getting grumpy and wrinkly.” Mingyu tries to lighten the mood which kind of works because he gets a punch to his arm.

“Hey!”

“I am sure you will still have a stellar libido and I promise to work extra hard just so that I can keep up with your satanic stamina, hyung.” Mingyu knows he is asking for trouble now. But if his jokes help to steer away Junhui’s mind from dreadful thoughts then Mingyu will openly receive some battering. 

Junhui does push him and tackles him to the bed, something very  _ expected. _ But what turns out to be clearly  _ unexpected _ is that Junhui interlocks his hands with Mingyu’s and negates the distance between the lips that are meant to be kissed with Mingyu’s lips. Junhui kisses him with a fervour that surprises the younger. It’s  _ electric. Sizzling. Breathtaking. _ Mingyu feels his ears throbbing with excitement, and he wants to swamp himself in Junhui’s  _ paradisiacal love.  _

“You are mine,” Junhui says in between the kisses, a little territorial and completely stating the  _ facts _ in Mingyu’s humble opinion.

“Yours.” Mingyu gasps as Junhui’s lips meander down to his jawline. “You are mine, Junhwi.” Mingyu manages to splutter his own declaration.

“Only yours. Just me and you.  _ Me and you.” _ Junhui mumbles over Mingyu’s neck. 

Junhui is his heart, his moon, his destiny and his life. Everything between  _ the sand and the stardust. _ But at the moment, Junhui is the  _ fire of his loins,  _ and he desperately longs to be close to the elder. In the most  _ intimate _ way possible.

“Hyung? Stay the night with me.” 

By all accounts, it seems to be the wrong choice of words because Junhui springs back and gets off the bed at a lightning-fast speed. He fixes his clothes and looks at Mingyu with a scandalised expression.

“Ah, Mingyu-yah. I think you should sleep now. I will take my leave.” Junhui speaks robotically.

_ “Hyung?” _ Mingyu squeals in shock.

“Baby, I love you and everything, but I am  _ not _ going to sleep with you under my parents’ roof,” Junhui says solemnly. Mingyu’s mouth falls open. 

_ Unbelievable. _

“Hyung, your parents are not even sleeping on this floor. They won’t even hear us.” Mingyu argues back fanatically because in all seriousness, his dick is half hard and Wen Junhui is being ridiculous.

“Are you mad? I grew up in this house. Some things are meant to stay sacred and untarnished. Now if you don’t mind, I am leaving.” Junhui replies with a determined resolution tattooed on his face and Mingyu wants to scream.

“Hyung, you can’t just leave me like this.” Mingyu whines.

“Well, I can and you will watch me leave.  _ Look!” _ Junhui genuinely starts to walk towards the door. He unlocks the door and turns one last time to look at Mingyu. A bright and cheerful grin adorns his beautiful face. The man emits his  _ mystic light _ and for a moment, Mingyu  _ drowns _ in devotion. His tender feelings take over for a split second and Mingyu only remembers being crazily in love with Junhui.

“Goodnight, my love. Dream of me.” The dreamy devoutness  _ shatters _ as Mingyu watches Junhui slam the door behind him. 

He breathes in the remnants of yuzu, lotus and vetiver and with revenge clouding his mind, he jumps out of the bed and charges after the elder to his own room because he can’t have Junhui get the last laugh. 

After all, to love is to  _ settle scores _ with your guileful lover.

  
  


~•~

  
  


Twelve months later after the reconciliation — October 14th

Mingyu is gone.

Junhui feels so cold now as he can’t feel the other man beside him and praise the perfection curated by the gods. This separation from Mingyu feels  _ cataclysmic _ and Junhui desperately wants the younger back in his arms. He wants to kneel at Mingyu’s feet, lay down his weapons and offer his heart. Junhui is always meant to be Mingyu’s. 

Without him, it feels like he is under the earth,  _ forsaken. _

“Aren’t you being too dramatic?” Jihoon asks critically. Tonight, the shorter man has decided to grace Junhui with his company, and they both are sitting in Junhui’s terrace garden and stargazing. The sky is clear and the night is cold. Junhui feels extra cold because of  _ Mingyu’s absence. _ “Mingyu’s only gone to visit his family in Seattle for the week. He’ll be back, you know?”

_ “Jihoonie, _ life can get dull if we take it too seriously. It’s good to dramatise our emotions and assimilate all kinds of  _ sentiments _ in life.” Junhui replies exaggeratedly. Jihoon scoffs in return.

“You and Mingyu truly belong to each other.” Jihoon comments in awe. Junhui laughs unabatedly, mischief twirling in his eyes.

It’s been more than a year since Junhui and Mingyu got together for good. Unlike how  _ fast _ they fell in love and shared their bodies and hearts, their relationship has been moving at a  _ stable pace, _ and they both are peeling apart each other’s layers slowly, learning something new every day. At the end of the day, even when they feel like they’ve known each other for centuries, they had lived a moderately long life before meeting each other. And Junhui is very fond of  _ digging out _ the ancient in Mingyu. 

Yet there is one topic that even Junhui hesitates to bring up every time and even when Mingyu starts to speak about it, he is the one who quickly dismisses it by talking about something random or absurd.

_ Kim Mingyu’s dark past. _

“Jihoonie? Can I ask you something that might be a little too sensitive?” Junhui asks carefully. 

“Related to Mingyu?” 

“Yeah.”

Jihoon nods in return giving a green light to Junhui.

“Well, how did Mingyu get into substance–” Junhui has a hard time finishing the question. He looks out towards the city and wonders if he really wants to know. 

“Mingyu is a good man. But he is good-natured to a  _ fault. _ He has this self-destructive trait where he can’t say no to anyone. A young, handsome and talented musician is like  _ fresh meat _ in the western music industry filled with  _ voracious sharks. _ And everyone wanted to exploit him. Few months after our debut, some rich and young influencers invited him to a music festival in Miami. All I know is that the Mingyu that did manage to return from that trip wasn’t the naive, hopeful and a little lost Mingyu that  _ I knew. _ He was trapped in the vicious cycle of drugs and sex and things just went downhill after that.” Jihoon lies down on his back and looks up at the sky with eyes that look regretful and sad. Junhui can only imagine the state of pandemonium that Jihoon went through. 

Suddenly, Junhui hears Jihoon snickering which slowly turns into a burst of full-blown laughter. 

“What’s so funny?” Junhui asks with puzzled eyes.

“There is one thing that Mingyu was able to reject vehemently.” Jihoon turns his face towards Junhui. “The man doesn’t have any tattoos because he is scared of needles.” Junhui has always admired the ink embellishing Jihoon’s body. In contrast to him, Mingyu’s honey skin is  _ unmarked. _ Not that Junhui has any complaints about it when he regards it as his palette for his  _ divine creation _ with his fingers, nails, lips and teeth. 

“It’s funny how the world perceives him as this bad and intimidating man when in reality he is just the softest man with a big heart. Mingyu is like  _ candy, _ hard outside but soft and gooey centre.” Junhui sums up Kim Mingyu fondly. Jihoon lets out a gagging noise.

“Yeah, I am not fucking him so don’t expect me to write epigram about him,” Jihoon states in his signature style. Being blunt is  _ Jihoon’s forte _ and Junhui likes that aspect of the shorter man.  _ No bullshit. Straight up facts.  _

“I like how the media thinks I know Mingyu through you because you are my new best friend,” Junhui says after a while, breaking the comfortable silence between them and trying to keep the momentum of their dialogues moving. 

Junhui happens to enjoy Jihoon’s company beyond everything. There is something great about the way Junhui feels a  _ forgotten kinship _ with Jihoon that has the former wanting to spend more time with the shorter man. They both have very similar views of the world and happen to have the same temperament.  _ Harmony _ between them comes  _ naturally. _

“It’s probably to do with the Korean culture of only considering the same age people as friends.” Jihoon remarks. “I read in an article that people consider me as Jeon Wonwoo’s replacement.”

The comment makes Junhui laugh a little until he feels a sharp sting in his chest. 

_ Wonwoo. _

It’s been seventeen months since Wonwoo left for his conscription. Four months more, and he’ll be finally discharged along with Chan. Junhui thinks it's  _ high time _ he visits his base. The three times when Wonwoo did manage to come home to Seoul, Junhui, in a very  _ iffy fashion, _ had to fly out of the country for important conferences or meetings. To Junhui, it genuinely feels like the other man is  _ purposefully _ avoiding him at all costs. But he can’t really do anything about it.

“I have a feeling that you’ll get along with Wonwoo.”

“Hmm, I’ll be the judge of that,” Jihoon replies.

“I’d also like to advise you to be courteous of Chan,” Jihoon suggests offhandedly. Jihoon raises an eyebrow suspiciously.

“Why?”

“He is expected to join Aquarii Entertainment after he finishes college,” Junhui answers ambiguously.

_ “Junhwi,” _ Jihoon calls his name sternly, not in the mood to talk in circles.

“I am actually disappointed that you haven’t done enough research on the top management of the company you work for,” Junhui says instead. Rather than saying anything, Jihoon just scowls in return. “Well,  _ your boss, _ the CEO of Aquarii Entertainment is Lee Chan’s father.” 

The colour from Jihoon’s face fades away so fast, it’s laughable.

“You’re shitting me.”

“I am not.” Junhui tries to hide his snicker by covering his mouth with his hands.

“What is with you rich people owning  _ everything?” _ Jihoon vents his frustration by getting up and making rounds around the garden while going on a zealous monologue of how capitalism is ruining the sanctity of the society.

Junhui views the amusing spectacle while chugging the beer down and enjoying the lovely night. 

Mingyu may have taken some warmth away from Junhui for the time being but the elder thinks he can always find different kinds of warmth in friendship. All his life, he only had Wonwoo, Seungkwan and Chan as a part of his inner circle. Since he met Mingyu, his inner circle has now extended to Jihoon, Minghao and a certain extent — Seokmin.

Junhui was able to find these connections by himself.  _ Independently. On his own. _

The Argentinian holiday might have really ended up teaching a thing or two about independence and Junhui is at  _ peace _ with that reality.

  
  


~•~

  
  


Fourteen months later after the reconciliation — December 16th

Mingyu thinks this is a  _ colossally bad idea. _ They shouldn’t be doing this. More importantly,  _ he _ shouldn’t be doing this. Maybe he should request the driver to turn around and drop him off at some motel. But Mingyu knows that it is too late because the car is already on the access road of 7th Infantry Division Headquarters, and he can see the main gates. 

For the love of everything that is holy, Kim Mingyu is finally going to meet Jeon Wonwoo.  _ Byeongjang Jeon Wonwoo. _

“It’ll be alright. I’m with you.” Junhui senses his dreadful mood and tries to mollify him. It doesn’t work.

“Stop chickening out, Mingyu hyung. If you let Wonwoo hyung intimidate you, I suggest you should prepare yourself for heartbreak as well because your breakup seems inevitable.” Seungkwan comments in a provoking tone from the passenger’s seat.

_ “Jun hyung!” _ Mingyu whines while seeking some defence.

“Seungkwan, stop it!” Junhui chastises the youngest. “And  _ you!” _ He proceeds to give Mingyu a sharp look. “If anyone should be worried sick, it should be me! Wonwoo and I have grown distant over the past year or so and I don’t know if he’ll be happy to see me or not. He clearly has been avoiding me.” Junhui pouts.

“I did meet him during Chuseok and asked him about you. His exact words were,  _ ‘What kind of ridiculous question is that Seungkwan-ah? I love Jun-ah, and we’ll always be together.’ _ Then he tried to change the topic and I couldn’t dig in further.” Seungkwan imitates Wonwoo’s voice and it sounds painstakingly deep. Mingyu has no idea how deep it really is.

“Well let's hope everything goes well,” Junhui says. Then he addresses Seungkwan. “God, I wasn’t nervous when you and I went to meet Chan back in March. I can’t believe meeting Wonwoo is giving me anxiety. The man who has always provided me with comfort.” He further laments while sinking into his seat. 

Mingyu hopes that he won’t have to see the  _ sunset in the blue. _

  
  


In the meeting room, after waiting for a good 20 minutes, Mingyu finally notices a tall man entering the room. Junhui rushes towards the said man and takes the man in his warm embrace.

“Wonwoo-yah! I missed you so damn much.”

Mingyu had psyched himself up and prepared for anything that may come to him. But as he watches his lover getting hugged by  _ another man, _ he realises that he is a weak man.

_ “Junnie. _ I missed you, too.” Wonwoo whispers while pressing his head into Junhui’s neck. His voice is  _ deeper _ than Lake Baikal and Mingyu feels a  _ tingle _ down his spine just from the vibrations. Mingyu’s blood has started to boil, the weakness bringing out his  _ ugly emotions. _

Junhui’s back is towards Mingyu so it gives Wonwoo the perfect opportunity to lift his head and make eye contact with him. 

_ Sharp and dark eyes _ as cold as steel freeze Mingyu to his spot. Even his round-rimmed glasses can’t seem to undermine the clear  _ provocation _ in them.

Wonwoo goads Mingyu by tightening his arms around Junhui’s shoulder while throwing a devious smirk towards him. Junhui lets out a whimper from being squished so roughly by him and Mingyu loses it because he is, at the end of the day, a  _ weak man. _

Mingyu clears his throat vehemently hoping that the noise will break the bubble that Junhui seems to be enchanted in and separate himself from Wonwoo.

“Honestly, this feels like a lovers' reunion,” Seungkwan comments with nonchalance. 

Apparently, Seungkwan’s voice prods Wonwoo to pull back from the hug instead of Junhui. Either way, Mingyu is  _ grateful. _

“Hello to you too, Seungkwan-ah.” Wonwoo greets him conventionally.

“Ah, I see. It's a  _ business-as-usual _ attitude towards me.” The hostile behaviour between Seungkwan and Wonwoo is something Mingyu has only heard about. Today, he gets to witness it with his own eyes and if he didn’t know about their established friendship, he’d think that he is watching two rivals greet each for the sake of  _ sportsmanship. _

_ “Wonwoo.” _ Junhui’s tone sounds exhorting. Wonwoo softens his stance and finally, his lips curve into a smile.

Jeon Wonwoo is a beautiful man, Mingyu begrudgingly thinks.

“Come on! Hug your hyung, you idiot.” Wonwoo speaks as he opens his arms while turning towards Seungkwan. The youngest drops his act as well and jumps into Wonwoo’s arms.  _ A happy reunion. _

Once the two men separate, Wonwoo ruffles Seungkwan’s hair fondly and the latter mocks him for being bald. An exaggeration from Seungkwan’s end but Mingyu does not find any fault in it. Mainly because Wonwoo hasn’t shown him any favourable actions yet.

“You look good, Wonwoo-yah.” Junhui compliments the man and at this point, Mingyu is at the crossroads of believing whether his lover is really oblivious to his discomfort or doing all this on purpose. Knowing Junhui, Mingyu will like to go with the latter option just because he knows Junhui likes to  _ push all his buttons. _

“Oh my god, Jun-ah! Thanks. For a moment I had forgotten how forthright you can be.” Wonwoo splutters as red starts to flush on his cheeks. 

_ That’s it. _ Pack up. Mingyu has seen enough and he wants to leave. Along with Junhui because he is not letting him anywhere near  _ that man. _

“Well, someone else is here to meet you as well.” It’s Seungkwan who speaks up. Wonwoo finally looks at Mingyu and  _ ‘officially’ _ acknowledges his presence.

“Wonwoo, I am pleased to finally introduce you to my Mingyu,” Junhui says with a blinding smile. For a moment, Mingyu only focuses on  _ ‘my Mingyu’ _ part. 

_ ‘Only his’, _ Mingyu wants to add.

_ “Oh? _ I didn’t see you there.” Wonwoo speaks in English. Mingyu can see Wonwoo’s nose growing. There is no way in hell he didn’t see Mingyu here. The man is 187 centimetres tall. “Hello, I am Wonwoo. I heard you were American. It’s nice to finally put a face to your name.” Wonwoo extends his hand. Mingyu ignores it.

“Hello,” Mingyu replies in Korean trying to smile politely and not obliterate the man in front of him. “I am Kim Mingyu. It’s very considerate of you to speak in English but my Korean is good.” 

The smile on Wonwoo’s face slowly morphs into a straight line while the coldness in his eyes returns. Mingyu gloats internally.

“I see. Still, a shame you can’t speak  _ his _ mother tongue.” Wonwoo whispers in a deep voice. It’s a taunt and Mingyu knows it. It still  _ irks _ him.

“What are you two whispering about?” Junhui asks.

“Junnie? Seungkwannie? Can you please leave the room for five minutes? I just want to have a private word with Kim Mingyu-sshi here.” Wonwoo is pleading but his tone sounds more commanding. 

_ “Absolutely not! _ I am not letting you hound Mingyu like you’ve hounded all my lovers in the past. Wonwoo, Mingyu is not like others. He is  _ not replaceable.” _ Junhui tries to pull back Wonwoo by his arms but the latter puts his hands over Junhui’s. He turns his head and looks at Junhui. 

Mingyu can’t see Wonwoo’s face but a silent conversation  _ transpires _ between Junhui and Wonwoo and Mingyu can only watch helplessly. Junhui finally releases a deep sigh and loosens his grip over Wonwoo’s arms until he completely retracts his hand and dejectedly walks out of the room. Seungkwan follows after him wordlessly.

Mingyu comes to an unwelcome conclusion. Junhui and Wonwoo’s bond is  _ too loud. _ In a large room, they will be loud even if they don’t exchange a single word. Their relationship can  _ sing _ solely on the exchange of looks and gestures.

Mingyu is not only a weak man, but he is also a  _ jealous man. _

“I’ll make it quick,” Wonwoo speaks as he turns around to face Mingyu.

Mingyu has been living among the richest of the rich in South Korea for almost a year. If his habitation has taught him anything, it's that rich people like to get under someone’s skin inconspicuously and  _ manipulate _ the person into doing what they want. There is something  _ farcical _ about rich people craving drama in their everyday lives. To them, the best source of  _ entertainment _ can only be delivered in real-life circumstances rather than screens or papers. 

So as Mingyu observes Wonwoo turning around dramatically, his eyes half-lidded and sharp with his jaw clenched, he can’t help but wonder what drama will he get roped into. If anything, Mingyu tries to school his laughter watching a rich man dressed in a military uniform who is about to address him. Something about this scene seems so improbable. A  _ money bag serving his country _ for the time being.

“You make Junhwi happy.”

Now  _ that’s _ a sentence Mingyu didn’t expect to hear. Mingyu tries to discern chicanery behind Wonwoo’s words but finds nothing. 

“I do. And he makes me happy.” Mingyu replies.

“Don’t get it twisted.” Wonwoo counters fiercely. “I couldn't care less about how you feel. My prime concern  _ starts and ends _ with Moon Junhwi.” 

“What are you concerned about?” Mingyu asks, irritation gradually seeping inside his blood vessels. 

“I have heard about the things he’s done for you. Some very impractical actions. He’s under your spell and that is dangerous.” Wonwoo says.

_ Dangerous. _ For a second, Mingyu can’t seem to recall the meaning of the word. And if Wonwoo thinks that only Junhui is the one under his spell, then learning about Mingyu’s devotion would be a  _ nightmare _ for the man.

“Could you clarify how that's dangerous?” Mingyu asks.

“I’m sure you have heard that Junnie and I are meant to be partners after the merger of our family business.”

Something about the way Wonwoo words his sentence makes Mingyu go ballistic. He knows that he shouldn’t let himself be provoked by the other man. If his past mistakes have taught him anything, it’s to not let pride get the best of him. But Mingyu is a  _ weak man. _

He strides closer to Wonwoo and looks him in the eye. He’s the taller and broader man here. The game of intimidation is clearly  _ in his favour. _

“Careful there,  _ Jeon Wonwoo-sshi. _ Don’t forget to add  _ business _ before partners.” Mingyu rectifies him. “You know if I had to guess, I would say that you are aggrieved by the fact that I have replaced you in such a short period. That you have been  _ dethroned _ from Jun’s heart. You have no authority over his decisions anymore and you, the man who has practically stuck by Jun’s side since childhood, might  _ hate _ it.”

Hurt flashes over Wonwoo’s eyes and Mingyu can’t help but  _ rejoice _ in it. Until his  _ empathetic nature _ takes over, and he starts to feel bad about Wonwoo’s plight. 

Although it doesn’t last because Wonwoo recovers fast and his eyes become cold and distant again.

“You might be special but don’t be naive and think you are an exception. Life is unpredictable and every single love story has an ending. I have watched countless people walk in and out of Junhwi’s life. And do you know who always gets to be by his side?  _ It’s me. _ You and I are incomparable. I grew up with him. I have always been there for him. Do you want to know when he was trying to figure out his sexuality, who his first fuck was? That’s right.  _ It was me.” _ Wonwoo speaks into Mingyu’s face, a malicious smirk on his lips. 

Mingyu’s hand itches to punch the glasses off Wonwoo’s face. He clenches his fist as his knuckles turn white from the pressure. Mingyu sees a vision of Junhui together with Wonwoo.  _ Naked. _ Sweating bodies wrapped up together. Wonwoo’s name on Junhui’s lips. 

_ Red. _ He goes stark raving mad. His sight is coloured red from anger and jealousy. But as he forces himself to perceive the situation rationally, he can see what Wonwoo is trying to do. Mingyu uses his mentality and wakes up to reality. 

_ It’s a fucking bait. _

And he won’t let the rich bastard win.

“I know what you’re trying to do and I won’t fall for your petty games. You know why? Because  _ I am _ a better man. And I can make Jun happy in every way possible.  _ Both mental and physically.”  _ Mingyu insinuates the  _ unspoken truth _ that Wonwoo can never be Junhui’s lover. 

“You don’t want to make an enemy of me,  _ Kim Mingyu-sshi. _ I can make your life a living hell.” Mingyu can clearly see that Wonwoo is trying his level best to terrorise him. But all of this only makes him laugh. 

Mingyu has fallen to the depths of the  _ scalding hell _ and had his body scorched and mutilated for all his sins in the past. Wonwoo’s remark sounds like an 8-year-old’s threat in a playground.  _ Harmless. Nerveless. Innocent.  _

“A living hell? Go ahead, I  _ dare _ you. I want to see the things you are capable of. I want to see how a sophisticated and privileged man like you can destroy me. This is my open challenge to you. I will warn you that you cannot further wreck an already wretched man. You cannot even imagine the  _ horrors _ I’ve seen while you kept believing that you own this world with a  _ silver spoon _ in your mouth.” Confusion starts to highlight Wonwoo’s features. 

There is a  _ sense of liberation _ for Mingyu in admitting about his past to an unfamiliar man. He is no longer trying to be a different man who desperately tries to hide his old reputation. In fact, he wears the mark of his past demons like a tattoo on his skin,  _ a brand. _ He wants people to know that he had a twisted past, but he was able to pull himself out of the madness. Pleasure and pain are past and memories are his prison cell. And he’s  _ free. Discharged. Broken out of the shackles.  _

Mingyu wants people to know that even if it seems impossible,  _ change is possible. _

“Also, if you do think of touching a hair on my body, I would like you to ask yourself a question,  _ ‘What would Junhwi think of this?’ _ Can you live with the guilt that you were the cause of his sadness, Jeon Wonwoo-sshi?” Mingyu asks daringly. 

Mingyu, weirdly enough, feels good after letting out the fumes. The fire inside him seems to be contained and extinguished, and he can finally feel his muscles unfurling. 

Wonwoo closes his eyes and takes a deep breath in.

“Call me hyung.”

“What?”

“I am older than you.”

“I don’t understand.” They were having a heated argument a moment ago. Why is Wonwoo suddenly talking about honorifics? 

The door to the room opens and Mingyu notices Seungkwan peeking in.

“Are you both done?” He asks weakly.

“Yeah,” Wonwoo replies.

Seungkwan straightens up and pushes the door further open. Junhui rushes inside and makes a beeline towards Mingyu.

“Are you okay?” Junhui asks as he cups Mingyu’s face in his warm hands and looks at him with unabated concern. Mingyu covers Junhui’s hands with his own and nods with a smile.

“I’m okay.”

“You’re okay,” Junhui confirms in disbelief and then turns around to face Wonwoo. The latter shrugs in return.

And just like that, Mingyu is forced to banish from his thoughts that the past five minutes had  _ actually happened. _ Mostly because Wonwoo refuses to acknowledge it any further. The only takeaway from that argument is that Mingyu is supposed to address Wonwoo as a  _ ‘hyung’  _ now.

  
  


Their visiting time ends after ten minutes, and they make plans to meet after two months when Wonwoo gets discharged from the military. Junhui promises to come and pick him up personally. Seungkwan already has plans to pick up Chan from the infantry he is posted at. Mingyu just keeps his mouth shut because he has a life of his own.

While walking back through the base towards the parking lot, Mingyu lets curiosity get the best of him and asks Junhui in a hushed voice.

“Did you sleep with Wonwoo hyung in the past?” The question definitely takes Junhui by surprise.

“What the fuck?  _ Why _ would you think I slept with Wonwoo?” Junhui’s face looks scandalised. That seems a bit reassuring.

“Because he told me?” 

Junhui absorbs his words, and then he controls his expressions and puts on his sunglasses. 

“It’s his thing. He likes to spew lies to get into a person’s psyche and control them. He’s quite good at the art of manipulation.” Junhui says.

_ “Art?” _ Mingyu barks in shock.

“If you think Moon Junhwi is a master at pulling the strings, you have yet to experience the menace that is Jeon Wonwoo.” Seungkwan comments from Junhui’s other side. “By the way, congratulations.”

“For what?” Mingyu asks while opening the door of the car and seating himself in. 

As much as he’s grateful that he was able to visit the demilitarized zone, he would like to get out of here and back to Seoul as soon as possible. It’s a cold and flashy city, devoid of warmth and life but it’s  _ his home. _ It’s the city where he was able to find a new life and start all over again.  _ Through love. _ Through the fire, he was born again. Just like a  _ phoenix, _ ready to spread his wings and fly again.

“Wonwoo hyung accepted you.” Seungkwan answers as he gets comfortable in the front and wears the seatbelt. 

“Why do you think that?”

“Because he asked you to call him hyung,” Junhui speaks instead, a tiny smile on his face.

Mingyu looks out the window as the car starts to move. It’s a shame he can’t click photos of the place. He would like to immortalise the view of the spectacular tanks and fighter planes. But he would also like to stay away from jail and not be deported back to the United States. 

He imagines the scenario where his relationship ends with Junhui because of a photograph as the elder man can’t leave his position to be with Mingyu in the United States. Junhui will get  _ royally pissed _ about it and Mingyu can’t afford that. 

“Hyung? Are you relieved?” Mingyu turns around to gauge Junhui’s emotions by reading his face. His eyes land on the lips that are created to be appreciated, adored and kissed on a regular basis by only Mingyu and no one but  _ Mingyu. _ Junhui bites on his lower lips as he looks out the window pensively. 

“Honestly, I want to cry,” Junhui admits and turns to look at Mingyu. The younger can see tears threatening to escape his eyes. “I saw Wonwoo after 19 months. And seeing his face reminded me of how important he is to me. All this time, I was so focused on my love for you that I just–” 

Mingyu understands that Junhui isn’t necessarily blaming him for their love, but he is blaming himself for being selfish and seeking out happiness. 

It’s a  _ typical Junhui thing _ to always put others over him and willingly suffer the anguish for other’s comfort.

It’s a  _ typical Mingyu thing _ to always feel the elder’s pain and willingly take half of it from the other, so he can lessen the burden.

Mingyu reaches for Junhui’s hand placed on top of the armrest and squeezes it lightly. He feels a deep nudge inside his solar plexus, the moment his fingertips rest over Junhui’s soft hands.  _ Soft like velvet.  _

If it all happened a year ago, Mingyu would’ve spoken a bit too much, ran his hands over Junhui’s body a bit too much and probably even used his lips that the elder says hold the sun,  _ a bit too much. _ But their relationship has matured a lot in one year, and he knows that they aren't alone in the car. Their once overtly passionate love has mellowed down, and they both prefer to keep it a private affair now. 

Mingyu knows he would end up doing a lot of things in the safety of their apartment but for now, he thinks just letting Junhui know that he is beside the elder without putting it into words is enough.

Junhui isn’t the kind of person who spends a lot of time  _ stressing _ over a thing. He likes to get over things fast, either by letting it go or burying deep inside him. Either way, he comes back to his usual self after contemplating for a little while by himself. Although nowadays, if he buries something inside, then Mingyu makes sure to  _ dig _ the problem and  _ burn _ it till it no longer haunts Junhui. This is how  _ he loves. _

Surely enough, Junhui recovers fast and gets on a client call after a while. Mingyu decides to put on earphones and listen to some demo songs he’s been working on while admiring the countryside by looking out the window.

Junhui slowly reaches for his hands and interlocks their fingers. He’s still on his phone and Mingyu thinks it’s pretty  _ convenient _ that he is left-handed while Junhui is right-handed. This way, they can hold hands without having to stop their tasks. Junhui never loosens his grip and their hands remain connected the whole ride back.

It’s the  _ little things _ that amount to the  _ great love _ they share.

  
  


~•~

  
  


Seventeen months later after the reconciliation — March 17th

The sight in front of Junhui is  _ one to behold. _ The mountains are green and flowers are blooming everywhere. For a second there, Junhui can ignore his heavy breathing and the atrocious burn in his thighs from hiking for two hours in lieu of the scenery. 

Chongqing is meant to be a  _ delight _ in the middle of March, just before the peak travelling season chimes in when spring graces the place with her  _ gifts _ and decorates the land with  _ divine beauty. _ It is also meant to be his mother’s home town and Junhui is a  _ true-blue son. _

Junhui has been wanting to bring Mingyu to China for quite some time now. There is this urge to show the younger man his true roots. Junhui never truly lived here, but he feels  _ blessed _ to be able to explore the area with his lover. It makes the activity more special because Junhui is experiencing something new with Mingyu. One of the many  _ firsts _ they have had together.

“Wow, hyung! This place is spectacular!” Mingyu comments in wonder. Just like Junhui, his exterior looks spent but it  _ warms _ Junhui’s heart to know that the younger is trying to enjoy the hike to entertain his wishes. 

Junhui turns around to check if the bodyguards are keeping up with them. They are tailing the couple to keep them safe because Wen Junhui and Kim Mingyu are important men. And they can only let their love manifest out in the open when they are aware of their secluded state. Additionally, Junhui needs utmost privacy for a very  _ significant reason _ that is bound to change their lives.

Once they reach the top of the mountain, Junhui discreetly motions for the bodyguards to give the two some solitude. 

“I’m really thankful to you Mingyu. I feel like being loved by you is a wonderful thing in this world. And loving you is even more wonderful.” Junhui confesses as he looks out to the Yangtze river flowing below. The greenish-blue river looks almost  _ tranquil and deep. _

Mingyu walks over to Junhui and brings his fingers close to Junhui’s face. He lightly plays with wild strands of Junhui’s hair and the latter sees pure, passionate love  _ swirling _ in Mingyu’s eyes. He takes a shaky breath in and breathes in  _ bergamot and cardamom _ because Mingyu has gone back to using his old perfume. 

It’s the scent of the man Junhui fell in love with, and he thinks it's  _ poetic _ that he gets to reminiscence in that sweet and peaceful scent again right before his  _ imminent set of actions. _

Junhui thinks he can start spouting some bullshit story to ease into things but his heart is beating erratically fast, and he can’t really maintain a poker face while his jacket’s pocket feels  _ extremely heavy. _

“Loving you is easy, Junhwi. You are a beautiful mess but you are  _ my _ chaotic mess and life with you is a grand adventure.” Kim Mingyu spouting such romantic lines is  _ definitely _ not helping Junhui’s case at the moment. 

Junhui takes a deep breath in and takes out a small piece of box from the pocket that seems to be weighing down. He retracts Mingyu’s hand from his hair and places the box over his palm, closing the fingers over it after.

“Here. I want you to have it.”

The serene expression on Mingyu’s face melts into something inscrutable, his eyes turn distant and glazed. He looks at his closed palm for a very long time and then hesitantly, he proceeds to uncurl the fingers around the box. 

The red leather pill box has a golden lace border on the surface. Mingyu opens his mouth, then closes it, only to open it back again like a  _ gaping fish _ out of the water.

“Hyung? Is this what I thi–” Mingyu  _ chokes _ on his own words as Junhui watches fresh tears streaming down Mingyu’s face. 

It was an expected reaction but Junhui didn’t anticipate that it would  _ trigger _ his own tears.

“I know you say that our love is unconditional and I  _ want _ to believe that it is but– how do I say this? I can’t give you–” Junhui’s voice wavers with fear of the unknown. It wavers from being  _ exposed _ completely in front of Mingyu. “I can’t give you a formal or legal status.” 

Mingyu gingerly pushes the button in front which opens the box and audibly  _ gasps _ as more tears spill down his eyes. Nestled in between the white silk is a  _ platinum ring, _ set with a brilliant-cut diamond. It’s Cartier because Junhui wants to give Mingyu the best.

Even like this with emotions overwhelming Mingyu’s whole being, Junhui finds him  _ flawlessly beautiful. _ He’ll always find Mingyu beautiful,  _ both inside out _ until he takes his last breath on this planet. And even in the afterlife, Junhui will sing praises of Mingyu because that is what the younger deserves —  _ to be loved forever. _

“There is an old Chinese tradition which dictates that wearing a ring on the middle finger means that the person is engaged or already spoken for. People rarely follow it nowadays but I thought that this could be  _ our little secret _ if you want.” Junhui explains as he fixes his eyes on the box on Mingyu’s palm. “I just want to be  _ yours, _ Mingyu. And I just want you to be  _ mine.” _

“Why are your actions– al-always so unpredictable?” Mingyu stutters. Then he looks at Junhui expectantly.  _ Urgently. _ “Where is yours?” 

“Right here.” Junhui fishes the second box out and finally feels the weight  _ lift off. _ He opens the box to reveal an identical ring placed inside. 

“God, I could hate you right now because you are making me cry,” Mingyu whines and then covers his face with his free hand as more tears meander down his beautiful and radiant face.

Junhui stays quiet and lets Mingyu recover from this shock of his life. At least the younger doesn’t seem repulsed by the gesture and it releases a lot of tension out of Junhui’s muscles. 

Mingyu slowly reaches for the ring and pulls it out of the box. His fingers trace the swanky band and the diamonds, fascinated by the piece of jewellery in his finger. Mingyu licks his lips and looks at Junhui desirously.

“Put it on me.”

“Are you sure?” Junhui still asks because he wants to give Mingyu one last chance to think everything over.  _ Their love, their bond, their relationship, their reputation. _ Although deep down, he knows he won’t allow Mingyu to run away. Mingyu has readily fallen deep down Junhui’s waters and there is no escape now. 

“Let me be  _ yours, _ Junhwi.” 

Junhui unravels the meaning of those words and nods his head vigorously while blinking off the tears. 

He gently holds Mingyu’s left hand and with shivering hands, slips the cold metal on his middle finger. The ring fits perfectly and Junhui thinks this little band signifies the ultimate truth that  _ Kim Mingyu is wholly loved by Wen Junhui. _ And he will be loved in all the good and the bad times, unreservedly.

Mingyu plucks the other box from Junhui’s hand and pulls the ring out. He bends down to set aside the two boxes and stands straight. A shy smile adorns Mingyu’s face, the red completely enhancing his godly face.

His hands shake as they grab hold of Junhui’s left hand and the elder can sense that Mingyu is inundated by way too many emotions all at once yet tries to compose himself. It’s an  _ endearing _ gesture. Mingyu’s grin widens gradually as he slips the ring on Junhui’s middle finger. Junhui thinks that this little band of platinum signifies the ultimate truth that  _ Wen Junhui is completely loved by Kim Mingyu. _ And he will be loved in all the good and the bad times, thoroughly. 

Once the exchange of rings is finished, Mingyu sobs a little more and Junhui follows his suit because apparently crying is  _ infectious _ now. Then he pulls the elder man into his warm embrace and this is home, Junhui thinks. This single man is his home.  _ Home. _

“I love you so much and it hurts but it hurts good,” Mingyu mumbles over the shell of Junhui’s ears.

“Okay, masochist.” Junhui quips. Mingyu squeezes his body in retaliation and Junhui croaks from pain. “Ah, okay! I love you, too! I have loved you even  _ before _ I met you, Mingyu. And love is the  _ only thing _ I can give without restraints.” 

Their relationship has always been out of the norm. They met and then fell in love  _ too fast _ and did everything all at once. And in a very  _ tragically similar fashion, _ they burnt down fast. But in these past seventeen months, they have learnt to take things slow and move like a glacier. 

Everything with Mingyu feels exciting and not forced or rushed. It just feels right.  _ Fortunate. Fit. Absolute. _

Eventually, they separate and stand side by side, to admire the beautiful panorama around them. Mingyu stands on Junhui’s right side and places his left arm around Junhui’s shoulder and the elder leans his head over the younger’s.

_ Peaceful. Relaxing. Secluded. _

“Hyung?”

“Hmm.”

“What is your opinion on kids?”

The peace dissipates away and Junhui traverses the deep depths of his brain for an answer.

_ Kids. _ Mingyu with a kid or two in his arms. It would be a  _ sheer struggle, _ but they would get  _ unmatched joy _ from knowing they are responsible for the future of this world. The responsibility of moulding a life and showing a young human the beauty of life would be hard but rewarding. And Mingyu loves kids. Junhui knows he wants to have kids with Mingyu, he knows it in his  _ heart. _ But for now, it is too early. As much as they might  _ think _ they are ready, they aren’t.

But Junhui does not deny the idea of having kids. He just stores it in the corner of his mind and locks it away for the time being.

“That question came out of the blue. Are you trying to  _ suggest something?” _ Junhui asks. He definitely knows Mingyu is smiling. He feels Mingyu turn his head and leave a kiss on the side of his head.

_ “Actually, yes,” _ Mingyu’s voice sounds youthful. “I was hoping.” 

Junhui waits for Mingyu to finish his sentence but the continuation never happens. 

“Hoping?”

_ “Hoping,” _ Mingyu replies with a determined voice. 

Junhui’s heart is filled with the nectar of love as he realises the younger isn’t forcing the next step. He’s just putting the idea and giving Junhui the freedom of choice.  _ Freedom.  _

Junhui feels a  _ fury of love _ take over him, and he tilts his head up and places his left hand over Mingyu’s cheeks. He looks at him with pure devotion and Mingyu leans in to kiss Junhui.

Junhui kisses him hard with a renewed passion and lets the wetness linger between them. He  _ drowns _ in Mingyu and the latter’s body  _ rages _ with intense fire. In this sacred moment, Junhui thinks that Mingyu is all that  _ matters _ to him. 

Junhui breaks the kiss reluctantly because he wants the younger to know.

“Anything is possible if you hope.”

Ripples of hope bloom in Mingyu’s eyes, and he shines so radiantly. Junhui properly envelops his arms around the younger man and kisses him back.  _ Hot and moist. Hot and moist. _ But oh so  _ sweet and tender. _ He feels the flutter of excitement and nervousness in his stomach, just like their first time. 

Their teeth collide and somewhere far in some other galaxy,  _ stars collide. _ Junhui swallows the  _ sun _ on Mingyu’s lips and in return gives him the  _ moon _ through his fingertips. 

“What do you want now, my love?” Junhui asks in between the kiss. It seems like Mingyu does not wish to part from Junhui and the latter can’t really complain about it.

_ “You,” _ Mingyu breathes. “More and more.” 

With their souls intertwined, Junhui can hear the wind sing them the  _ melody of endless love. _ He sees the face of a man he has  _ loved before, _ that he  _ loves now _ and that he will  _ love for all eternity.  _

Junhui readily  _ gives himself _ to Mingyu. His heart, mind, body and soul.

  
Mingyu holds him tight and Junhui  _ takes all of him _ in return.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> byeongjang: sergeant
> 
> this was a seven month long journey and we have finally reached the destination. i can't believe that i am done with this story and honestly, i am kind of emotional(?) right now! but i am also glad that it is over because this whole thing somehow took over me and got out of control.  
> i really want to thank everyone who joined me in this journey of two people finding love and redemption through each other. if this story was able to make you laugh, cry, hope or learn something new, then that is more than enough for me and i am content with the results.
> 
> if you liked the story, then let me know in the comments. i love reading your thoughts!  
> well, i will see you all next time! i love you ♥♥♥
> 
> [twitter](https://twitter.com/redsyub) | [curiouscat](https://curiouscat.me/redsyub)


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